My issue is they BOTH have unresolved issues and neither can help the other.I actually like them both.
Separately they are great people but they are both going thru major abandonment issues.
I don't think either of them are at fault. I think they both need time to heal and then, maybe after some full on revelations and growing up, get together with a significant other when they're complete people.
Neither are complete people now. If one were it would have a chance but with TWO, wow. Not good.
Yes, they both have problems. They are not a good match.
Brad actually would do better with a Chantal, one who would roll over and give him everything he wants. BUT, with his abandonment & narcissism issues, he wants the
elusive one. The one he can't get, to give in to him. That's his alluring challenge, that stems from his abandonment.
At the core of narcissism, is insecurity and fearing not being good enough. That's why a narcissist has to get constant reassurance from
outside of oneself. Why they constantly feel a need to prove themselves.
Seeing the complete show now, it doesn't occur to anyone else that out of 25 women, he picked the TWO that were emotionally detached at times? And Chantal, as fallback, who said early she'd give him everything. She even nailed him on that during the ATFR show, that he basically thought of her as a fallback to Emily.

The sure thing, he can get - but doesn't really want.
To win the
unattainable, the detached/reserve elusive person is to feed that insecurity. It's an ultimate win. But, it's
temporary. There will never be enough to feed his wound. He has to heal himself from within - and with a GOOD therapist. In retrospect, now, seeing a somewhat more complete picture, Emily is the ultimate win. (Especially out of all the women on the show.)
Brad keeps saying, "I'm a better person because of Emily. . . She makes me a better person." It sounds like a compliment to her - but it is a SELF centered statement on his part. It's really about himself. Feeding that insecurity inside to be better, to be more, to be enough.
Emily has to finish grieving her dead fiance and get closure on that. She needs to take him off that pedestal she has him on, so she can see the men in her present clearly. She also has abandonment issues, she needs to address.
She also just needs to do a lot of dating. Being the Bachelorette would actually have been good for her. It would have been like speed dating with 25 men. Which she needs.

She needs to be able to see men more clearly and choose more wisely.
In some ways, this relationship with Brad has been good for her - of she gets out in time before too much emotional battering is done to her and Ricki.
She apparently likes high profile men, as her dead fiance was a famous race car driver. The Brad as the Bachelor. She had Brad up on a pedestal, too, because he was the handpicked "Bachelor." But
who picked him? What made them any kind of authority about men?
Moving from being on a pedestal to toppling down to volatile anger issues with a narcissist who needs to get his way, maybe this is boot camp for her.
Maybe falling in love again for the first time after Ricky, this being the "rebound relationship," she will get some of her own healing done, and be ready for her right relationship with the next guy. One who is sharing, caring, open and available and inclusive to her and Ricki.