Bad bus behavior - today - on 2 rides

[Susiequsie60]

I've had major back issues since I was in my mid 20's, compared to some we're talking, that is still small potatoes. Ultimately only the person, their family and their higher power will know for sure. It seems some are afraid to think of this as a rule because there are rare exceptions. It's seems like those who don't want to see grades in school, keep score in the ballgame or allow kids to play tag. Personally I'll get up and likely refuse to sit back down even if someone declines. I'll also allow others actions to reflect on their character either positively or negatively. If it were that much of an issue otherwise, I'd just drive.

I like you Dean. You sound an awful lot like my husband.

 

[Donna3271]

I can handle most of these with amusement but the one that gets me everytime is when YOUNG ABLE BODIED PEOPLE (Men and Woman) refuse to stand to give their seat to elderly or people in need (Parents of very young children). I don't think my family sat much on any bus on our last trip and if we did it was me making my 10 year old sit on my lap much to his dismay.

Since becoming a mother I have learned to tune screaming/crying kids out

OMG!!! THIS<<<<<<< My husband got up to offer his seat to an older woman, and a young girl (I guess about 16) quickly sat down!!! I said "The seat was not for you". She IGNORED ME (started texting on her phone)!!! The older woman was so sweet. She profusely thanked my husband for his efforts. I have 2 herniated discs, and my daughter was in my lap so I could not get up. Plus, there were PLENTY of other young people seated. I was GOBSMACKED!!

BTW.... My 75 year old father gets up to offer his seat!!!! He has an artificial knee to boot!!!

 

[Susiequsie60]

OMG!!! THIS<<<<<<< My husband got up to offer his seat to an older woman, and a young girl (I guess about 16) quickly sat down!!! I said "The seat was not for you". She IGNORED ME!!! The older woman was so sweet. She profusely thanked my husband for his efforts. I have 2 herniated discs, and my daughter was in my lap so I could not get up. I was GOBSMACKED!!

Wow. That's pretty crazy.

 

[MsMagical]

I once ended up on a bus when I was pregnant and carrying my sleeping 2 year old. We ended up in the dreaded position of being the first people after the last seat was taken. And, as many have experienced, we weren't able to get off because we were being pushed to the back by the forward motion of the crowd getting on. No one offered me a seat and that was really hard and frustrating but not because I was tired. It was hard and frustrating because I was worried about my safety and my toddler's safety. Of course, I wouldn't have gotten on if I had known we would be without a seat but that isn't what happened. And I don't harbor any negative feelings about it. I just resolved that day that I would never sit while a pregnant woman or a parent holding a small child stands.

Something else I also think must be really hard is to have a chronic pain or a debilitating disease and to still look "normal". It must be very difficult to feel judged and to feel defensive about it. Ultimately, you don't ever owe anyone an explanation. I think people who believe it's the right thing to do to give up your seat (as I do) are reflecting their own values based on their abilities in their individual situations. I prefer to assume the good in people rather than the bad so if I see someone who looks healthy but doesn't get up, I choose to assume they have a good reason for doing so. I don't live in a fairytale world, I just prefer to see the good first. It keeps me sane. I often wonder why the first reaction to these things is failure to have empathy? Who knows what anyone's story is?

To quickly return to the original post: Babies and toddlers are little people. And they make noise. Sometimes loud, annoying, hair raising noise and that is hard. But they are not things parents control, they are humans with little bitty minds of their own. Little people who are just learning how to live in this big bad world. And their parents are probably doing the best they can. Most likely, no one on a bus is more miserable with a screaming baby than his or her parents. And that smiling or benign look you see on their faces is them trying not to make it worse, trying to calm their baby, and like that mother profusely claiming her baby is "loved", just looking for some kind of empathy since she is mortified by the screams of her most likely very loved little child.

 

[aaarcher86]

In our experience Downtown Disney buses always seem to be few and far between so it's likely you would have waited a long wait for the next one. Waiting for the next bus is something we only do at park closing time because the resort buses arrive very frequently at that time. It's a particular concern when we've spent too much time on our feet and DH's back is hurting and my feet are in so much pain I am hobbling along on the way to the bus stop. But since we're responsible for putting ourselves in that situation, we also take responsibility to do what's necessary to be sure we get a seat by opting to wait for another bus. I don't expect someone else who is probably just as tired as I am to offer me their seat, just as I wouldn't expect someone to let me cut in line for a ride in the park just because I'm older than they are and less comfortable standing for long periods of time. At park closing everybody is extremely tired so I think it's best to look out for yourself and your family and do what you need to do to ensure your own safety and comfort, even if that means spending a few bucks to take a taxi rather than the bus.

I agree with you.

I'll give up my seat without hesitation, but it irks the hell out of me when people expect it.

There was a poster who gave a long winded post that said she had MS - what is someone like that doing to help themselves not stand on the bus, other than walking on and mean mugging all the seemingly able bodied people expecting a seat? It doesn't just go one way or another - people need to be responsible for themselves, too.

 

[Dean]

I like you Dean. You sound an awful lot like my husband.

Is that a good or bad thing, LOL. I just do what I can, try to be the best I can be every day and learn to be better where applicable sometimes from my own mistakes. I had that happen yesterday on the drive home from Port Everglades when I ran up on a bottleneck. A car on my left, a truck just in front of me and to the right needing to merge and not planning well and a car in the right lane going 15-20 MPH less than the speed limit (I was my usual 72 in a 70). I felt bad how it worked out and would hope to do it differently next time. Likely the one area I have to struggle with is not to cross over into other people's space when trying to help even when my intent is honorable.

 

[Judique]

I agree with you.

I'll give up my seat without hesitation, but it irks the hell out of me when people expect it.

There was a poster who gave a long winded post that said she had MS - what is someone like that doing to help themselves not stand on the bus, other than walking on and mean mugging all the seemingly able bodied people expecting a seat? It doesn't just go one way or another - people need to be responsible for themselves, too.

I agree!

That said, I'm old and I have the look people give up seats for. Thank you all!

Most of the time I don't really need a seat so I don't take it, but sometimes my back gives out and I do need that seat. I usually just wait till the park empties if I find myself hurting and I find a bench for awhile. Park hopping helps also - just spend a few hours, go back and rest and come back out later.

Nowadays, I just drive to all parks, and I stay at BLT and walk over for my MK day.

Whatever you do, don't let it ruin your vacation, just get over it and move on - life is too short!

 

[dnkmmw]

I'm really sorry, but to me, this sounds awfully defensive. And by the way, even if I were judging you, what the heck do you care? I'm a total stranger. Why do you care what I think about you? It seems like you actually care a lot. I'm just trying to explain that I'm really not judging people for not standing. I'm just a little curious how there could be 15 - 20 healthy looking young people, all with issues keeping them from standing. Or if those people are actually healthy with no concerns (other than tiredness) keeping them from standing, I'm glad they're not my husband or my kids. If you feel personally judged by that, it's your issue.

My goodness. I'm starting to feel judged for being part of a family that thinks it's the right thing to do to give up a seat on a crowded bus AND to have an opinion about it!

I never said that I don't care what people think about me. In this situation, I actually do care. Why? Because it's been mentioned over and over that people who are healthy looking should be giving up their seats and those that don't weren't raised right.

It now been mentioned that I am not given individual consideration, rather just lumped in a group and it shouldn't bother me. That to me is incredibly unfair and yes, I guess I am defensive about it. It happens to me on many a bus ride because, again, I make sure if I need a seat I will have one. Yet I get lumped in the group as not being raised right. I'm sorry people think it's fair to lump people together based on their looks and make judgements about them, and even how they were raised, based on physical appearance.

 

[Jennasis]

I suppose someone who really needed a seat could ask those sitting if they'd help them out? I have also been on buses where the driver announced asking for someone(s) willing to give up a seat for someone.

 

[Meldev]

Rode the bus twice today - OKW > MK and back.

Random acts of bad bus behavior:



3. Bellowing (really, like bus shaking) passenger refusing to collapse over stuffed double stroller; sat in front of overly packed bus despite being first to board, "I don't know how they expect me to do this"; he had two little ones AND 4 OTHER ADULTS. Try being a single mom with two kids, dude.


What a trip! Bus drivers must be saints or deaf to put up with all the crazy.

That would irk me to no end!! We are a family of six - four kids who took a double stroller last Fall. Yep it was loaded with stuff, but as bus gets close we unload everything necessary. We carry every bag - DH folds the stroller and holds what he can, I usually have the littlest in my arms and bags on shoulders and our girls (6, 8, 10 last trip) held their items as well as any extra bags. It's a team effort - oh how nice it'd be just to leave it all in the stroller...you've got to be kidding me!

 

[2DisPrincesses]

We give up our seats if it is obvious someone needs one. In fact in October my husband also folded and carried a double jogging stroller for a mom with three kids trying desperately to make it to their princess breakfast. Turns out her husband and mother were back in the room sick. If a person looks healthy, we don't try to give them a seat. Not saying there couldn't be a reason they need one but how would we know??? IMO if a person has a need to be seated and never standing in a bus, then it is their responsibility to rent a car, take a cab, wait for an emptier bus, ect.

 

[Susiequsie60]

I never said that I don't care what people think about me. In this situation, I actually do care. Why? Because it's been mentioned over and over that people who are healthy looking should be giving up their seats and those that don't weren't raised right.

It now been mentioned that I am not given individual consideration, rather just lumped in a group and it shouldn't bother me. That to me is incredibly unfair and yes, I guess I am defensive about it. It happens to me on many a bus ride because, again, I make sure if I need a seat I will have one. Yet I get lumped in the group as not being raised right. I'm sorry people think it's fair to lump people together based on their looks and make judgements about them, and even how they were raised, based on physical appearance.

Well, I really am sorry if I offended you. I am. Considering we're on a nameless, faceless public forum and I really truly did not intend to speak directly to, I'm sorry. I can't, however, really change the way I feel. Just like you can't change the way you feel.

You'll just have to go on the assumption that if we're ever on a WDW bus together and you're sitting while others are standing, I'm not judging you. Either as an individual or lumped in a group. That's the best I can do. I'll be sure to keep my feelings to myself (as I always do anyway in situations like this.)

Peace.

 

[Luv2trav]

On the flip side I have been on a bus when many people stand up to save seats before they load more people on the bus (Assuming someone else will need the seats more) and when everyone gets on the bus they continue to stand when there are seats available.. It's like the extreme and they don't feel like they can sit down

Even at park closing time I really don't mind standing. Heck I am blessed and happy that my family is in good health that even when we are tired and exhausted that standing for one last moment is a good thing. My mother would give up everything to stand up very tired on a bus ride home from the park.

 

[kittyab]

I am glad on my next visit my resort has the monorail. I really didn't like the bus. Often we had to wait for a second or third bus to come.

As for giving up a seat. My husband often gave up his seat and I had my DD on my lap.

I totally get at the end of the day everyone is tired and their feet and back hurt. We waited till we could get a bus with more seating often on that last trip.

Scooters.... please don't get me started. A angry woman who was frustrated that she couldn't get through... ram her way through, she ran over my foot and ran into a baby stroller.

 

[Bellecruiser]

Hi There,

 

[twinmomplus2]

No offense but I take these posts with a grain of salt. That said I'm willing to bet someone posted about me in December. I have a 14 year old son who has hip dysphasia and braces in his shoes to align his gait. 50 percent of the time he has back or foot pain. There is no way you could know this by looking at him.
That said the day we left for our trip he attended a full day at school. Where they did a boot camp gym class. He did not ask to be excused, I was not aware this class was taking place. This kid was so miserable and in so much discomfort the entire trip. At the most we spent 4 hours in a park. He was just too uncomfortable.
We Were at Downtown Disney and had to leave. Walk to the bus from Trex the kid is miserable. Wait get a seat. Woman runs on the bus last minute with a ton of bags and a few kids. Puts one kid on a seat. Next to my son and proceeds to complain about well I guess little kids should stand. Hope you don't fall....
Bags got shoved into us. My son started to stand and I said very firmly don't you dare.
Bus starts moving and there's an older gentleman there. And I tapped him and said would you like to sit? He declined the offer and we went on our way to AKL.
People are not entitled to anything kindness is given when people are infact kind to start off.
Ok Rant over... That said when we left the MVMCP the next night after just 3 hours. Because he was unable to walk. No paid for a cab. It is my responsibility to see that my families needs are taken care of.

 

[Funfire240]

We've been pretty lucky I guess so far - but we figure if the kids have to stand they have to stand. (6 and 4 now). We were able to get seats in the back on our last night last year with both kids sleeping on our laps - and a nice gentleman next to me who ended up holding our stroller and bags for us to keep them out of the way. We were comfortable but there was a man and son who very loudly kept yelling and complaining about not letting kids sit and very loudly explaining to his son how rude people are.
We have only had once instance that was miserable - one night DD sat in the stroller and fell asleep while waiting for the bus and I was holding DS who fell asleep in my arms. That night, there was no where to sit so we rode back standing, both holding a sleeping kid and trying to balance a stroller (DH stood with DD6 in his arms and with the stroller and I had D4 and the backpack). There also was another gentleman holding his sleeping daughter as well, standing with us. Nobody offered a seat and we just managed. Although it was a rough ride home we dealt with it - it was easy transportation without having to deal with the monorail/ferry then to the car, etc. with 2 sleeping kids.

 

[smidgy]

No offense but I take these posts with a grain of salt. That said I'm willing to bet someone posted about me in December. I have a 14 year old son who has hip dysphasia and braces in his shoes to align his gait. 50 percent of the time he has back or foot pain. There is no way you could know this by looking at him.
That said the day we left for our trip he attended a full day at school. Where they did a boot camp gym class. He did not ask to be excused, I was not aware this class was taking place. This kid was so miserable and in so much discomfort the entire trip. At the most we spent 4 hours in a park. He was just too uncomfortable.
We Were at Downtown Disney and had to leave. Walk to the bus from Trex the kid is miserable. Wait get a seat. Woman runs on the bus last minute with a ton of bags and a few kids. Puts one kid on a seat. Next to my son and proceeds to complain about well I guess little kids should stand. Hope you don't fall....
Bags got shoved into us. My son started to stand and I said very firmly don't you dare.
Bus starts moving and there's an older gentleman there. And I tapped him and said would you like to sit? He declined the offer and we went on our way to AKL.
People are not entitled to anything kindness is given when people are infact kind to start off.
Ok Rant over... That said when we left the MVMCP the next night after just 3 hours. Because he was unable to walk. No paid for a cab. It is my responsibility to see that my families needs are taken care of.

how awful for your son. so sad he was in pain.. and then made to feel guilty because he is finally sitting. (and he is a kind soul for being willing to get up..) but he should not have to and anyone who would spout off things like that, trying to guilt him inot it is just ignorant or rude, or both.

again you never know anyone elses circumstances.. therefore , you should never say anything aloud to try to guilt, coerce, etc. anyone into giving up their seat for you or anyone in your family.
this poor kid was in pain!

 

[Ariel8676]

For us , 2 adults and 4 children..i will always make sure my children have a seat (13,12,9,4) there are times when the bus stops short or makes a tight turn. I WILL not have my kids getting injured because someone thinks they deserve a seat more then them. Normally though the 4 of them will squish in two spots instead of four.
Now for my husband and I we will only sit if the bus only has a few people on it, and always give up our seats for young children, elderly etc.
We have seen some pretty pathetic behavior from adults though and it pisses me off. One time, crowded bus, very pregnant woman by herself 2 young kids..not one person asked if she wanted to sit. My daughter got up for her and my other daughter ended up holding one of her little ones. lol Now maybe she should have waited for the next bus, but maybe she couldn't ..we didn't know her story and i wasn't going to judge.

 

[SarahInMN]

No offense but I take these posts with a grain of salt. That said I'm willing to bet someone posted about me in December. I have a 14 year old son who has hip dysphasia and braces in his shoes to align his gait. 50 percent of the time he has back or foot pain. There is no way you could know this by looking at him...We Were at Downtown Disney and had to leave. Walk to the bus from Trex the kid is miserable. Wait get a seat. Woman runs on the bus last minute with a ton of bags and a few kids. Puts one kid on a seat. Next to my son and proceeds to complain about well I guess little kids should stand. Hope you don't fall....Bags got shoved into us. My son started to stand and I said very firmly don't you dare.

Your son sounds like a very nice young guy for starting to get up! This is the sort of thing that drives me crazy about posts of "people didn't get up and offer seats." The reality is that none of us what other people are going through and, although judging is part of human nature, we really should try to give people the benefit of the doubt.

When I was recovering from a really bad ankle injury a few years back, walking was no big but I didn't have the proprioception (sense of my ankle in space) or the ligament/muscle strength to brace myself on a Disney bus while standing. Standing would have risked my flying down the bus aisle but sitting would left me open to all sorts of judgement by other passengers (yes I know I shouldn't care what other people think of me but lets be honest: we do really care).