I don't have to do this often, but....
here is the standard "play nice reminder." It's OK to disagree, but it's not OK to use sarcasm, call names, etc, etc.
In my years as a nurse, I have talked with diabetics who injected thru clothing, some who never heard of it, some who would never do it and the same for doing blood testing and injections in the bathroom. And most of the people who did one thing would not be able to convince those who did the opposite to change. Whatever works.
I'm one of those (evil?) moms who sometimes uses a handicapped stall with two kids. I'm sure I take longer than a single user would take too. But maybe there is more to this than meets the eye....
I think most people would agree with you that not all disabilities are visible and all are important. My own FIL should use a handicapped stall because of his very bad knees and hips, but he won't because he doesn't feel he is "disabled enough". No one (except the person in the stall) knows whether or not they need the "features" of the handicapped accessible stall (whatever "features" are important to that person, whether it is grab bars, extra room, etc). I hope we haven't given the impression that any mom with 2 kids who uses the handicapped stall is "evil". I personally don't care who uses the stall, just that they are considerate of others who might need it. There are some people who take longer than a single user would take - my DD takes more time than a single person would normally take. All I ask is that people try not to take more time than
they need to take. I have, unfortunately waited for people who were using one of those handicapped stalls with a sink to all comb their hair, the mom to refresh her makeup and the kids to wash suntan lotion off their arms and faces so they could apply more. That is inconsiderate use since those things could be done outside of the stall. A mother trying to help her autistic son is not inconsiderate, just doing what she needs to do.
And who would "police" these stalls, and determine whose needs are legitimate and whose aren't? Would that mean that because my son's disability is not visible we would have to keep going to the back of the line any time someone in a WC comes in behind us? Or as suggested elsewhere, shoud I put a sticker on my DS so everyone can "see" that he too has a disability??
I hope I didn't give the impression that I meant the stalls should be policed or marked in any way to allow only people with "legitimate needs" to use them. I meant to have the stalls marked to indentify the stalls so people would know what they are. Some people are clueless or don't care and would use them anyway, but my DD and I have seen people who had not realized until they got in that the stall was an accessible stall. They were embarrased and apologetic because we were waiting to use the stall when they got out. I have also directed some people to the handicapped stall because they were not used to traveling with a person with a disability. In one case (when I was traveling without my DD), an older woman was trying to help her mom (in a wheelchair and barely able to stand) to use a regular stall. They didn't know that handicapped stalls existed and were very happy for the help. I helped her transfer and then gave them "toilets 101" to help identify the handicapped stall. I've even used a stall with grab bars without knowing that's what it was because it was not bigger than a regular stall and for some reason all the stalls in that bathroom opened out (boy, did I finish and get out of there quick).
In the end, I think we all have to remember to do our best to try to be considerate of everyone around us, regardless of apparent abilities or disabilities.
I agree completely. Well said.