Previously on Biscuit’s Grand Adventure, nieces were be-gowned, breakfast was downed, and Aurora was having a rough morning.
First, thanks to the DIS for not relegating me to the obscurity of abandoned TR’s on the “Completed” board.
I have begun this installment at least three times now and have inexplicably managed to lose it, delete it, or otherwise dispose of it. I am hoping for victory this time around, and if you are reading this, it would appear that I have finally attained it.
Perhaps if I condense things a bit, it might help to move the story along.
We did other cool stuff and then came home.
The End.
Too condensed?
Two updates ago, I left off with Tahlia and I hurtling through the crepuscular maze that is Space Mountain. My daughter's love of the attraction was fully cemented upon our journey through the red tunnel.
The experience of riding that attraction with her is now the first thing that comes to mind when I allow my memories to wander back to that week.
Remaining seated in the attraction for another go is not an option, much to my chagrin, thus we soon found ourselves pulling into the unloading area. Tahlia and I exited the ride and headed down the moving sidewalks of Tomorrow. As we passed the “home of the future”, I pointed out the table and told her about
Len Testa redoing his kitchen in a Space Mountain theme.
I think it blew her mind.
Pressed coin machines greeted us on our path through the futuresque dump shop, and I made a mental note to stop back by with our coin book and some change. Casting a final glance at the Space Mountain O' Crap for sale, we turned and headed back outside.
Enveloping us like a disgruntled boa constrictor, a relentless blast of fiery humidity jolted us back to the 21st century. We were instantly reminded that even early morning heat in Florida should not be understated during mid to late summer.
Pondering our next move, I thought Tahila might want to ride Space Mountain again, but soon discovered she was eager to max out our ride count.
I love that child.
With crowds still scarce, (excepting the convenient mob scene in Fantasyland) it was time to continue basking in the joy of EMH.
The next attraction in our Touring Plans itinerary was in Frontierland, so a stroll to the west was in order. We were perfectly content with our attraction selection, and were intent on getting there quickly, when all of a sudden, seemingly out of nowhere, an empty queue sucked us right into Buzz Lightyear Space Ranger Spin.
I don’t even know how it happened really.
One moment we were walking along, minding our own business, and the next we were defending the Galaxy against the evil Emperor Zurg.
Resigning myself to see this objective through to fruition, I readied my weapon and placed myself in charge of vehicular rotation. (A duty I partook with reckless abandon.)
What was my ride score?
It doesn’t matter.
It's not about points.
It's about spending time with family.
It's about making memories.
That is what is important here.
Bonding.
Memories.
Magic.
Besides, I hadn't even had coffee yet. Which means technically I wasn't even fully awake.
In fact it could be argued that this entire morning was some wild and crazy dream sequence brought on by an unfortunate late night encounter with French cheese.
From which I somehow attained pictures and stuff.
Frontierland was still our desired destination, so we departed from the joy of a cool interior, and pressed on.
Not long after I took the photo of Tahlia in front of the castle, we encountered a Photopass person and decided to mug for a snapshot with both of us in it.
This was one of the few times our Photopass experience actually worked out like it was supposed to. (Upon returning home, I would discover several missing shots on My Disney Experience, as well as some that seemed a to be online one day and gone the next, only to return and disappear again.)
As I mentioned at the onset, I had a few issues with Disney this time. Several were covered in the PTR. Pretty much all revolved around My Disney Experience.
But on that happy morning, those woes were far from my mind.
Having acquired photo documentation of our morning outing, (Dis Dad Man Law #1 - “Pictures, or it didn’t happen!”) it was time to head on.
The park wasn’t getting any emptier.
Observing the crowds as we crossed The Hub, I saw an increasingly steady stream of people pouring into the Magic Kingdom. None of them seemed to be breaking right or left, but they were seemingly ALL heading into the castle.
Theorizing with relative certainty that even a fairy godmother would have trouble cracking that many eggs, I formed a hypothesis that they were not all heading to Cinderella's Royal Table. I could only assume they were entertaining some misguided notion of walking onto Seven Dwarfs.
I really and truly wanted to warm them about their impending disappointment, and steer them in a more fruitful direction.
I also wanted to continue riding attractions with a minimal wait time.
Plus they were strangers and I needed to model proper stranger communication protocols for my offspring.
For the good of my children, I kept my silence.
Snaking through the masses, we passed these guys as we were crossing over the bridge.
I was happy to see the crowds were light on this side of the park as well.
Chip and Dale were just heading out for a morning mug & hug, and Tahlia wanted a pic. Since this was really her morning, we stopped for a bit and said hello.
Photopass pictures WERE taken. The scanning device chirped approval of my Magic Band. I heard old boy's camera click. I’m pretty sure I even saw them online.
Once.
But alas, we’ll have to settle for the one I took.
With her eyes squinted.
Which I didn't retake because we had Photopass Photos....only we didn't.
My disgruntlement grows.
Chipmunk interaction being declared a success, it was time to cool things down with a ride on our second mountain.
I speak of Splash.
This would be my first time on this attraction. It was being built when I was there in high school.
Unrelenting thunderstorms and days of walking in wet clothes made it undesirable on our honeymoon.
Our girls just weren't quite feeling it in 2009.
But now, it was time.
I was pretty excited about this one. I've heard the Splash Mountain soundtrack on the "Four Parks, One World" CD far more times than I care to admit. I have seen the photos posted on numerous reports.
Yet, as we all know, seeing and experiencing are far different things.
A final stroll around the bend brought us to our destination.
There weren’t that many folks entering the queue, and we really didn’t see much of a line. The only time we fully stopped walking between the time we entered the switchbacks and the time we boarded the attraction was when I stopped to take a photo.
(By the way for an intriguing article on Disney queue switchback design, I recommend
visiting THIS post.) But not yet...come back to it momentarily.
Minimal crowds slowed us slightly as we approached the loading area, but even then we still shuffled along without really stopping. The total time elapsed from the moment I took the photo out front until the moment my tushy slapped a log was 12 minutes.
Hmmm...that last sentence could be misinterpreted.
And yet I cannot bring myself to change it.
We wound up riding with just two other folks, and were soon drifting our way through the antebellum south. I wanted to simply enjoy the attraction without fussing over equipment, so I kept my photo gear in the bag and sat back to take it all in.
I have to say I'm glad I did. It was nice getting to enjoy the ride without worrying about camera settings and framing shots.
I knew enough from reading multiple trip reports to expect more than one drop, but the benefit of not having every scene memorized kept it unfamiliar enough for me to still enjoy the novelty of the first ride.
As we started our approach to what was obviously the "big drop", Tahlia grabbed my leg and said "Here it comes!" After being properly warned by the creatures of the mountain, we reached the summit, put our hands in the air, waved them like we just don't care, and plunged into the briar patch.
Halfway down, something amazing happened.
The guy in the front of the boat had his hat blow off, and Tahlia managed to catch it with her outstretched arm. I have to say I was impressed. She didn't acquire that skill from me...this old man doesn't have that quick a reflexes. I guess all those hours of being hurled in the air and having to twist and land back in the correct position have honed her reaction skills.
The gentleman was grateful for the intervention, and it gave Tahlia and me something to laugh about for the rest of the morning.
After floating through the final scene and returning to the loading platform, I observed that we were both decidedly lacking in overall water coverage. Apparently our log was too light or we were too far back to get a good drenching. We didn't have time to stop for a refreshing air conditioned break though, our next attraction was waiting.
With a determined pace and renewed sense of purpose, we made the incredibly long walk from Splash Mountain to Big Thunder Mountain.
We again moved through the entire queue without stopping, and walked straight into an empty spot at the loading gates. By the time we got there a group was unloading, and within a few moments, we were seated and moving.
Have I mentioned before that I was loving me some morning EMH?
We rode Big Thunder back in 2009, but it was at night. This was going to be Tahlia's first daytime trip on it ever, and my first daytime trip in 20+ years.
Hands were again held high and general squeals of delight was emitted by the junior Biscuit.
I still like this ride. It lacks the some of the childhood memories and cool factor that Space Mountain invokes, but I enjoy it. There is a sense of nostalgia there that just makes me smile.
Plus I’m partial to prospectors.
Conquering the Magic Kingdom Mountain Range, we exited triumphant and happy, and decided to call it a morning. I called back to the room to ensure First Lady Biscuit and Hailee were up and moving, and we meandered off towards Adventureland.
We still had some time to kill, and had not yet heard from Nick and Tammy. Passing by Pirates, we decided to bestow upon it the honor of being our final attraction of the morning.
Empty queue caves escorted us to the loading dock where the cast members seemed relieved that people were showing up to ride. We wound up on a boat with just us and a family of three.
Pirates is a bit hokey and outdated, but I still like it. Again, there is nostalgia there.
Repetitive muscle spasms of a peculiar nature greeted me as we exited the boat, and after a moment, I realized it was my phone. My big boy shorts has those extra front pockets that I had stashed my phone into over at Splash Mountain. I wasn’t used to my knee cap rattling when a call came in.
Nick was on the line letting me know they were leaving the castle. We added a little pep to our step and wound up about 10 feet behind them as we rounded the corner by Casey’s.
We admired Nikki & Sammie’s princess dresses, swapped tales of glory and triumph and fought the hoard of park goers swimming up Main Street. Back on the dock we had a short wait before a boat arrived to transport us back to the lodge.
My nieces were going to change out of their foo-foo britches and into some shorts while I gathered up the remainder of my clan. Our plan was to return to the Magic Kingdom for lunch, FastPass+ redemption, and another dose of goodness.
In all, Tahlia and I had spent just over two and a half hours in the Magic Kingdom. During that time we managed to ride seven attractions and partook of a character meet.
All in all, I’d call that a mighty nifty morning.
Coming Up on Biscuit’s Grand Adventure 2 - “What just happened?”
Click Here to Read The Next Episode
