While visiting the Internet, DIS or other sites, have you come across mean people?

[snoopy]

I've come across some real meanies, but for the most part I think most people in this community have good hearts. I try and overlook when people lose hold of thier emotions on the Internet - because I've been there and know how that feels. When you write something you later regret, it tends to stick with you longer than if you said it. I try cutting people some slack unless they write negative things continuously, and then I chalk it up to the fact that they are probably pretty unhappy in "real life".

I have to say I have been pleasantly surprised with every single person I have met from this community, without exception. One person that I met who I had a not-so-good relationship with on-line, turned out to be someone I found easy to talk to and quite likeable off-line. So you just never know, sometimes someone you consider mean can really be just the opposite.

I don't know if I would be so lucky if I were meeting people outside this community on the Internet, this place just seems to attract nice people. I think if you compared the DIS to other sites I have seen where people are ripping into each other on a daily basis, you'd find things run very smoothly. Whether that is because the Webmasters run a tight ship here, or because we just have a majority of nice people here, I don't know. Probably a combination of both.

 

[aahmom1]

I've come across a few mean people, but I've come across at least 2 people I would call evil.

 

[Patrick IL.]

I think a big drawback to the "net" is we lose that face to face contact...where you can read facial expressions ect..
Some of us have been very fortunate to be able to meet others who post on our site, I can honestly say I have not meet a diser who I did not truely enjoy. I have had them at our home, met them at thiers, in malls, for dinner and also down in Orlando.

Even the occasional diser who I may have had a "misunderstanding" with on line, if I meet them face to face, have a real chance to talk and communicate, we get along fine Face to face is a whole different ballgame people, you can not just shut off the keyboard I always try to remember to treat people the way I would want someone to treat my wife or kids.

 

[Mackey Mouse]

You know what....unless we became a government where I am not entitled to my opinion, I stand by my original comments...

In real life, meeting people face to face, is where it does get real...and I have enjoyed meeting all that I have met so far whether at DisCon or just by chance...and how I spend my money is my business unless I have asked for loans to finance my vacations... hugs...

Merry Christmas all...

 

[gina2000]

When I look at mean people on the net, I mostly see anger and heartbreak, lonliness and denial.

I can't help these people. I don't try to. I only can fulfill my own needs and aspirations.

I have met some of the most wonderful people in the world on the net. To deny their existance because of where I met them is a travesty. To ignore that relationship is a lie. I'd go to the ends of the earth for some people, here and in my own everyday life.

I'll take my chances both here and in real life. The gain is too large to deny.

 

[glo]

Like real life, you meet all types of people. I don't think I have come across anyone I would clasify as mean. I have had disagreements and arguments, and I have been hurt, but for the most part have been lucky. I guess it depends on how you look at things and people.

 

[TheLionKing]

I give most people on the internet the benefit of the doubt until I can meet them in person.

 

[Mackey Mouse]

You know what... Dave.. you make me smile... I have had the pleasure of meeting you in person..you make me smile on the boards and in person.. Hugs and Merry Christmas

 

[LunarLady]

Yes, I have come across some people that I term as "vile". However, I see many, many more happy and upbeat people than I do the vile ones.

I think it's all a matter of choice: I can choose to concentrate on the unhappy people and make myself unhappy in the bargain, or I can choose to concentrate on people I like being around and make myself happy.

While there are skads of unhappy and mean people out there, there are just too many wonderful, giving and enjoyable people to choose from who are much more fun talk to.

 

[glo]

I'll tell you why I spent the money to go to DIS Con...some of the nicest people I have met were going to be down there. People whose families I have met and I wanted to spend time with. Last year I did the same thing, I went because people I had met were down there. Maybe I am a big chicken, but had I not known people I might not have gone....

The internet is very different from real life, whether you want to believe it or not. The internet you can shut off, and never go back to, something that is a little more difficult in real life. A person on the internet can be completely different in real life. Face it, here you can lie and say you are a brain surgeon and who would know. You can tell someone that you care about them and be lying through your teeth. People will say things here they would never say to someone face to face, and the result of those words are never truely seen.

I think that PatrickIL said it best. Act the way you would want people to act towards you and your loved ones. You can't go wrong with that.

 

[bsnyder]

I agree with Glo...there are some real differences between the Net and real life, and I think Mackey was just pointing out one of those differences. Here, we have a choice of whether or not we engage in relationships, the extent of those relationships, and if we choose to, we can extend that relationship to a face to face meeting. But it's still a choice, and one that we don't always have in real life.

As far as the people on this particular site, most are wonderful! There are a few that I would never choose to meet in real life, but thankfully it's a very few.

 

[EROS]

Originally posted by glo
Face it, hear you can lie and say you are a brain surgeon and who would know.

You're right. I have to come clean. I am NOT .....................a Brain Surgeon . Perhaps I'm REALLY an Islamic radical posting from the Middle East. Orrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, a beautiful Scandinavian model posting from Oslo. Orrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, an escaped felon on the run. Only THE SHADOW KNOWS...... .........

 

[MonaCK]

One more thought about this....

I find that the people I am closest to on the internet are the ones who I have either met in real life, or who I intend on meeting in real life. Just about everyone is how they are.. the way they act on the internet is how they are in real life. Therefore, they are the ones that I respect the most and who I feel I can maintain real life friendships with.

Of course, I might have a different perspective on this. I've been "on the net" in some form or another since 1989, and on the actual internet since 1992, which is well before most people had ever heard of being "on line". I think that experience has helped me be able to better weed out those who I would want to get to know better.

So far, I haven't really been too disappointed in my choice of friends.. and unfortunately.. I have also not been disappointed in my choice of who I choose not to be friends with.

Just two more cents on this matter

*plink* *plink*

 

[babar]

When talking about who I would want to meet in real life, I think I would most want to meet the people who I argue with on the net. I would love to see if they would say what they say on here to my face.

I also would want to see their reaction when they see me, because I bet l look and act nothing like they'd expect. Not saying what I say here is false, but there is much more to me than what I post here.

 

[goofygirl]

Yep, I have. But I dont take them too seriously, they are not worth the time nor energy.

Dan, you are one of the most pleasent people I've ever encountered on the net, and in person too

 

[SeaSpray]

I've been online for almost 9 years which is a long time in "internet-years" I have met many people in person over the course of those 9 years. When I lived in NJ, there was an IRC channel (chat room) called #newjersey and we'd have frequent local get togethers. That was fun. I also met one of my best female friends online. It turned out that she lived only 15 minutes away. We didn't become good *friends* until after getting together several times and sharing experiences together.

I don't mean to offend anyone, but my personal feeling is this: I can only think of someone as a real friend if I've met them and spent a considerable amount of time with them, *developing* a friendship. I wish there was a different word that described the "friends" I have here online who I've never met and only "talk" to briefly in threads. I do realize that many of you email each other a lot and really have gotten to know each other. I think that's great I think there's definitely a place for "friends" such as that. But I can't get all excited or upset or angry or any strong emotions like that, over someone I really don't know. When I read of people's problems or joys, I honestly do feel badly or happy for them. But it's almost the same as if I were reading a good book and reading about the sorrows and joys of the characters in that book, if that makes any sense. The feelings invoked when I read these threads are real, and I do mean everything I say, when I say it. But I feel there's no real connection between myself and the other person.

For the last 3 years I have been part of an email loop of all women; we're all stay at home moms who are over 30. Well, now some of us are over 40. lol We all share very personal aspects of our lives, on a daily basis. I honestly can't consider them to be "friends" because something is missing. It's that personal contact that you have with friends you've had in person. I did meet 2 of them last winter and that was great. But how much can you get to know someone over a 2-hour lunch??

Admittedly, I would miss my mom's email loop and I would miss the DIS boards if suddenly I wasn't able to access them anymore.

So...as for "mean" people, which was Dan's original question... Yes, there are mean people online. They are mean people, period, because SOMEONE is on the other side of the screen typing. And if they say mean things online, then that makes them mean, no matter how they act in person.

(yikes, didn't mean to ramble on like this. LOL)

 

[glo]

Sorry I just spewed my water all over my screen. EROS. I always thought you were a male stipper at Alex's in Stoughton to be honest

 

[Boots]

I have never really "met" anyone on the "net" except here on the DIS. It took me a very long time to come out of lurking. On the whole everyone has been extremely nice to me. Maybe one day I can go to DIS CON and you all can decide if the real Boots is the same in person as she is on the web!!!

 

[nuke]

Unforunately yes. I also let them get to me, which I am sorry for. There is no reason to get upset over internet boards. There is especially no reason to hold grudges, belittle people, and keep the ugliness going for long periods of time. Some people can't let go and get move on.

 

[JohnTBap]

The meanest person I have met on the Internet hides behind a facade of sweetness and light. This person cares very selectively, and woe be unto you if you are not in the "inner circle." You may not believe it, but know that if you are not one of the "chosen ones" your threads will be unceremoniously bumped from page one due to a posting frenzy by the "inner circle" orchestrated via PM.

And everybody who is anybody knows that EROS is a one-legged Lithuanian cross-dresser posting from federal prison.