Question about playdate for 7 year old boys?

[mommy22pumpkins]

Hello. I was wondering if anyone could give me any tips or advice about having a playdate. My son just turned 7 and exchanged phone numbers with a little boy from class. Long story short his mom and him are coming over for a *playdate* tomorrow. I have no idea how to entertain this little boy or his mom if she stays.

Anyone have any ideas on what food I should have in or things to do. I know they want to play with the Wii- this is my sons favorite thing in the world right now and apparently why they are such good buddies. I just was hoping to plan something fun for them to do other than play video games.

any ideas? I am really clueless about this and just want to make sure they have fun.

thanks so much in advance!

 

[tarazandra]

I rarely plan anything for a playdate. The goal, in my opinion, is friends getting together for free form fun; whether that's games, toys or just using their imaginations. As for the mom, just sit down with her and chat. You don't need full refreshments, but drinks and possibly cookies are always appreciated.

If the kids like each other, they'll have fun, no worries

 

[GRUMPY D]

if your going to have snacks please ask the parents if there child has any food alleges , kids sometimes forget to tell you these impotent things

 

[hockeymom3]

We have oodles of friends for playdates and whatever you plan they won't do!!

The first comple of times its the "new" excitement of having the kid at your house that they'll play everything for 10 mins and switch to something else.

They just play!! They entertain themselves, and it gives you a break!!

 

[Aliceacc]

Have your son put away any possession he can't stand to share or is afraid of breaking. Then just let them play.

If you don't know mom well, she may stay. Make a pot of coffee or some tea, or offer her a soda. Talk about the kids, the school, and the upcoming summer vacation.

 

[zoemurr]

if the friend has no dairy problems: smoothies

I make them at home and DS had them at a playdate and thought the mom was so cool.

We just dump in a few yougurts, milk, and whatever fruit we have on hand into the blender My kids love them, and they are healthy.

I agree to just let them play. If they are going to do wii I would set the timer for 30min and the rest of the time they have to "play"... hopefully outside. Talk to your son a bit beforehand and give him some ideas. My son is 7 and I'd say we've had hundreds of playdates.. I entertain them much more when they don't have a friend over.

Hang out with the mom.. you'll probably make a new friend too. My son (also 7) really wanted to hang out with someone from school. I don't know the mom very well yet, but she was there for me at the last minute to watch DS when I needed to take DD somewhere. (After I hung out with her and we had a few playdates.)

Sorry if this sounds judgemental, but I'm surprised you've never had kids over before. We've had playgroups/get togethers since my oldest was 6 weeks old.

Don't stress over it.. have fun!

 

[MSSANDRA]

Just relax and let the kids play. Snacks are a must for boy's play dates. I would encourage the mom to stay so you can get to know her as a return play date at her house may be the next step and you need to see if that is an option for you. Two 7 year olds will be happy for a few hours with the Wii.

 

[mommy22pumpkins]

Thanks for all the great tips. The playdate went really well from what my husband said. I just basically chatted with the mom for a few minutes then she left and my husband watched them for a few hours while I went and got a nap before work(I work nights). I think in the future though I will stick to birthday parties or hm being invited somewhere as it was really quite awkward. But the two of them got along great and had a really nice time together so I'm glad it worked out this time.


thanks again I really aprreciate all your help

 

[MSSANDRA]

Please do not rule out future play dates for your child. They provide important social skills that he needs. Most parents sorta of do a "turn" thing for play dates so if you do not have them, he may not get invited to others. Most close friendships also form through play dates. What was awkard??
Maybe you can adjust that to see what will work for your family!

 

[hockeymom3]

I'm curious too, what was akward??

None of the parents ever stay at my playdates - but we chat and I have made good neighbours because of this. It also makes me feel a lot better knowing who he is spending his time with when he goes on playdates...and now the occasional sleepover.

 

[Fabinva]

Originally posted by MSSANDRA
Please do not rule out future play dates for your child. They provide important social skills that he needs. Most parents sorta of do a "turn" thing for play dates so if you do not have them, he may not get invited to others. Most close friendships also form through play dates.

I agree...while it is not always fun to have the boys over to play I do my part as my son has two close friends and they rotate houses for play and ocasional sleep overs.

 

[ilovejack02]

Thanks for all the great tips. The playdate went really well from what my husband said. I just basically chatted with the mom for a few minutes then she left and my husband watched them for a few hours while I went and got a nap before work(I work nights). I think in the future though I will stick to birthday parties or hm being invited somewhere as it was really quite awkward. But the two of them got along great and had a really nice time together so I'm glad it worked out this time.


thanks again I really aprreciate all your help

Why would you stop doing it?

Having friends over on a Sat afternoon or spending the night are one of the many wonderful memories I have of my childhood.
My oldest is 20 and I always let him have the kiddos over.. I was more than happy to host because I knew where he was at all times LOL, he also thought I was the coolest mom .. which is a plus.

I am doing the same with my 6 yr old now.
And yes the others are right.. if you never do any inviting , most likely he wont be invited to play at other's house after awhile.

 

[mjkacmom]

If it was awkward at all, that's probably because it's new - most kids have playdates starting when they're toddlers. This is a major way of how kids form friendships - ds doesn't have "playdates" anymore, but just plays with his friends, the same friends we had playdates with. Also, if you don't invite other kids to your home, the other parents will be resentful, and will stop inviting your ds over.

 

[mommy22pumpkins]

Maybe you didn't understand my first post...my son invited his friend over for a playdate. I will now leave it up to the other child to invite my son over to his house as I don't believe in badgering or harrassing people.

I will be more than happy to invite other children over if my son asks to have his friends over again. Which he is already asking about for next weekend. But try to understand that my husband and I both work full time and it sound like most of you who have responded don't. I am a nurse and have a stressful job and alot of other responsibitly besides just staying home with the kids. I know that is a stressful job in itself. But it doesn't compare to having to work full time on top of taking care of two kids.

So please forgive me if I worded it wrong. Awkward was a bad word- I guess stressful would have been a better word as I had to go into work all night that night from 7P to 7 AM. Unless you have been there please don't pretend to know how stressful that is.

I have worked weekends for that last 7years in order to spend time with my kdis and be there for them as much as possible. We have spent every summer together and spent lots of quality time together as a family. I've taken them on every outing you can imagine- zoo's, aquariums, playgrounds, beach, etc. I have done my best to provide them with tons of positive experiences and make their existence as happy and educational as possible. I just wanted some creative ideas on how to make a playdate fun not how to raise my children- no offense!

thanks again for all who contributed positive advice and ideas. That's what this board is about and I am eternally grateful for your advice and support. I hope to return the favor sometime.

 

[mjkacmom]

Maybe you didn't understand my first post...my son invited his friend over for a playdate. I will now leave it up to the other child to invite my son over to his house as I don't believe in badgering or harrassing people.

I will be more than happy to invite other children over if my son asks to have his friends over again. Which he is already asking about for next weekend. But try to understand that my husband and I both work full time and it sound like most of you who have responded don't. I am a nurse and have a stressful job and alot of other responsibitly besides just staying home with the kids. I know that is a stressful job in itself. But it doesn't compare to having to work full time on top of taking care of two kids.

So please forgive me if I worded it wrong. Awkward was a bad word- I guess stressful would have been a better word as I had to go into work all night that night from 7P to 7 AM. Unless you have been there please don't pretend to know how stressful that is.

I have worked weekends for that last 7years in order to spend time with my kdis and be there for them as much as possible. We have spent every summer together and spent lots of quality time together as a family. I've taken them on every outing you can imagine- zoo's, aquariums, playgrounds, beach, etc. I have done my best to provide them with tons of positive experiences and make their existence as happy and educational as possible. I just wanted some creative ideas on how to make a playdate fun not how to raise my children- no offense!

thanks again for all who contributed positive advice and ideas. That's what this board is about and I am eternally grateful for your advice and support. I hope to return the favor sometime.

Sorry, you post did seem to imply that you didn't want to have kids over ever again. I'm glad to see that's not the case. I don't think anyone questioned your parenting. As a SAHM, I have run into a few parents who never reciprocate, and it's frustrating (one mom actually calls me to see if her dd can come over here, because she has to go to work).

 

[rodeo65]

Sorry, you post did seem to imply that you didn't want to have kids over ever again. I'm glad to see that's not the case. I don't think anyone questioned your parenting. As a SAHM, I have run into a few parents who never reciprocate, and it's frustrating (one mom actually calls me to see if her dd can come over here, because she has to go to work).

Just jumping in here to ask what is UP with that? DH loves to make fun of the fact that I frequently end up carting the kids' friends around. For the most part the play dates we had in the past were MY friends and then the kids would just play together while the mommies chatted. Now that they are in school, there are several parents that seem to think that because I'm a SAHM that that equals babysitter. I have no problem having them over and I do like to know where my kids are but a little reciprocity would be nice.

 

[ilovejack02]

So sorry to imply that you need parenting help.

I did just notice you have several little kiddos, Im in awe. My hubby and I laugh that I would need heavy medication to have more than one at a time. I think that is why I dont mind playdates too much. I can send them all home.

I worked when I had my oldest , but now get to stay home with DS6.

I get how stressful it is, DH works nights, so when we have playdates, I have to keep the kiddos wrangled to one part of the house or outside. Not easy.. and DH sometimes wakes up a tad grumpy.

I havent found a way really to do planned activities with them. They tend to just like to go off on their own. I do have the place stacked with drinks and snacks, bubbles, sidewalk chalk. If a kiddo is sleeping over I try to have the latest movie in the house. I also will request the other parents to maybe bring the kiddos bike, or if it is summer to pack a swimsuit since we usually have the sprinklers going or kiddie pools blown up.

 

[mom2princessj]

I never really plan anything just let the kids (and weather) dictate what they want to do. If I'm having them over when we plan to eat lunch or whatever I always ask the parent if its ok if they eat with us and ask if what I'm making is ok. Normally the playdates I have though include my friends so they are always staying to visit while the kids play. Maybe next year it will be different since dd will be in a new school with new friends.

 

[MoniqueU]

I just can't help myself. You are not the only working parent in the world and not the only one with a stressful job. Your post was a bit demeaning to SAHMs/SAHDs. There was a time when I was home with the kids but they were all 5 and under and my husband worked more hours then a hospital resident. We still managed playdates without it being "awkward".
w

 

[mommy22pumpkins]

I'm sorry I did not mean to offend any SAHM or SAHD's. I was just a bit offended that someone implied my kids have been deprived in some way because we have not been invited to or initiated more playdates. I'm sorry I ever started this thread and will not be turning here for advice in the future.