Duggar announcement on tomorrow's Today show!

[wilma-bride]

While it would not be my personal choice to have 19 kids, I have to say (from what little I have seen - they are not as big here in the UK as they are in the US) that the children are remarkably well behaved so they are clearly doing something right

And to those who commented on whether the older children should 'bring up' the younger ones, again (from my limited knowledge) I haven't seen any evidence of the older ones doing hte 'raising', merely helping out their parents with the little ones.

My DDs, 17 and 18, look after their younger brother during school holidays while me and their Step-Dad work. Does that mean they are 'raising' my child - no, it doesn't. The way I figure it, if I don't have to pay someone outside of the home for childcare, the family has more money for days out, eating out, trips to WDW etc

I say good luck to the Duggars - whatever works for them

 

[FredinFL]

It's really only since this generation I think that older siblings have been given much less to do regarding the younger ones. When I was a kid, at 12 I was watching my baby nephew and taking him all over with me during the summer. It never occurred to me to mind doing it. We had fun, it gave my sister a break, it was.

 

[Nayan]

I'll admit, I don't get "Dugar hate". The kids seem happy enough, they seem like nice people. 20 kids is waaaaaay more than I'd ever want, but no one is saying I have to have 20. They support them all. What makes "your" way so much better? Just a general question.

To me, a parent is supposed to take care of and spend time with their children. To hand them off to a 'buddy' is shunning quite a bit of responsibility. You bred them, you diaper/feed/care for them. Not to mention the huge amount of resources all of those kids use. The world is populated enough and if we have each of those kids going out and having huge families of their own the earth can't take it.

 

[FredinFL]

I think the world could use more people like the Dugar kids. So, the people like the Dugar's should stop having more kids because we can't stop the inner city people from popping out their welfare kids all over the place?

As long as they can afford to take care of them, I don't see a problem. I also see nothing wrong with the buddyup system. Older kids helping to watch the younger kids isn't a new thing.

 

[Saphire]

As long as they can afford to take care of them, I don't see a problem. I also see nothing wrong with the buddyup system. Older kids helping to watch the younger kids isn't a new thing.

Again, I agree. Historically, women had many children and those older children helped run the household, including caring for the little ones. There is nothing disgraceful about helping with younger kids, it is just not a modern idea. It is obviously working out for them. Nobody can deny the family seems well adjusted and happy.

 

[Hollywoodhaha]

Are the Duggars hurting you? No.
Nobody is forcing you to watch the show. People need to stop being judgemental.

They are happy and living life how THEY want! She has a lot of kids? It is only hurting herself, no one else!

 

[SaraJayne]

Isn't Anna an only child? She doesn't seem like quite that much of a push over to me. Maybe the husband doesn't want that many kids either. They don't seem to be overly controlling of their kids to me.

Anna is one of 5.

Oops, I was wrong. I see the correct number was posted earlier.

 

[KrysiaG]

They most certianly DO have everything to do with it being #19. Every baby puts stress on moms body and saps more resources. She doesn't have adequate recovery time in between so she is more depleted gonig into each pregnancy. Add that to her advanced maternal age, multiple c-sections, and her tendency to eclampsia and that would make each preganacy higher risk than the last. It would be medically irresponsible to try to have any more at this point.

ETA: actually, the older the mother the greater the odds are that she will have eclampsia, and having had it with one pregnancy significantly increases the risk with future pregnancies.

absolutely!

I don't judge the Duggars, their lifestyle choice or anything like that. But, my logical thinking is the above (about the risks to her health and life - not about the # of kids they have). PERSONALLY, I wouldn't risk my life to have anymore at the risk of leaving my children motherless. But, it's her choice/their choice.

 

[SaraJayne]

Again, I agree. Historically, women had many children and those older children helped run the household, including caring for the little ones. There is nothing disgraceful about helping with younger kids, it is just not a modern idea. It is obviously working out for them. Nobody can deny the family seems well adjusted and happy.

Historically, many children didn't make it alive to adulthood. So even if a woman birthed 10 children, maybe only 4 or 5 made it past childhood.

 

[luvmy3]

Are the Duggars hurting you? No.
Nobody is forcing you to watch the show. People need to stop being judgemental.

They are happy and living life how THEY want! She has a lot of kids? It is only hurting herself, no one else!

Not quite, the Duggar's parade their life on TV, as soon as you do that you open yourself up for judgement. Are only those who feel positive about the Duggar's allowed to judge them? Sorry, don't think so.

 

[KrysiaG]

Anna and the husband don't want 20 kids, they want a few, I think that she said 3 or 4 on one of the shows.

I heard the same thing.

 

[KrysiaG]

Michael James was born yesterday. around 8#10oz

Yayy! Wonderful news!

 

[KrysiaG]

Not quite, the Duggar's parade their life on TV, as soon as you do that you open yourself up for judgement. Are only those who feel positive about the Duggar's allowed to judge them? Sorry, don't think so.

oh they absolutely realize they set themselves up to be judged by the entire world with that show. They agreed to do it - it was their choice. And I do think everyone is entitled to an opinion about whether they would risk their already life to try for another baby the way Michelle has. I mean, I have nothing against the # of kids they have (they all seem like a great family), but logically I would have to put my health as an importance and think about the risk and the complications I would be purposely putting on myself to try for baby #20. That's me though, a typical libra weighing each side of the scale. Even if I personally wanted baby #20, I wouldn't try for it just based on the major complications, several c-sections and risks I would be putting myself under. But, that's me. Just my opinion. Whether the Duggars go for #20 or not has no bearing on me and my life - but personally, I wouldn't risk it.

 

[Hollywoodhaha]

They showed his picture on the today show. He is so cute!

 

[DawnM]

They also said "the parents have not yet chosen a name" so I have no idea what that is about. Does that mean the name is NOT Michael James?

Dawn

They showed his picture on the today show. He is so cute!

 

[SaraJayne]

They also said "the parents have not yet chosen a name" so I have no idea what that is about. Does that mean the name is NOT Michael James?

Dawn

An article I read said "they aren't publically releasing the name". Though it's already out there.

 

[daughtersrus]

Michael James was born yesterday. around 8#10oz

So they're going with the letter M.

 

[SydSim]

I think that its better to not continue to have children after a certain age, and after a certain number of pregnancies. I also think that there comes a time when you need to think about the children you already have, and not your selfish need to keep having babies. I also think they are hypocrites who didn't let their children watch TV yet had no problem putting them on TV to make money. (I can't say whether that belief has changed since I don't keep up with them) I also don't think a parent should force their children to be caregivers to all the kids they choose to have.
So, in essence there are things that I think are wrong with the Duggar's but I'm hardly perfect so I don't consider "my" way better, but there is definitely a better way IMO.
Having said that, there are things that are right with their family, they are happy, well behaved and very close. There are plenty of traditional families who I can't say that about.

See, I view those things a little differently (so funny how different people can see the same thing - totally different).

About the age things....I guess that's subjective...who decides what age is too old? Some would say 35, some 40, etc.

Also, who decides how many is too many? Some say enough to replace yourself (2), some say 3, some say "who cares".

I'm trying to understand the "selfish need" to have children thing. I would think it would be perceived as being selfish if you didn't want kids (like you don't want to share your things, or change your lifestyle, or spend money, etc. And no, not saying that those are my views, just that they could be some people's views).

The hypocrite things....I feel that they don't wish for their kids to watch tv because of the trash that's on it. (and I love tv - and watch a lot of the trash). They don't wish for that to feed their children's impressionable minds. But, I'd put money on it that if 99% of the tv programs shared their opinion of good, Christian values, then it probably wouldn't be such an issue. Showcasing their family is counteracting the other shows that are out there.....hopefully to have alternate programs for others who lead similar lifestyles. There are probably numerous families who would prefer that their children watch The Duggars, instead of something like "Tiny & Toya" or Bad Girls Club I don't believe that they are allowing people to watch them live their lives for the money. But that's my view


As for older sibs helping out with the younger ones....Disers are always commenting on how everyone in the household needs to help. They all seem to have important roles in this large family......and it seems to work for them.

As for people feeling that she shouldn't risk her life with another pregnancy.......I suppose no woman with health issues (diabetes, high blood pressure, cancer history) should have babies then.

 

[lillygator]

these people are so brainwashed its sick....

 

[Planogirl]

As for people feeling that she shouldn't risk her life with another pregnancy.......I suppose no woman with health issues (diabetes, high blood pressure, cancer history) should have babies then.

I think that there's a vast difference between having baby number 1 (or 2 or 3...well you get the picture) than having baby number 20. Otherwise I agree pretty much with what you said.