Duggar announcement on tomorrow's Today show!

[honugirl]

I do believe there are some medical conditions that women have that shouldn't have kids. This is clouded by my view after dealing with my own rare disease that could be genetic. I wouldn't wish my disease on my worst enemy, let alone my own flesh and blood. It would be irresponsible for me to play the genetic lottery and potentially put the gun to my own kid's head. But once again, I have a very dangerous, deadly, incredibly complex, hard to diagnose disease that affects every part of your body, so I'll reiterate that my judgement is clouded by that.

 

[ChattaAlley]

I think the Duggers do better at raising their 20 then most do at raising 1. They have raised well rounded, respectful children. Congrats to the newest Dugger.

 

[luvmy3]

See, I view those things a little differently (so funny how different people can see the same thing - totally different).

About the age things....I guess that's subjective...who decides what age is too old? Some would say 35, some 40, etc.

Also, who decides how many is too many? Some say enough to replace yourself (2), some say 3, some say "who cares".



I'm trying to understand the "selfish need" to have children thing. I would think it would be perceived as being selfish if you didn't want kids (like you don't want to share your things, or change your lifestyle, or spend money, etc. And no, not saying that those are my views, just that they could be some people's views).

The hypocrite things....I feel that they don't wish for their kids to watch tv because of the trash that's on it. (and I love tv - and watch a lot of the trash). They don't wish for that to feed their children's impressionable minds. But, I'd put money on it that if 99% of the tv programs shared their opinion of good, Christian values, then it probably wouldn't be such an issue. Showcasing their family is counteracting the other shows that are out there.....hopefully to have alternate programs for others who lead similar lifestyles. There are probably numerous families who would prefer that their children watch The Duggars, instead of something like "Tiny & Toya" or Bad Girls Club I don't believe that they are allowing people to watch them live their lives for the money. But that's my view


As for older sibs helping out with the younger ones....Disers are always commenting on how everyone in the household needs to help. They all seem to have important roles in this large family......and it seems to work for them.

As for people feeling that she shouldn't risk her life with another pregnancy.......I suppose no woman with health issues (diabetes, high blood pressure, cancer history) should have babies then.

I would say medical research decides Its not like we don't know the risks of pregnancy when a woman ages, or the risks involved after so many pregnancies.

The whole TV thing and them being hypocrites, I don't believe that needs any explanation. They add to the trash on TV, whether they think they do or not, a show doesn't have to have sex, foul language and violence to be part of generation trash TV. A family that is willing to put their lives out there for the world to see for money is part of that trash, IMO.

I don't have a problem with older kids helping out, I expect my own dd to help out but I would be extremely selfish if I just kept having babies with the expectation she has to help. Like I said, they seem happy, maybe they love being a caretakers to their siblings, its just not something I'd do to my kids.

What the Duggar's do doesn't effect me in the least, and I honestly don't care what happens within their family. However, as long as they are willing to share their "life" with us, I'll be willing to share my opinions about their life

 

[AndreaDM]

I agree. I really enjoy their show. Jackson and Johanna make me laugh out loud. All of the children seem very happy and very much loved. While I am sure some of it is scripted, I find it hard to believe that children that young can "act".

I have met them in real life several times and I can tell you, Johannah is the firecracker of the bunch! OMG, she had me rolling, so funny! I also think if any of them go rogue, it will be her!

 

[palavra]

It is perfectly valid for someone standing outside looking in. I happen to believe it is irresponsible to have a history of pregnancy related health issues and continue giving birth. This is MY belief and the belief of some other people I know and it's just as valid as any reason for or against pregnancy that you have.

It is fine for you to have that belief about yourself and your pregnancies, but it really is none of your business what other people decide is right for their lives.

 

[rotlex]

these people are so brainwashed its sick....

Oh absolutely! They actually believe that living together as a family, doing things together as a family, and being open to life, albeit in an extreme way, is the right way to live. How absolutely horrible!

Maybe they sholud buy a TV for each kids room, or better yet, computers, with open web access, so they can accumulate 10's of thousands of posts on internet forums.

 

[CurlyGirl]

I think the Duggers do better at raising their 20 then most do at raising 1. They have raised well rounded, respectful children. Congrats to the newest Dugger.

Do you know them in person to say that they're well rounded? How can you tell that someone is well rounded based on what you see on a tv show?

 

[CurlyGirl]

Anna and the husband don't want 20 kids, they want a few, I think that she said 3 or 4 on one of the shows.

I thought that, in their marriage vows, they said they would welcome as many children as God was willing to give them? So now they're making the decision for God?

 

[Metro West]

Not quite, the Duggar's parade their life on TV, as soon as you do that you open yourself up for judgement. Are only those who feel positive about the Duggar's allowed to judge them? Sorry, don't think so.

I agree.

 

[Heidict]

I'll admit, I don't get "Dugar hate". The kids seem happy enough, they seem like nice people. 20 kids is waaaaaay more than I'd ever want, but no one is saying I have to have 20. They support them all. What makes "your" way so much better? Just a general question.

I just don't understand it either. People seem to generate so much disgust and hate for something

these people are so brainwashed its sick....

Brainwashed? Because they don't believe how you do, they have to be brainwashed?

I think the Duggers do better at raising their 20 then most do at raising 1. They have raised well rounded, respectful children. Congrats to the newest Dugger.

I agree. They are happy, law abiding, drug and alcohol free, no teen pregnancies, respectful. What is wrong with this picture? I guess it would better if they were more like a lot of kids out there? Sneaking out of the house, getting drug or high and getting pregnant before finishing high school.

Heck there are shows dedicated to foul mouth, alcoholic and lose kids out there and they seems to get popular because of their disgusting behavior. I would rather have my child watching the Duggars then garbage like Jersey Shore, 16 and Pregnant, Skins and a slew of other shows out there.

 

[cinabug]

It is fine for you to have that belief about yourself and your pregnancies, but it really is none of your business what other people decide is right for their lives.

It's all of our business if we take an interest. They're on TV. They're inviting our judgement. Of course we don't get to decide, but we can certainly cluck our tongues at their choices. If they wanted to be private about it, they should not have signed up for a mainstream reality TV show.

I don't know these people, but I do know two quiver-full families and they seem to have cornered the market on being judgmental. I work with one of the fathers and he sat around our staff room table, with two women who have have major pregnancy issues, and informed us all that God gives them so many children because he knows that they are worthy of having those children. So, I guess my coworker and I were not worthy in his eyes? That meth-head down the street who has manged to produce a bunch of kids was worthy?

Of course the Duggars can have as many children as they want, but when they set themselves up to be the very public face of this belief system, they should expect to take some of the heat for the actions of their fellow believers. By the way, many of the quiver-full families do not manage as well as the Duggars do to support their bevies of children financially, so there's another open door for the rest of society to judge the practice.

 

[momof1princess]

I just don't understand it either. People seem to generate so much disgust and hate for something

Brainwashed? Because they don't believe how you do, they have to be brainwashed?

I agree. They are happy, law abiding, drug and alcohol free, no teen pregnancies, respectful. What is wrong with this picture? I guess it would better if they were more like a lot of kids out there? Sneaking out of the house, getting drug or high and getting pregnant before finishing high school.

Heck there are shows dedicated to foul mouth, alcoholic and lose kids out there and they seems to get popular because of their disgusting behavior. I would rather have my child watching the Duggars then garbage like Jersey Shore, 16 and Pregnant, Skins and a slew of other shows out there.

i may not agree with EVERYTHING the duggars say or do, but MTE!

 

[FredinFL]

I thought that, in their marriage vows, they said they would welcome as many children as God was willing to give them? So now they're making the decision for God?

No, in another post I stated they said if God only granted them 2 or 3 they would be happy, but would welcome whatever children he decided to bless them with...something like that, the exact quote is in my other post.

 

[ChattaAlley]

Do you know them in person to say that they're well rounded? How can you tell that someone is well rounded based on what you see on a tv show?

Do you know them? I would think since they are on TV and in the media that I can get a pretty fair picture of how they are. I do not hear any stories on TMZ or any other crazy gossip blog . . . . Oh no another Dugger teen got herself pregnant....or Teen Dugger boys found in local strip club after curfew. Yeah I think I got a better picture of them then you.

 

[minkydog]

I don't know these people, but I do know two quiver-full families and they seem to have cornered the market on being judgmental. I work with one of the fathers and he sat around our staff room table, with two women who have have major pregnancy issues, and informed us all that God gives them so many children because he knows that they are worthy of having those children. So, I guess my coworker and I were not worthy in his eyes? That meth-head down the street who has manged to produce a bunch of kids was worthy?

I hate when people do things like that. Some people are totally clueless.

I've known 2 quiver-full familes and both were delightful. One family had 6 kids the other had 10,and al of them were well-behaved and delightful. All 16 have been homeschooled and so far 8 of them are in college or have graduated. Two are in medical school.

Now, would *I* like to do that? Not really. I would have loved to have more children, but it wasn't in the cards. When we hear people make those kinds of blanket statements I immediately understand that they are inflexible and maybe slightly entitled. Some of them really do believe that if they do all the right things and have the right beliefs that God will only give them good things because they obviously deserve them.

After we had our son, Christian, who is profoundly mentally handicapped, I entertained a few fools who tried to pray him back to normal. When that didn't work, they blamed us--there must be sin in our lifes. "Don't you WANT him to be made whole?" Well, yes we'd love that. However, I don't think it's up to me to dictate to God how he's going to work this out. I'm sure he has a plan here. Finally, one woman castigated me for "inflicting the world" with my "retard" baby when I could have just as easily "opted out" before birth".I mean, who says this stuff? We were at lunch together and I just excused myself before I had to kill her with my bare hands.

 

[luvmy3]

Do you know them? I would think since they are on TV and in the media that I can get a pretty fair picture of how they are. I do not hear any stories on TMZ or any other crazy gossip blog . . . . Oh no another Dugger teen got herself pregnant....or Teen Dugger boys found in local strip club after curfew. Yeah I think I got a better picture of them then you.

Its not really all that difficult to raise kids that don't go and get themselves pregnant or go to strip clubs after curfew. Millions of parents manage to do it just fine

 

[princessmom29]

According to the article I just read
http://celebs.gather.com/viewArticle.action?articleId=281474979449642
Josie was in the care of sister Jill, who is 20 years old, not a "kid".

And since, as you say, the teenage girls have been raising the youngers all along, they are probably better equiped to handle the care of a child than many 30 year old first time mothers.

I wouldn't leave my baby, who was perfectly healthy with a 20 year old and travel out of the country. They can say waht they want about her health, but the fact remains that she was a micopremiee and unti lthe age of 5 is more suceptable to episodes just like what happened when she was in the care of these girls. It was irresponsible to leave her with them.

I think that its better to not continue to have children after a certain age, and after a certain number of pregnancies. I also think that there comes a time when you need to think about the children you already have, and not your selfish need to keep having babies. I also think they are hypocrites who didn't let their children watch TV yet had no problem putting them on TV to make money. (I can't say whether that belief has changed since I don't keep up with them) I also don't think a parent should force their children to be caregivers to all the kids they choose to have.
So, in essence there are things that I think are wrong with the Duggar's but I'm hardly perfect so I don't consider "my" way better, but there is definitely a better way IMO.
Having said that, there are things that are right with their family, they are happy, well behaved and very close. There are plenty of traditional families who I can't say that about.

This exactly. It is medically irresponsible for her to have any omre, and siblings helping out around the house and siblings raising thier brothers and sisters are two different things. Thier "buddy system" amounts to a child raising another child that they didn't even give birth to.

I think the world could use more people like the Dugar kids. So, the people like the Dugar's should stop having more kids because we can't stop the inner city people from popping out their welfare kids all over the place?

As long as they can afford to take care of them, I don't see a problem. I also see nothing wrong with the buddyup system. Older kids helping to watch the younger kids isn't a new thing.

Anyone who has more children than they can activelyt be a parent to should stop having them. Once it is decessary to ask a teen age girl to raise the babies you are popping out one after the other it is time to stop havingthem, no matter who you are. If you cannot be a parent, don't bring the child inot the world. The Duggars cannot parent the children they already have. They are passing those duties on to the older girls.

 

[dislal]

So what was the announcement I missed it this morning.

 

[DWGal210]

I don't understand the "hate" either.

I do find it interesting that even though we ( general we, not necessarily we on the Dis) are chastised constantly to not judge people, be accepting & respectful of how people lead their own lives, etc - that all gets thrown out when you're talking about someone with a large family.

I'm probably more sensitive b/c I'm the oldest of 6. My mom & dad have had some really odd & downright rude things said to them about why the heck they'd want 6 kids.

My 2 cents: I'll respect your life & your choices, you respect mine. We don't all have to want or even understand each others lives, but let's make respect a 2 way street. Fair enough?

 

[princessmom29]

Oh absolutely! They actually believe that living together as a family, doing things together as a family, and being open to life, albeit in an extreme way, is the right way to live. How absolutely horrible!

Maybe they sholud buy a TV for each kids room, or better yet, computers, with open web access, so they can accumulate 10's of thousands of posts on internet forums.

no, I don't see them as open to life at all. They are only really open to their version of what life should be. They pay lip service to exposing the kids to this or that, and take them places, but they are absolutely NOT open to the kids having real relationships with anyone who doesn't think like them. My problem is that the girls have NO option to NOT perpetuate this lifestyle. The girls have no life skills except for those of a wife and mother. How in the world do you think one of them could choose to leave this family and strike out on thier own? They can't because they haven't been taught he skills necessary to be independent. They have been taught all their lives thatthe only acceptable role for them is daughter or wife and mother. The only acceptable suitors for these girls are those who are also part of this lifestlye. I just think they should have the choice NOT to be a part of this if they don't want to. They are being raised so that the option is taken away from them becuase they don't have any ability to strike out on thier own and make it. They have no marketable skills.