S/O: Divorce... how to cut down?

[gmi3804]

But we went past "steady replacement" a long time ago. This:
View attachment 925376
level of population increase is what we actually have - and I don't believe it's healthy or sustainable.

(graphic source)

Don't worry, climate change will take care of the most needy among us. Mother Nature always wins.

 

[ClaraOswald]

I don't know. I don't have any good answers. That's why I asked if others had ideas. And the answer may be "there's nothing that can be done". Does that mean the question shouldn't be asked?

Is there any divorce rate that's TOO high? What if 99% of marriages ended in divorce? Is that ok with you?

How exactly does someone else's divorce or marriage status effect me? That's what I'm not understanding, I guess.

 

[sam_gordon]

How exactly does someone else's divorce or marriage status effect me? That's what I'm not understanding, I guess.

It doesn't. Should we only be concerned about things that affect us? If it doesn't affect affect us, we should just ignore things?

 

[disneychrista]

It doesn't. Should we only be concerned about things that affect us? If it doesn't affect affect us, we should just ignore things?

Who does anyone's divorce affect other than the people involved? I don't see this an a "for the greater good" type of issue.


IMO, if people worried more about the actual marriage than they do the wedding it would go a long way to cutting down marriages that quickly end in divorce.

 

[sam_gordon]

Who does anyone's divorce affect other than the people involved? I don't see this an a "for the greater good" type of issue.


IMO, if people worried more about the actual marriage than they do the wedding it would go a long way to cutting down marriages that quickly end in divorce.

Really? More people having happy and healthy marriages wouldn't be "for the greater good"? If that's what you think, ok. I disagree.

 

[disneychrista]

Really? More people having happy and healthy marriages wouldn't be "for the greater good"? If that's what you think, ok. I disagree.

But people getting divorced don't have happy & healthy marriages, which is why they are getting divorced.

The answer to how to lower the divorce rate is the second half of what I posted above.

 

[sam_gordon]

But people getting divorced don't have happy & healthy marriages, which is why they are getting divorced.

And now we've come full circle... what can be done, if anything, to get to more happy & healthy marriages, and therefore fewer divorces? I shouldn't be surprised I'm getting a bunch of kickback for just asking the question, this is the Dis afterall.

The answer to how to lower the divorce rate is the second half of what I posted above.

So you don't like the premise to the question but have an answer for it? How do you get people to care more for the marriage than the wedding?

 

[PollyannaMom]

IMO, if people worried more about the actual marriage than they do the wedding it would go a long way to cutting down marriages that quickly end in divorce.

Good point.

 

[disneychrista]

So you don't like the premise to the question but have an answer for it? How do you get people to care more for the marriage than the wedding?

Never said I didn't like the premise of the question. Just said others marriages don't affect the greater good. I am probably not the right person to be answering either question as a 52 year old woman who has never had a wedding or a marriage and only long term relationship ended after 3 years and should have ended after the first year.

 

[mi*vida*loca]

Let’s add in the fact that women are realizing being married and having children isn’t all it’s cracked up to be anymore. Women are usually tasked with more than 50% of the child rearing and house duties plus with the cost of living they now have to work and pay half the bills.

For a lot of women they see it as a dummy mission so staying single and traveling is what they’re choosing to do.

Then on the flip side you have men who are afraid to have wives be SAHMs because in the event of a divorce she’ll get half of everything that’s “his” plus alimony and child support. It’s not worth the risk for themselves either.

Although I do feel that more women are saying no to marriage and kids over men. I see a lot of men being bitter (I see on social media) because women are choosing not to get married and have kids.

 

[disneychrista]

Let’s add in the fact that women are realizing being married and having children isn’t all it’s cracked up to be anymore. Women are usually tasked with more than 50% of the child rearing and house duties plus with the cost of living they now have to work and pay half the bills.

But the flip side of this is they are single and pay 100% of the bills and are responsible for 100% of the house hold duties. There is a definite financial benefit to being part of a two income household vs being single. This is of course not a reason to get married or stay married. Just something to consider.

 

[mi*vida*loca]

But the flip side of this is they are single and pay 100% of the bills and are responsible for 100% of the house hold duties. There is a definite financial benefit to being part of a two income household vs being single. This is of course not a reason to get married or stay married. Just something to consider.

Very true. That’s why some live together, split the bills, never get married and don’t have kids.

 

[Owlpost23]

The nuclear family has been proven over and over as a huge key to a harmonious society. China is very concerned right now with all the current military age males in their society with so few choices of women to marry.

And that's completely on them.

 

[ClaraOswald]

It doesn't. Should we only be concerned about things that affect us? If it doesn't affect affect us, we should just ignore things?

I just mean....how does someone else's marriage status effect ANYONE else? If it literally effects no one outside of the couple....who really cares?

I don't see how marriage/divorce correlations to "the greater good" at all.

The general happiness level of a person in society...sure. And some people are much happier once they get out of a marriage. Just like some are happier married. Or happier unmarried.

People should do whatever works best for their own family if it isn't harming anyone else.

 

[PolymerSkywalker]

Married couples drive our economy and create our children of the future. The stats are quite clear that a child growing up in a two parent household with involved male and female authority figures in their lives delivers the best outcome for that child and for society as a whole.

 

[ClaraOswald]

Ah, yes....single parents and gay couples aren't raising kids with good outcomes at all.

 

[DisneyHardin]

Ah, yes....single parents and gay couples aren't raising kids with good outcomes at all.

Darn - I grew up in a single parent household. I guess I should go ahead and apologize for the drain I have caused on society.

 

[dcassetta]

The birth rate decline is likely more due to the fact that people can't afford kids until their 30s due to student loans and the cost of housing.

Rising cost of living and wages not keeping up with said cost of living is the main factor in the declining birth rate, not whether women are getting married or not.

The declining birthright is more complex than this. The United States has been below replacement rate since the 70s, and this pattern is seen in many industrialized countries today. Many demographers today say that the data shows that the world is a whole has probably reached replacement level. For highly industrialized countries it does have to do with the economy, but has more to do with options available to women. Female Education levels, access to contraception, the ability to work outside of the home, the ability to own property, percentage of the population living in urban areas, and participation in government have all led to lower birth rates.

But we went past "steady replacement" a long time ago. This:
View attachment 925376
level of population increase is what we actually have - and I don't believe it's healthy or sustainable.

(graphic source)

If you extend this graph out a little bit, what you’ll see is that most demographers think the world will reach replacement somewhere around the year 2100 and somewhere between 10 and 11 billion people. Obviously there is some flexibility with this. China, has probably already met its highest population, and is on the decline now. This will be true for a number of other countries also. it will be interesting to see what happens going forward with the immigration rate to the United States, as our immigration policy has created the population growth. It has also enabled us to keep a better worker to dependency ratio. Japan, which has very very restrictive immigration, is having significant issues with their economy, as they’re just aren’t enough workers, and without a change in the policy, they will continue to be not enough workers. Japan was surpassed by China as the world’s second largest economy about 15 years ago, and will probably be surpassed by Germany and India in the not too distant future. They aren’t the only ones in this predicament, though. And if the United States actually created a policy where all immigration stopped, we would find ourselves in some economic challenges.

 

[Smugpugmug]

The declining birthright is more complex than this. The United States has been below replacement rate since the 70s, and this pattern is seen in many industrialized countries today. Many demographers today say that the data shows that the world is a whole has probably reached replacement level. For highly industrialized countries it does have to do with the economy, but has more to do with options available to women. Female Education levels, access to contraception, the ability to work outside of the home, the ability to own property, percentage of the population living in urban areas, and participation in government have all led to lower birth rates.


If you extend this graph out a little bit, what you’ll see is that most demographers think the world will reach replacement somewhere around the year 2100 and somewhere between 10 and 11 billion people. Obviously there is some flexibility with this. China, has probably already met its highest population, and is on the decline now. This will be true for a number of other countries also. it will be interesting to see what happens going forward with the immigration rate to the United States, as our immigration policy has created the population growth. It has also enabled us to keep a better worker to dependency ratio. Japan, which has very very restrictive immigration, is having significant issues with their economy, as they’re just aren’t enough workers, and without a change in the policy, they will continue to be not enough workers. Japan was surpassed by China as the world’s second largest economy about 15 years ago, and will probably be surpassed by Germany and India in the not too distant future. They aren’t the only ones in this predicament, though. And if the United States actually created a policy where all immigration stopped, we would find ourselves in some economic challenges.


View attachment 925409

I agree with what you said, that's why I said main factor not only factor. I guarantee you that if you asked young people (35 and younger) why they're not having kids, the majority of them will cite finances as the reason why. I even see this in my own friend group. Most of my friends would start a family today if they made more money and were able to buy a home.

 

[sam_gordon]

Married couples drive our economy and create our children of the future.

Single people don't purchase anything? And the children they "create" don't survive? Why wouldn't they be part of the future?