How fast it all changed.

[hegsag]

Sending prayers

 

[olliesmom]

I have no words other than I am so sorry and my heart has broken for you and your family reading through this thread. It sounds like you are an incredible partner in facing such horrendous battle and I wish you and your family peace and strength in the coming days and weeks. There is nothing I can say that accurately conveys how much I hate cancer and what it does to the most wonderful people and families. You will all be in my prayers and I hope that you are surrounded by love and support to carry you when you feel like you just can't put one foot in front of the other. In the smallest of things, we are always here to listen.

You mentioned looking for support for your children - I don't know where in Ontario you are, but Gilda's Club in Toronto is an amazing organization. Even if you are outside of Toronto, they may be a good contact that can refer you to a more local support group. The Wellspring cancer support organization is also wonderful with a number of locations in Ontario and runs a number of online programs too: https://wellspring.ca/online-resources/

The Wellspring pancreatic cancer support and money matters programs might be particularly helpful - you can access a telephone or web (Skype, Facetime) consult with a "money matters" case manager within a day or two, I believe and they may have some helpful advice in terms of the additional financial stress you are dealing with.

 

[Wendy31]

I am so, so sorry you didn't receive better news today.

I am praying for your DH, for you, & for your children...

 

[MamaBelle4]

I don't have words to express how sorry I am for the diagnosis you received. You, your kids and your DH are in my nightly prayers.

Please take care.

 

[Dumbo777]

Sending lots of prayers.

 

[Neesy228]

Cancer is just utterly wretched. I’m so sorry.

“You never know how strong you really are until strong is the only choice you have.”

Wishing you peace in the chaos. Wisdom in the decision making. Courage and strength for you and your DH.

You remain in my thoughts.

 

[low-key]

I dont want to sound flippant, but only God knows when he dies, he is alive , then there is a chance, he might go quick, might surprise everyone and get 5 years, might end up beating it, you dont know cause your not God, prepare for the worse but dont you let it defeat you , fight to win

 

[OhhBother]

I am so sorry. And I'm so ashamed that I've been mad at my husband over something stupid for the past two days. I will honor you and your husband by cherishing the gifts I've been given. I hope it gives you some peace to know that your strength and grace have touched hearts of people you'll never meet. You are in my prayers.

 

[focusondisney]

I'm so sorry to read your update. I am wishing you & your family strength & courage. We are here for you.

 

[manning]

Clinical trials for pancreatic cancer might give you a chance to try new targeted therapy, chemotherapy drugs, immunotherapy treatments or vaccines

 

[BadgerGirl84]

My heart breaks for your husband, you and your children.

 

[NotUrsula]

The medication is hydromorphone. Administered intravenously, it is about 7X stronger than intravenous morphine, and 20X stronger than oral morphine. It is the standard opiate given for acute pancreatic pain, and even that is sometimes not enough.

I am very sorry to hear your news.

I lost my father to lung cancer when I was 12, and because of that I'm going to say something that sort of flies in the face of the usual advice not to let cancer change your children's routine more than necessary. Only you know your kids and your husband well enough to know what to do, but be aware of this truth: you can always catch up on schoolwork, but you can never catch up on time with a parent who passes young. I was the youngest and the only one still in school when my Dad was diagnosed. My mother threw the truancy rules out the window, and for the rest of Dad's life, whenever he had a good day I spent it with him instead of in school. That was over 40 years ago, and I am still profoundly grateful to her for it.

 

[Snowflakey]

Oh dear lord. I'm literally crying. You're thread has touched me in such a way and I feel so helpless that I can't do more.

My prayers are real and I know you are being taken care of, although it may not seem at this time. Your grace, strength and support is something all of us that is reading your thread admires. YOU ARE amazing.

Don't be afraid to ask for any help. This is the time for it. I'd be happy to send a gift card or anything - you just let us know.

Each day is a gift - live in the moment. Always here....

 

[AnnaFloridaLover]

I'm so sorry to hear the latest update. It's truly heartbreaking news. Hugs to your family. You are showing an incredible amount of strength during this time.

 

[rodeo65]

Good morning and as always thank you all for your support, advice and prayers. Even though I am responding sporadically, I am reading everything and making notes and bookmarks on all the information shared here.

Ursula, I'm kind of taking a page from your mother's book in terms of the school attendance. I've informed all teachers and staff at the school what is happening and the kids have been missing classes when needed. Not just to spend time with him but if it's a day like today when we just got the news we did last night - no one went in this morning. I think they may work their way there eventually today, but as a family who previously home schooled, I am not terribly worried about them missing this semester. In fact I expect it. They'll make it up later - summer school, online, whatever. I was more concerned about not allowing the tail end of their childhoods to be marked by too much immersion in their dad's cancer decline. They so far seem to want to see the decent days and kind of hide from the rest, which I completely understand. I'd like to hide from it too.

Right - hydromorphone. He spent the night in the ER. No bed available as of 10pm last night, so I hope the meds allowed him to sleep some with all the noise and activity.

Thank you Snowflakey for the kind words but I really don't feel strong and graceful. This thread has become my lifeline. Having somewhere to dump it all where I can be crying as I do so and no one can see it helps. The advice helps, the support helps.

And you're right low-key, as long as he's alive, we fight. It's pretty much what I told him as I left last night - get it all out and then lets come back today ready to take it on. I hope I find him in that spirit when I get there. He was not as I left.

 

[3DisneyBuggs]

Im so sorry to hear the diagnosis. My Dad had pancreatic cancer but he was lucky as they were able to do the Whipple. I was hoping your DH would be able to have it as well. Cancer is horrid- 12 years later, much chemo and radiation, my Dad is surviving. Praying your DH gains some strength and can fight.

 

[antmaril]

Rodeo. I am very sorry to hear this news. I know how overwhelming it is. Continued prayers for all of you. My late husband got pain relief from Dilaudid. Hopefully, they will get his pain under control ASAP.

 

[Snowflakey]

Rodeo - do you have family close by that is helping? Do your DH have siblings? Just making sure you are surrounded by support.....

 

[ronandannette]

While it doesn’t seem quite right to “like” your posts, please know it’s just a gesture to reassure you that you’re being heard and cared for. Trusting that grace will be sufficient for you this day, whatever it may bring.

 

[720L]

I am so sorry. No words. Praying for all of you.