PSA 2day...if you smoke, don't whine that you're BROKE!!! minivent

[katrina1122]

I believe that some shelters/organizations actually give donated pre-paid phones to homeless people looking for work.

Didn't know that, that certainly makes sense.

 

[Scornelius]

Smokers are drug addicts. They will do pretty much whatever they need to get their next fix. It's a horrible, horrible vice and I wish it would just be outlawed completely. It bad for the smoker, bad for the people around the smoker, bad for the community. Cigarette butts are pretty much the last 'acceptable' litter, and that makes me so mad when going around with my 2 year old. Luckily he's past the point of picking up everything and putting it in his mouth, but it's still gross to see them everywhere.

Both of my parents smoked heavily while I was growing up, even when we had to borrow money for food. They tapped my piggy bank more than once to feed their addiction. I stank every day at school. The house stank. It was mortifying.

When my son was born I kept large button up shirts in the front hall closet and handed them to anyone who smelled of smoke. Kinda like artist smocks for kindergarteners. There was no way my child was going to smell like that after a cuddle with nana. no way, no how. A few people got uppity about it, but no one outright refused. I'd then wash the shirt and put it back in the closet. I think it was a pretty good compromise.

 

[tink_lover]

Interesting thread and topic. I have known someone for over 20 years. We used to work together and have similar aged kids. She is a smoker. Recently lost her job, can't get unemployment (different story), house was foreclosed on due to recent divorce situation...you get the picture. She called me last week to share that she had gone on vacation for a few days, tell me her electricity was turned off, she was applying for food stamps. She did acknowledge the smokes were costing her a ton of money. Money she doesn't have. It is a drug and and hard to watch people spend so much money on them. I worry about her kids once she gets cancer from years of smoking.

 

[Irin997]

As a former smoker and the child of two previously heavy smokers that have quite, I call major BS on saying that smoking is like a drug addiction. Maybe it's just me, but I quit 7 years ago and haven't looked back. It's not that hard if you want it.

 

[Colleen27]

I think most non-smokers seriously underestimate the difficulty of quitting. It is like someone who has never struggled with weight telling an obese person "Just drop 50 lbs because fat is disgusting". It really isn't that simple, and someone with an addiction will always manage to find ways to fund it.

 

[disneywatcher]

Sounds like my sister...she has 3 children and smokes like a chimney and the have to be "brand" smokes too. My mom gives her money for her kids supplies and buy's them their school clothes. Doesn't help that she drinks beer like it's going out of style too.


I have 3 children, don't smoke and I buy their school supplies and clothes. I admit though that she does buy clothes for my oldest DD because she spends a month out of the summer with her grandma.

 

[WicketsMom]

My DH has a rental home that he is renting to a friend of his. The friend has come on some hard times, and fell behind quite a bit in paying rent. During this time, he is still a heavy smoker! (And is not supposed to be doing it in the house, but I haven't been inside it in a couple of years.) It infuriates me that he can pay for his cigarettes, but is not able to make the full rent payment.

And in regards to the person who will not let their child go to Grandma's house that reeks of smoke, good for you! Your first responsibility is to your child and my child wouldn't be allowed in that house either.

 

[Tybug]

I guess this thread could have evolved many different ways. Not surprisingly, it went with smokers are evil and will destroy the world if not stopped! Yes, I'm a 2 month converted evil e-smoker! Sue me.

But in the true nature of this thread... I'll jump in with my irritations in regards to the original post in this thread.

DH and I are both self-employed and it irritates me to no end when folks complain about the cost of (what I consider) necessities while affording their luxuries. People 'won't' afford health insurance, flood insurance, preventative dental appointments, etc. yet can find the money for vacations, fake nails, hair appointments and cell phones. It burns me to no end to hear mass media fall into the, "the gov't needs to provide because the public can't afford" garbage while folks walk around in their name brand clothes and tennis shoes. We spend more than what an average salary is on all the different types of insurance we are required to carry including health insurance yet we are expected to provide the basic necessities for those that can drive an Escalade??

Now my response to what the original thread evolved into:

Yes, smokes are expensive but no more than a cell phone bill and getting your nails done or buying a few cases of beer a month. The difference being that it's no longer PC. Yes, smoking kills. You can scream it from the rooftops and while I agree that second hand smoke can/will take years, possibly decades to kill an innocent person... my sister in law died instantly at the hand of a buzzed driver! And think of all the innocent lives taken at the hand of those that feel their text message is oh so uber important. I'm just curious... Do you all alienate your children from family members who perform these acts as well??

 

[RachaelA]

I guess this thread could have evolved many different ways. Not surprisingly, it went with smokers are evil and will destroy the world if not stopped! Yes, I'm a 2 month converted evil e-smoker! Sue me.

But in the true nature of this thread... I'll jump in with my irritations in regards to the original post in this thread.

DH and I are both self-employed and it irritates me to no end when folks complain about the cost of (what I consider) necessities while affording their luxuries. People 'won't' afford health insurance, flood insurance, preventative dental appointments, etc. yet can find the money for vacations, fake nails, hair appointments and cell phones. It burns me to no end to hear mass media fall into the, "the gov't needs to provide because the public can't afford" garbage while folks walk around in their name brand clothes and tennis shoes. We spend more than what an average salary is on all the different types of insurance we are required to carry including health insurance yet we are expected to provide the basic necessities for those that can drive an Escalade??

Now my response to what the original thread evolved into:

Yes, smokes are expensive but no more than a cell phone bill and getting your nails done or buying a few cases of beer a month. The difference being that it's no longer PC. Yes, smoking kills. You can scream it from the rooftops and while I agree that second hand smoke can/will take years, possibly decades to kill an innocent person... my sister in law died instantly at the hand of a buzzed driver! And think of all the innocent lives taken at the hand of those that feel their text message is oh so uber important. I'm just curious... Do you all alienate your children from family members who perform these acts as well??

Will I not let my child in the car with people who drink and drive or text and drive? Of course!

 

[DisneyAndRedSox]

I'm a nurse, and all 3 of the hospitals I have worked at in have been nonsmoking facilities...that means patients, staff, and visitors cannot smoke anywhere on campus. You would be shocked how many new mom's (I do OB) will hide in the bathrooms in their rooms and sneak a smoke. Like we won't notice!

My Mom was in the hospital a month ago and it is a smoke-free property. It is amazing how many people I saw smoking outside the main entrance, standing right next to the "No Smoking on Hospital Property" sign. Some were visitors, but some were obviously patients as they were dragging around an IV pole.

 

[PatsMom]

I am not a smoker. My parents were when I was young but when my younger sister started getting sick and the pediatrician told my parents it was due to them smoking in the home they both quit. It took my Mom longer than my Dad, but she did kick it.

My FIL has been smoking for 40+ years. He has had 4 heart attacks and other health issues. Yet he did not quit. I was never one to judge smokers. I don't like the smell of it and was happy when I could leave a restaurant/bar without smelling like smoke once the law was passed here, but I just thought everyone has their vices and even some sort of bad habit (my diet is seriously horrendous and I can't seem to get it together even for health reasons). I never thought it was selfish to smoke until....last Monday I sat in a hospital waiting room for 15 hours with my husband as his father had a huge tumor removed from his throat. He has to go in for another surgery because the cancer has spread to lymph nodes. He has a feeding tube because he cannot swallow. My husband is emotionally drained from worry and caring for his father. Yet, FIL smoked a cigarette the morning we picked him up to take him to surgery. DH is paying to have his father's home totally cleaned not by a maid service but by a service that comes in to clean homes after fires and hurricane damage. He is trying to reduce the smoke smell as much as possible to make quitting easier for his Dad. I hope it works. Now I see the impact smoking can have

I don't understand why they are emphasizing quitting? If the cancer is in the lymph nodes, even chemo is only going to slow it down. And if he has heart problems, the chemo can be bad for that as well. My Dad died of lung cancer. By the time we knew he had it, the cancer had spread to the lymph nodes and to the brain. One of my great regrets about the entire experience was I was one of the one's who convinced him to do the chemo to try to slow down the cancer. I think it took what was left of his "good time".

So we took him home to his dog and his ashtray. He continued to smoke right up until the end. In fact, one of the last things I did for him, was to light his last cigarette. Seemed kind of pointless to quit at Stage 4.

For what its worth, I haven't smoked in five years. Quitting was horribly hard. Three years after I quit I was diagnosed with bladder cancer. That is an ongoing battle. I know several others with BC who are struggling to quit. Even though BC has a horrible recurrence rate and smoking seems to increase the probability of a recurrence.

I allow people to smoke on my deck. My husband still smokes - outside. I don't care for the smell when he comes in, but he just isn't able to quit despite numerous attempts.

We thought about trying the e-cig after my cancer diagnosis but the more I read about it the less I like it. There may be no smoke smell, but there are tons of chemicals in the vapor. And it is the chemicals that cause bladder cancer, not the tar and nicotine.

 

[lakelandgal70]

My mother constantly complained she never had any money. Well between her and my sis(who lives with my parents) they were spending 400-600bucks a month on cigs. Um hello?? If I had an addiction that cost that much I would have to give it up. Mom did stop smoking as far as I know but my sis started again. I have no idea how she affords it on disability income. I too get tired of people that smoke saying they have no money. I mean it seems like a no brainer. Stop smoking, more money.

ETA: No I don't think smokers are evil. This is still a free country and if someone wants to smoke they can.

 

[angierae]

Yes, smokes are expensive but no more than a cell phone bill and getting your nails done or buying a few cases of beer a month. The difference being that it's no longer PC.

At $5/pack (and I think it's more than that) you're talking at least $150 a month in cigarettes for one pack-a-day smoker. One cell phone does not cost $150 a month, even with a data plan. Getting your nails done every two weeks for, say, $25 is $50 a month, not $150.

In a household with say, one kid and two adult smokers, you're spending somewhere around $300 a month in cigs. I could buy groceries for a family of 3 for $300 a month no problem.

It's expensive. It's also very, very hard to quit. My father died of lung cancer still smoking because he couldn't quit. My sister currently has metastatic lung cancer (she did quit) but my other siblings who were smokers still won't quit even after seeing how destroyed my sister's life and health are.

I also do not feel sorry for ANYONE my age (35) or so that smokes, because you knew FULL WELL when you started that they were addictive, unhealthy, etc. I might forgive our parents or grandparents' generations because smoking was not seen as unhealthy or bad when they were young. But a smoker under 40 knew full well what they were getting into when they started.

 

[pannm]

Yes, smoking kills. You can scream it from the rooftops and while I agree that second hand smoke can/will take years, possibly decades to kill an innocent person... my sister in law died instantly at the hand of a buzzed driver! And think of all the innocent lives taken at the hand of those that feel their text message is oh so uber important. I'm just curious... Do you all alienate your children from family members who perform these acts as well??

To me, in my orig. post (I am the OP), do get mad at people wo do these things as well. I stated in the orig. post the word "VICES" many times.

The reason why I chose 'smoking' mainly is becase that is the exact issue that I delt with- if it would have been a person who had delt with alcoholic drinks and buying those types of things, or a person who dresses in expensive clothing and can't afford clothing for her kids- it would have been said. I, myself, deal with the "I'm a smoker, so I cannot afford _______ for my kids" issue...so that is what I addressed.

People who put their 'vices and extra wants and desires' ahead of taking proper care of their kids aren't very good parents. I am not talking about the parents who supply everything for their kids that they need- I'm talking about the kids/families that have to go get things like free school supplies from people who've donated them because the parents would rather buy cigs...or what ever else for THEMSELVES...It SUCKS for those of us who DONATE A LOT of items to help out those in need, if those in need spend money foolishly.

 

[pannm]

I think most non-smokers seriously underestimate the difficulty of quitting....

I know that it's difficult...it's hard to stop any vice. I know a lot about that and what's involved. The fact is, if you cannot afford to support your family and need to take donations from people-you shouldn't be complaining about how much you spend on your vice to people who donate to community needs.

 

[pannm]

At $5/pack (and I think it's more than that) you're talking at least $150 a month in cigarettes for one pack-a-day smoker. One cell phone does not cost $150 a month, even with a data plan. Getting your nails done every two weeks for, say, $25 is $50 a month, not $150.
.

This person I spoke to spends over $50 a WEEK for ciggs. Yes, it is very expensive. BUT, All of those other things are expensive too- because if you don't have the "$25 or $50 a month" to buy things your kids need- then people cannot afford even those small 'pleasures for themselves'...I've heard of/seen/spoken to people who'll go to get a facial once a month and their kids were on the free lunch program at school. (I worked for the director of food service)...and even though that facial was less than the cost of smoking each month- that lady still couldn't afford it because she didn't have the money for it obviously!

It's not so much the "AMOUNT" that is spent on unneeded things, it's the fact that the amount of money being spent needs to be used elsewhere if family members are going with out their NEEDS. NEEDS should ALWAYS be taken care of before any wants can be purchased.

 

[angierae]

It's not so much the "AMOUNT" that is spent on unneeded things, it's the fact that the amount of money being spent needs to be used elsewhere if family members are going with out their NEEDS. NEEDS should ALWAYS be taken care of before any wants can be purchased.

I totally agree that all "wants" should come after all "needs" are met, definitely.

 

[TiggerTails57]

I hate smoke, and smoking I think it's worse being an ex-smoker.......I quit cold turkey over 25 years ago and never looked back.

I just found out last month my son has started to smoke!
DH and I used to send him $$ to help him out every so often........NOT ANY MORE!

 

[luvthemouse71]

I dont think smokers realize just how much they stink- that smoke gets everywhere. Often, you can smell them before you see them.

Its hard to quit but not impossible. Any parent with any kind of responsibility would at least try.

 

[mrsklamc]

I call major BS on saying that smoking is like a drug addiction.

No, it's not like a drug addiction....it IS a drug addiction. Some people's brains react differently than others so if it wasn't hard for you that's great for you...but studies have shown that nicotine can be harder to quit than heroin.