Toys for Christmas right??? Not clothes... vent ahead..

[Ceila]

My DD loved getting clothes at OP's daughter's age. She still does, actually. Not that she didn't love toys, but lots of little girls like getting clothes. OP, maybe that's what your in-laws were thinking.

 

[Dee77]

Maybe they spent their budget all on clothes that they thought that she would like/look cute in. Just because they aren't toys doesn't mean that she might not like them.

I haven't seen where you mentioned the puzzles before. Do they know that she enjoys inexpensive puzzles from the Dollar Store? An inexpensive puzzle may not have done too much damage to their budget after they purchased the "cute/trendy" clothes.

They do, it's a running joke that the smaller lesser expensive things always go over well sort of like how kids love to play with a large appliance boxes etc.

 

[englishteacha]

As a child I got a mix of presents, clothes and toys and books. My big sisters were great at getting me "cool" clothes, because my parents certainly weren't going to! In our family, we open all gifts on Christmas day, so if someone gave clothes and someone else gave toys, it all balanced out. I'm hoping we get practical items for our baby as well as toys! My big sisters are already excited to buy baby clothes, and gadgets, and toys as well. We, and baby, will be glad for any gift we receive!

 

[Dr.Girlfriend]

My kids would be happy with new clothes - they're both clothes horses. Why is it weird to receive clothes for Christmas?

When did people stop remembering that Christmas is about your friends and family, not what gifts you do and do not receive?

 

[Wishing on a star]

They do, it's a running joke that the smaller lesser expensive things always go over well sort of like how kids love to play with a large appliance boxes etc.

Gotta love those old MasterCard 'Priceless' commercials!!!

 

[maddiel]

OP - I have a question: Your daughter is 5 - have these relatives given her toys and only toys for her first 4 Christmases? I can see why you might be surprised in that case.

My DD's have always gotten always a mix of things- clothes, toys, books, experiences, sports equipment, art supplies. DD18 was the only grandchild on both sides and the only niece for 7 years - if everyone had just gotten her toys every year, I wouldn't have been able to walk through the living room in January!

I always pretty much know what everyone in the family is getting my girls for Christmas - I don't order anyone to purchase particular things, but I do try to coordinate things to make sure everyone has the opportunity to give a give with a little bit of "wow" and that no one gets all the hot gift ideas. I also try to suggest gifts to people fit their style of giving - like always suggesting a book title to the godmother who likes to give books. It also reduces the chances of them getting multiples of the same gift (like the year I got 3 wafflemakers!)

M.

 

[ksjayhawks]

I have not read the whole thread but you have the right to vent if you want to.

However, your inlaws also have the right to give the gifts that they want and evidently they like giving clothes. Teach your daughter to be gracious about the gifts that she recieves. Once they are hers she can do with them as she wants--or you want--return for something else, donate, throw away, wear.

The blanket doesn't have to fit on the bed--it can be used elsewhere to curl up on the sofa or floor, to cover up with when she lays on her bed to read or rest, to take in the car to cover up with, etc.

Realize that they may never give her toys and your, and your dd, won't feel hurt and letdown. Your dd will mimic your reactions right now, so if you act enthused, she will as well.

 

[goofy!]

Is it just me or has something changed, but I have always felt that kids should get mostly toys for Christmas not clothes or hats etc...

My one SIL wanted to get my DD(5) Ugg boots this year and she would have except that I told her we have already taken care of her boots for this year so she asked what to get her and I said anything Barbie... she sent quite a few things directly from the store and explained that the gifts weren't wrapped, no problem. Good thing I said something because my other SIL (still my husband's side of the family) sent her gifts for my DD up to us with a family friend and since it was quite a few packages, I told DD she could open them. We won't be seeing his side of the family at all for Christmas and I figured that she would have a head start on playing with her new toys... well, she got all clothes and an ornament. My MIL also gave her an item of clothes, a holiday themed blanket for her bed (too small) and holiday cookie cutters. I was glad that she could at least open the Barbie things and have something to play with rather than fold and put away (especially since it was a special occasion that she could open them early.)

I know I have my issues with the in-laws and such but for a 5 year old, I thought this was a little ridiculous. I felt bad because she started to show the classic signs of "oh no, not more clothes" creeping out as she opened her gifts. Thankfully she will get her fair share of toys from my side this weekend.

Maybe I am focusing in on this too much but I would never buy a child over a year old clothes for Christmas unless it is my own child.

OK looking forward to seeing what others think..

You do realize that gift giving is not an obligation and gift receiving is not a right?

I hope you did not paint yourself into a corner with your "venting."

If I ever got so much as a whisper of a hint that my DIL was ungraciously whining (or sorry, venting) about my and my side of the family's gift-giving abilities and stating that thankfully "her" side of the family does it right (implying she was unthankful with my side of the family), she would have whined (vented) herself out of any future presents.

Time to start teaching your daughter the value of the love for a family behind a gift rather than focusing so much on the material aspects of a GIFT.

 

[Dee77]

OP - I have a question: Your daughter is 5 - have these relatives given her toys and only toys for her first 4 Christmases? I can see why you might be surprised in that case.

My DD's have always gotten always a mix of things- clothes, toys, books, experiences, sports equipment, art supplies. DD18 was the only grandchild on both sides and the only niece for 7 years - if everyone had just gotten her toys every year, I wouldn't have been able to walk through the living room in January!

I always pretty much know what everyone in the family is getting my girls for Christmas - I don't order anyone to purchase particular things, but I do try to coordinate things to make sure everyone has the opportunity to give a give with a little bit of "wow" and that no one gets all the hot gift ideas. I also try to suggest gifts to people fit their style of giving - like always suggesting a book title to the godmother who likes to give books. It also reduces the chances of them getting multiples of the same gift (like the year I got 3 wafflemakers!)

M.

No these relatives never give only toys but something that is a toy each year and other misc items like last Christmas, SIL gave DD a tent for her room along with other similar type gifts as this year, sweater, ornamemt etc. and MIL/FIL gave her a car that she drives along with a disney doll, apron etc.

 

[LuLuO]

Is it just me or has something changed, but I have always felt that kids should get mostly toys for Christmas not clothes or hats etc...

My one SIL wanted to get my DD(5) Ugg boots this year and she would have except that I told her we have already taken care of her boots for this year so she asked what to get her and I said anything Barbie... she sent quite a few things directly from the store and explained that the gifts weren't wrapped, no problem. Good thing I said something because my other SIL (still my husband's side of the family) sent her gifts for my DD up to us with a family friend and since it was quite a few packages, I told DD she could open them. We won't be seeing his side of the family at all for Christmas and I figured that she would have a head start on playing with her new toys... well, she got all clothes and an ornament. My MIL also gave her an item of clothes, a holiday themed blanket for her bed (too small) and holiday cookie cutters. I was glad that she could at least open the Barbie things and have something to play with rather than fold and put away (especially since it was a special occasion that she could open them early.)

I know I have my issues with the in-laws and such but for a 5 year old, I thought this was a little ridiculous. I felt bad because she started to show the classic signs of "oh no, not more clothes" creeping out as she opened her gifts. Thankfully she will get her fair share of toys from my side this weekend.

Maybe I am focusing in on this too much but I would never buy a child over a year old clothes for Christmas unless it is my own child.

OK looking forward to seeing what others think..

I'd be thrilled with clothes or shoes or activities like a botanical garden membership or something. Toys are fine, but too many toys just end up not getting played with. I think we should teach our kids to be appreciative of whatever gifts family members or friends are generous enough to give to them and if it is something they don't like they can donate it or exchange it.

 

[java]

I will say this thread has me rethinking the gifts I bought my teenage nephews. I got them tshirts from our overseas travels. They don't get to travel a lot so I wanted something interesting for them to have. They also don't get a lot of new clothing & wear a lot of hand me downs. I guess I'll see what they say when we open gifts.

My kids loved getting tee shirts from foreign countries! I bet they love them!

 

[Jennasis]

Perhaps, in the future, you should just hold off on letting the kid open gifts until Christmas Day...this way the poor thing will get "her fair share" of toys in addition to clothing and have something to play with.

 

[Dee77]

You do realize that gift giving is not an obligation and gift receiving is not a right?

I hope you did not paint yourself into a corner with your "venting."

If I ever got so much as a whisper of a hint that my DIL was ungraciously whining (or sorry, venting) about my and my side of the family's gift-giving abilities and stating that luckily "her" side of the family does it right (implying she was unlucky with my side of the family), she would have whined (vented) herself out of any future presents.

See that's just it, my counterpart, meaning the other DIL that married one of MIL's sons, not her daughter that is technically also my SIL, has made it crystal clear that the clothes she has recieved for births, birthday and holiday presents will "go to the Mexicans that mow our lawn if they are from Carters, Childrens Place or Walmart etc, they will never see the light of day on my children" So we have all sort of discussed how different all of our tastes are in clothes and also what we each prefer/can spend on clothes etc so that is also a part of why I would have thought that outfits and such would be avoided but matching disney pj's are still good for grandma to get. See there I go again with more in-law venting but really it had to be said.

 

[LuLuO]

See that's just it, my counterpart, meaning the other DIL that married one of MIL's sons, not her daughter that is technically also my SIL, has made it crystal clear that the clothes she has recieved for births, birthday and holiday presents will "go to the Mexicans that mow our lawn if they are from Carters, Childrens Place or Walmart etc, they will never see the light of day on my children" So we have all sort of discussed how different all of our tastes are in clothes and also what we each prefer/can spend on clothes etc so that is also a part of why I would have thought that outfits and such would be avoided but matching disney pj's are still good for grandma to get. See there I go again with more in-law venting but really it had to be said.

Seriously?

 

[Jennasis]

See that's just it, my counterpart, meaning the other DIL that married one of MIL's sons, not her daughter that is technically also my SIL, has made it crystal clear that the clothes she has recieved for births, birthday and holiday presents will "go to the Mexicans that mow our lawn if they are from Carters, Childrens Place or Walmart etc, they will never see the light of day on my children" So we have all sort of discussed how different all of our tastes are in clothes and also what we each prefer/can spend on clothes etc so that is also a part of why I would have thought that outfits and such would be avoided but matching disney pj's are still good for grandma to get. See there I go again with more in-law venting but really it had to be said.

Did it?

You should stop. Seriously. Every time you post, you dig yourself a deeper and uglier hole.

 

[izzy]

See that's just it, my counterpart, meaning the other DIL that married one of MIL's sons, not her daughter that is technically also my SIL, has made it crystal clear that the clothes she has recieved for births, birthday and holiday presents will "go to the Mexicans that mow our lawn if they are from Carters, Childrens Place or Walmart etc, they will never see the light of day on my children" So we have all sort of discussed how different all of our tastes are in clothes and also what we each prefer/can spend on clothes etc so that is also a part of why I would have thought that outfits and such would be avoided but matching disney pj's are still good for grandma to get. See there I go again with more in-law venting but really it had to be said.

Why?

 

[YodaGirl]

See that's just it, my counterpart, meaning the other DIL that married one of MIL's sons, not her daughter that is technically also my SIL, has made it crystal clear that the clothes she has recieved for births, birthday and holiday presents will "go to the Mexicans that mow our lawn if they are from Carters, Childrens Place or Walmart etc, they will never see the light of day on my children" So we have all sort of discussed how different all of our tastes are in clothes and also what we each prefer/can spend on clothes etc so that is also a part of why I would have thought that outfits and such would be avoided but matching disney pj's are still good for grandma to get. See there I go again with more in-law venting but really it had to be said.

You do see that is wrong on many levels, right?

And, no, it didn't. In addition to my parents teaching me to be appreciative for what I'm given, they also taught me that if you can't say something nice, don't say anything.

 

[luvsJack]

Really??- even as a kid we opened them as they came. There was enough under the tree to open on Christmas that we didn't need to add the other gifts under there too. If my daughter gets a package in the mail she opens it as it comes-everyone else I know does it that way too! I never heard people actually put them under the tree for Christmas!




Exactly-if I am buying a gift its going to be something the person really wants-I don't buy a gift just to give something-if that is what someone is doing I would rather they not give at all. I think most kids would have the same reaction as OP's child and it is not because they are spoiled- Christmas is for fun gifts not clothes (unless they are asked for!)--I buy my daughter clothes all through the year as she needs them, they are not gifts-they are just part of raising a child! Geez do you people give underwear and bras as gifts to your kids too????

I DO!!!!! DD is getting two bras in her favorite color one with pink ribbon running through it and a bow and the other with polka dots and lace!!

 

[Dee77]

Seriously?

Yep, that's the one who wanted to get the Uggs, I was so glad that I had already gotten my child snow boots and casual ones for the winter because I just can't get over the previous years remarks about clothing for kids and babies.

 

[dogluva]

Oh and you seem like such a peach... maybe you could write a parenting and etiquette book for folks like me who apparently need it ASAP.

Who would have thought that it was a unique and far fetched concept that children get, dare I say "toys" for Christmas.

OP, you just don't realize how you came across. Sorry, you sound very ungrateful. Put yourself in someone else's shoes. Some of us on here do not have relatives who buy our kids gifts. Some don't even have money to buy their own kids what they really want. So you complaining that your child "only" got clothes from family members sounds horrible. I have six kids and they only get things from us. I would love for my inlaws or my relatives to think of them even if it is a pair of socks! It just troubles me that people are really like this and that so many posters defended you! Where has the true meaning of Christmas gone??? And no, Christmas is not all about getting toys! Really?

It really sounds like your daughter will have plenty of Barbies to open up from you on Christmas morning so why would you even care enough to give it another thought, never mind vent to a bunch of strangers! Yes, we have all opened up gifts we didn't want or need but we move on-not actually get bothered enought to write about it on a message board!