12 year olds drinking O'Douls...appropriate?

[Mouse Man]

and



Who cares whether other people agree with your choice?

Would you really not order your kid a drink when you wouldn't have a problem giving them one at home, or not let them have one when people are over though you would if there weren't... just because other people could see and might not approve?

To me, that's odd, to worry about what other people think about your choice that has 0 impact on them.

Well, god forbid, I might come home and find a thread on Dis about me!!

 

[luvmy3]

At the ripe old age of 12, I am going to go out on a limb and guess that it wasn't the kids idea to get a beer like product for the party. I am not opposed to my kids trying some of my alcohol but when planning a party where there will be other kids, my kids beverage suggestion list would be include pink lemonade, soda and water. Can't imagine my kids asking us to pick up a 12 pack of non-alcoholic beer for the party. Hence, I am going to assume this was a parental choice and I am going to stick with the claim that the parents were trying to seem like the cool parents. Most 12 y/o would pick a soda over a couple cans of O'Doul's. Heck, most adults would do the same.

Are you saying that you think the parents went out and purchased the OD specifically so that they could give it to their 12 year old? Thats quite an assumption to make seeing how you don't know these people.
I can come up with a scenerio thats probably more likely, the parents were hosting a party and therefore bought a variety of beverages for their guests. Maybe they worried that people wouldn't want to drink alcohol and drive home so they made sure to offer non-alcoholic beverages like OD. The ds came up and said "hey dad can I have one of those", and dad says "you probably won't like it, but if you want to try it go ahead". So the boy opens it, and probably hates it but doesn't want to prove dad right and he continues to drink it. I think the 12 year wanted to "look cool", much like my 7 year old pretends he is drinking beer when he drinks his rootbeer out of the bottle.

I find it odd that the first assumption would be that the parents want to be cool so they are buying their 12 year old non-alcoholic beer, that would be my last one.

It just looked really odd seeing the kid open a bottle of "beer". We barely know these people so I have no idea if this is a regular thing for them or not. I had no idea DD even noticed it until we got into the car on the way home. Yeah, I was a bit annoyed that DD was sitting there thinking the kid was drinking real beer. I've never seen this before so it was a bit shocking.

I don't worry about my 10 year old that much, its not real beer so I wouldn't be annoyed if he thought it was and asked about it.

 

[LisaR]

I didn't say the kid bought it or had the idea to buy it, though it's possible if he'd had it elsewhere, but the parents could have bought it for some guests who can't have alcohol but want the taste of really bad-tasting beer (which I don't get, personally, but...).

I mean if it was the parents' idea to look cool and he didn't care, why not just give him an actual beer?

We're just guessing here and we don't know what really happened.

1. Parents bought it for others and kid drank it without parent's permission.

2. Parents bought it for others and kid drank it with parent's permission.

3. Parents bought it for their kid at the kid's request.

4. Parents bought it for the kid because they wanted to.

We just don't know. My feeling is that if it was scenario 3 or 4, they are parents that are overindulging their kid and they will be buying the real deal for him when he is 14 or 15. Maybe not but I still stand by the reality that it is VERY unusual to see a 12 y/o walking around a backyard BBQ with a beer product. Nobody would think twice if the kid was drinking a soda. It isn't the norm and it will turn heads. The parents had to know that. Hence, my theory that the parents are trying to come across as the cool parents. YMMV.

 

[luvmy3]

We're just guessing here and we don't know what really happened.

1. Parents bought it for others and kid drank it without parent's permission.

2. Parents bought it for others and kid drank it with parent's permission.

3. Parents bought it for their kid at the kid's request.

4. Parents bought it for the kid because they wanted to.

We just don't know. My feeling is that if it was scenario 3 or 4, they are parents that are overindulging their kid and they will be buying the real deal for him when he is 14 or 15. Maybe not but I still stand by the reality that it is VERY unusual to see a 12 y/o walking around a backyard BBQ with a beer product. Nobody would think twice if the kid was drinking a soda. It isn't the norm and it will turn heads. The parents had to know that. Hence, my theory that the parents are trying to come across as the cool parents. YMMV.

Or maybe the parents don't really care what any judgemental guests will think about whatever legal activity they do in their own home.

 

[DeluxePrincess]

I don't worry about my 10 year old that much, its not real beer so I wouldn't be annoyed if he thought it was and asked about it.

Yes, I can see by your "tag" that it's not really that big of a deal.

 

[Poohforyou]

I wouldn't allow it but now that I'm thinking about it, I used to let my kids drink non-alcoholic sparkling wine on occassions like NYE. So, is there really a difference? Still wouldn't like it

I think there's a big difference. Those sparkling beverages are just apple or grape juice with bubbles. They don't taste like champagne at all. I've had O'Douls and it tastes like beer. I'm fine with giving a kid a taste but I wouldn't be ok with what this child was allowed to have.

 

[luvmy3]

Yes, I can see by your "tag" that it's not really that big of a deal.

Well the tag was taken out of a post that was written in jest, but yes I have a healthy attutude towards alcohol. I don't need to shun my kids from it, and I certainly don't need to shun and protect them from seeing a 12 year old boy drink a non alcoholic beer

 

[Goofyluver]

No. Not appropriate.

That fact that so many folks feel the need to justify and defend says that much as well.

 

[cornflake]

No. Not appropriate.

That fact that so many folks feel the need to justify and defend says that much as well.

Wait, what?

You "feel the need" to decry and condemn it.

That people disagree with you proves you to be correct? What?

Is this the new "they're just jealous"?

 

[luvmy3]

No. Not appropriate.

That fact that so many folks feel the need to justify and defend says that much as well.

Actually nobody is "defending" anything, just giving reasons why there isn't anything wrong with it. All I see from the other side is "its not appropriate" or "not in my house", or "its just parents wanting to appear cool". Haven't seen a single valid reason to back up why its really inappropriate.

 

[Kae]

Well, considering it taste like freaking **** without benefit, I would have to wonder why they were allowing this. If my kids were begging to taste my beer, I let them have a taste and they didn't want any more..lol. I see O'Douls as something for recovering alcoholics or the sort. I don't want my 12year to get accustomed to the taste...just strange.

Really, I do not know any Recovering Alcoholic who drinks any N/A type Beer or wine.


Kae

 

[Tiger926]

Because it was one very questionable study that you cite as if it's mountains of research? As I recall, it didn't even say what you thought it did, but I don't remember that well.

Nope, never said mountains of research. Just mentioned the study, and the fact that further research is being done to see whether it's valid or not.

Let us not forget that even "1" study can be taken seriously. Shall I remind you of the vaccine-autism link? That was a bad study, that was also taken seriously, and despite evidence to the contrary, people took it seriously, so in this case, they can further study, and see if it's valid or not, before they make an exact connection between parental alcohol attitudes and underage drinkers.

So, even 1 study can be taken seriously, and it's not fair to just throw this study out, just because it's 1 study. Perhaps it will open the doors to a new area of research, or, they will find that it's bogus, just like the vaccine-autism link.

Tiger

 

[dngnb8]

We were invited to a cookout today hosted by one of DH's coworkers. When we arrived, his 12 year old son was sitting around drinking O'Douls. It really took me by surprise. I know this drink is non-alcoholic, but I've never seen it served to kids before. Am I a prude for finding this odd?

The drink still has alcohol. Its considered non-alcoholic by content.

I am not a fan of this practice

 

[Tiger926]

The drink still has alcohol. Its considered non-alcoholic by content.

I am not a fan of this practice

That is exactly my point. It's the whole practice and tone of it. I'm sure there is an element of coolness to it. Why not put that drink in a regular cup? I suspect because the kid wanted people to see him drinking that particular product.

It's just like the whole coffee cup phenomenon - there are teachers I know who don't even drink their coffee, they just need to be seen holding the Tim Horton's or Starbucks' cup, and each day, they pour out wasted coffee down the sink. I say to them, why not bring your own from home, in your insulated cup, and they say they can't, because it has to be one of those cups.

I wonder if the kid actually drank it, or just held the can to look cool and fit in with the adults?

Tiger

 

[cornflake]

Nope, never said mountains of research. Just mentioned the study, and the fact that further research is being done to see whether it's valid or not.

Let us not forget that even "1" study can be taken seriously. Shall I remind you of the vaccine-autism link? That was a bad study, that was also taken seriously, and despite evidence to the contrary, people took it seriously, so in this case, they can further study, and see if it's valid or not, before they make an exact connection between parental alcohol attitudes and underage drinkers.

So, even 1 study can be taken seriously, and it's not fair to just throw this study out, just because it's 1 study. Perhaps it will open the doors to a new area of research, or, they will find that it's bogus, just like the vaccine-autism link.

Tiger

You said -

All of the new studies that are coming out, are showing that parents who let their kids drink at home, are having many problems with those same kids binge drinking and driving while drunk.

Considering you're talking about ONE study that doesn't seem to show what you think it does and was questionable regardless, iirc, citing "all the new studies" that "are showing" something seems to me like you're claiming mountains of research that doesn't exist. Again iirc, you did the same thing in the other thread, claimed there were lots of studies and then provided links to a bunch of articles, all citing the same single study.

I can't quite believe you just cited bogus research that caused ridiculous problems over years and years as a suggestion that we take this study seriously, but...

No, one study doesn't deserve too much attention, because it's one study. That's why research is published, so it can be followed up.

The vaccine paper was a bogus deal. Regardless, it was just one thing and, as actual scientists said at the time, it shouldn't have been given much shrift - same as any scientist will tell you about nearly any stand-alone paper. That people did is evidence of the influence of the media and general ignorance of many people.

So no, we shouldn't take this one study really seriously, though it didn't suggest it should be taken seriously to begin with.

 

[Art 1]

No. Not appropriate.

That fact that so many folks feel the need to justify and defend says that much as well.

I concur.

 

[LisaR]

Or maybe the parents don't really care what any judgemental guests will think about whatever legal activity they do in their own home.

When does something go from an opinion to judgmental? Because my opinion is different from the parents in question or your own belief means I am judgmental?? Is one not allowed to express their opinion? If I agree, it is an opinion, if I disagree, it is judgmental? It is a message board where one is expressing opinions on a subject. I am not at the party shouting from the rooftops that they are horrible parents. I am on a message board saying that I think they are overindulging their kid. Call out the judgment police.

 

[SmallWorld71]

Really, I do not know any Recovering Alcoholic who drinks any N/A type Beer or wine.


Kae

I do. Although that's neither here nor there.

And, in an informal poll of the DS12's friends parents, it is unanimous that it is inappropriate. And, nobody cares if it was the parents idea or the kids. But, maybe we're all wrong and we should be encouraging our kids to develop a taste for beer.

 

[tasha99]

The parents probably bought ODouls for a non-drinking guest, and the kid wondered what it tasted like.

It's weird if the kid liked it, but I'd allow it for a special occasion (but then, I allow my young teens to have a sip of beer/wine and my college age kids under 21 to actually drink at home.) Now, if the kid started regularly requesting it, I'd say no, just because I'm not getting into the habit of buying it. I do think an ODouls is probably no less healthy than a large glass of Coke.

 

[Tiger926]

You said -



Considering you're talking about ONE study that doesn't seem to show what you think it does and was questionable regardless, iirc, citing "all the new studies" that "are showing" something seems to me like you're claiming mountains of research that doesn't exist. Again iirc, you did the same thing in the other thread, claimed there were lots of studies and then provided links to a bunch of articles, all citing the same single study.

I can't quite believe you just cited bogus research that caused ridiculous problems over years and years as a suggestion that we take this study seriously, but...

No, one study doesn't deserve too much attention, because it's one study. That's why research is published, so it can be followed up.

The vaccine paper was a bogus deal. Regardless, it was just one thing and, as actual scientists said at the time, it shouldn't have been given much shrift - same as any scientist will tell you about nearly any stand-alone paper. That people did is evidence of the influence of the media and general ignorance of many people.

So no, we shouldn't take this one study really seriously, though it didn't suggest it should be taken seriously to begin with.

Sorry, I didn't realize I said studies...didn't realize I was being graded. Sorry about that.

I don't want you to take the study seriously based on the autism study. My point was that even 1 study can be looked at in order to see if further research is warranted. Had they just ignored the autism study, then that would have been a positive outcome, as the whole study caused a lot of serious issues, but what if it the evidence had been the opposite - what if there truly was a vaccine-autism link, but they threw it out because only 1 study had been conducted?

I was just saying in my opinion, it's not fair to totally disregard further look into a study only because it stands alone. Lots of stand alone studies led to further and greater research. Perhaps this one will, or, it will be deemed bogus like the autism study. None of us will ever know if we don't give it a fair chance in proving itself.

And in the mental health world of addiction research and journals that I subscribe to, they are taking it seriously in that they want follow up research done, in order to see if parental attitudes towards substances has an effect on underage substance usage. When it came out, I have multiple emails and newsletters that day mentioning that particular study, as it's a very interesting theory. No one is saying change your parenting and screaming from the rooftops that this study is the end all and be all, just saying that further research needs to be conducted.

Now, this is all a moot point if you don't believe in studies, but for me, I do believe in studies, and am looking forward to seeing what further evidence suggests on this topic.

Tiger