Cheerfully child-free. Anyone else?

[PhotobearSam]

On another note:
I am a little ticked that people with kids are going to $300 more than me with the gov't rebate checks that are coming. Why should they get more than me??

I don't know...Maybe it's Danger Pay

 

[jenm2878]

I asked the same question about why people with kids are getting more over on one of the rebate threads and got my head taken off and was told I was begrudging children. I got fed some line about how I only have to pay for me and my DH while they have to pay for two kids as well. Um, not my problem. You CHOSE to have kids therefore limiting your discretionary income. I CHOSE to be CF (at least for now) so they shouldn't begrudge me the money I don't spend on diapers and such.

 

[Dee & Greg]

I work in advertising for a newspaper, so it's a regular 40 hr work week, unless I have something special going to press.
I used to have a BIG TIME JOB that required me to travel hours on a plane (in a suit and heels no less!), attend meetings until all hours, etc. I made awesome $$$ and thought I wanted a high stress job with big bucks since I didn't have kids... but I also didn't have a brain left. Great thing about being over 40... you don't have much trouble saying "buh bye" to a job that just doesn't fit your lifestyle anymore. Another good thing about being 45? No one asks when DH (50) and I are going to have kids!!
In fact, we're now debating over whether to use our 40% off Disney special, or book a last-minute cruise to San Juan in Feb... decisions, decisions!

 

[MELSMICE]

I asked the same question about why people with kids are getting more over on one of the rebate threads and got my head taken off and was told I was begrudging children. I got fed some line about how I only have to pay for me and my DH while they have to pay for two kids as well. Um, not my problem. You CHOSE to have kids therefore limiting your discretionary income. I CHOSE to be CF (at least for now) so they shouldn't begrudge me the money I don't spend on diapers and such.

I don't claim to know everything about the tax credits, but the way it was explained to me was that you can receive up to $300 per child that you have or claim a deduction for.

If you do not have children then you don't have any deductions for them, therefore, are not eligible to receive the tax refund credit.

Why should someone that doesn't have the deduction receive the tax credit refund for a child?

 

[jenm2878]

I don't claim to know everything about the tax credits, but the way it was explained to me was that you can receive up to $300 per child that you have or claim a deduction for.

If you do not have children then you don't have any deductions for them, therefore, are not eligible to receive the tax refund credit.

Why should someone that doesn't have the deduction receive the tax credit refund for a child?

I was just venting about the other thread. My complaint was not that *I* don't get the same deductions/extra $. I was irritated because someone over there said that they deserve more because they have more expenses then the childfree. That may or may not be true. It's the semantics that's annoying me. It's supposedly a tax rebate but you don't necessarily have to have paid in tax. You'll get $300 per kid, but you may not have paid in tax in the first place due to the different deductions due to having kids. Someone with 5 kids may get $1500 back for their kids, but their original tax liabilty may have been $0 to begin with. Not really a tax rebate then.

I'm going to drop it (from all threads) because I don't think I'm explaining myself very well.

 

[goofygirl]

I was just venting about the other thread. My complaint was not that *I* don't get the same deductions/extra $. I was irritated because someone over there said that they deserve more because they have more expenses then the childfree. That may or may not be true. It's the semantics that's annoying me. It's supposedly a tax rebate but you don't necessarily have to have paid in tax. You'll get $300 per kid, but you may not have paid in tax in the first place due to the different deductions due to having kids. Someone with 5 kids may get $1500 back for their kids, but their original tax liabilty may have been $0 to begin with. Not really a tax rebate then.

I'm going to drop it (from all threads) because I don't think I'm explaining myself very well.

I totally get your explanation!

I don't really expect MELSMICE to agree with us, since she is not CF.

 

[MELSMICE]

I totally get your explanation!

I don't really expect MELSMICE to agree with us, since she is not CF.

It has nothing to do with being childfree or having children. It's a tax credit & the government says you can get up to $300 per child. I find your comment insulting.

jenm2878 - Like you, I disagree with the poster that said because you have children you necessarily have more expenses & should receive more in the way of a tax credit. That's not always the case.

I'm just basing my opinion/post on what the government is saying is offered. Not to mention, because of income levels, I may not even be eligible for the tax credit anyway, regardless of how many children I have.

Personally, I think a tax credit/rebate should somehow relate to how much you pay into taxes to begin with.

 

[jenm2878]

It has nothing to do with being childfree or having children. It's a tax credit & the government says you can get up to $300 per child. I find your comment insulting.

jenm2878 - Like you, I disagree with the poster that said because you have children you necessarily have more expenses & should receive more in the way of a tax credit. That's not always the case.

I'm just basing my opinion/post on what the government is saying is offered. Not to mention, because of income levels, I may not even be eligible for the tax credit anyway, regardless of how many children I have.

Personally, I think a tax credit/rebate should somehow relate to how much you pay into taxes to begin with.[/QUOTE]

I agree with you entirely, and that was all I was trying to get across. I think the credit is a bad idea anyway, but I won't turn down the money. My irritation isn't with people that will take the extra money (I would too), but the government's logic behind it.

I was just annoyed that someone told me I didn't understand because I only have DH and my mouths to feed and clothe while they have to feed and clothe kids as well. I just don't understand how that's the government's problem? They chose to have kids just like I've chosen to remain childfree for the time being. It's not the problem of realizing that it costs more to feed 5 then 2, but more of why people they are entitled to more because they chose to have children. Does that make more sense? It's not even a childfree versus having children issue.

 

[MELSMICE]

I was just annoyed that someone told me I didn't understand because I only have DH and my mouths to feed and clothe while they have to feed and clothe kids as well. I just don't understand how that's the government's problem? They chose to have kids just like I've chosen to remain childfree for the time being. It's not the problem of realizing that it costs more to feed 5 then 2, but more of why people they are entitled to more because they chose to have children. Does that make more sense? It's not even a childfree versus having children issue.

I completely understand what you're saying. You may be paying twice as much in taxes as they are, however, they are receiving more just because they have children.

I will not turn down any refund the government gives either & I do think their system is somewhat flawed. Like I previously posted, it seems that the tax rebate should be based on what is paid out in taxes - not the number of people in your household or that you claim as dependents.

Oh well...............any rebate I receive will be a nice addition to my "Disney fund".

 

[LisaZee]

We had kind of a sucky year, so I am totally gonna take the cash. DH lost not one but two jobs, and Zoe was really sick with what we thought was FIP.(Thankfully, she is symptom free - but weeks of lab work and meds cost over $1000.) Plus, DH and I are standing up in my brother's wedding in May (wow, that could be a whole thread in itself!) so those expenses are adding up.

I have been trying to follow the other tax rebate thread, and all it did was aggravate me. What I had a problem with was the throwing around of the term "welfare" for those of us poor saps that make under $150k. Ugh. But dude, call it what you want, I'm taking it! I have a 12 year old car that has no air, no heat, no traction control, and headlights that sometimes work and sometimes don't. New Chevy Malibu - you will be mine!

 

[Aunt Michelle]

I understand.

But for me, the "right guy" wouldn't have kids! If he has kids, he's not the right guy. Not right for me, anyway.

I'll be 39 next month, so I guess we are 2 Old Maids, LOL!

Just an observation- I think it's kind of funny that a "Parent Thread" was started on the DIS, I mean aren't about half the threads already "parent threads" in one way or another?

We're still the lone CF thread

Goofygirl -

I see a "girls only" Disney vacation in our future! I am the actual sterotype... 39, single, and 3 CATS! Even in this year of 2008, society, as a whole, still sees something "wrong" with single woman > 35, or a married couple who wishes to remain child-free.

Michelle

 

[Aunt Michelle]

Ok gals, I am just catching up!

Lisa, just pull out pictures of your cats when they ask to see your kids' photos! LOL!

You sound all too eager to send your husband off!

Doesn't she though? My idea was that we arrange some sort of "time share"... Each getting him for garbage day??

You know, I rescind my offer til the spring - DH comes in handy to brush the snow off my car during winter in Chicago!

OT - I have a sickness. It is midnight and I have work in the morning, but I am glued to E watching THS - America's Next Top Model... and I have a DVR - why am I still up? ahhh!

I have a question - what kinds of jobs do you all have? Do you work a lot, or put in your 8 hours and leave? Do you feel that you are "expected" to work extra because you don't have a "family" (b.s. by the way - DH and I are a family) or cover for those that have kid commitments? I ask because I am the tech supervisor at a large pharmacy (I have 35 employees) and we are in the middle of a big software conversion. The conversion "team" consists of about 12-15 managers and supevisors, but there are like 3 of us putting in all these extra hours to meet our deadlines. Now, I put in extra because that's what I do, I am expected to work til the work is done and am happy to do it. Most of the time. And I'm lucky because my boss feels the same way even though she has 2 daughters - she's putting in 11 hour days, too. But some of these other people are out the door at 5pm while I'm at work til 8. WTH?

I too, work for a technology company, and I am the furthest to the East on my team. I am also a Salaried employee and we are "expected" to put in 50 - 60 hours a week. I'm hoping that my dedication will result in them approving my education assistance request so I can move forward with getting my MBA.

On another note:
I am a little ticked that people with kids are going to $300 more than me with the gov't rebate checks that are coming. Why should they get more than me??

Oh GG, this is a no win argument. I even lose it at the family brunch table! I fall into a higher tax bracket because I make good money, and pay a ton because I can't figure out why the cats are not dependents.

I was just venting about the other thread. My complaint was not that *I* don't get the same deductions/extra $. I was irritated because someone over there said that they deserve more because they have more expenses then the childfree. That may or may not be true. It's the semantics that's annoying me. It's supposedly a tax rebate but you don't necessarily have to have paid in tax. You'll get $300 per kid, but you may not have paid in tax in the first place due to the different deductions due to having kids. Someone with 5 kids may get $1500 back for their kids, but their original tax liabilty may have been $0 to begin with. Not really a tax rebate then.

I'm going to drop it (from all threads) because I don't think I'm explaining myself very well.

I think you were explaining yourself rather well.

Someone explained it to me this way - the people with 5 kids are far more apt to put the money back into the economy whereas I would be more likely to invest instead of spend. Ha! What they don't realize is that I'd take it straight to WDW!
I agree that if it is a "tax credit/rebate" then everyone who pays taxes should be rebated based on their tax contribution. We all know that a tax rebate is not what it is - it's a BRIBE!

Whew... I think I am caught up.

 

[Aunt Michelle]

Hey? Hello? Anyone out there? I hope everyone's doing ok.

 

[LisaZee]

Hi guys!

I've been at work non-stop this past week and weekend. We had our big software conversion on Friday - I have been putting in 12 and 13 hour days. I am pooped and a little nutty to say the least...

So, here's something to munch on that is related to both Disney and the child-free. My husband tells me that his parents, brother and family (includes SIL and 2 kids) and SIL's parents are all going to WDW in August. They are apparently staying at AKL (not cheap as ya'll know.)

My issue with this is not that we were not invited to go along. A trip with my MIL, FIL, BIL, SIL, DH's young nieces, and SIL's parents is not my idea of any kind of good time. My issue is that MIL spent an hour telling us how she and FIL have no money and couldn't afford to buy us more than a DVD and CD for Xmas because they have all these grandkids to buy for, yet they are going to spend a crud-load of money on this trip with DH's brother's family. We get the big shaft-ola again. You'd think I'd be used to it by now, but it never stops stinging. Thank god my mom is not like this at all, I know we'll never get pushed aside for my brother's kids (when he has them.)

And ok, I AM a little jealous... I want to go to WDW!!!

 

[WDWguru]

Don't be too jealous, LisaZee. They're going in AUGUST! I've been in August and I would go back at that time ever again, even if it WAS free!

 

[jodifla]

Hmm. after reading chunks of this thread thru the years...

DH and I were "cheerfully child free" for 13 years of our marriage (We are just about to celebrate 20 years of marriage). And we enjoyed them and had a great time. Traveled, dinners, etc. etc.

But I hope I was never as negative or as begrudging of families as a lot of these posters on this thread are!

Geez.

 

[WDWguru]

 

[Aunt Michelle]

Hmm. after reading chunks of this thread thru the years...

DH and I were "cheerfully child free" for 13 years of our marriage (We are just about to celebrate 20 years of marriage). And we enjoyed them and had a great time. Traveled, dinners, etc. etc.

But I hope I was never as negative or as begrudging of families as a lot of these posters on this thread are!

Geez.

I applaud you. Unfortunately, some of us have families that make it hard sometimes, and some of us have had very bad years - the kind where everything goes wrong, and some of us just need a place to vent where we can let go of some of the silly stupid things that get to us, and some us need a group of people who understand how we feel when someone says "gee when are you going to have kids?" or "when are you going to settle down?" "What? What do you mean you don't want to, of course, you do!" Finally some of need to know that we can say anything here without being scolded by someone who obviously doesn't understand because they don't know our particular situation. If you have nothing more to contribute than tsk, tsk, you guys are so negative, I was never like you.... please leave us alone.

You're so bad!

 

[LisaZee]

But I hope I was never as negative or as begrudging of families as a lot of these posters on this thread are!

Geez.

We are all part of families - whether "traditional" or not. Each of us is someone's wife, daughter, aunt, niece, godmother, fur-baby parent, etc. Our main focus is just not on children of our own. I'm sure you and DH considered yourself a family, right?

I, for one, am glad to have these ladies on my side. I find it incredible that I can come online to a community of virtual strangers who are more accepting of the choices I have made than some of those in my daily life.

And P.S. I'm not begrudging of families, I begrudge anyone who gets to go to Disney World without me!

 

[goofygirl]

Hmm. after reading chunks of this thread thru the years...

DH and I were "cheerfully child free" for 13 years of our marriage (We are just about to celebrate 20 years of marriage). And we enjoyed them and had a great time. Traveled, dinners, etc. etc.

But I hope I was never as negative or as begrudging of families as a lot of these posters on this thread are!

Geez.

It sounds to me that you've always wanted children but waited 13 years to have them.

Choosing to have children eventually is different than choosing not to have children at all. You are not in the same category as someone who has chosen to never have children at all.

People who chose to be permanently CF face harsher judgement than those who want children someday. You probably have not experienced this judgement.
This is a place where the childfree can come and support each other , and yes, sometimes we vent about the judgements being made against us. If you take our venting as being "negative" or "begrudging", well I'm sorry you feel that way.