Oprah Debt Diet Show, Part II

[mickeyfan2]

Can someone explain to me how you "exchange a piano for a less expensive one" and "return a big screen TV"? Two great moves, in my opinion, but I'm seriously wondering how that works.

I think Oprah helped with these. You cannot just return a lease or a purchase and get out of them.

 

[mickeyfan2]

The Bradley's have 170K of debt on their report. Jean then found more debt that was unpaid that was more than 20K. So they could really have about 200K in personal debt.

BTW I have always read the rule of thumb is if your consumer debt is greater than or equal to your gross income, you will never be able to pay it off.

 

[Tine731]

What happened to the 3rd family from part 1? They were both teachers and had kids in high school. 3 boys if I remember correctly. The money adviser that was helping them was a man. Did they do an update on this family?

Anyone know the answer?

 

[dvcgirl]

Anyone know the answer?

Well, today there was a clip of the teacher on the phone with CC companies where it appeared like she was negotiating her interest rates. Perhaps they'll pick up with them again on part III?

 

[tigger 12]

I was telling DH about the show and I told him that I bet the Bradley's will be back in debt. I don't care for the wife's attitude. She's very snooty. I feel bad for her husband. He seems like a passive guy. I bet if he walked up out the door and left her in debt she'd straightned out. I think he should leave her to teach her a lesson. Even her nasty attitude about her hair. Come on? I could tell she didn't want to give up the cable, flat screen t.v. and the grand piano. She'll be back in debt for sure. She's very high maintenance and likes to keep up with the "Jones".

 

[DVC Sadie]

I think Oprah helped with these. You cannot just return a lease or a purchase and get out of them.

ITA, Mickeyfan. I also think Oprah is going to be paying for Lisa Bradleys hair salon appointments. I can hardly wait to see all the gifts she's going to be giving these families for being such good sports for going on her show.

 

[mom2alix]

and Lisa Bradley needs to shave her head.............

DH thinks her husband shoud shave her head! I have no doubt that if I spent $7000 a year on my hair and DH found out I would wake up bald one morning.


Who knows maybe she cold shave it and Oprah will lend her that Tina Turner wig she used to wear.

 

[disneysteve]

DH thinks her husband shoud shave her head!

That would help a lot. I bought a clipper about a year ago for $15 and that is the grand total of what we have spent on hair care in this house since then. I cut my own hair. DW cuts her own. And one or the other of us cuts DD's. So we've spent $15 for 3 people vs. $7,000 for one person. Incredible.

 

[travellady]

I'm always amazed when I hear stories like this. Do I have debt? Yes. I have a mortgage, and do carry a balance on my credit card, and have a car payment on 1 of our 2 cars. But, if I were to lose my job tomorrow, we could live for 2 years+ without making another dime nor selling anything. If I sold my house and downsized, I'm looking at 4 years+ without a job. And we are a single income family to begin with so I'm not even talking about relying on 1 income. I'm talking about no income other than living on what we've saved.

When we adopted our 12 year old son, we made a decision to live on 1 income, or 1 income with no more than part time at the most. My husband has been a stay at home dad for 12 years and we're thankful for that. All the financial decisions we've made are within these parameters. And by his being home, I've been able to focus on my career, go above and beyond when needed, and reap the rewards of hard work and focus.

So many people screw up their priorities along the way. It's hard for me to get into their heads and that kind of thinking. I have such a hard time understanding attachment to material goods but I know it's a problem for many. To me, having too much stuff, too many hair appts., too much worry about appearance, would be wearing and time consuming. Going out to eat a lot takes the specialness of it away, adds calories, and menus start looking the same after awhile. I honestly have a really really hard time getting these behaviours

Now don't ask me about my travel passion, that is a weakness. But I am a Priceline queen, a constant monitor of airline rates, an avid hotel points user, and can always find a good place to eat, cheap.

 

[kfeuer]

The Bradley's have 170K of debt on their report. Jean then found more debt that was unpaid that was more than 20K. So they could really have about 200K in personal debt.

BTW I have always read the rule of thumb is if your consumer debt is greater than or equal to your gross income, you will never be able to pay it off.

I've read the same thing, mickeyfan2. I honestly don't see how they could ever pay off consumer debt that's probably close to twice their gross income even IF they were willing to really make sacrifices, which they clearly aren't. Oprah is way off base defending her hair expenses, IMO. I can't fathom putting my marriage and family on the line because of my hair!?! And I thought Jean was still being too soft when Lisa Bradley threw her temper tantrum in the beauty shop. Come on, would it really kill her to go 1.5 weeks between appointments? Grow up already! Despite being on Oprah you're not a celebrity, nobody really cares what your hair looks like. The next show looks interesting--looks like the deeper reasons for this behavior are going to come out.

The other family seems more willing, and I thought their financial planner was also tougher (in a good way). The mom needs to work on her attitude, though. What's wrong with selling your kid's clothes? I'm willing to bet that spoiled girl has way more clothes then she needs. I really hope they made their daughter pay for that boot incident. Her attitude when she came home made me angry, she obviously didn't care that she'd just thrown $80 down the toilet. The amount of money that family has been wasting on late fees, overdrafts, etc. just blew my mind.

 

[dvcgirl]

I've read the same thing, mickeyfan2. I honestly don't see how they could ever pay off consumer debt that's probably close to twice their gross income even IF they were willing to really make sacrifices, which they clearly aren't. Oprah is way off base defending her hair expenses, IMO. I can't fathom putting my marriage and family on the line because of my hair!?! And I thought Jean was still being too soft when Lisa Bradley threw her temper tantrum in the beauty shop. Come on, would it really kill her to go 1.5 weeks between appointments? Grow up already! Despite being on Oprah you're not a celebrity, nobody really cares what your hair looks like. The next show looks interesting--looks like the deeper reasons for this behavior are going to come out.

The other family seems more willing, and I thought their financial planner was also tougher (in a good way). The mom needs to work on her attitude, though. What's wrong with selling your kid's clothes? I'm willing to bet that spoiled girl has way more clothes then she needs. I really hope they made their daughter pay for that boot incident. Her attitude when she came home made me angry, she obviously didn't care that she'd just thrown $80 down the toilet. The amount of money that family has been wasting on late fees, overdrafts, etc. just blew my mind.

I agree, Lisa Bradley has other huge issues going on inside of her to get to where she is. Mega self-esteem issues there for sure. To risk everything, including your family's well-being....which is exactly what she is doing....for what? For stuff. Clothes, hair, a house, piano, cars.....none of it affordable to them.

Family #2, I have hope for them. I think that they'll make it. Even if the Mom is showing some resistance now, I think she'll turn it around. They're trying to work the budget, whereas Bradley doesn't seem to comprehend the concept.

 

[J.Cooper]

I have to chime in on this one. I saw the show and think Lisa is trying to live like the Jones. I can tell she is a spoiled brat. Her tantrum in the beauty salon was uncalled for. Now I have the same texture of hair as Lisa and I don't need to go to the salon once a week. I can go "2 weeks". She's just high maintenance. Her husband needs to put his foot down. I hope her daughter doesn't take her same habits!

 

[keagansmom]

This is amazing to watch! With the Bradley's I don't understand how the husband could just sit back and watch the bills pilling up and not open them! I mean the piles were all over the kitchen and (this is just me) if my husband was doing this, I would take over and open the bills. He comes off as more of the victim but he must get something out of it if he allows it to continue. I think he liked people thinking that they "had it made" just as much as she does. But, I also found it interesting that he spent way less than his budgeted allotment per week and she still spent double. Now, they don't interview their children but their son looks like he is old enough to get what is going on. I wonder what he thinks? I don't get the hair thing, but my hair is different (i.e. long and straight) so I can't comment there.

The second family is struggling as well. I did feel bad for them about the boot (definately the duaghters fault) and the truck. It always seems like when you decide to get serious about your budget those little "items" pop up and test your resolve. I found it interesting that they borrowed the money from the other daughter.

 

[jonestavern]

I really didn't look at Lisa's confrontation with Jean, in the salon, as a temper tantrum or anything ugly--uncomfortable--definitely--but she didn't get nasty. I simply thought of it as another 'withdrawal' symptom from her addiction to spending. I thought Jean made her point clear--get your hair done, but it is coming out of your allowance. Personally, I can't relate to the hair thing, I spend zip for salons, but that suits my job(I wear my hair up, I work in an historical house, most of the time my hair is under a cap--never a bad hair day ) so Lisa has made her decision, just wondering what she plans to cut out in order to get the hair done so perhaps she'll find a way to budget it in--
As for the cars, I think that just because the BMW wasn't mentioned by name, doesn't mean it has made the cut-
I find all the folks involved personable, just having a tough time with their spending addictions, which is to be expected-
Sorry, still don't see why the family is snubbing them. One of my BILs has this problem(though nowhere near this dimension!) & we would not think of cutting them. Yep, it is mega frustrating at times, but we are here for them--with anything but $$ or a co-sign & they have never asked for either. I do know that in my family member's state, if my relative was to divorce she'd still be saddled with the spendthrift's debts, even though he makes far more $$ than she does. she loves him, but hopes she dies first I'm not kidding, it's what she's said--
Can't see how both families managed to get by without being foreclosed upon, or how they obtain credit. both should have declared bankruptcy before the laws changed. How can they even raise their FICO scores? why didn't all their debts show up in their credit reports?

Jean

 

[dvcgirl]

I really didn't look at Lisa's confrontation with Jean, in the salon, as a temper tantrum or anything ugly--uncomfortable--definitely--but she didn't get nasty. I simply thought of it as another 'withdrawal' symptom from her addiction to spending. I thought Jean made her point clear--get your hair done, but it is coming out of your allowance. Personally, I can't relate to the hair thing, I spend zip for salons, but that suits my job(I wear my hair up, I work in an historical house, most of the time my hair is under a cap--never a bad hair day ) so Lisa has made her decision, just wondering what she plans to cut out in order to get the hair done so perhaps she'll find a way to budget it in--
As for the cars, I think that just because the BMW wasn't mentioned by name, doesn't mean it has made the cut-
I find all the folks involved personable, just having a tough time with their spending addictions, which is to be expected-
Sorry, still don't see why the family is snubbing them. One of my BILs has this problem(though nowhere near this dimension!) & we would not think of cutting them. Yep, it is mega frustrating at times, but we are here for them--with anything but $$ or a co-sign & they have never asked for either. I do know that in my family member's state, if my relative was to divorce she'd still be saddled with the spendthrift's debts, even though he makes far more $$ than she does. she loves him, but hopes she dies first I'm not kidding, it's what she's said--
Can't see how both families managed to get by without being foreclosed upon, or how they obtain credit. both should have declared bankruptcy before the laws changed. How can they even raise their FICO scores? why didn't all their debts show up in their credit reports?

Jean

But here's the thing. Lisa Bradley couldn't afford the "hair thing" if she had *no* consumer debt. Not making the amount of money that they make. $625 a month ($7500 a year) on hair is just not doable for a family making $102,000 a year. Yes, perhaps that would be a reasonable monthly spending allowance (meaning all fun spending) for someone making 100K a year living in a modest home (which they aren't doing), driving modest cars (which they aren't doing), meeting retirement savings goals (not happening) and with no consumer debt (heh)....but they fit none of the above criteria.

I understand that the concept behind the show is to show viewers how to get rid of debt by coming up with a plan. Unfortunately, for the Oprah show, they chose poorly when they went with The Bradleys. They were obviously going for "wow" factor there, but I don't think that they really looked at the "liklihood to succeed" factor. There is *NO WAY*, that the Bradleys will get out of debt by returning a couple of cable boxes, turning in a car and cutting back on salon visits. They are in way too deep for that. So far, Jean Chatsky has cut maybe....$12,000 to $15,000 a year off of their "budget" which would include the car that went back, the TV, the piano, cutting back cable and the cell phone bill. They are over 200K deep in consumer debt. So, with 185K to go....all likely at very high interest rates....well, unless they file for bankruptcy protection, I don't see how they'll make it.

 

[Alicnwondrln]

it would sad if oprah baile dout either of these families
they dont seem to deserve the hlp they are getting as they dont appreciate it
they are cheating already and im sorry but oprah defending the woman s hair really amde me be like WHAT oprah is nuts if she thinks it ok

 

[Free4Life11]

Did anyone else notice that during the "DEBT DIET" that they ran upcoming preview of a Marc Jacobs dresses and Jimmy Choo shoes. I found that rather tactless of the producers.

Yep I saw that and thought it was ironic.

I guess I'll be the lone voice here and say I was impressed by the families. After seeing the first episode I was outraged, but I think both families DID make quite a few changes considering this was only their first week. It is NOT easy to change your habits or attitudes, as outrageous as they may be to everyone else. It certainly wont happen over night. I also don't think self-control and frugality (and even living within your means to an extent) are just "common sense," rather things you learn as you mature and unfortunantely not everyone learns them.

There is NO WAY they will get rid of this debt overnight, there is no quick fix, so I think making changes slowly and building up is one way to do it and I think that is the way

There is no right way to pay down debt. When you are working with people who have little self-control (and yes I beleive self-control is learned not just common sense) then I don't think your can move in and change them 180 degrees overnight. I think THAT would be dooming them to failure.

Do I think they'll make it? I have no idea. I do know they are getting great help, but it's too early to tell. I am NOT throwing in the towel though I mean good grief, it's just been one week.

Everyone keeps saying they are clueless -- they ARE, which is why they came on national TV to get help. I certainly wouldn't air my "dirty laundry" for the whole world to see.

ITA, Mickeyfan. I also think Oprah is going to be paying for Lisa Bradleys hair salon appointments. I can hardly wait to see all the gifts she's going to be giving these families for being such good sports for going on her show.

Dang, if I went on Oprah I know I'd want some gifts! Especially if I went on and told the whole world I'm in incredible debt.

Also, I don't know if you saw the preview for upcoming episode, but it does look like Lisa Bradely has some "issues," which can't say surprises me!

As far as haircuts, I bought a clipper and shaved my head off for nine months -- it looked TERRIBLE. The entire time I thought it looked good then one day it dawned on me that I looked horrible and I'm never going back! I figure I spend about $17 (tip included) every 4 weeks on a haircut.

 

[Kay7979]

I understand that the concept behind the show is to show viewers how to get rid of debt by coming up with a plan. Unfortunately, for the Oprah show, they chose poorly when they went with The Bradleys. They were obviously going for "wow" factor there, but I don't think that they really looked at the "liklihood to succeed" factor.

Not only is the liklihood to succeed factor a problem, but to me, they aren't a family most people can relate to. I think Oprah runs the risk of people saying "Gee, we're in pretty good shape compared to them, so I guess we're not doing so bad!" Furthermore, she would have been better off to use a couple making something more in line with the median income, maybe 60-70K, who had a more normal set of expenses (not 5 cars and a very upscale home). More people could relate to that. I imagine there are a lot of people watching Oprah who can't relate to making over 100K, and who think that the lifestyle portrayed by the Bradleys should have been doable on that income. I don't think there is anywhere in the US where the cost of living is low enough to support the Bradleys lifestyle on anywhere near 100K. So yes, I think Oprah was shooting for the "wow" factor to make people tune in, more than she was trying to portray the "typical 70% of American families" who have problems with debt.

 

[dvcgirl]

Not only is the liklihood to succeed factor a problem, but to me, they aren't a family most people can relate to. I think Oprah runs the risk of people saying "Gee, we're in pretty good shape compared to them, so I guess we're not doing so bad!" Furthermore, she would have been better off to use a couple making something more in line with the median income, maybe 60-70K, who had a more normal set of expenses (not 5 cars and a very upscale home). More people could relate to that. I imagine there are a lot of people watching Oprah who can't relate to making over 100K, and who think that the lifestyle portrayed by the Bradleys should have been doable on that income. I don't think there is anywhere in the US where the cost of living is low enough to support the Bradleys lifestyle on anywhere near 100K. So yes, I think Oprah was shooting for the "wow" factor to make people tune in, more than she was trying to portray the "typical 70% of American families" who have problems with debt.

I agree, not many can relate to The Bradleys. And I have to be honest, they've been positively villified in the process. People on the oprah.com boards have little sympathy for that lot, and we don't seem to have much over here either. In the end, I think that perhaps there's hope for Lisa Bradley to come out of it as a better person, but to go through that in front on millions and millions of people. Well, clearly, I don't think she thought through the implications of that. She mentioned that "looking the part" was important to her, but I think she's learning very quickly that "looking the part" only "works" when people haven't seen the skeletons in the closet. And Lisa Bradley has a graveyard full of skeletons in her closet. And now everyone knows it. People won't envy her life now, they'll look at her like she's a fool.

Even though the other two families are making 75K-92K, I think many, many families will be able to relate to them. I agree though, it would have been useful for the Oprah folks to show a family closer to that medican income range....

 

[mskani]

I watched both episodes of the show and I agree--both families need a lot of help. Both have some serious issues re: keeping up appearances.

The Bradley Family:
I think that Mrs. Bradley feels by having things, it makes her a better person. Five cars is ridiculous! Leasing tv equipment is crazy! (I'm assuming that is why they were able to give it back so easily). A 50" tv in your living room AND no groceries in your kitchen is CRAZY! $100/day fast food budget is CRAZY (unless you're on vacation )

Now, I'm going to address the hair issue. For those of you who do not know, many black women have chemically treated hair that must be maintained by a professional. Now having said that, I still do not know how she is spending $150/week to get her hair done!! My dd and I get our hair done every two weeks (come rain, shine, snow, etc.) I even calculated if I went to the shop once a week, I still would not spend as much as she does. My guess is that she is having other services done (manicure, pedicure, waxing, massage, etc). My suggestion would be for her to cut the salon trips down to twice per month (sorry but chemically treated hair has to be done every two weeks). My dh suggested that she find a new stylist--but that's easier said than done. It is hard to start all over with a new stylist. But I would suggest that she try to get some type of discount from her current stylist. As much business as she gives her, it wouldn't hurt to ask.

The other family (can't think of their last name):
Their thinking was skewed as well--they would go to pay day loan stores to get advances on a regular basis and have not paid their 2nd mortgage in 14 months!! What really surprised me was that the 2nd family hosted this weekly dinner for friends and family complete with Italian beef sandwiches, beer, etc. That is EXPENSIVE!! Using bill money to buy jeans for her daughter because she really really wanted them (even though she had other perfectly good jeans in her closet)

I will say that this Oprah episode has caused a lot of people (myself included) to look at their lives a little more closely and re-examine what is really important. Personally I wouldn't be able to sleep at night if I had all of those bills piled up in a cabinet in a basket; but I know that this is a reality for a lot of people regardless of what their salary is. I am now reading TMMO and I am going to implement some of his ideas. My goal is to become debt free (except for my mortgage) within 18 months.