GoofyBaseballMom26
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Aug 4, 2005
- Messages
- 1,180
Bravo!!! 
You are now my new hero.
You are now my new hero.
An Inconvenient Truth: happyhaunt Style! (New... pg. 113!)
- Thread starter 1000thhappyhaunt
- Start date
schmoopypoo
Countin down the days
- Joined
- May 22, 2006
- Messages
- 483
LMAO...the way you handle the "rudies" was great...i can not stop laughing here at work...luvin the report so far 
1000thhappyhaunt
Maelstromer
- Joined
- Nov 23, 2005
- Messages
- 1,797
So the horde of happyhaunts paused for a group photo in front of the Tree of Life. We got the CM photographer to take a couple. We're not really going to buy these, of course, we're just pretending so that she will ALSO take pictures with OUR camera. She does. Thanks! I take the PhotoPass card from her and store it away where it will never see the light of day again. Down deep in the DVC knapsack beside the postcard I forgot to mail to The General LAST December when we were here at WDW. I mailed it this time, though. When I found it. MERRY CHRISTMAS, Mom! And... Happy Mother's Day! Too. (I just added that to the bottom. Two occassions for one. I know. I know. Cheapy cheap cheap.) Tommy makes me laugh. Whenever we do a group shot he raises his hands and cups them. He has no idea why. Other than the photographers at Disney ask the kids to do this all the time. I suppose it's to insert a character into the finished product. But, since we've never actually viewed our PhotoPass Photos... that's just a guess. Anyhow... he does it all the time. Now. Whenever all five of us gather together for a picture. Cracks Me(l) up! It does. There's one of us from a couple months ago at a synchro tournament with all our cousins. Together. And Tommy is standing in front with his little hands cupped. It's funny. I think.
Moving on. Now. We head directly for EE. With every other guest that entered the park when we did. It's a streaming mass of humanity. I thought about suggesting we run but I figured there was no point. By now. Turning the corner and walking towards it we got a great view. Of it. EE. I asked Mellyman what he thought of the mountain. He was impressed. He thought it looked very real. The shape of Everest, the vegetation and landscape and all that. And... he should know. He's climbed to the base camp on Mount Annapurna. Trekking in Nepal. Not Everest, though. But... he's seen pictures. Of Mount Everest. So he's pretty much an Everest Expert. I think. Anyway... I'll let him be the expert for our group. 'Cause he HAS spent time in Nepalese villages. Pulling the worst extended ZZUB of his life... for two days... after he ate goat meat purchased at the outdoor market. After that he went vegetarian for the rest of his tour of third world countries. I mean... GROSS ME OUT! I'll spare you all the details. Of that. And, if I were you, I'd pass on the smoked goat leg from the vendor cart at AK too. Or is it turkey? No matter. Anyhow... the five of us stood in the midst of the huge crowd outside EE and debated our options. We quickly realized that we couldn't get Fastpasses for the day. They were for 4:30pm. We wouldn't be in the AK at that time. We would be either in Walmart or the pool at BWV. But not the AK. So Mellyman decided that we would join the line which was VERY long at this point and we would just wait the approximately 1 hour to ride. We were going to have to do the baby swap thing and then that would mess up Beth's plan too. Because there was NO WAY that Mellyman was riding twice in a row. While I skipped it altogether. She'd have to ride with Me(l). Poor girl. So while Melly went off to get in line for us... I started with the sunscreen ordeal. Over to the side. Across from the EE dump shop and out of people's way. It truly is an ordeal. Yet, less of one than second degree burns on your children's extremeties. I mean... THE GENERAL never put sunsreen on me. And I am a fair-haired, fair-skinned Irish girl who tends to freckle. I burnt to a crisp. Every summer. At least twice. But... it toughened me up. I learned how to take some serious pain. And not to whimper about it. And I actually enjoyed peeling layers of skin off of my shoulders after the wet bubbles underneath popped. I think. Anyway... now I have a dermatologist. We're very close. He's on my speed dial and Christmas card list. So I started putting that over-rated sunscreen on Tommy. First. 'Cause he's the palest. And, by now, after our trudge through half of the AK... he's probably already burnt. The other challenge with Tommy is finding a sunscreen that won't cause a rash on him. It's difficult because the one I used last summer NOW causes a rash. So I pick one of the three brands I bought for this trip and cover him. Hoping for the best. I remember his ears. This time. And the tops of his feet. This time. Sorry, Tommy. Beth does her own except for her own face and back and shoulders. I help her out. Then I look over at Calvin. And note his white legs. Not his SKIN. But the amount of sunscreen he has applied to his legs appears as thick as Elmer's glue. All over his calves. About a cup of sunscreen. Geez. I scrape it off and use it for the rest of him. And there is STILL enough left over to do my face and shoulders, too. There. We're finished. I tell Beth to join her father in line and that I'll have to head over to the washroom with the boys to wash my hands and Calvin's then we'll join them. Ok. She goes off and we head to the restroom. I force Calvin into the ladies with Tommy and I, we wash up and then head back to find Beth and Mellyman. But... we can't. See them.
We head back to the dump shop area and I stand around where I'm SURE they'll be able to spot me and look for them. Tommy is in the stroller, still. Calvin is looking around too. Calvin is right beside me. Then Calvin is not. Beside me. Anymore. Calvin is gone. I quit looking for Beth and Melly and start looking for Calvin. I hate losing a child. Really. It's bad form. As a parent. So I release Tommy from the stoller and we go looking around for Calvin. Calling his name. Scanning the crowds. Finally, I'm about to freak out. Ask a CM to put out an all-points bulletin or something. When I decide to check out the dump shop. Of EE. The shop that the ride empties out into is full of neat stuff. Stuffed Yeti backpacks, t-shirts, hats, EE gear and one Calvin happyhaunt. In an orange tank. Yep. Found him.
Me: CALVIN!!! What do you think you're doing?
Calvin: Shopping.
Me: You wandered off. I lost you. You lost us. You CAN NOT do that.
Calvin: I figured you'd find me.
Me: Well, mad props to me. (really. I said it. I say it a lot.) For that. But don't do it again or we'll have some BIG problems. Alrighty? AND I MEAN BIG, MISTER!
Calvin: Alright. Sorry. I just wanted to buy something.
Me: But, Calvin, how did you expect to PAY for "something". "Somethings" aren't free. Especially at Disney.
Calvin: I don't know.
Me: Since you don't have any money on you... were you going to barter? Or something?
Calvin: What's barter?
Me: Trade things for other things.
Calvin: OH. Yeah. I was gonna do that.
Me: Great. 'Cause you have one sweaty shirt, one pair of shorts, a pair of boxers and two sandals that smell vaguely of dirty feet. That's gonna get you a buttload of stuff, my friend. So... let's go find your father and Beth.
Tommy: I want a toy.
Me: Ask Calvin to trade some nail clippings for it. Let's go.
Ok. So that was the part where Calvin got in BIG TROUBLE. I'm not much of a disciplinarian though. I want my kids to like me. I want to be their friend.
Haahahhahhahhahaaaaahhhhhaaaaaa. HA! Yeah. Right.
So we exit said dump shop and find Mellyman and Beth standing around outside looking for us. GEEZ! They thought we got lost and left the line to find us. Clearly we are not going to be riding EE now. Today. At all. CRAP!!!! Nothing we can do about it though. So we head off to do a ride which we all like and will end up thoroughly drenching us... so AFTER we can head off to check in to the BWV looking like a bunch of bedraggled drowned rats. Who cares? Though. 'Cause we LOVE the Kali River Rapids.
No bread for us. No soup for us. And... no Yeti for us. Either.
To be continued. Up next: We get really really really wet. And then experience the maze which calls itself "The eating area of Flame Tree BBQ".
Moving on. Now. We head directly for EE. With every other guest that entered the park when we did. It's a streaming mass of humanity. I thought about suggesting we run but I figured there was no point. By now. Turning the corner and walking towards it we got a great view. Of it. EE. I asked Mellyman what he thought of the mountain. He was impressed. He thought it looked very real. The shape of Everest, the vegetation and landscape and all that. And... he should know. He's climbed to the base camp on Mount Annapurna. Trekking in Nepal. Not Everest, though. But... he's seen pictures. Of Mount Everest. So he's pretty much an Everest Expert. I think. Anyway... I'll let him be the expert for our group. 'Cause he HAS spent time in Nepalese villages. Pulling the worst extended ZZUB of his life... for two days... after he ate goat meat purchased at the outdoor market. After that he went vegetarian for the rest of his tour of third world countries. I mean... GROSS ME OUT! I'll spare you all the details. Of that. And, if I were you, I'd pass on the smoked goat leg from the vendor cart at AK too. Or is it turkey? No matter. Anyhow... the five of us stood in the midst of the huge crowd outside EE and debated our options. We quickly realized that we couldn't get Fastpasses for the day. They were for 4:30pm. We wouldn't be in the AK at that time. We would be either in Walmart or the pool at BWV. But not the AK. So Mellyman decided that we would join the line which was VERY long at this point and we would just wait the approximately 1 hour to ride. We were going to have to do the baby swap thing and then that would mess up Beth's plan too. Because there was NO WAY that Mellyman was riding twice in a row. While I skipped it altogether. She'd have to ride with Me(l). Poor girl. So while Melly went off to get in line for us... I started with the sunscreen ordeal. Over to the side. Across from the EE dump shop and out of people's way. It truly is an ordeal. Yet, less of one than second degree burns on your children's extremeties. I mean... THE GENERAL never put sunsreen on me. And I am a fair-haired, fair-skinned Irish girl who tends to freckle. I burnt to a crisp. Every summer. At least twice. But... it toughened me up. I learned how to take some serious pain. And not to whimper about it. And I actually enjoyed peeling layers of skin off of my shoulders after the wet bubbles underneath popped. I think. Anyway... now I have a dermatologist. We're very close. He's on my speed dial and Christmas card list. So I started putting that over-rated sunscreen on Tommy. First. 'Cause he's the palest. And, by now, after our trudge through half of the AK... he's probably already burnt. The other challenge with Tommy is finding a sunscreen that won't cause a rash on him. It's difficult because the one I used last summer NOW causes a rash. So I pick one of the three brands I bought for this trip and cover him. Hoping for the best. I remember his ears. This time. And the tops of his feet. This time. Sorry, Tommy. Beth does her own except for her own face and back and shoulders. I help her out. Then I look over at Calvin. And note his white legs. Not his SKIN. But the amount of sunscreen he has applied to his legs appears as thick as Elmer's glue. All over his calves. About a cup of sunscreen. Geez. I scrape it off and use it for the rest of him. And there is STILL enough left over to do my face and shoulders, too. There. We're finished. I tell Beth to join her father in line and that I'll have to head over to the washroom with the boys to wash my hands and Calvin's then we'll join them. Ok. She goes off and we head to the restroom. I force Calvin into the ladies with Tommy and I, we wash up and then head back to find Beth and Mellyman. But... we can't. See them.
We head back to the dump shop area and I stand around where I'm SURE they'll be able to spot me and look for them. Tommy is in the stroller, still. Calvin is looking around too. Calvin is right beside me. Then Calvin is not. Beside me. Anymore. Calvin is gone. I quit looking for Beth and Melly and start looking for Calvin. I hate losing a child. Really. It's bad form. As a parent. So I release Tommy from the stoller and we go looking around for Calvin. Calling his name. Scanning the crowds. Finally, I'm about to freak out. Ask a CM to put out an all-points bulletin or something. When I decide to check out the dump shop. Of EE. The shop that the ride empties out into is full of neat stuff. Stuffed Yeti backpacks, t-shirts, hats, EE gear and one Calvin happyhaunt. In an orange tank. Yep. Found him.
Me: CALVIN!!! What do you think you're doing?
Calvin: Shopping.
Me: You wandered off. I lost you. You lost us. You CAN NOT do that.
Calvin: I figured you'd find me.
Me: Well, mad props to me. (really. I said it. I say it a lot.) For that. But don't do it again or we'll have some BIG problems. Alrighty? AND I MEAN BIG, MISTER!
Calvin: Alright. Sorry. I just wanted to buy something.
Me: But, Calvin, how did you expect to PAY for "something". "Somethings" aren't free. Especially at Disney.
Calvin: I don't know.
Me: Since you don't have any money on you... were you going to barter? Or something?
Calvin: What's barter?
Me: Trade things for other things.
Calvin: OH. Yeah. I was gonna do that.
Me: Great. 'Cause you have one sweaty shirt, one pair of shorts, a pair of boxers and two sandals that smell vaguely of dirty feet. That's gonna get you a buttload of stuff, my friend. So... let's go find your father and Beth.
Tommy: I want a toy.
Me: Ask Calvin to trade some nail clippings for it. Let's go.
Ok. So that was the part where Calvin got in BIG TROUBLE. I'm not much of a disciplinarian though. I want my kids to like me. I want to be their friend.
Haahahhahhahhahaaaaahhhhhaaaaaa. HA! Yeah. Right.
So we exit said dump shop and find Mellyman and Beth standing around outside looking for us. GEEZ! They thought we got lost and left the line to find us. Clearly we are not going to be riding EE now. Today. At all. CRAP!!!! Nothing we can do about it though. So we head off to do a ride which we all like and will end up thoroughly drenching us... so AFTER we can head off to check in to the BWV looking like a bunch of bedraggled drowned rats. Who cares? Though. 'Cause we LOVE the Kali River Rapids.
No bread for us. No soup for us. And... no Yeti for us. Either.
To be continued. Up next: We get really really really wet. And then experience the maze which calls itself "The eating area of Flame Tree BBQ".
labdogs42
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Dec 2, 2005
- Messages
- 6,867
ZZUB said:
See, this is why I can't write trip reports. I always get the details mixed up! I knew what it meant and I remembered the fanny pack, but darn it if I got two awesome trip report writers mixed up in my head!! Zzub and Lala I hope you can forgive me!!
ETA Now that I read the last installment, I'm cracking up again! I don't need to write my own report because I swear AK was as crazy, hot, and crowded the day I was there. I didn't ride the tram, but now i know what to say to the seat stealers in the future -- classic!!
ZZUB
Roll Tide, Mean It
- Joined
- May 9, 2003
- Messages
- 947
It's a challenge. To read your trip report and not ruin my suit, my keyboard, my desktop and my phone. I eat a salad (did we lose a war or something?) for lunch and when I don't have a client meeting, I read this nonsense. No more. Not after today.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to eat lettuce with ranch dressing while you read about a two day vomit fest resulting from eating rancid meat?!
Just the thought of rancid meat makes lettuce with ranch dressing hard to digest.
Perhaps you can put some sort of disclaimer at the beginning of these chapters that people shouldn't read them while eating, just after eating, just before eating, thinking about eating or even while bleating because that rhymes with eating.
Still. Despite the waves of nausea, I enjoyed this update. Preace.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to eat lettuce with ranch dressing while you read about a two day vomit fest resulting from eating rancid meat?!
Just the thought of rancid meat makes lettuce with ranch dressing hard to digest.
Perhaps you can put some sort of disclaimer at the beginning of these chapters that people shouldn't read them while eating, just after eating, just before eating, thinking about eating or even while bleating because that rhymes with eating.
Still. Despite the waves of nausea, I enjoyed this update. Preace.
/
bbangel
My friends call me the font of useless knowledge
- Joined
- May 18, 2006
- Messages
- 2,233
Wow, you are a great writer. I hope you share your talents with more than just us!
Side note...a great way to get rid of rude people. Cough and then tell them it's okay it's just SARS. Freaks them out every time.
I can't wait to read more about your wonderful adventures.
Side note...a great way to get rid of rude people. Cough and then tell them it's okay it's just SARS. Freaks them out every time.
I can't wait to read more about your wonderful adventures.
Loves Disney
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Jun 15, 2005
- Messages
- 6,935
Your trip reports make me home sick! Yes, "home sick!" Disney is our home, always has been. heh. You are very detailed in what goes on...almost makes me feel like I'm right there with you all! (creepy? nah...lol) Anyway, I find your TR more interesting than some books I've read! I'm so looking forward to reading more about your Disney experience!! 
Ron from Michigan
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Aug 23, 1999
- Messages
- 5,938
You had me laughing so hard with your last post. I had my co-workers wondering why I was laughing so hard . Keep up the posts BUT PLEASE PLEASE GIVE US ANOTHER CHAPTER TODAY. 
jennymouse
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Mar 9, 2001
- Messages
- 4,175
Aww, the happyhaunts got disfunctional and didn't get to ride. I think you were all CHICKEN! There, I said it.
Lisa_Belle
Mouseketeer
- Joined
- Apr 28, 2006
- Messages
- 450
bbangel said:
This is sooooooooooo true. I had some neighbors with a bevy of young kids who were always coming over to play. They were way out of control too. About the time of the big SARS scare, I had a seasonal allergy cough. The dad jokingly asked me if I knew anyone who had been to Asia lately. I truthfylly told him that I did know a person who had been to Hong Kong, one who had been to Tokyo and one who had been to Beijing in the previous three weeks. The kids never did come over to play after that. Seriously. They moved several months later.
Marla Hellwig
I'm not lost, it's called creative exploring
- Joined
- Mar 25, 2000
- Messages
- 16,020
I would think with all of your famly's tummy problems, I am sure there is a specialist at home that could fix you all right up 1000thhappyhaunt
3 cases of Pepto Bismol - $50.00
Leash for Calvin so he doesn't "shop alone" again - $10.00
1000thHappyHaunt WDW trip report - PRICELESS!
Keep up the great writing, anxiously awaiting more! You had me literally in tears today and feeling like I was right there with you!
Chip
Leash for Calvin so he doesn't "shop alone" again - $10.00
1000thHappyHaunt WDW trip report - PRICELESS!
Keep up the great writing, anxiously awaiting more! You had me literally in tears today and feeling like I was right there with you!
Chip
2xcited2slp
<font color=deeppink>One day~~the slipper will fit
- Joined
- Mar 10, 2006
- Messages
- 1,987
Still enjoying. This.
Chapter 11
<font color=FF3300>I suspect that the list of thin
- Joined
- Feb 12, 2006
- Messages
- 984
1000thhappyhaunt said:
I'm glad I'm not the only one who enjoys doing this -- the goal is to get the biggest strip possible. Fun with molting.
Great report.
Dreamer & Wisher
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Mar 28, 2006
- Messages
- 2,877
Mel, I love your trip report! Keep it up. I would so like to read your previous trip reports. What does it mean that they are locked down? 
Glad you weren't too hard on your little wanderer. It sure is scary losing him though!
The turtle part of your report really had me
Looking forward to MORE!!
Glad you weren't too hard on your little wanderer. It sure is scary losing him though!
The turtle part of your report really had me
Looking forward to MORE!!
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