Would you let your SON dress up as a princess at Disney?

[AlwaysMoving]

I think it's great that everyone says they'd stand up to rude people, and the blogger was proud her son wore the girl costume. But at what expense? Kids can see when they're being made fun of, and by then, it's too late. Sure, his mom stands up for him and shuts people up, but the damage is already done. People are cruel, pure and simple. Why tempt it and let someone hurt his feelings at that age? When he's older and wants to defend himself, great, but at such a young age with tender feelings, I just wouldn't want to let complete strangers ruin his fun.

Damage can only happen if you are weak and allow it to happen. I believe that a person should be able to express themselves in a manner that is true to who they are. My son wanted to be a ballet dancer from an early age. I prepared him for what he might encounter and encouraged him on the best ways to not let the feelings of others interfere with his dreams. He encountered all the possible ridicule a young boy could face. The worst were the adults. Because of how I prepared my son and supported him in his dreams, he has almost reached his goal and he looks back on all the ugly people who, for whatever weaknesses they felt inside, felt the need to make his journey difficult. He wishes he could go back to every single one of them and tell them the joy he will feel the rest of his life as an adult male dancer is far more fulfilling than the joy they felt while teasing him as a child.

At the age of 5, it is up to the parents and siblings to help support this child's choice. Having clever comebacks to deflate insults is the best way to handle it.

 

[mamacatnv]

My initial reaction is no but since I never actually encountered it I am not honestly sure what I would do.

My DS wanted a Barbie, we got him one, he wanted a baby doll and we got one of those too. All of this occurred before he was 3, his friends were all girls. Had he asked for Princess underwear I am positive I would have said no.

 

[Mrs.Toad]

Damage can only happen if you are weak and allow it to happen. I believe that a person should be able to express themselves in a manner that is true to who they are. My son wanted to be a ballet dancer from an early age. I prepared him for what he might encounter and encouraged him on the best ways to not let the feelings of others interfere with his dreams. He encountered all the possible ridicule a young boy could face. The worst were the adults. Because of how I prepared my son and supported him in his dreams, he has almost reached his goal and he looks back on all the ugly people who, for whatever weaknesses they felt inside, felt the need to make his journey difficult. He wishes he could go back to every single one of them and tell them the joy he will feel the rest of his life as an adult male dancer is far more fulfilling than the joy they felt while teasing him as a child.

At the age of 5, it is up to the parents and siblings to help support this child's choice. Having clever comebacks to deflate insults is the best way to handle it.

Sounds like you've parented your son well. Glad he is realizing his dream!

 

[CookieGVB]

You'd probably come across less judgmental people at Disney than trick or treating in some neighborhoods.

If some of the statements on these boards are anything to go by, I seriously doubt it.

 

[Robinrs]

I wouldn't even let my girl dress in that stupid outfit...

Double standards EXIST whether we want to face it or not. A girl who acts like a boy is called a tomboy, which is a positive, a boy who acts like a girl is called something much less positive and nasty. In this male oriented society it's the letter of law, and it's supported by the same people who make the social decisions that are very prevalent especially here on the DIS. Some of these "social nuances" are accepted, others are not.

 

[CathrynRose]

Would you allow your son to dress up as a princess at Disney? Especially KNOWING ppl are probably going to stare or make comments? Or would you go with the flow and let the little guy be a princess and not care what other ppl say and do?

This one ~ Or would you go with the flow and let the little guy be a princess and not care what other ppl say and do?

 

[disneyguy1818]

Personally, I think it's rather unlikely that someone is going to taunt a 3 year old boy over wearing a princess costume. If anything, they would make a comment to the parent, but that really shouldn't be an issue to you. Unless you take everyone else's parenting advice on every other issue, you should be used to the fact that there are going to be people who disagree with your parenting choices- but hey, you would probably disagree with the parenting choices made by the mother of that individual who would potentially say something rude to you about your son's costume (I don't think bigotry is genetic- has to have been learned somewhere). I certainly agree with the statement that there is a double standard, wherein a girl could dress as a pirate or in a boy's costume and it be generally viewed as acceptable, but the same would not happen in the reverse situation. However, your kid needs to find his identity and part of childhood is exploring the possibilities of life and trying things to find one's self. Some adult males dress as female characters for Halloween or for themed parties- but that does not mean they are gay or having questions about their gender. Either way, even if this does mean that your son is gay, still shouldn't matter. I think as a parent, you'd need to weigh outcomes in your decision. While there are many things that are permissable, it may not be the easiest route. If your son was 16 and decided to dress as a princess (though costume is usually not allowed at Disney parks for older guests), then you might be concerned that he would suffer additional hardship and taunting, but honestly, who would tease a 3 year old? In my opinion, you have very little to lose by just allowing him to dress as the princess. But you may have a lot of self-respect for your values and beliefs to lose if you deny your son this opportunity simply because of fear of what other mothers or fathers might say to you. Just my two cents.

 

[Aisling]

No, I wouldn't let my son dress like a princess in WDW. I'm old-fashioned when it comes to things like that.

 

[ebtbmom]

I find it interesting that some of the posters who are so "open minded" and would let their son dress as a princess are suprisingly closed minded and intolerant of any poster that disagrees with their view.

I would tell my son no-I also told him no about a t-shirt with monkeys passing gas on each other that my dad bought him. I am the parent and if I am uncomfortable with the way my child is being presented I can change it.

It is ridiculous to act like princess costumes are for boys, the last time I checked, there were no male princesses any where in the world-they are called prince.

 

[Art 1]

No.

 

[Robindianne]

On the Moms panel a mom asked this question of the panel...

"Attending a character dinner with our 3 yo son who sometimes likes to be the prince & sometimes the princess- how will staff react to a boy dressed in the more girlie costumes? Will staff help us find a new seat if other guests make rude comments?"

Would you allow your son to dress up as a princess at Disney? Especially KNOWING ppl are probably going to stare or make comments? Or would you go with the flow and let the little guy be a princess and not care what other ppl say and do?

Absolutely. He's 3. A dress won't make a 3 year old gay any more than a fire helmet won't make him a firefighter.

 

[CathrynRose]

Besides that - and feel free to flame me -- it's WEIRD.

When you let your mind become so "open" that your brain falls out, that's a problem.

I think it's weird anyone would make any sort of judgement on a kid.

And the 2ns sentence ~ Once of the grossest things I think I've ever read, on here.

 

[Robindianne]

I once read THIS blog:



I love her.

OMG I love her too. What a wonderful human being and mother.

 

[Robindianne]

Pants have been gender neutral for decades. Dresses are not gender neutral. They are meant for girls. And boys who want to dress up like girls. Nobody makes a dress or a dress costume with the idea that boys will be wearing them. Not at Walmart and not in fashion.

Whether or not you like dresses doesn't change the fact that they are meant for girls.

If you want to let your son wear one, that is your right. I just wouldn't let mine. Not in public.

Actually here in Seattle you'd see many men in kilts. You get used to it and think nothing of it. In fact, it's kind of sexy (are we aloud to say that here?)

 

[topolino]

I would not.

When he's old enough to understand gender roles (they do exist, even if we wish they didn't) and still wants to wear one, more power to him.

 

[nmmom95]

I would not.

When he's old enough to understand gender roles (they do exist, even if we wish they didn't) and still wants to wear one, more power to him.

I agree with this. I think it's my job to teach my kids what is socially acceptable. I hope I also give them the confidence to be themselves. If, when they are older, they choose to do something outside the "norm," I would support their choices.

 

[Liberty Belle]

Yes, if he really wanted to.

 

[pigletgirl]

No, I would never allow that.

 

[DisneyLoverUSA]

I would not.

When he's old enough to understand gender roles (they do exist, even if we wish they didn't) and still wants to wear one, more power to him.

I completely agree.

 

[bengeneric]

I find it interesting that some of the posters who are so "open minded" and would let their son dress as a princess are suprisingly closed minded and intolerant of any poster that disagrees with their view.

This.