Wwyd?

[hambirg]

But she can't prove her kid didn't do it either. No way my kid is getting the blame laid on him when there is as good of a chance that her child did it also.

It should just be chalked up to learning that when you let others use your stuff sometimes things happen and either deal with it or watch your stuff when it is being used more carefully.

Still wouldn't buy a new game. I wouldn't buy a used one either BUT if you feel you have to do something this is what I would do -wait till I found a used one and give her that.

This!

He was at her house, presumably being supervised by her. No one knows who damaged that disc over a month's time. No one saw your son being grossly negligent. . .like riding over it with his bicycle in their driveway. This is an important lesson for your sister to learn. If this was a smalls claims case, she would be laughed out of court.

Some people would say to just pay it. .. but seriously think about that. Why should you assume responsibility for something nobody knows happened or not, in her home, under her supervision? I think that's nuts. It's like saying. . .I let you drive my car last month and now it's making a weird noise. . .so it must have been something you did. Huh?

ETA- I wouldn't offer to have the scratches removed either. I would tell her about how SHE can take them in for that though. It's time Dsis learned to be responsible.

This would be totally different if she let him borrow the game, he took it home, it was not damaged, he played with it and returned it damaged. In that case I would have the scratches removed or replace it. BUT this is not the case at all!

 

[mjkacmom]

And I can't imagine not paying for something my child ruined.

And I can't imagine asking the parents of a child I am supposed to be supervising to pay for a toy their child broke. If it's being used, there is always a chance it might be broken. If there is something I would be upset about being broken, it's not played with. And who knows if the OP's ds broke it or not. Now, if someone was sure my child broke something, and let me know, of course I'd offer to pay for it. But I'd never ask another parent to pay for something.

 

[hambirg]

double post

 

[hambirg]

And I can't imagine asking the parents of a child I am supposed to be supervising to pay for a toy their child broke. If it's being used, there is always a chance it might be broken. If there is something I would be upset about being broken, it's not played with. And who knows if the OP's ds broke it or not. Now, if someone was sure my child broke something, and let me know, of course I'd offer to pay for it. But I'd never ask another parent to pay for something.

You mean if I let your 7yr old drive my car, you wouldn't pay for it when he wrecks it? Darn!!!

 

[Kat77]

You guys who would pay up to keep the peace are so sweet! I'd tell my sibling to get real I think it is a bit wacky to call up accusing her nephew after an entire month has passed. Does she pull this stuff on her friends too?
Nope, I would not replace the game. I would suggest she try to have it resurfaced and be done.

 

[KAA1972]

This is somewhat budget related....

My sister emailed me and asked me to talk with my DS (7) because they went to play their Wii and found one of their games not working and a few scratches on some others. They hadn't played the Wii for some time, but said my DS had played it several times at their house. They had given him permission to play the games,and he played it on his own intheir basement.

Now, that very same evening that I get this email, my DH and I both have to talk with same DS about being responsible for his Wii games and DVDs/CDs. We were finding them all over our basement - not in cases - and noticed some scratches as well. We told him he needs to always put them back in their cases and handle them gently.

After getting the email from my sister, we spoke with him AGAIN, and added that from now on, he really needs to have an adult help him with any DVDs or CDs since he doesn't know how to handle them properly.

I email my sister and tell her we spoke with him and have told him he is not allowed to play anything without an adult, and suggest that she not allow him to play the Wii at her house without supervision too.

She writes back "thanks... hope he's not too mad at me.... It's just that one game doesn't work at all now and others are scratched... And we sort of yelled at A [their 3-year-old] thinking that he had done it.... Hope R [my son] isn't mad at us..."

So, twice now she tells me her game is broken, and I think she's hinting that we should replace the game. Thing is, we haven't been to her house for over a month, and I really don't know if my son scratched the game. I am sure he COULD have, but we weren't there long and it was some time ago. She does have a 3-year-old and an infant in her house, so really anything could happen.

Am I obligated to offer to buy a new game for her? Should I be making my DS pay for this?

If I knew he broke the game on purpose (or even if I knew he did it accidentally) I would think we should replace it. But we don't know what happened to it. I have no idea if they played the game since we were there last, or if they had anyone else who played it, or if their son touches the games.

WWYD?

I would not replace it -- because you don't know if your son even used it -- much less broke it. I also wouldn't bring it up again with your sister. If she brings it up again, simply state -- we have spoken with DS and he knows that he is not to touch the games at your house unless you are there to supervise. If she inquires about the game or replacing it -- say that you believe what your son told you and that since neither of you are sure who scratched/broke the game then you have no option but to believe your son -- and that it shouldn't be an issue going forward since there will be no unsupervised play with the Wii at her house. Of course, say all of this really nicely and not as direct as I said it and hopefully everything will be fine.

On a side note, I would never ask or hint to anyone -- even friends or family to replace an item that their kids broke in my house. In fact, I wouldn't even tell them about it (my best friend's child recently broke my iPod -- I saw him do it and didn't even mention it to her as it was an accident) -- unless it was malicious on behalf of the child. If I have the item where the kids can play with it then it's likely to be broken or played with and it is my responsibility as an adult to put away things that I don't want played with or broken.

Best of luck -- but no you shouldn't pay for it or have DS pay for it.

 

[cm8]

Are you obligated to pay for it (IMO)? NO.
The child was not supervised and it isn't clear that the 7 year old even damaged the disc.

Would I end up paying for it? Probably.

Mostly because I am a people pleaser and I like to keep the peace.


Having said that, we had a favorite wii game that stopped working. We took it to a local video store and for $2 they resurfaced it and it now works with no issues!

Good luck making your decision!

 

[sookie]

try to get them resurfaced?
i dont think the fact that you are a SAH mom or the family size matters either. I think your sis is being really nice about it! just get them professionally resurfaced and move on!

 

[mnasf]

When I give a child permission to play anything of ours, I am holding myself responsible if that child breaks something. If I had a child over my house, even just a friend, and if that child broke a Wii game, I'm not expecting that child to pay for it. That's the risk I take when I give permission. I can't imagine expecting someone to pay for something that they may or may not have broken!

yes, I feel the same way.

 

[mjkacmom]

You mean if I let your 7yr old drive my car, you wouldn't pay for it when he wrecks it? Darn!!!

Of course not - that is why you have car insurance!

 

[Pigeon]

Given your scenario, I would assume my kid did the damage, and I would apologize and replace the game.

The fact that you made the choice to have three kids and be a SAHM is completely irrelevant.

 

[twinmomplus2new]

I would pay for half of the game to be fair. And inform my son he was not allowed to play over her house with video games any more.
No harm no foul. Meet her half way and then let it go.

 

[ceecee]

I don't know the dynamics of your family. But here's what I'd do if I were in your situation.
I would just go ahead and replace the game. And then make it clear (nicely) that you've talked to DS and he understands he's not allowed to handle the games without adult supervision. I'd tell her (and DS) that if she is busy and can't help with the Wii, DS will have to find something else to do. That way, the responsibility is on her so that in the future if she finds damaged games she can't blame DS.

I wouldn't make DS pay for it since you really don't know what happened.

I'm super close to my sis, and I wouldn't want a $40 game to cause any kind of negative feelings.

I agree! Probably would suggest that your DS take his own game next time like a DS or something. Then you wouldn't have to worry about it.

 

[luvthatdisney]

If this were me...I would offer to pay half. Since no one knows for sure who damaged the game, I would think that would be fair. If I knew without question my child did it, I would then pay for the entire game. I would offer that as a solution to the situation and be done with it.

 

[toesmom]

This is somewhat budget related....

My sister emailed me and asked me to talk with my DS (7) because they went to play their Wii and found one of their games not working and a few scratches on some others. They hadn't played the Wii for some time, but said my DS had played it several times at their house. They had given him permission to play the games,and he played it on his own intheir basement.

Now, that very same evening that I get this email, my DH and I both have to talk with same DS about being responsible for his Wii games and DVDs/CDs. We were finding them all over our basement - not in cases - and noticed some scratches as well. We told him he needs to always put them back in their cases and handle them gently.

After getting the email from my sister, we spoke with him AGAIN, and added that from now on, he really needs to have an adult help him with any DVDs or CDs since he doesn't know how to handle them properly.

I email my sister and tell her we spoke with him and have told him he is not allowed to play anything without an adult, and suggest that she not allow him to play the Wii at her house without supervision too.

She writes back "thanks... hope he's not too mad at me.... It's just that one game doesn't work at all now and others are scratched... And we sort of yelled at A [their 3-year-old] thinking that he had done it.... Hope R [my son] isn't mad at us..."

So, twice now she tells me her game is broken, and I think she's hinting that we should replace the game. Thing is, we haven't been to her house for over a month, and I really don't know if my son scratched the game. I am sure he COULD have, but we weren't there long and it was some time ago. She does have a 3-year-old and an infant in her house, so really anything could happen.

Am I obligated to offer to buy a new game for her? Should I be making my DS pay for this?

If I knew he broke the game on purpose (or even if I knew he did it accidentally) I would think we should replace it. But we don't know what happened to it. I have no idea if they played the game since we were there last, or if they had anyone else who played it, or if their son touches the games.

WWYD?

tip for scratched discs: use regular toothpaste, rub on the disc scratches and wash off with water, wipe dry with smooth cloth or towel and voila it will work again.

 

[swissfamilyrobinson]

I haven't read any of the other replies, so this may have already been said. I think I would offer to pay for half of the game and do so by saying this:

"Since we don't know if R (my son) did it or if A (your son) did it, I am perfectly willing to split the cost of the game with you. You just let me know if that's what you'd like."

That then lets her know you acknowledge that your son may have broken the game and you would like to make some type of restitution - but not all - since it's highly possible that her child contributed to "the crime." It also puts the ball in her court and frees her up to come out and say what she is expecting.

I think I would also conclude by saying, "Please know that we would prefer that "R" not play video games unattended anymore - we just can't afford to replace any more games."

 

[*Seanaci*]

I would not pay for a new game. I would not offer to buy a new game.

1) You don't know for certain if it was your son who "broke" it (regardless of how he treats games/dvd's/cd's at home)

2) It took your sister how long to ask that you talk to your son about it? Come on. Something sounds off to me. You have a Wii, but you don't play it more than once a month or so?

3) She's not asking directly for you to replace it...simply dropping hints. Sure, you are picking up on those hints, but it doesn't mean you have to follow through.

And yes, I think it makes a difference that you are a family of 5 and replacing a game that you aren't positive your son broke will put a dent in your budget is a good enough reason to not replace the game.

Good luck!

 

[mamaLori05]

I would not pay for a new game. I would not offer to buy a new game.

1) You don't know for certain if it was your son who "broke" it (regardless of how he treats games/dvd's/cd's at home)

2) It took your sister how long to ask that you talk to your son about it? Come on. Something sounds off to me. You have a Wii, but you don't play it more than once a month or so?

3) She's not asking directly for you to replace it...simply dropping hints. Sure, you are picking up on those hints, but it doesn't mean you have to follow through.

And yes, I think it makes a difference that you are a family of 5 and replacing a game that you aren't positive your son broke will put a dent in your budget is a good enough reason to not replace the game.

Good luck!

That part doesn't sound off to me at all. We also have a wii and don't play it all that often. If someone had played it and scratched a game, I woudn't find out until we went to play it again, which could easily be a month or more later.

 

[badblackpug]

I'm going to take a slightly different tack than the others. Yes, I would replace the game. You don't absolutely know whether or not your son damaged the game, but given the fact that your son has a history of not taking care of his games properly, it is entirely possible. I would also make him pay for the game, and I would explain it to him in the same way. "I can't prove that you did ruin the game, but because I know you don't take of your own games, I also can't prove that you didn't ruin it. Since you don't take care of your own games, I have to assume that you didn't take care of aunties either." I think this will definitely teach him a lesson about taking care of things.

I don't agree with repairing the disc. If you come to my house and break my lamp, I don't want you to glue it back together.

I think it is entirely possible that a couple with 2 very small children don't play with the Wii regularly.

Also I don't think your family situation is relevant. To borrow another car analogy, if you borrow a car and have and accident in it the fact that you don't have an income does not release you from the responsibility of repairing it.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

I would pay for it.
Maybe it took your sister this long to bring it up because she didn't know how to approach you with it. It is hard to tell someone sometimes that their kid did something wrong. She kept looking for reassurance that your son wasn't mad at her. I think she knows he broke it and has been struggling with how to tell you.

I also don't think it matters who makes what money. You break something it is your responsibility even if the owner is a millionare.