Should I take my 10 yr old son in the ladies restroom?

[HappyLawyer]

Why can't a 10-year-old go to the restroom by himself? What opportunities for danger are there in an airport or Disney bathroom? Has there been an epidemic of bathroom crimes that I've missed? In Disney World? Seems way overprotective to me.

Are you serious? or are you just joking, any place is a danger for children, disney, church anywhere, if there are child snatchers, many of them are professional, i watch many specials, one a woman asked why didn't the child scream, the person came up from behind him and put a cloth over his face and knocked him out,
I understand the concerns of the op look at everything going on in the world and all the children comming up missing. Just because it's disney nothing, disney is disney but people are people, no matter where they go.

 

[Vickie46]

I still think its weird.. I know last year when an older little boy was in the ladies bathroom... a lot of people were talking.... I know if I had a boy and I was at Disney by myself.. I would be freaking out.. I am over protected anyways.... but I think you should just find a bathroom that you both can go too... like the family bathroom! I think that is just the nice thing to do... I can see 5 or 6 and under.. I think that is almost pushing it.

 

[tomspixie]

I have two DSs and one DD. Those boys have been in the ladies restrooms at WDW for a long time. They would stand at MY stall with their heels facing me. A woman gave them and me a very hard time once. My DH had had to stay home and couldn't be there. The boys were about 8 and 6. They were completely humiliated. Only in an emergency do we do that anymore. From now on, we find the companion bathrooms at BOTH WDW and the airports! My youngest, now 9, figured out where EVERY companion restroom was on WDW property by the time our trip where they were humiliated ended.

To all you moms who need to bring your sons in, keep doing it! Our kids our ours for such a short time and it is our responsiblity to keep them safe. You are doing what needs to be done!

tomspixie

 

[4theloveofdisney]

I am going to be traveling to WDW with my 10 year old son. Should I let him use the mens restroom? Or take him in the ladies room with me? I am asking this questions about not just in disney, but also at the airport.

Thanks

I haven't read through all of the posts but wanted to add my .02 I think it's a judgement call and only you, as a parent, can make that call at that moment. I would personally feel comfortable taking my son with me into the ladies room or letting my son, who is 8, use the restroom at Disney as the typical restroom is open and only comes out one way. I can stand right outside and hear him if he called out, and I could be there in an instant. There is also a ton of traffic and I believe that if there were a problem, someone would notice. Also, many times, the attendants are in there as well. However, we have been to Disney many times and I know the layout so I am comfortable in this instance. At the airport I think I would take hime with me or look for family/companion bathrooms. No matter what, it's your call and you are the one who is in charge of his safety. If you get a dirty look, so what?! You will never see that person again most likely anyway.

 

[Vickie46]

I do agree with keeping our children safe.. I just think unless an emergency situation.. maybe the child is sick etc.. you need to find the family bathroom!

 

[MichelleVW]

I just don't see the big deal with leaving a 10 year old sitting on a bench outside the bathroom door for 2 minutes while you pee?? I left my oldest on a bench to go ride a roller coaster when she was 10 (5 minute standby line). She was in plain sight and knows what to do in case of a stranger trying to kidnap her and at MGM I can't see that happening anyway...

I would really worry more with sending the boy in the men's bathroom alone than standing in plain sight of a bunch of parents walking by there with their kids.....

I am really paranoid about watching the kids at highway rest areas and places like that...but a 10 year old standing outside a bathroom at Disney World????? If the boy has any sense at all which I'm sure he does, then he will be fine.

I asked my 13 year old daughter what she would think if she saw a 10 year old boy in the girls bathroom and there was a look of horror on her face!

 

[pepperw23]

Last night in Carrol County, Maryland (a very nice, quiet suburb of Baltimore) in a Ruby Tuesday a young boy of 7 went to the bathroom with his siblings who then left. He was then sexually molested by a man in the bathroom who told him if he made a noise he would hurt him. The boy left the restroom and told his dad. The man has been caught and arrested.

Forget about it!!! DS (7) is not going in alone!!!!!

That happened here a couple of years back. The mother was right outside the door!!! She thought he was taking too long, so she sends another gentleman in there to find him. The gentleman found her 10 year old son with a blond wig on and partially undressed. The assailant fled and I don't know if he was ever caught. If you are wondering why she waited so long? She didn't. Her son was in the bathroom five minutes!!! Both of mine are teens now, and are able to go on their own (although I do go with my 15 year old daughter still).

When my son hit the age of 8 he was no longer comfortable going in the ladies room. I would stand at the door, but as he was going in I would shout "I am right here son". I saw that idea on the news. It shows any potential predators there is an adult right there ready to take action.

It is a sad day in our society when we don't even feel like it is safe to go to the bathroom. The criminals have taken away our freedom. It is time we as Americans insist something be done about it.

 

[LOLA2]

Myself as a grown woman and mother have no problem with a 10-year-old boy in the ladies room at the same time I am. However, I have two daughters and one is 13 and one is 8. They would both be mortified to have a boy in the bathroom with them and that is the one reason I object to it. I know safety is an issue and I feel for you but I'm concerned for my daughters, too. Just MHO.

Don't you think if you explained to your daughters why they were there they would understand? My daughter had her friend spend night last night they are 10 and 11. I explained situation first, Would you rather have a 10 yo sit by self outside bathroom to be preyed on by strangers, or his mom be protective and bing him in, what would you do when you are a mother. They both said at first with out knowing why they might have felt weird but now knowing why, they are tottaly ok with it. Moms just explain to your girls why and I think the mortification will simply turn to understanding and compassion. Talk to them before you get to Disney so it is not a big deal.

 

[Chester's Mum]

it does not seem safe for a 10 yo to sit out on a bench with freakos walking by.

That is a good point, but I don't think everyone in the world is a freako. Your son has to learn to be aware of danger, and trust his instincts at some point (and if he does tell you he felt funny about someone anywhere you should never invalidate that and always let him know you respect that he did trust his instincts). You can't follow him around 24/7. At 10 years old I had no problem with him going to the cul de sac on our street to play. He was out of my sight, but I did not feel like someone was going to scoop him up. He could be attacked in a washroom when he's 15 or 16 or 20...are you going to take him with you then? As I said, I don't personally have a problem with a 10 year old boy in the ladies, and definitely would not have let my son go to the mens or wait outside alone when he was younger than that. Teaching your child (male or female) to be an adult is the hardest thing you will every have to do.

I have never done anything that would make me feel uncomfortable with having a boy standing at the door

Nor have I, but the world does not revolve around only me. Lot's of people feel uncomfortable with a big boy in the ladies (note the previous poster's teen and tween girls).

 

[dkostel]

Sorry if this has been brought up, only read about 1/2 the posts, but although Disney is crowded, it is full of dads, and granddads, and uncles, and brothers. I know my dad or brother wouldn't even think twice about helping out someone else's son if they appeared to be in trouble. I'd be more concerned about sending him into a less crowded restroom.

 

[MommaluvsDis]

minnieandmickeymouse,

I haven't read all of the replies but wanted to convey my thoughts on this matter.

I do not want to offend anyone or be out of line, but I say "TAKE YOUR SON WITH YOU!" I am sure some remember the true, saw it on CNN, story of the family reunion that was held at a park. One boy needed to go and he asked his auntie. She said, "You're not going by yourself," and she stood outside of the mens' bathroom door while he went inside.

Immediately after the boy went in, a man scurried out. The auntie was waiting on the boy and started to worry when he did not come out. She went in and found that the man was a muderer. (I tried to think of a way to put this as least offensively as possible, please excuse me.) The auntie had done everything right.

So I say that you should, by all means, take and keep your son with you.
I hope I haven't offended anyone; if I did, I'm sorry but this is a true story.

 

[kaytieeldr]

I'm wondering if the OP (and the other posters who intend to bring their sons into the ladies room) has discussed this with her son? See how he feels about the whole thing, as well as discussing what to do in various situations? Also, most airport and Disney restrooms are, I think, designed with a sort of "S" or "U" shaped entrance. If it's the mom travelling with just a son and she needs to use the facilities, the son could stand there - not actually be IN the ladies room, but also not be out in the stream of traffic.

 

[golden1]

Wow, has the world changed since I was a kid!

I remember going to WDW with my parents when I was 8 and he was 12. They basically gave my step-brother a monorail pass and said, "Look after your sister!". We basically were by ourselves at WDW for a few hours every day - no adults. When I was 14, my parents let me have the run of the park by myself. I basically met them for dinner every night.

I definitely think there is a fine line here. While we as parents have to protect our children, at some point you have to teach them to protect themselves and trust that they will be able to handle certain situations. I think that I will be letting my son use the public restrooms by himself before the age of 10 and I will try to teach him how to react in suspicious situations. Can I protect him from everything? No. Do bad things happen despite everything? Yes. I guess it is just an individual decision each parent has to make.

 

[mickeyfan2]

minnieandmickeymouse,

I haven't read all of the replies but wanted to convey my thoughts on this matter.

I do not want to offend anyone or be out of line, but I say "TAKE YOUR SON WITH YOU!" I am sure some remember the true, saw it on CNN, story of the family reunion that was held at a park. One boy needed to go and he asked his auntie. She said, "You're not going by yourself," and she stood outside of the mens' bathroom door while he went inside.

Immediately after the boy went in, a man scurried out. The auntie was waiting on the boy and started to worry when he did not come out. She went in and found that the man was a muderer. (I tried to think of a way to put this as least offensively as possible, please excuse me.) The auntie had done everything right.

So I say that you should, by all means, take and keep your son with you.
I hope I haven't offended anyone; if I did, I'm sorry but this is a true story.

Let me see. The murderer could have gone into the ladies room and when the two of them entered, could have murderer both of them. Where is the link to list "story". How did the murderer not have blood on him?

 

[jann1033]

This is the main point of the thread, what to do when you have to go to the bathroom, not your child but everyone keeps on jumping in with the taking their boys to men's room because they have go pee. .

probably cause the original question was about taking a 10 yr old into the ladies room so HE could pee, not the mom


i have ( grown kids) and of course always had the "normal" parent stranger danger paranoia when they were growing up ( well maybe even more than normal in my case )but really you need to keep it in perspective...it's like a plane crash, you hear about stranger abductions, molestation( think about it, how many times do you hear about a stranger molesting a child verse a neighbor, priest, relative or someone else they know) but it really does not happen everyday...and a pp had a good point, you can do everything in your power and it still happen.

 

[hollyb]

I still think its weird.. I know last year when an older little boy was in the ladies bathroom... a lot of people were talking.... I know if I had a boy and I was at Disney by myself.. I would be freaking out.. I am over protected anyways.... but I think you should just find a bathroom that you both can go too... like the family bathroom! I think that is just the nice thing to do... I can see 5 or 6 and under.. I think that is almost pushing it.[/QUOTE


Do you have children? Would you think its "wierd" if God forbid something happen to them?

 

[jann1033]

ot but on topic...from what i have heard and read usually a molester will choose a subservient child...it seems to me the best protection you can give a child, boy or girl, is train them from very young to stand up for themselves...imo that would mean by the time they are 10 they would have some sense of self worth, know what to do if the situation seems abnormal, have a good "offensive plan " as in the singing so the parent hears them etc.( in no way do i think i am an authority so if someone knows this to be false, please say so). imo that is more helpful to the child then just putting him in an situation that embarrasses him and others and isn't really training him...parents are not around 24/7, sometime the child is going to have to use the bathroom with out mommy there ( ie maybe on a school field trip)

 

[abe_bb]

I am a father of a beautiful 5 year old daughter. And I send her into the ladies room alone while I stand near the door.

But this is a bit different, from my perspective.

You ladies all have closed stalls, so i don't see why a boy can't go in if the mother is uncomfortable. After all, the boy won't see anything.

But to take a little girl into a mens room... yeah, it got to the point where I had to shield her eyes because men aren't exactly "private" when using the, as my daughter put it, "stand up potties". And I feel safer sending her into the women's room alone, where I am just a yell away, then walking by some strangers using the "stand up potty" who might decide my daughter needs a show.

 

[csmommy]

We just came back from Disney & I let me DS who is 10 go to the bathroom alone. You are safe if it is crowded. Who is going to molest a child in a crowded bathroom? I wouldn't want to see a 10 year old boy in the ladies room. They are to mature for that, both physically & mentally. Also, you do need to give them some breathing room. Let them know you trust them & that they can trust their own instincts. I did wait directly outside the bathroom for him & called in if I felt he took too long.

 

[bamajill]

My personal opinion is 10 is too old. My ten year old is 5' and 105lbs. You would probably think he were 12 or 13 if he came in the restroom with me, lol.

So for those of you who would ABSOLUTELY bring your 10 year old into the ladies room, what is the cutoff age? I mean, is it still ok when they are 13, 14?? What if your 14 year old is 'small for his age'????

I guess my point is the chance of it happening is much smaller than the chance of us freaking our kids out. If our kids think that 'something bad' is out to get them and mommy can't let us out of her sight.....seems like we will end up raising a bunch of paranoid kid who see reason to fear the smallest things.

It's obviously a judgement call and you can do what you want (though I see from earlier post the op is no longer listening ) but I want to help my kids learn what to do in case of danger, but not have them expect danger at each and every turn, kwim?