Thank you to all who posted your thoughts and advice in our situation. Tell me what you think of my possible worse case plan. We arrive on the 17th of Aug. at pop for our room only if mum can't come what if I talk direct to guest services at Pop upon arrival regarding the checking in for the following day where our actual package begins?? I am wondering if less mistakes may occur if i do it face to face? I wouldnt want things to e can elled by mistake just altered. This is so mucked up. Thank you janetb for your thoughts I appreciate any positive hope!
As I stated before, I feel fairly certain that they will not be able to alter the package that way at the front desk. They are VERY limited on what they can do. Trust me... We have checked into POP Six times this year!

It seemed we were always needing to change something!! One time DD was adding me to the room at 11:30PM for me to come in the next day and I wanted to catch Magical Express at 10am the next morning! Well ME doesn't even open to book until 8am and my flight left at 7:50am.

We have run the entire gammet of issues. Needing to add a night at the last minute... thank goodness the hotel wasn't very busy!!

But when it came to applying discount codes, and adding things like dining, they just can't do that at the front desk... So I am thinking you are going to have no choice but to call. The problem lies in that if you don't travel until August 17, you may get stuck paying the bill. Yes, Disney is usually VERY GOOD about hardship cases and medical situations. BUT, you can't count on them to Definitely give you your money back. That said, I guess it comes down to how much of a chance are you willing to take and how upset are you going to be if they don't give you your money back for her portion. I think your chances are excellent that they will/would, BUT it's just not a GUARANTEE. KWIM? But I really think you will have NO choice but to do this via phone. Trust me after MY own personal mess with my June reservation and that was using the Cast Member reservation line

, I understand not wanting to call... I truly do! LOL! Mine was an awful mess and thankfully two WONDERFUL front desk mgrs at POP were able to straighten my mess out. I found out just a couple of days before we were due to arrive that my ressie had been cancelled even though the deposit was paid!

Mine was a Cast Member reservation (which is a totally different beast as far as how you pay) and NO ONE could figure out why it got cancelled???

I could have potentially showed up and not had a reservation because of glitch!
I know you this must be terribly frustrating and you feel like you are between a rock and a hard place but I would think you should have a strong idea at least a few days ahead of time if she's going to be able to make it or not... I'm really sorry!

Sending well wishes your way!!