Organizing a large family trip with different bank accounts

[Cj2017]

I'm organizing a big family trip for this October. Everyone wants to stay at the same resort, visit the parks together and have meals together. When I took this on I was excited, but now I'm running into walls and don't know how to handle it.

Family A wants to stay at certain deluxe hotels but family B and C cant afford to stay at deluxe and want to do moderates. Family A is offering to cover the differences for family B & C. Family B & C are being hard headed don't want the help and rather use money to go to events like Halloween party. Family A sends out mass text messaging to everyone being dramatic that they will cover everyone's trip cost and this is just week 1!

Need help guys planning trips for big groups. I feel like I'm going to run into more problems as we get into dinning, parks etc . Any advice?

 

[Belle1962]

This will be long. I’ve organized a few large trips with my family. The largest being 23 family. It sounds like you have some of the same issues we did. All trains need a conductor and you are it. Plan the trip as you would for yourself and your own family. Everyone else can be passengers and chose what stops to get off and on at. Unless you live with these people 24/7 at home you will not want to virtually live all day with them in a park-which a park can bring out attitudes as the day wears on or someone wants to throw a kink in the plans.
You will NOT able to make everyone happy at all times.
Plan a non-park day so everyone can take a break. Some people might opt for pool time, while others go to a park to either catch up on what they missed or they know they’ll want to spend time at or sleep.

You stay out of as many $ discussions as possible.

People have different parenting styles. So stay out of that one.

Not everyone will want to ride all of the exact rides which makes fastpasses very difficult. Family A wonders why got xxx 1st tier and not xxx. So get a top 3 list from everyone.

Not everyone will want same meals. Example boys don’t want to do princess meals or some people just don’t want to do one.

What worked best for us was a general plan of attack. It sounds like you might need one big newsletter now in order to get peoples opinions. I sent monthly ones out since we had over a year to plan. First newsletter for me was accommodations. I explained the different levels, any special offers, and for them to have a plan b hotel in case your their choice isn’t available. Then make your own.

The remainder were;

meals-what meals would you like to do ranked 1-3 and what meals don’t you want to do 1-3 and would not join the family for
and with tips and tricks for eating cheap in the park;

what are some non-park activities

overall touring style: are you a rope drop family or sleep in family? Do you expect to stay late for fireworks? Will one of you ( for each family be willing to be the parade or fireworks)

So the “general plan” which was shared with everyone: meet at xxx point INSIDE the park at xxx time after rope drop; when where meals are-around late breakfast or early lunch ( those that sleep in can decide if they want to meet you there to eat or meet after meal (after all, they’ll know where to find you); where and what time fastpasses are (again-people can catch up to you there); if possible what time and where for a second meal; where parade/fireworks “sitter” should meet and what time. If you don’t send a representative we can’t guarantee a spot close by will be free if there are any shows with a specific time plan ahead which show you are going to and what time (again-they will know where to find you)

You will need to link all MDE accounts together.

If you are using your credit card to hold all ADR’s then ask everyone to send you a deposit equal to the no show fee which you will give back to them at a restaurant WHEN they show up for that meal.

Send out final plan as soon as you are done and gently let people know that you hope they will be able to meet together as a group at one of the times listed. And that they are free to adapt it to fit their family’s needs.

Rememberlan “your trip” and everyone else can choose what parts of it they’d like.

Wow-this got really long. Sorry about that.

 

[PollyannaMom]

Belle is spot on with the "train" approach! - I think big group events go better if each family does their own thing and then meets for special parts of the trip.

I don't know what to tell you about the money issue. I would have said that one group paying the difference for the deluxe would cause embarrassment/resentment (unless maybe it was parents paying for their kids/grandkids) but when when I read this:

...rather use money to go to events like Halloween party.

I realized it's bigger than that! Family A is offering one thing, and family B&C are actually asking for something else? - Yikes!

Need help guys planning trips for big groups. I feel like I'm going to run into more problems as we get into dinning, parks etc . Any advice?

Disney used to have special coordinators for big groups. I think it was called "Grand Gatherings" or something?? Poke around the website and see whether it still exists.

 

[Alesia]

If everyone tries to stay together, no one will have a good time.

My advice is to let everyone plan their own trip and try to meet up for a meal or something every day

 

[lanejudy]

Everyone wants to stay at the same resort...
Family A wants to stay at certain deluxe hotels but family B and C cant afford to stay at deluxe and want to do moderates...

This right here is the problem. Family A is pulling a powerplay by offering to pay the difference -- essentially saying "I have more money so I get to make the choices." No way, if you allow that to happen, it won't end there. It's ok for families to spend their money differently.

Since everyone can't agree on a resort, each family stays at the resort of their choice. Bottom line. Each family gets their choice of tickets and add-on activities. With a large group, just try to meet up each day for a meal or a couple of rides.

Enjoy your vacation!

 

[tguz]

If you still WANT to be the one who puts things together, put it all down on paper as to the dates and resort suggestions, park hopper, meal plan, photo pass with all the costs associated. Each family gets a copy and they can cross out any add ons they do not want and they have a blue print for their vacation. Then every family can go online and book their trip on their own or use an agent. That way, there are no hard feelings later because if you booked it all, there will be people "not wanting to do that" or "not wanting to eat there".

 

[Darcy03231]

I've organized a family trip with differing budgets. Everyone stayed at the resort they personally wanted to. We did one meal together per day as a family, usually breakfast or dinner. Other than that everyone did what they wanted. We ended meeting up in the parks more often than we thought we would and smaller family groups formed and reformed doing some things together throughout the week. With kids of all different ages it would have been impossible to keep everyone together all day for a week!

 

[PhDisney]

In the midst of planning a trip for 27 right now! Ours range from 4 months old to 85. We have two hotels - a deluxe and a moderate. We're doing some meals in small groups, one meal with the whole group, and planned which parks we'd be in partially together. Some of us overlapped some fastpasses, and we're all doing a dessert party together after the group dinner. Other than that, we're not trying to do everything together.

I think you should plan maybe 1 daily get together and beyond that maybe just go to the same parks. Maybe have one full group FP+. If you try to do everything together it's gonna cause friction. Not everyone values the same stuff (like deluxe hotel vs additional parties) and large enough groups will add significant wait times, making everyone cranky.

 

[Scrapmom3]

Cj2017, I wish I had a good strategy for you. I love Belle's image of the train approach. I'm the "conductor" for our October train--myself, DH, six adult children, and a 2-yr. old. How large is your group, and how many children? Like your group, everybody in my group says they want to stay together for everything, but in my case, nobody seems to be interested in the details, and I'm not sure it's going to work out that everybody stays together happily simply because touring with a little one is so much different than touring with just adults. Because it is a family vacation, I am paying for a room for each family (I chose a moderate resort) as well as three days of single-park passes for each adult and a gift card for each family that is basically the equivalent of the Quick Service DDP. The idea of getting everybody together for ADRs was mind-blowing (and paying for table service for this large a group was also budget-blowing). I tried the printed newsletter plan-of-attack approach over two weeks ago and it wasn't successful. It only works if people will read it. One family member actually threw up her hands and refused to accept the print-out, saying she was overloaded in life and could not add another thing to her plate at this time. I felt embarrassed and ashamed, which is not the way I had expected to feel in offering a family vacation. To my knowledge, nobody else has read the printout, though all insist they are excited about the trip and most have said they are willing to "go with the flow"--but we all know how "going with the flow" works out at WDW. Especially with the crowd levels I've been reading about, a "flow" is not a good strategy. My print-outs included park and FP+ suggestions as I was hoping to get an idea of which parks were preferred. We have three days, so I wanted to begin there: two parks and a rest day? Two MK days and one AK day? A different park every day? In a group text I did manage to get verbal commitments from most to a general plan of a rope-drop start each day with a long mid-day break, but the jury is still out as to three days or two days in the parks. The print-outs also asked if people wanted to self-pay for a character meal for the little one, but that's up in the air, too. To be honest, after my print-out experience and a few attempts to bring up the trip conversationally, I am now a bit leery of even bringing up the topic for discussion as I feel like a nag. So if my ADR window for a character meal comes and goes, so be it. Where I am now, Belle's train approach is definitely working for me--I am continuing to refine the plan I sketched out in my print-out as I learn new information, and am expecting that each family will modify the plan to their own needs.

 

[Cj2017]

Thanks for all the tips! I just had to step away last night from the computer because it was too much. We are doing 5 days at Disney and 3 at universal. The universal part is pretty easy because we are all staying at hard rock and using express passes.

I woke up this morning to texts from everyone arguing about “Mickeys Halloween party vs Universal horror nights” one family says no horror nights to scary for kids and other saying Mickeys party to kiddie for their kids”.

I’m going to have to throw down the hammer today because some them have the idea of “well mom is going with us so she can just watch the kids while we go to universal horror nights” that makes me mad because my mom watches all our kids all year long so we don’t have to pay for day care and she should be able to enjoy this break too. I’m going to have to set that straight today.

I liked all the tips especially the breaking off to small meals because I know that will help.

 

[Cj2017]

I only mentioned 3 families but there will be like 4-5. I’m getting that too where it’s like “Cj you plan everything and I will just give you the money” we will just go with it.

another problem is there are 9 nieces and nephews ages 6-17 that talk about this trip 24/7 on snap chat everyday. It’s a kids only thing and they include me in it. Everyday they post countdown calander and thoughts. The last two days it’s been “well my dad said we aren’t going with you guys to X because we can’t afford to” it’s just so many fires I need to put out

 

[PhDisney]

Oh I would have thrown a fit! I think a big part of what's making my planning so easy is I set expectations early. I made a big guide and gave a PowerPoint presentation to talk about what was realistic, and included sample budgets too. It sounds like your family is asking you to read their minds while having unrealistic expectations for what a trip that large can really be like!

 

[_19disnA]

If this is a large group, I think you need to let each family do much of their own planning, especially where to stay, transportation, etc. It would be a mistake to all go to a specific park thinking everyone will want to do the same things. Other then suggesting places to meet as a group for a meal, I think you should stay out of the rest of the planning. Eventually, no one will be happy and they will just blame you for what they didn't like.

 

[PhDisney]

In fact, here: I had a big group meeting using the PowerPoint to get everyone in a room and lay out what I was willing to help with and what decisions they needed to make. The exit buddy system has been a godsend: everyone chose a smaller 2-8 person group to do MOST activities with, and then we did a few full group things. I also used the PDF so they knew their options (a bit out of date now - I'm updating this week!)

Pdf

PowerPoint

(My phone won't let me attach the files so Google doc links it is!)

 

[jo-jo]

If two families want moderate and one wants deluxe, how about staying at Caribbean beach and Riviera.

 

[Scrapmom3]

In fact, here: I had a big group meeting using the PowerPoint to get everyone in a room and lay out what I was willing to help with and what decisions they needed to make. The exit buddy system has been a godsend: everyone chose a smaller 2-8 person group to do MOST activities with, and then we did a few full group things. I also used the PDF so they knew their options (a bit out of date now - I'm updating this week!)

Pdf

PowerPoint

(My phone won't let me attach the files so Google doc links it is!)

This is great, thanks so much for sharing! I'm actually putting together a little questionnaire now. Your materials are VERY thorough!

 

[cgattis]

In fact, here: I had a big group meeting using the PowerPoint to get everyone in a room and lay out what I was willing to help with and what decisions they needed to make. The exit buddy system has been a godsend: everyone chose a smaller 2-8 person group to do MOST activities with, and then we did a few full group things. I also used the PDF so they knew their options (a bit out of date now - I'm updating this week!)

Pdf

PowerPoint

(My phone won't let me attach the files so Google doc links it is!)

Wow, that’s amazing. That’s a lot of info captured there for those families. Kudos to you!! (Although I’m extremely disappointed that you led them astray WRT Brown Derby....). Until they try to plan a trip on their own, they won’t totally appreciate the work that went into just capturing all that for them! I know all that info exists here and I lots of other places, but I think you did a great job of organizing it in a non-intimidating way. Again, great job.

 

[PhDisney]

Wow, that’s amazing. That’s a lot of info captured there for those families. Kudos to you!! (Although I’m extremely disappointed that you led them astray WRT Brown Derby....).

Thank you so much!! My philosophy was that if they knew what I knew, they could make their own choices.

And I just won't be burned by Brown Derby again! Such bad service both times, broke my heart because food and theme are amazing.

 

[cgattis]

Thank you so much!! My philosophy was that if they knew what I knew, they could make their own choices.

And I just won't be burned by Brown Derby again! Such bad service both times, broke my heart because food and theme are amazing.

Aw, that stinks. We’ve never had that experience. I always say, the only thing consistent at Disney is inconsistency Maybe you’ll give it a third try one of these days (although DH says Tony’s only got two strikes LOL so I understand!).

 

[disneydreamer1980]

We usually go as a group of 9 but there have been 2 trips in the past few years that had 18, with varied “bank accounts” as well. A few of us were DVC and stayed in a grand villa one family went for POFQ and one for ASMo. We didn’t even attempt to get everyone in the same resort. We would meet for one meal a day, all together (usually dinner) and we planned to be in the same parks each day but beyond that we were pretty much separate, though we did run into each other a lot in the parks and the older kids/teens went off in their own group frequently while parents with little ones stayed together, etc. Before the trips we held Disney meetings to work everything out. Was fun but not eager to do it again, lol