The Chatterbox Hyena Thread

[Alex2kMommy]

I just looked Haley up on wiki; did you know he had a DUI (alcohol and pot) in 2006?

 

[eatmypixiedust]

I just looked Haley up on wiki; did you know he had a DUI (alcohol and pot) in 2006?

Really?? I don't know how old he is now.

 

[eatmypixiedust]

I know. DH is very worried about what I'm going to do if someone shows up at the door with a plate of cookies. That's her way of saying "I'm sorry" without actually saying the words. She's done it two or three times before when she's thrown a hissy fit.

This time I've had it. DH says he hopes he's home when it happens because he doesn't want me to make a big stink. (As if! I have never ever been rude to someone at my door.) I want to talk with her and tell her how I feel, not slam the door in her face or say something just to be unkind.

Anyway, he thinks she'll be too cowardly to bring them herself, that she'll send someone else. Honestly I'd have no trouble telling her DH how I feel, either, but if she sent her sweet mother over, I'd have a much harder time. She is a real sweetheart, and I'm not sure how much she knows of what this woman (her daughter) has said and done.

I don't think you would ever slam the door in her face but when you've reached your limit, enough is enough. You and your DH have been nothing but polite to her and her husband. She just seems really odd... and what happends if she causes more drama down the line? She seems to be good at that.

 

[eatmypixiedust]

That's a good idea to just lay the cards out on the table and tell her how you feel. Would she take it the wrong way though or try to twist your words? One of my grandmas tends to do that

 

[Alex2kMommy]

Honestly, I don't know. I can see her twisting the words around to suit her own purposes. She seems to be really into gossiping about others, and in a really nasty way, too... She told me one of the neighbor ladies is a drunk (I have no idea if she is or not, she's just a very sweet person who has been nothing but kind to me AND to the kook); she said another neighbor lady is a huge gossip (again, I like this person as far as I know her, she's never gossiped with me, unlike the kook); and yet another neighbor lady is a "complete B" (because when she's outdoors she doesn't wave to the kook... )

 

[eatmypixiedust]

Honestly, I don't know. I can see her twisting the words around to suit her own purposes. She seems to be really into gossiping about others, and in a really nasty way, too... She told me one of the neighbor ladies is a drunk (I have no idea if she is or not, she's just a very sweet person who has been nothing but kind to me AND to the kook); she said another neighbor lady is a huge gossip (again, I like this person as far as I know her, she's never gossiped with me, unlike the kook); and yet another neighbor lady is a "complete B" (because when she's outdoors she doesn't wave to the kook... )

That is just wrong. IMO, if I knew someone like that, I would stay AWAY from them as much as possible. Maybe she says those comments because she things it will help her gain more friends. My grandma has said crap about me behind my back to two of my aunts. None of it is true and if I confronted her about it she would deny everything and say she never said that. Some people just don't have anything else to do but to cause drama and when there isn't any, they have to make their own drama.

 

[Alex2kMommy]

I just feel I need to tell her to back off. Give us our space! Let us walk out of our house without you suddenly appearing over our shoulder!

Stop asking if the kids can come over; the answer is no. (Actually it's H! NO, but I won't say it like that.) She's been far too inappropriate with DS4 to ever allow them to be there unsupervised ever again.

Stop telling DH bizarre and inappropriate sexual things about yourself, or about how you feel about him. It makes him uncomfortable and I DON'T APPRECIATE IT AT ALL!

 

[eatmypixiedust]

There were a few occassions where my grandma would make something up and blab it to my uncle (something untrue about my dad). Then she would turn around and say something false about my uncle to my dad. Well both of them found out about it and confronted her. She could not say one thing and they were both upset with her for quite some time. My dad told her that sometimes she tells so many lies that it catches up to her in the end.

 

[Alex2kMommy]

That is just wrong. IMO, if I knew someone like that, I would stay AWAY from them as much as possible. Maybe she says those comments because she things it will help her gain more friends. My grandma has said crap about me behind my back to two of my aunts. None of it is true and if I confronted her about it she would deny everything and say she never said that. Some people just don't have anything else to do but to cause drama and when there isn't any, they have to make their own drama.

See, this is exactly how I feel about her. I don't do drama. I don't like it, I have no use for it, and I think it's hurtful. I have no interest in maintaining any sort of relationship with someone who is so high-maintenance!

DH feels that she's just super-immature, like her mental-emotional growth stopped in junior high. GOOD GOD, do you remember what girls are like in junior high? I kid you not, that's what this woman is like. She's in her late 30s but acts like she's 13 or 14. It's pathetic and disgusting. But he feels kind of sorry for her.

 

[eatmypixiedust]

I just feel I need to tell her to back off. Give us our space! Let us walk out of our house without you suddenly appearing over our shoulder!

Stop asking if the kids can come over; the answer is no. (Actually it's H! NO, but I won't say it like that.) She's been far too inappropriate with DS4 to ever allow them to be there unsupervised ever again.

Stop telling DH bizarre and inappropriate sexual things about yourself, or about how you feel about him. It makes him uncomfortable and I DON'T APPRECIATE IT AT ALL!

Yeah, that's not right to ask your kids to go over there and to speak innappropriately towards your DH. That's just wrong!

 

[eatmypixiedust]

See, this is exactly how I feel about her. I don't do drama. I don't like it, I have no use for it, and I think it's hurtful. I have no interest in maintaining any sort of relationship with someone who is so high-maintenance!

DH feels that she's just super-immature, like her mental-emotional growth stopped in junior high. GOOD GOD, do you remember what girls are like in junior high? I kid you not, that's what this woman is like. She's in her late 30s but acts like she's 13 or 14. It's pathetic and disgusting. But he feels kind of sorry for her.

I don't like drama either and when I experience it, I get really stressed out and bummed and it's a headache. I just want things to be okay and not have to deal with crap over something silly or something that is not worth the time. There are more important things in life and if you can avoid "toxic" people, then I'm almost certain that your life would be sooo much happier and better.

 

[eatmypixiedust]

If she's really immature for her age than that would be a red flag for me. The worst is speaking innaproriately to one's spouse. I mean, who does that??? Seriously?? That's just sick and it's wrong!

 

[Alex2kMommy]

I agree, the whole thing has been just really bizarre. In our old neighborhood we had really loud, foul-mouthed neighbors who were constantly shrieking at each other and their kids.

In this neighborhood it was so calm and quiet the first few months, we were in heaven! Then they moved in, and a few months later the weirdness began. She seems to not understand the boundaries of behavior that should not be crossed with children, especially children that are not your own. She talks all the time about other men and how hot they look, right in front of her DH, which I find very strange. Her DH doesn't seem to react, but DH told me, "Good grief, we'd be having serious words if you ever did something like that!"

When you said you just don't want to be involved with toxic people, that's exactly the way I feel about it. But DH feels that, especially since they live right next door, we have to have some sort of relationship with them. I said, "Fine. We're neighbors, we can be cordial and friendly. We do NOT have to be friends. We do not have to spend any time together, have dinner together, invite each other to parties, or any of that. Seriously, I want NOTHING to do with her."

 

[eatmypixiedust]

I agree, the whole thing has been just really bizarre. In our old neighborhood we had really loud, foul-mouthed neighbors who were constantly shrieking at each other and their kids.

In this neighborhood it was so calm and quiet the first few months, we were in heaven! Then they moved in, and a few months later the weirdness began. She seems to not understand the boundaries of behavior that should not be crossed with children, especially children that are not your own. She talks all the time about other men and how hot they look, right in front of her DH, which I find very strange. Her DH doesn't seem to react, but DH told me, "Good grief, we'd be having serious words if you ever did something like that!"

When you said you just don't want to be involved with toxic people, that's exactly the way I feel about it. But DH feels that, especially since they live right next door, we have to have some sort of relationship with them. I said, "Fine. We're neighbors, we can be cordial and friendly. We do NOT have to be friends. We do not have to spend any time together, have dinner together, invite each other to parties, or any of that. Seriously, I want NOTHING to do with her."

That's true, you should not be speaking to children like that and like you said, especially children who are NOT YOURS! That's disturbing.

I can see how your DH would want to be on good terms because they are your neighbors, but I agree with you. You don't have to hang out with them and it's not right to just "pop-in" at any moment. You can still be cordial and say hello but you don't have to be best friends and hang out all the time, you know?

My neighbors are nosey and they are a bit rude. I never once have spoken to them, I don't hang out with them, but if I see them I will wave hello and that's about it.

 

[eatmypixiedust]

Her DH sounds just as odd as she is. It's not okay to speak to anyone innappropriately and it's not okay to make up stories about others and gossip about them behind their backs. It sounds like he's been poisoned by her for years

 

[Alex2kMommy]

That's true, you should not be speaking to children like that and like you said, especially children who are NOT YOURS! That's disturbing.

Oh, she didn't talk like that with the kids, that's with DH and me, though the kids might have been around then. The issue with the kids is far more serious than that, but I don't want to go into it in public, if you know what I mean. Nothing serious happened, but lots of things that just set off all kinds of alarm bells with me. Suffice it to say that I think if her employer knew about things she's said/done, she'd probably be fired on the spot.

 

[eatmypixiedust]

Oh, she didn't talk like that with the kids, that's with DH and me, though the kids might have been around then. The issue with the kids is far more serious than that, but I don't want to go into it in public, if you know what I mean. Nothing serious happened, but lots of things that just set off all kinds of alarm bells with me. Suffice it to say that I think if her employer knew about things she's said/done, she'd probably be fired on the spot.

I think that if anything she says or does is setting alarms off then that is someone that you should not be around. I'm surprised her employer or co-workers haven't seen how she acts or the things she says. Maybe they are afraid to tell her boss

 

[Alex2kMommy]

I think that if anything she says or does is setting alarms off then that is someone that you should not be around. I'm surprised her employer or co-workers haven't seen how she acts or the things she says. Maybe they are afraid to tell her boss

I don't know. I think maybe they DO see how she is, at least on some level. She had one of those in-home parties (to sell products), and invited several neighbors and people from work. This was when I was just starting to get uncomfortable around her, but I had already told her I'd attend her party. So I went.

She had 3 family members and 2 neighbors (including me) there. Apparently lots of people from work said they'd come (after she badgered them), and not one did. She was TICKED OFF. See, if you have to twist people's arms to get them to commit to coming to your party, you shouldn't be surprised when they find another commitment or duty at the last minute.

 

[eatmypixiedust]

I don't know. I think maybe they DO see how she is, at least on some level. She had one of those in-home parties (to sell products), and invited several neighbors and people from work. This was when I was just starting to get uncomfortable around her, but I had already told her I'd attend her party. So I went.

She had 3 family members and 2 neighbors (including me) there. Apparently lots of people from work said they'd come (after she badgered them), and not one did. She was TICKED OFF. See, if you have to twist people's arms to get them to commit to coming to your party, you shouldn't be surprised when they find another commitment or duty at the last minute.

Hmmm...if not one of her co-workers showed up then that is definitely not a good sign. That's wrong to try to force people to show up.

 

[Alex2kMommy]

Uff, I'm getting tired, pixster, so I need to head to bed.
I hope you have a good night's rest.