Has anyone every done a birthday registry?

[Mickeys.friend]

Never...too tacky not to mention uppity! What you do between family is different, but to add registry info on invitations for kids,etc....just eeeew!

 

[Mickeys.friend]

oops double post!

 

[Bren's Mom]

Agreed. I keep a combined wishlist for both kids on Amazon. I do it more so that anyone looking at their birthday or Christmas lists can see a picture of what they want. If you know nothing about Hannah Montana & your granddaughter, who lives in another state, has asked for a Hannah Montana doll, having a picture can help a lot.
And, BTW, both sides ask for birthday & Christmas lists.

I would never send it out to school friends for their birthdays but for family its invaluable IMO.

I agree too. In general I think ALL registries are tacky, including wedding ones. But I'm not offended that my SIL, who has 4 kids, will allow her children to add to their 'wish list' on Amazon and it's public so any of the aunts/uncles/grandparents can read it if we're looking for ideas for her kids. She doesn't offer the info but if asked will say that their wish lists are on Amazon and it makes it sooooo easy for me! I don't see how that's any different then supplying a family member with a list of things the kids might like if asked for one. I wouldn't personally ever put registry or wish list info on an invite.

 

[JacobsMommy11002]

Another one here who thinks it is tacky...however, I also think adding "So and so is registered at..." in shower invites is tacky, too.

 

[r4blessings]

I also keep a wish list for our family on Amazon. My sister lives in NYC and is single and comes out for all our birthdays and Christmases on the train, so lugging large gifts for the kiddies isn't an option, plus she is an avid online shopper, so she always asks me to send her a link for something to get my kiddies. I don't think anyone but me views the list, but when she asks, I email her a link to a gift the kids would like. She is able to be the "cool" aunt who knows exactly what they want, and she has it shipped to me, I wrap it and she just shows up to the party or for Christmas!

My mother also always asks for a link b/s she will go to the store usually and buy it, but like a pp mentioned she really needs the picture to know what she is looking for! So I might send her a link from amazon, and then she would go to target or tru and buy it there.

But I don't typically let anyone know what they want, unless asked, and even then its just close, close family and friends.

Except for the year I had a "bitty baby baby shower" themed party for dd and then she got all baby doll stuff for her new bitty baby, but I didn't register at AG or anything.

 

[littlele]

A question for all of those who consider this so tacky......(and a sincere question, not mockery)

My example: Around Christmas time, which also happens to be DD's birthday, the grandparents, aunts/uncles, etc. ask what DD would like. I tell them she really doesn't need anything, but they insist (especially Grandma!) on a list so they can be sure to get something she likes and not waste money on other things. So DD makes a wishlist/registry online. I, of course, would never give this info out to anyone besides those who really want it.

So the question is, why is this so tacky? They've asked for the info, we gave it to them. What am I missing?

 

[DiznEeyore]

A question for all of those who consider this so tacky......(and a sincere question, not mockery)

My example: Around Christmas time, which also happens to be DD's birthday, the grandparents, aunts/uncles, etc. ask what DD would like. I tell them she really doesn't need anything, but they insist (especially Grandma!) on a list so they can be sure to get something she likes and not waste money on other things. So DD makes a wishlist/registry online. I, of course, would never give this info out to anyone besides those who really want it.

So the question is, why is this so tacky? They've asked for the info, we gave it to them. What am I missing?

IMHO, the difference here is that the *giver* is asking for guidance, not being given a list up-front of what the giftee wants to receive. It's just better etiquette.

 

[meandtheguys2]

When the relatives ask us, we give general ideas. Not tell them to buy a particular item. Gifts are supposed to be from the heart, not the checkbook. There is nothing of the giver in a gift like that.

 

[mjantz]

When the relatives ask us, we give general ideas. Not tell them to buy a particular item. Gifts are supposed to be from the heart, not the checkbook. There is nothing of the giver in a gift like that.

I never, ever say 'You must buy this'. My lists (which I am asked for) usually look like this:

DD

-Singing Hannah Montana Doll (check Amazon list for a picture)
-Barbie in the Nutcracker DVD
-Hannah Montana clothes (she wears about a size 8/can find at Dillards or Wal-Mart/ she likes the shirts with the long fingerless gloves)
-High School Musical or High School Musical 2 CD or DVD

She likes: Hello Kitty, Barbie, Disney Princesses, Ballet, Hannah Montana, Bindi the Jungle Girl, art stuff and Babymouse

She could use: New PJs (size 8) and new socks for school

So, they can get something from off the list, they can get something she'd like or they can just get her some Hello Kitty PJs & its all good. I don't care what they get but they want to get the right thing & I am happy to help them make their grandkids smile on their birthdays or Christmas morning.

 

[carmie3377]

I think a wish list is fine so if a loved one asks what your child likes, just refer them to the wish list. However, to register and include on invites, ect, is rude. People feel obligate to get what is on the wish list and perhaps it is more than they can spend. Or maybe they can only buy at specific stores because that is where they have available credit (my mom is one of those people).

 

[meandtheguys2]

I never, ever say 'You must buy this'. My lists (which I am asked for) usually look like this:

DD

-Singing Hannah Montana Doll (check Amazon list for a picture)
-Barbie in the Nutcracker DVD
-Hannah Montana clothes (she wears about a size 8/can find at Dillards or Wal-Mart/ she likes the shirts with the long fingerless gloves)
-High School Musical or High School Musical 2 CD or DVD

She likes: Hello Kitty, Barbie, Disney Princesses, Ballet, Hannah Montana, Bindi the Jungle Girl, art stuff and Babymouse

She could use: New PJs (size 8) and new socks for school

So, they can get something from off the list, they can get something she'd like or they can just get her some Hello Kitty PJs & its all good. I don't care what they get but they want to get the right thing & I am happy to help them make their grandkids smile on their birthdays or Christmas morning.

HUH? I was responding to the post asking what the diff was? My opinion. It is also my opinion that one might as well buy the stuff oneself if one is telling others what to get. Otherwise, there is nothing of the giver involved except money. nothing personal...

 

[It's A Happy Day]

I never, ever say 'You must buy this'. My lists (which I am asked for) usually look like this:

DD

-Singing Hannah Montana Doll (check Amazon list for a picture)
-Barbie in the Nutcracker DVD
-Hannah Montana clothes (she wears about a size 8/can find at Dillards or Wal-Mart/ she likes the shirts with the long fingerless gloves)
-High School Musical or High School Musical 2 CD or DVD

She likes: Hello Kitty, Barbie, Disney Princesses, Ballet, Hannah Montana, Bindi the Jungle Girl, art stuff and Babymouse

She could use: New PJs (size 8) and new socks for school

So, they can get something from off the list, they can get something she'd like or they can just get her some Hello Kitty PJs & its all good. I don't care what they get but they want to get the right thing & I am happy to help them make their grandkids smile on their birthdays or Christmas morning.

ITA!!! While I do not include a "my kid is registered at" in any invitation to family or friends both of my kids (as I posted previously) are registered with wish lists on Amazon. IF someone asks and wants more specifics other than oh she likes Strawberry Shortcake or he's into Transformers then I will let them know that they both have wish lists posted. A wish list is exactly that...specific items they "wish" to have, not necessarily "are" getting. It is a huge help to distant relatives or relatives we don't see that often or friends who know that yes, DS is into transformers BUT he has sooooo many that they do not want to buy a duplicate item. With todays pain in the @** return policies - must have receipt, only have so many days to bring back, needs to go back on whatever form of payment it was orginally purchased in, it now clearanced so cheaper than when purchased, etc. I would rather get something off a list or asked for by parent/child than worry that it got regifted, donated, etc. I think that it's smart to have some type of list for people to refer to if they would like that option - again not forced on someone by including in an invite but upon request. In general I don't have a problem with wedding or baby registries.

 

[cnj]

I think for family, it would be fine. For a child's birthday party with other kids, though, soooooooooo tacky.

 

[Mike N Kathy]

As far as my family is concerned we always give out lists *WE* and I like to buy what people actually want regardless if its a 1.00 item or 100.00 item ...For example my nephews bday is next week they gave us a list we bought what was on the list... b/c i have a daughter and quite frankly i dont know what an 8 year old boy wants. As far as people saying its tacky thats ridiculous whats more ridiculous is wasting your money on something thats going to be flung in the garbage... I think you should make the wish list if anyone asks u can tell them about the list... If they dont ask then dont tell them about it simple as that.

 

[branv]

Wish lists fine, registries, ugh tacky. I have this image of a little 7 year old running around with the scanner going "want that! *zap* want that! *zap*" and then getting upset when they don't get thisthatandeverything. Or worse, doing the blunt kid thing and saying "I didn't ask for that!!" in front of everyone.

However, I think wish lists are for families -- who we know well and whose reasoning we understand. Example: I live far away from my neices, and sometimes only see them 3x a year. In that time their likes change so much, and most of all, their SIZES skyrocket every time I blink. I can't always keep up as much as I would like to every little detail (ex: at Christmas my niece desperately wanted Pokeman stuff. When I visited them last month I asked her if she wanted Pokeman for her birthday and she scrunched up her face and said, "not really." Go figure. So every christmas I ask my sister if there is anything they asked Santa for and sis sends me a small list. I always get them something off the list, and something small I picked out.

But the truth is, we all know it's easy to say something is all bad or all good when we're talking abstractly. Honestly, if we have a dear giving friend with a sweet child who puts together a registry, even those of us who are anti-registry will say, "Oh I know her, she's just trying to make this easy on people who are looking for gift ideas." But if it's someone we tend to think of a greedy/graspy...well, you know what we'll think of them.

So I guess my real answer is, "it depends." But I would never EVER sanctify advertising any kind of list that is not solicited.

 

[JacobsMommy11002]

When the relatives ask us, we give general ideas. Not tell them to buy a particular item. Gifts are supposed to be from the heart, not the checkbook. There is nothing of the giver in a gift like that.

I agree...and this is the main reason I detest exchanging gifts with adults. Its all "What do you want...ok, well, what do you want" Then we go out and buy each other something. Half the time you have to think to come up with an idea. Its not about giving anymore....its more of a chore. I'd rather can the whole thing altogether. Kids, they are different..but my kids are THRILLED whenever they recieve a gift...if its something they asked for or not. The things mine love the most are the things they never would have thought to ask for. And if they get a duplicate and can't return it, they love donating it to kids who don't have toys.

 

[bumbershoot]

Just wondering is anyone has ever done a registry for a child's birthday. And if you did How did you let the guests know? The reason I ask is because someone asked if I was going to register somewhere. At first I thought no, but then I checked into it and you can at Target and at Pottery Barn Kids.
Just wondering

Jenny

I have a Wish List on amazon.com for my son, so if anyone ever went looking for it they might find it. And if someone actually asked me what he might like, I'd point them in that direction. But really it's mainly used for ME to remember the things I want to think about getting him.

I think that if you are being asked for this information and you WANT to do it, do it, then give that information solely to the person that asked you.

 

[northcapemaymom]

El tacky-o! To the casual acquaintence or school friend it definitely looks like solicitation for a gift. I'd be the type of person who purposely wouldn't buy from the registry. To me it resembles social blackmail. "You buy this gift I've chosen and in return you get cake and a goodie bag." Nada. It takes away from giving from the heart, IMHO.

 

[meandtheguys2]

I agree...and this is the main reason I detest exchanging gifts with adults. Its all "What do you want...ok, well, what do you want" Then we go out and buy each other something. Half the time you have to think to come up with an idea. Its not about giving anymore....its more of a chore. I'd rather can the whole thing altogether. Kids, they are different..but my kids are THRILLED whenever they recieve a gift...if its something they asked for or not. The things mine love the most are the things they never would have thought to ask for. And if they get a duplicate and can't return it, they love donating it to kids who don't have toys.

I agree. I expect my kids to be grateful regardless. We would have missed out on so many awesome things/experiences if we told people exactly what we wanted.

 

[katerkat]

Ditto. To me it implies that you are expecting a gift & you don't trust anyone to have good judgement when choosing one.

Sometimes, I think my friends are in a competition to get the most obnoxious toy ever for my kid. Not that a registry would stop them, but...

I have a perpetual list on findgift.com. I like findgift because you can add a link or just a general description. For example, Russ loves his wooden trains, so I wrote that he wants "wooden train stuff, we have a lot of track but not many accessories, Imaginarium, Brio and Thomas stuff is compatible, IKEA is not." That way people have a general idea of what to look for. Only relatives have the link - I didn't include it on his recent birthday invites. If someone asks what he wants, I just say he has a list on findgift.