After weeks of discussion, debate, frustration and tears, we are cancelling our DFTW .... and moving it to the Swan.
We became so frustrated with the difficulties of getting in touch with our planner, of Disney's rules and restrictions (especially the ones that are only arbitrarily enforced), and a million other little things, that we just gave up. The straw that broke the camel's back was Disney's insistence that we couldn't have our MK session on a Thursday due to EMH (never mind the fact that other girls here on the DIS DO get them on Thursdays even with EMH) and that because of that, our MK session wouldn't count towards our Wishes minimum. They made it impossible for us to do it on the day, and then said it wouldn't count because it wasn't on the day.

Our planner instructed us to email the DFTW director to express our concerns, and we never even got the courtesy of a return call or email.
So, DFTW beat the magic right out of us, and we were going to call everything off. Then the lovely Joanne got me thinking about the possibility of having our VR at the Swan, and as I got in touch with Just Marry, various managers at the Swan, and the manager of the Wave (where we are now having our luncheon after the VR), I received prompt replies, helpful information and generally the kind of stellar service we'd expected but never received from DFTW.
We are now scheduled for 10/27 on Crescent Terrace at the Swan. Hopefully it won't rain, but I'm okay with their Atrium which is the back-up location. We are saving a TON of money, and I'm getting every single little thing my heart desires that we couldn't get and/or afford with DFTW. The only thing we are losing is the MK session, and we're going to do a bridal session at the Studios instead (TOT is my favorite ride and I've seen incredible photos from there lately!). And frankly, DFAP (namely Dara) has been wonderful to work with -- the one shining star of the whole process, so we're happy to still be working with them for the shoot.
So there we are! We still haven't officially cancelled with DFTW because, surprise, surprise, we can't get anyone to call us back!

It will get done this week, though, and even though we're losing our deposit, it makes me feel better to know that they're not getting any more of our money and we're giving it to vendors who actually act like they want and value our business.