We Are SUNK - Any Advice?

[mrsbornkuntry]

We are union, and there are only two of us in the employment category that I fall into. It's now considered a non-benefits eligible position. When they renewed our contract, it was either give up the benefits all together, or they would just do away with the positions. A rock and a hard place, so to speak.

I don't know what we could sell. Those are the two vehicles we currently have. Other than our furniture and clothing, there's not much else left. Kids have a video game system for their entertainment, but can not sell that. They only get new games with money from their birthdays. We never go to the store anymore because its just too depressing. Any ideas on what I could sell? Other than my wedding bands, I have no jewelry worth anything.

Any outgrown toys or clothes? I think now is a good time for toys on ebay and craigslist. Any furniture you don't need/want? Decorative items like candles, wall mirrors, framed prints? Old tools, bikes, kitchen appliances? Pretend you are moving and walk through your house and think of whether or not you would want to pack it up and take it with you if you moved. You would be amazed what people will buy. And while it may not seem like alot those little snowflakes really add up. If you sell one item for $20 that would pay for your one of your kids' activities for the month.

 

[thomas998]

Now, consider what options you have.

I don't know where you live so I don't know what the prospects for a turn around in the housing market are... I doubt they are very good. With that knowledge that things really aren't going to get better where you live right now, do you think it would be an improvement to move somewhere else and start over? You husband seems to be a laborer from what you describe, so he might have a much better chance finding a job somewhere else. Some areas of the country are actually hiring laborers such as parts of southern Texas, or out in North Dakota where all the new oil and gas drilling is going on. Maybe his skills would allow him to find employment in that type of industry instead of housing.

The sad fact is, many parts of the country are not going to recover. Areas like Michigan that depended on auto manufacturering as doomed. Not sure about where you live but honestly ask yourself, is there a realist chance that things will get better where you live. If there isn't then don't wait until you are completely broke and bankrupt, plan to migrate somewhere else now while you can do so on your own terms. It is much easier to restart if you restart in a new place with some money from selling your house than it is to restart when the bank has foreclosed on the house and you have nothing but the shirt on your back and a car to call home.

You need to sit down with your husband and make some hard decisions.

It is always better to make a change on your terms than it is to be forced to make a change from forces beyond your control.

 

[MoonpieMomma]

Yea, but she said the next town is 11 miles away. That must be the town she and her DH work in.

OP-Is the town 11 miles away where you work?

I do work in the town that is 11 miles away. My DH works about 25 miles from home because that's where the job is. Like I said, he carpools with someone, so he pays him $40 per month for gas.

 

[MoonpieMomma]

Any outgrown toys or clothes? I think now is a good time for toys on ebay and craigslist. Any furniture you don't need/want? Decorative items like candles, wall mirrors, framed prints? Old tools, bikes, kitchen appliances? Pretend you are moving and walk through your house and think of whether or not you would want to pack it up and take it with you if you moved. You would be amazed what people will buy. And while it may not seem like alot those little snowflakes really add up. If you sell one item for $20 that would pay for your one of your kids' activities for the month.

I've never sold on craigs list or ebay? How do I get started? We live very rurally, so would craigs list even be a good idea, or not woth the time? I've heard people talk about the site, but I've never personally been on it.

 

[mrsbornkuntry]

I've never sold on craigs list or ebay? How do I get started? We live very rurally, so would craigs list even be a good idea, or not woth the time? I've heard people talk about the site, but I've never personally been on it.

Ebay isn't that great anymore because of the fees, but craigslist is super easy and free. Since you work in another town you could list the items, then plan to meet the person to sell them while you're in town. All you need is to register for a free account, take a picture of what you want to sell, set a price (might want to set it a little higher than you think you'll get, some people like to haggle). Craigslist will give you a dummy email address that they click on and it actually goes to your email so you don't have to give out personal info to everyone. There is also a wanted section on there that I like to skim over to see if anyone might be looking for something I wanted to sell so I don't even have to go through the trouble of listing it, I just contact them.

 

[KennesawNemo]

I've never sold on craigs list or ebay? How do I get started? We live very rurally, so would craigs list even be a good idea, or not woth the time? I've heard people talk about the site, but I've never personally been on it.

Is there any kind of work around where you live for your teenager kids? Babysitting, delivering paper, running errand, yard work, pet sitting? Works that do not require driving?

My personal belief is it's not right for parents to ask kids to help with household spendings. However, if they could and they are willing to, I say why not.

Also, given your situation, they need to save money for themselves. If they could, they should help to pay for the activity, they can even do more activities if they can pay on their own.

 

[sissy_ib]

I've never sold on craigs list or ebay? How do I get started? We live very rurally, so would craigs list even be a good idea, or not woth the time? I've heard people talk about the site, but I've never personally been on it.

Craigslist is worth a try. It is free so if you don't sell you are not out anything. There are CL and ebay threads here on the budget board.

 

[mom2maggie]

My sister and her husband were drowning in debt - I mean, it was bad. They were getting calls daily, harassing calls. They couldn't make ends meet, no matter what they trimmed or cut out. There just wasn't enough money to go around. They both worked full time, their daycare was paid for by my brother in laws parents, etc. They finally contacted CCCS and it turned their life around. They were on a 3 year plan, and their plan will be done next year. I can't tell you the difference it has made for them.

 

[ldo]

do NOT take a HELOC or refinance your home under any circumstance. The most important thing for your kids is to have a consistent roof over their heads, same school, and see how their parents deal with these--no matter how bleak it seems. There are plenty of folks who have had to declare bankruptcy. That is the last resort, and I applaud you for not rushing to get out of your debts--but sometimes, esp. with job issues, that is all that it left.
You have a good paying job and DH has benefits--together that is a GOOD combo! I would tell the kids that you have some big financial issues, but assure them that you will be OK and that others over the years--depressions, etc. have also had hard times and that you are a family and will get through this together. Applaud your son for understanding about the driver's permit--let him know that is a BIG contribution to the family right now and tell him you will do your best when finances get worked out.
I would seek out a non-profit consumer counseling service--you could even start a post that says "non-profit, reputable consumer counseling" on disboards and get lots of recommendations. CC debt and unsecured debt is the best debt to have--as they can't take anything away from you. Again--do NOT do anything that increase debt on your HOUSE.
Many are weathering this storm. Hang in there. Elaine

 

[crashbb]

I think she is saying the mom & pop place is the ONLY business it town, not the only construction business.

Only business in their town. There is work in the town 11 miles away (and in the town 25 miles away).

At least, that it my understanding.

 

[MyDizneyBoyz]

To answer the original question in the title of your thread, yes, I do have advice.

Talk to a real-life person in your local municipality or county social services office.

There are LOTS of options for social services and they are there for folks to use as tools or stepping stones to get things back on track.

While I think it can be beneficial to ask for advice or opinions on a board such as this which has a large population and can give you ideas you may not have otherwise considered, you need to speak to someone LOCALLY and IN REAL LIFE who will have the BEST advice for you.

Yes, it can mean swallowing some pride and mustering some courage to walk into your local social services office and asking for help but it's what you need to do at this point.

No one on a Disney forum board is going to be able to give you the personalized advice you and your family need.

 

[Lucky4me]

You don't sound sunk at all.
You have $70,000 in home equity. Only use that as an absolute last resort.

If you have $50,000 or close to that in unsecured debt, I'd file bankruptcy. The problem with the consumer agencies is your credit gets dinged about as bad as filing bankruptcy.
Before filing, I'd refinance the house if possible, but not take any more mortgage on.
I'd dump the cells asap and go tracphones.
Sign the kids up for the house leagues, town leagues, whatever are the cheapest. Maybe join a YMCA -they have financial aid and it's not income based, but your overall financial situation.
Don't worry about your 16 year old not driving yet. If hes not driving by the time he's 20, then you can worry. Most car accidents happen to kids between 16-18 anyway. All my kids got permits at 16, but didn't get licenses until they were 18 or older. Some of their friends who got them earlier got in accidents, totaled cars and ended up not driving until later anyway. Only one out of my three got in an accident and it was someone running into him when he was 19.

If you're not already doing it, cut Coupons for groceries.
You don't have to go all TLC coupon crazy, but I save 25% average off my grocery bill.
When you eat out that one time a month, make it a cheaper restaurant, preferrably one that offers decent discount coupons or specials.

Advertise for night babysitting-some people need third or C shift sitters and not many people offer that. Even 2nd shift if you'll be home. If you love kids, it's not a bad way to make some extra cash.

Shop for clothing at consignment shops.

Go to a church food cupboard, or a town food bank. They don't usually ask for proof of income, at least they don't here. You could cut your food budget a lot if you visited one of these three or four times a year. You'd be in good company, as it's not just for the poorest of the poor any more. I went with my friend one time and another time they delivered the food right to her house. She was so thankful.

If you have medical bills, try to negotiate with them to lower the balance.

We've had to do everything above except file bankruptcy due to high medical bills and dh not being able to work. Our income has dropped about 60% from before he was diagnosed.

If the hospital had not forgiven one very high bill, we would have had to file bankruptcy too.
It's amazing what we do without and not really miss it. Right now I'm trying to figure out a cheaper internet alternative. I have paying $40 a month for it.

As far as the vehicles go, maybe your dh could barter his skills for a mechanics skills. dh used to do that all the time before he got sick.
Now, not so much, but we're lucky to have friends who fix cars, do plumbing, electrical, carpentry, etc. I don't know what we'd do without these friends since our house is 40 years old and falling apart.

Good luck on everything and know that even though it feels like it's really bad, it's really not. Try to look at it as a challenge, not as a defeat. A temporary glitch that will soon be fixed.

 

[JB2K]

I know that kids live and die for their cell phones, but you don't NEED them to keep in touch with your kids. Entire generations grew up without cell phones and managed to get by.

You're right - and we had something back then called "pay phones" to fill that void.

I understand in the Northeast, pay phones are alive and well (albeit, in much smaller numbers than when we were kids), but in other parts of the country, pay phones are a rare find, indeed.

With that said, I would still ditch the cell phones and go the prepaid route (if the're talkers, get them a Tracfone with "triple minutes", or if they text a lot, try a prepaid with an unlimited texting plan).

 

[robinb]

We use consumer credit counseling.. I'd check it out. It's non for profit. You can go in for a consultation and decide from there. I still own my debt, nothing was cut in half however working with them they were able to lower my interest rates. I'm on a 3 year plan, just finished my 2nd year. I can't tell you how great its been. We're now about to have a good savings, starting paying extra to the accounts, and are living comfortably on a good budget. They offer classes and talk to you about every months to see how you are doing. I do it all over the phone but they always offer to have you come in and speak to people. Of course its on my record I work with them so my credit is still bad.. I will have to rebuild it but right now we're good.

Good luck to you.

Sorry that I wasn't clear. My mother's PAYMENTS were almost cut in half because she had 29% screw-you (IMO usurious) interest rates on many of her cards. She still would have paid all the current principle on what she owed, but not the super high interest when she moved forward with the program.

 

[pamrob]

Check your insurance. Our children do not incur extra insurance costs when they have a permit. It is only when the permit becomes a restricted license or regular license that our insurance goes up. So it may be that your son could get a permit and get some driving experience until he could afford the insurance he would need with a license.

 

[mrsbornkuntry]

If you have any books, cds or dvd's there are places online where you enter the upc codes and they will give you an estimate of how much they will pay you for them, then you mail them in to them. If you google it you will come up with alot of them, I've used cash4books.net with good results.

 

[mrsklamc]

Oh and it's too late for you, OP, but if anyone else runs into this situation- don't put dental work or medical expenses on a credit card. Usually the provider will work out a no interest payment plan for medical expenses.

Are there video games the kids don't use? Also, I know it's hard, but you have said you 'can't' do without the cell phones and you 'can't' sell the gaming system- you're at a point where the 'can't's' have to come off the table. I know it's hard to feel like you are depriving the kids, but they WOULD live without a gaming system.

 

[MoonpieMomma]

Check your insurance. Our children do not incur extra insurance costs when they have a permit. It is only when the permit becomes a restricted license or regular license that our insurance goes up. So it may be that your son could get a permit and get some driving experience until he could afford the insurance he would need with a license.

Thanks. I will have to check into this. Would help lessen the guilt a little bit.

 

[mrsklamc]

Also call local churches and ask about whether they have benevolence programs or can offer any help with Christmas.

 

[mad hatter fan]

You may be able to let your son get his permit and start practicing. When DH called our insurance company, they said the premiums would not go up until DS actually got his license. I'd check and see.