Black-tie requested…wedding apparel issues. 2nd update -post 137

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

The plan for this wedding is so complicated they need to have a website and FAQ section?............LOL. Sounds like good reason to not attend.

A wedding website is extremely common these days most of them being from The Knot IME. I haven't been to a wedding without one, fancy, or low-key.

It's just a way for people to share a bit more about themselves as a couple (usually story of how they met, how they got engaged), some photos (usually engagement photos), give information about the venue and pertinent information like parking, addresses, timing, attire if need be, hotel accommodations if they've blocked rooms out, then there can be an FAQ which sometimes includes information about the wedding itself and sometimes it's where the info for the venue is at. Then there's information about the registry. Much of this is too much information to put in the invite so wedding websites have been quite normal.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

And what on earth is a jumpsuit in this context?

I can't go to a store without seeing a nice jumpsuit, it's everywhere. Many that I see are of the more dressier style meant to be chic.

I personally can never wear a jumpsuit, my short torso would look awful in it but my sister-in-law pulls them off very lovely. In fact to father-in-law's wife's nephew's wedding last September she wore a black jumpsuit very nice looking, she paired it with heels (not too tall) and a belt.

 

[ncc1701]

The plan for this wedding is so complicated they need to have a website and FAQ section?............LOL. Sounds like good reason to not attend.

The website (which is most likely is a 3rd party provider) may not be unusual these days. The wedding we went to last year had one. Most of it was about the event venues & schedule, area hotels , restaurants and things to do along with a link to the Registry. The FAQ were about how to get there for people not from the area.
It did have the suggested dress for each event . None were formal.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

It sounds like the bride and groom think black tie means something that it doesn't. Maybe they think it's easier to generalize it by saying black tie and that sends a signal to their guests. They wouldn't be the first couple to use black tie when they don't truly mean it based on what examples they give. I know we've had threads on this before.

All that I find for black tie is usually a bow tie not a tie. But formal has a tie. Semi-formal isn't floor length gowns but formal is.

IMO they should have stuck with saying formal attire for the reception and semi-formal for wedding with mentioning that jumpsuits are acceptable for women for both although it does sound like they haven't separated out the wedding and the reception at all. Perhaps OP might take up the bride by reaching out to her in regards to that part to confirm do they expect the same clothing to be worn for both.

Also IMO this doesn't scream bridezilla to me, I think that gets tossed around too much it's really starting to lose its affect. It does say to me they have a specific look they are going for but aren't doing the best at explaining it.

 

[punkin]

I can't go to a store without seeing a nice jumpsuit, it's everywhere. Many that I see are of the more dressier style meant to be chic.

I personally can never wear a jumpsuit, my short torso would look awful in it but my sister-in-law pulls them off very lovely. In fact to father-in-law's wife's nephew's wedding last September she wore a black jumpsuit very nice looking, she paired it with heels (not too tall) and a belt.

But is a jumpsuit really ever black tie appropriate?

 

[Mrs.AMC]

But is a jumpsuit really ever black tie appropriate?

What else do non-dressing wearing women wear?

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

But is a jumpsuit really ever black tie appropriate?

Well that wasn't your question, it was what was a jumpsuit in this context. I knew immediately what the bride meant.

As for the above question the answer according to brides(.com) is yes a jumpsuit can be black tie...and pretty much exactly how I described it and to a point how HopperFan put in..it's not necessary to have the half gown/half jumpsuit though just to make the jumpsuit work.

• Can I wear a jumpsuit to a black-tie wedding?
  In short, yes! While some jumpsuit styles are laidback and casual, others are actually quite dressy and make for a stunning alternative to a formal floor-length gown.

 

[DLgal]

LOL. The bride doesn't even know what black tie means.

Translation: wear what you want.

 

[disneychrista]

What else do non-dressing wearing women wear?

I'd wear dark slacks, white button down shirt and a nice blazer. The feminine version of the "dark suit."

 

[Lilsia]

If you don't want to go, then don't go. Your SIL is a grown (insert 3 letter word here) man. He will be just fine on his own. I have been to weddings where my husband was in the wedding party and got along just fine talking to the other people at the table.

 

[Mrs.AMC]

I'd wear dark slacks, white button down shirt and a nice blazer. The feminine version of the "dark suit."

That's one options. Or, there's a lot of jump suits out there these days that are just as dressy as a full length gown just way more comfortable.

 

[Lilsia]

A work friend invited me and a couple others to her sons wedding. It was on a Friday. I skipped the ceremony and just came to the reception since it I had to work that day and the reception hall was closer to my house. She acted funny about it. Oh well.

My husbands niece got married about 90 minutes from here. There was a church wedding with a gap before the reception, but they had an outdoor area set up with cocktails and snacks before the reception. When we arrived there, my husbands brother in law, not the brides dad, just married to an aunt, got all bent out of shape. He said the people who were at the cocktail hour must not have come to the church. He kept on about it. I thought to myself, who cares? Maybe they had another event. Or maybe they just drove faster after mass. I always just assumed people who didn’t make the ceremony had a reason. People often go to a lot of trouble and cost to attend weddings.

Growing up, it was mostly just family and close friends that went to the actual ceremony. Everyone else just went to the reception. That is a long day and a big ask for people to commit going to your ceremony and reception when they are not close to you.

 

[Imzadi]

You're right. Black tie is formal not semi formal. And it's not appropriate in a 1 pm church service. And semi formal is not floor length gowns. And what on earth is a jumpsuit in this context? I think the bride just wants to play dress up.

It sounds like the bride and groom think black tie means something that it doesn't. Maybe they think it's easier to generalize it by saying black tie and that sends a signal to their guests. They wouldn't be the first couple to use black tie when they don't truly mean it based on what examples they give.

Yes, it's likely the bride just wants everyone really dressed up during the ceremony, but doesn't know the right terminology. Not "Sunday church best" but something more elegant and dressy, since she says semi-formal. As a PP mentioned, she probably wants nice photos to post and show off.

I do have to wonder what the groomsmen will be wearing. If they are in tuxes too, how will one know, looking at the reception photos and everyone is mingling, which ones are the groomsmen versus the guests? Will a corsage be all that sets them apart? Will they have ascots or different ties than the guests?

 

[tarheelmjfan]

My guess is the "black tie semi-formal" designation was their way of saying men who don't own tuxes don't have to rent one. If they can't come in black tie, they can wear a dark suit. They're also saying that women who don't wear dresses can wear a nice jumpsuit, as long as either is floor length. I don't see a bridezilla here at all. I see someone envisioning their perfect day & making concessions that they wouldn't necessarily choose in an attempt to accommodate their guests. It's entirely possible to find a light weight formal gown. It just may not be one (a general) you already have. To me, the solution is to either go with the flow or decline the invitation.

FWIW, I'm very much anti-Bridezilla & don't agree with the idea that it's your wedding do what you want, regardless of who you hurt in the process. I just don't see this as being one of those instances.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

which ones are the groomsmen versus the guests? Will a corsage be all that sets them apart? Will they have ascots or different ties than the guests?

IME they tend to wear color coordinating suits. Gray being a very common one although that's not quite black tie but can be considered formal but I've seen other colors (I think I remember a dark blue??). Ties typically the same with exception to the groom or a coordinating style like 2 may wear the same one 2 others may wear another one, etc In general you're not going to get confused that easily

 

[QueenIsabella]

Jumpsuit you say?

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Come on...DO IT. You'd be my hero!

OP should definitely go for the gold lame one. I would pay to see that!

Seriously, though--wear what you want.

I do want to say--jumpsuits are a Godsend for my DD19. She's a cellist who occasionally plays professionally. Jumpsuits are way easier to perform in than a ballgown type skirt. I should probably get HER the gold lame one--she could actually look good in it! I, OTOH, would look like one of the golden eggs from Willy Wonka...

 

[lifesavacation]

I love jumpsuits. Wore one last night to a wedding rehearsal dinner and got several compliments. The downside is having to take the whole thing off when you pee

 

[Mrs.AMC]

I love jumpsuits. Wore one last night to a wedding rehearsal dinner and got several compliments. The downside is having to take the whole thing off when you pee

Going pee is a downer, that's so true!

 

[clh2]

Jumpsuit you say?

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Come on...DO IT. You'd be my hero!

The Gold…on it! I’d get more attention than the bride…that is for sure!!!

 

[clh2]

Honestly you may have solved a problem that I would have IF I were to even go ...

Last wedding I was at Mother of Bride wore this cool "jumpsuit" pants dress. And it was semi-formal we were all dressed very nice, suits. That would be very nice to wear in this situation!

Similar to these

View attachment 677364HopperFan…these are all gorgeous! I especially love the black and white one. The bride would freak out at the white pants, that is for sure!!

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These are seriously gorgeous! Love the black and white one…but the bride would freak out if someone was wearing white.