For Those of You Who NEVER Tip in a Restaurant

[chobie]

So does that mean that servers should give more attention to the tables that order more expensive stuff, based on the fact that (in theory) they'll get more of a tip?

If I'm not all that hungry and I just order soup and a sandwich, and the table next to me orders filet mignon, does that mean that they deserve more service because my total is lower and therefore my tip is likely lower?

What about people dining solo, or couples as compared to parties of 5 or 6 - bigger parties mean higher bills which means more of a tip. Does that mean they've "earned" more service?

I'm a tipper. I have on occasion left no tip when I've had atrocious service (and I mean truly terrible). I've left up to 50% as a tip for truly outstanding service. But regardless of how much I'm tipping, I still expect a basic level of service. That's what these folks were hired to do.

What about people who have never been in an establishment before? I'm sure they're sized up when they walk in to guestimate how much of a tip they'll leave - do the nicer-dressed people deserve better service?

Servers have to pay their rent. They are going to do what they need to do.
Whether its right or wrong or what they should or shouldn't do, is irrelevant IMO.

 

[oracle]

As I said, I will tip if you deserve it. But I won't kiss your butt just so you'll do the job you were hired for.

If you can't handle the job then get another one.

If this attitude makes you feel better about stiffing your server, then so be it. But what you and all the other non-tippers need to realize is that if everyone followed you and your nonsensical Emily Post etiquette, servers would then have to be paid minimum wage instead of the $2 per hour they make now, since their tips would no longer provide a liveable wage. The logical result of that wage increase would be an increase in menu prices.

Right now, you've just found a way to justify your cheapness with no real consequences. But if everyone followed your lead, you'd just end up paying more for your meals. If you can't be bothered to tip, then don't go out to eat, it's as simple as that.

Tipping is a standard expectation, and just because you don't agree with it does not make it okay to not pay. Maybe you could run your logic past the IRS next time tax season rolls around. I'm sure they'd see the light.

 

[gina2000]

A couple of points.....

Larger tables need more service by definition. There are more people to service. Sure their bill is higher if the menu has similarly priced items. Sure they leave more of a tip. More people = more service = bigger bill. If you go into a restaurant where there is a large group dining, usually 2 or 3 waitstaff people will wait on the table. Getting all the food out at the same time, hot, and providing all the side dishes, refreshing drinks all at the same time is juggling to even the best waitstaff. They haven't "earned" more service, they need it by definition.

You'll be out of a restaurant far faster if you order soup and a salad verses filet mignon. You don't usually need as much service and the waitstaff should be tipped proportionately. With the exception of WDW, however, most people dining in better establishments are ordering 3 course meals...which is alot more work and more time consuming than a simple soup and salad. Larger bill also. Turning over a table twice in an evening can be lucrative if the patrons tip appropriately. But if they don't, the waitstaff has lost an evening's revenue. Most better establishments only allow their waitstaff to wait on a FEW tables per evening. And larger groups usually have a service charge added to their bill so the patrons cannot stiff the waitstaff who may be devoting their entire evening to one table.

As far as waitstaff doing a better job with a patron they know will tip well.... Hey, they're human. Don't you respond better to people who treat you better? And since patrons have direct control over the waitstaffs' revenues, I cannot see any better reason for the waitstaff to respond accordingly. That's the point of tipping, remember?

 

[disney4us2002]

I agree that this is the custom, and personally I follow it, as I've said. I just don't happen to think that the fact that a particular customer has not tipped well (or at all) in the past is an excuse for poor service in the future.

But reading thru chattyholic's reply doesn't strike me as "poor service". Here's her reply:

"...If I wait on someone three times and they never tip, that's the end of good service. If you don't want to pay for good service you're not going to get it, period. I will smile and be polite to you, and I will bring your food as soon as the cook has it ready (and I will NOT spit in it as I've heard some servers do to non-tippers) and I will come back ONCE to refill your drink and ask if everything is all right. Then I will put the bill on your table and be done with you...."

That's poor service? What the heck is good service? I don't think we ever get more than a one-time check on "how is everything" and "can I bring a refill". Personally, I don't care for the restaurants with people hovering over you and refilling your water glass after every sip but I suppose that is considered good service.

Former waitress and pizza delivery person here so I say rock on Chatty.

 

[disneysteve]

if everyone followed you and your nonsensical Emily Post etiquette, servers would then have to be paid minimum wage instead of the $2 per hour they make now, since their tips would no longer provide a liveable wage. The logical result of that wage increase would be an increase in menu prices.

I agree and I think that's exactly what should happen. I would happily pay 15-20% more for my meal and not have to tip. It is so much easier when I'm with 2 or 3 other couples and the tip is added on automatically. I've got no problem with that at all.

 

[disneysteve]

What the heck is good service?

I think the answer to this varies depending on the type and level of the restaurant. What I was commenting on was chattyholic's statement, "If you don't want to pay for good service you're not going to get it, period." That sounds to me like she intentionally provides a poorer level of service to someone who she expects to not give a tip.

By the way, I agree that what chattyholic described doesn't sound all that bad depending on the caliber of the restaurant. It was more the intent behind that service that I was referring to.

 

[sha_lyn]

From the example she gave it seems she will jsut go above and beyond for a non tipper. Can't say as I blame her one bit.

 

[totalia]

If this attitude makes you feel better about stiffing your server, then so be it. But what you and all the other non-tippers need to realize is that if everyone followed you and your nonsensical Emily Post etiquette, servers would then have to be paid minimum wage instead of the $2 per hour they make now, since their tips would no longer provide a liveable wage. The logical result of that wage increase would be an increase in menu prices.

Right now, you've just found a way to justify your cheapness with no real consequences. But if everyone followed your lead, you'd just end up paying more for your meals. If you can't be bothered to tip, then don't go out to eat, it's as simple as that.

Tipping is a standard expectation, and just because you don't agree with it does not make it okay to not pay. Maybe you could run your logic past the IRS next time tax season rolls around. I'm sure they'd see the light.

Yes and? They should be paid minimum wage anyway.

Btw, let me say it again since it seems to fall on deaf ears....

WAIT STAFF HERE DO NOT RECEIVE LESS THAN MINIMUM WAGE.

I am NOT American. Yall do things weird down there and some people end up getting screwed by your own laws.

 

[Yzma and Kronk]

I am NOT American. Yall do things weird down there and some people end up getting screwed by your own laws.

Here we go again..........

 

[disneymom3]

BTW, when I have my twins with me, the tip usually goes to 30%....cuz they can make a pretty big mess!

LOL! Oh yeah, we always tip well when we are with our kids cause I figure the real work begins after we leave! I have seen my kitchen floor, thank you!

 

[totalia]

Very valid reason to tip. After all, they have to go above and beyond their duties because of the mess.

That I can agree with.

 

[oracle]

Btw, let me say it again since it seems to fall on deaf ears....

WAIT STAFF HERE DO NOT RECEIVE LESS THAN MINIMUM WAGE.

I am NOT American. Yall do things weird down there and some people end up getting screwed by your own laws.

I'm not American either. And you're still wrong. I've served tables in both Ontario and Alberta, and waitstaff do not make minimum wage (at least by law they don't). In Ontario, servers are making less than $6 per hour. I don't know where in Canada you're from, but Ontario servers definitely do not make minimum wage.

 

[oracle]

I agree and I think that's exactly what should happen. I would happily pay 15-20% more for my meal and not have to tip. It is so much easier when I'm with 2 or 3 other couples and the tip is added on automatically. I've got no problem with that at all.

I agree that the system is definitely flawed. The problem I see with simply raising menu prices and eliminating tipping is that there's no longer a monetary incentive for servers to provide good service. Granted, it wouldn't be much of a problem at higher end places where service is important. But for the server at Denny's working 10 tables, suddenly they might not be rushing to refill your drinks. I think there are problems with any system because serving tables is such a personalized service. But I'll agree with you for sure that the system, as is, has significant flaws.

 

[Chattyaholic]

I guess I should clarify something, instead of saying "if you're not willing to pay for good service, you're not going to get it", I should have said "if you're not willing to pay for good service, you're going to just get adequate service" that is more what I meant.

I will give adequate service to "regulars" that never tip but I just don't go "above and beyond" the call of regular duty.

Yes, it's my "job" to serve them even though I know they don't tip, and I will smile and serve them adequately. But I won't be rushing back to their table a second and third time.

If some of you feel that's wrong, it's your right to feel that way. But servers need to earn a living too and I'm not going to neglect a potential tipper to go back to the non-tipper more than once.

But like I said, I've been a server going on 9 years and 99% of our customers are great. Most tip something, and many, many tip very well, especially "regulars" that we have formed a "relationship" with. And thankfully the non-tippers are few and far between, but I've just never been able to understand how they can come in time after time after time and stiff their servers. Yes, some may be ignorant and just not realize they are supposed to tip, but not all are that way. And when they SEE other people leave money on the tables and when they SEE us counting our money from our tip cups at the end of the shift, well....then it's just not right. Like someone else said, if you don't want to tip, don't go out to eat. Tipping, like it or not, is "the way its done" in THIS country and as the saying goes "when in Rome, do as the Romans do."

 

[disneysteve]

The problem I see with simply raising menu prices and eliminating tipping is that there's no longer a monetary incentive for servers to provide good service.

Sorry, but I think that's a flawed argument. I don't work in a tip-based occupation. I'm paid a flat hourly wage. Does that mean I should not feel any incentive to do a great job and provide top-notch service to everyone I take care of? Should I just muddle through providing adequate service, the least I can get by with and still keep my job? Of course not. I do the best I can do because I want to, I enjoy my work, I want to help build the business and I want to be respected as a good worker. Are there immediate financial rewards for that? Not exactly, but I do get a raise periodically, perhaps a bonus at the end of the year. My point is I don't do a good job just to get more money. I do a good job because its the right thing to do.

 

[Lucky4me]

I waited tables for years. I started out at at Mom and Pop type joints and ended up in very high end restaurants. In peak season, I'd make close to $1000 a week for 5 nights including Friday and Saturday. Very rarely did I put in a 40 hour week. More like 30. I did have seniority and was given the best stations and the largest parties to wait on.

I had a very difficult time remembering people I had previously waited on even if they had given me a lousy tip. I treated everyone with the same attention to detail and gave the best service I could. Getting stiffed was part of the business and I expected it from time to time. I also expected big tips and most of the time got them. It was the most frustrating, back breaking, degrading and menial job I ever had. The money was the only thing that made it bearable.
I now tip based soley on the fact I am very grateful I don't have to do it anymore.

 

[gina2000]

I don't know what you do for a living, Steve, but waitpeople take orders from anyone and everyone. They jump for a glass of water or an extra napkin. I'm sure you work to please people but within a framework established by your profession. You ultimately control the situation and can refuse to do something based on job description. And if you work for yourself, you can choose to walk away any time you would like. In a waitstaff position, the patron and the kitchen control the situation, not the waitstaff. They are the middleman trying to please a patron and hoping the kitchen lives up to an unknown patron's expectation.

There's a vast difference watching a good waitperson work and someone who works at McDonalds, Starbucks, Rustler Steak House or anywhere that tips are not part of their salary. Sure they work. Sure they work very hard. But they don't hustle to please YOU. You'll lose that if waitstaff is paid hourly. And you can't compare it to a salaried, professional position in terms of pleasing people. Different parameters and that creates a totally different ballgame.

 

[ckay87]

Yes and? They should be paid minimum wage anyway.

Oh yea, let's keep those little people in their place.

Folks, we just need to let this one go. The cheap don't tip, period.

 

[DisneyDmbNut]

There was once an article in Dear Abby or Ann Landers about a waitress that received a quarter tip for a $10.00 meal...she was so mad that she went to the parking lot and told the man that "here, you need this more than I do" when he gave her a funny look she explained about tipping and the man was so surprised..he was from another country ( I am not sure ) and he said that waitress made very good money there and tipping was just kinda an extra thing.
The point of the writer was that maybe some people don't know what the custom.


ANYWAY!!

I agree with the person above, if I get really lousy service ( something that isn't related to the kitchen, because I know they can't help that ) I will leave 10%..I don't want them to think I forgot.

But, I do try to leave a cash tip...If I use my check card ( like I did last night ) I left the tip in cash because my bartender friend said sometimes she has a hard time getting the money from the owner off charges.

 

[disneychrista]

It is very easy to get the "tips" left on a credit card, you take the cash out of your drawer. I have seen them do this at restaurants and it what they do where I work. As long as your cash/credit cards balance to your sales the all is good.