Off-topic randomness - a place to ramble?

[Captain Brain]

Random Thought of the Day:Carpe Diem(I think I spelled this right)

 

[marypops!]

here to waste space yay



na let me think of something to say err














TOAST!!

 

[JeanJoe]

I need to confess. I believe I have violated the ultimate holiday taboo. This morning, desperately hungry, looking around and finding nothing else to eat... I finally realized I had no other resort, no other options.

I ate the fruitcake.

What have I done?!?!!

I think back, on the until now, unbroken chain of giving. Fruitcake given, fruitcake received. From person to person, a link stretching far into the past. Who knows how many years this fruitcake had passed hands? And now, in a fit of unthinking hunger, I have ended the fruitcake passing tradition.

I'm also worried. These things aren't actually meant to be consumed, are they?

Edited to add: quite clearly, my morning coffee has not kicked in yet.

 

[Funniebunny]

We have finally put up our Christmas tree
This year we have opted for a real one so after buying the tree and driving back with it stuck through the front seats of the car we get it home to find that it doesn't actually fit into the tree stand! Luckily my Mum's partner is at hand with a pen knife to try and get the trunk down to the right size. After 20 minutes of sawing we finally have a tree standing proud, but most of the needles are on the floor as well as a few creepy crawlies. It is now too late to decorate it as I totally misjudged how big this tree was going to be and only bought 1 set of lights.
After another trip to the hardware store we now have a fully decorated tree, lights in the window and a wreath on the door. I'm now in the festive mood and will be playing Christmas songs until the new year.
(I must admit the smell was beautiful as I walked into the lounge the next morning but I think the artificial tree will be coming out next year.)

 

[MiakodaWDW]

I have a few questions/comments:

To JeanJoe/Bezoar: What is the deal with the fruitcake thing? I guess my family and friends never participated in THAT tradition. So people really pass the same fruitcake to each other every year? I've never eaten a fruitcake: do they go bad? EW!!!

To everyone talking about FedEx-ing snow....are you seriously doing that???? Or joking?

And to all kids who have snow days from school...yay! I know how you feel: I am so glad I was a kid in NC instead of FL....snow days were the best (even if you have to make them up later...ah, who cares; it's next year!) I can remember sitting on the edge of my seat watching the closed school list roll by on the TV with my Mom...praying...and then the joy of seeing my school and immediately running back to bed!!! I always wondered why Mom looked disappointed...wasn't she happy for me?!

~Mia~

 

[BuddyGenie]

Hey, I like fruitcake. It's not often I get to indulge in something that dense. Of course, if it's got liquor in it...

 

[Tishke]

So, we've just gotten back from visiting my husband's grandfather in ICU back where we moved from. Five hours in the car each way. Between the car ride and DH's family, I was feeling stressed. It was all quiet in the house when my DS 6 starts yelling "Alert ALERT ALERT!!!!" I come running to where he is in the hallway in front of the bathroom. He stares at me with these huge eyes and says, MOM THERE IS A FROG IN THE TOILET!!! I think, yeah right. I look in the toilet, and nothing but water in the bowl. I start to tell him he is seeing things when right under the rim of the toilet I meet a set of creepy googly eyes.

Yes Virginia, there is a frog in the toilet. So, now we sit and wait for DH to get home with the lid down on the toilet. I am sooo not touching a frog!!

 

[lajones81]

To everyone talking about FedEx-ing snow....are you seriously doing that???? Or joking?

I'm not sure about everyone else, but I really am FedEx-ing the snow.

 

[MiakodaWDW]

....there is a frog in the toilet. So, now we sit and wait for DH to get home with the lid down on the toilet. I am sooo not touching a frog!!

I am SO with you on that one. I am terrified of frogs...they creep me out. Glad I'm not the only one. One time there was a frog on our patio, and my fiance, CoughCoolGhoul, was going out there. It was near the door and I told him to get it away before it came inside. I was inside and he faked like he was throwing the frog at me. Of course I knew he would never do that, but my instinct made me flinch. I actually cried! He was so sorry that he had upset me so much, it was cute the way he apologized over and over. Frogs, spiders, centipedes, moths: these are creatures I am not thrilled about.

And Bubbasfriend: how exactly are you Fed-Exing snow??? Just curious! If you have not sent it yet, maybe you could send me some! I have not seen snow in a long long long time! It's really hard to get into the Holiday spirit in Florida. The only way I can do it is to drive down this famous street where everyone decorates their houses as gaudily as possible with lights and everything you can think of. Almost the whole neighborhood gets into it, but one street in particular EVERYONE does it. They even string lights across the street from house to house....cars drive by very slowly and the traffic is insane! Everyone who lives there stands in their yards waving to the cars, singing, and sometimes giving out candy and cookies. There is nothing like driving through there, playing Christmas music on the radio, and singing along to get you in the Holiday mood! If anyone lives in Tampa you know where I mean.

~Mia~

 

[MiakodaWDW]

bump.

 

[Tishke]

Does anyone else have a MIL who seems intent on making your blood pressure rise?

Case in point: My MIL asked what she could get DS for Christmas, and we told her he is dying to get this one video game. We were going to buy it, but if she wanted to get it, that would be fine. Great, she says. Flash forward to today when she calls DH and tells him she just sent money today. It's a week before Christmas, the game is sold out everywhere and I am being a lunatic trying to find the game or something else. Arg.....that's all I can say.....Arg!

 

[marypops!]

Things to do in the elevator!!
1. When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.

2.Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.

3.Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.

4.Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor your on.

5.Hold the doors open and say your waiting for a friend. After a while, let the doors close, and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?"

6.Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, "That's Mine!"

7.Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.

8.Move your desk into the elevator and whenever anyone gets on, ask if they have an appointment.

9.Lay down the twister mat and ask people if they would like to play.

10.Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking.

11.Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.

12.Ask, "Did you feel that?"

13.Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally.

14.When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay, don't panic, they open again!"

15 Swat at flies that don't exist.

16.Tell people that you can see their aura.

17.Call out, "Group Hug!" and then enforce it.

18.Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you just shut up!"

19.Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?"

20.Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

21.Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "Your One of THEM!" and back away slowly.

22.Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passengers.

23.Listen to the elevator walls with your stethoscope.

24.Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

25.Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, "I have new socks on".

26.Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers, "This is MY personal space!"

 

[MiakodaWDW]

Things to do in the elevator!!

LOL, I love this. I read a similar one that is "fun things to do in Walmart". I'll try to find it and post it here. My Fave on this list is:

25.Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, "I have new socks on".

I don't know why I like that one, I just do It's like something I would do

~Mia~

 

[Alyce]

SO Funny !



Thank You so much for the tears of laughter !
these are my favorites !​

Things to do in the elevator!!

4.Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor your on.

5.Hold the doors open and say your waiting for a friend. After a while, let the doors close, and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?"


8.Move your desk into the elevator and whenever anyone gets on, ask if they have an appointment.

9.Lay down the twister mat and ask people if they would like to play.


11.Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.

14.When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay, don't panic, they open again!"

15 Swat at flies that don't exist.

16.Tell people that you can see their aura.

17.Call out, "Group Hug!" and then enforce it.

18.Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you just shut up!"

19.Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?"

20.Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

22.Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passengers.

25.Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, "I have new socks on".

 

[MiakodaWDW]

69 Things to do at Walmart (taken from Ehumorcentral....edited by me for explicit content, edits and personal comments by me made in brackets [like this])

1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.

2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.

3.Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.

4. Start playing Football; see how many people you can get to join in.

5. Run up to an employee (preferrebly a male) while squeezing your legs together and practically yell at him " I need some tampons!!"

6. Try on bras in the sewing/fabric department.

7. Try on bras over top of your clothes.

8. Make a trail of orange juice on the ground, leading to the restrooms

9. While walking around the store, sing in your loudest voice possible "[beep] and candy"

10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in Housewares," and see what happens.

11. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volumes to "10".

12. Play with the automatic doors.

13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!..." etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.

14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who BUYS this [crap], anyway?"

15. Repeat Number 14 in the jewelry department.

16. Try putting different pairs of women's panties on your head and walk around the store casually.

17. Leave small sacrifices or gifts in the hands of the mannequins.

18. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.

19. As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow. Magic!"

20. Put M&M's on layaway.

21. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.

22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.

23. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.

24. Nonchalantly "test" the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.

25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "...I'm Batman. Come, Robin--to the Batcave!"

26. TP as much of the store as possible.

27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles. [I have actually done this...as a young teen Don't worry, I threw packages of toilet paper or bread loaves, nothing that would hurt! It was fun! Do it like 3 aisles over if you have a good arm, so they won't know it was you ]

28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hell[o]" upside down.

29. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"

30. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, "Red Rover!"

31. Look right into the security camera, and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.

32. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.

33. Take bets on the battle described above.

34. Set up another battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. G.I. Janes. (Red lipstick might give an interesting effect!!!)

35. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible.

36. While no one's watching quickly switch the men's and women's signs on the doors of the rest room.

37. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission:Impossible." [this sounds like fun]

38. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.

39. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.

40. Fill your cart with boxes of ["protection"], and watch everyone's jaws drop when you attempt to buy them.

41. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.

42. Two words: "Marco Polo."

43. Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle,etc.

44. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's in Electronics.

45. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look with various funnels.

46. Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse through, say things like "the fat man walks alone," and scare them into believing that the clothes are talking to them.

47. While walking around alone, pretend someone is with you and get into a very serious conversation. Ex: The person is breaking up with you and you begin crying "How could you do this to me? I thought you loved me! I knew there was another girl, but I thought I had won. You kissed ME darling." Then act as though you are being beaten and fall onto the ground screaming and having convulsions.

48. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "No, no! It's those voices again!"

49. Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out.

50. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.

51. Get a stuffed animal and go to the front of the store and begin stroking it lovingly, saying "Good girl, good bessie."

52. Go over to the shoe department and try on every pair of shoes, not putiing one pair back. Take the paper from the boxes and throw it in various aisles.

53. When someone steps away from their cart to look at something,quickly make off with it without saying a word. [it would also be fun to shop from other people's carts. If they say "hey, that's mine!" say something like, "it's not yours yet, lady, you haven't bought it yet! It still belongs to the store, and I want to buy it! (I got that from George Carlin's book "Brain Droppings")]

54. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department.

55. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.

56. Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles.

57. In the makeup department, spray yourself with every perfume there is, then walk up to a boy who is with another girl and start flirting with him in that annoying, ditsy way. "hi!!!! (giggle) What's your sign?(giggle)." When the boy shows no interest, start hitting on the girl the exact same way. "hi!!!! (giggle) What's your sign?(giggle)." [also, ask if they are 'taken'!!!! ]

58. Hold indoor shopping cart races.

59. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.

60.When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially thin narrow aisles. [no one would notice, everyone does this anyway].

61.Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out.

62.Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.

63.Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.

64. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?"

65. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., "Do you have any Shnerples here?"

66. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you're taking it for a "test drive."

67. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.

68. Get boxes of ["protection"] and randomly put them in peoples carts when they don't realize it!

69. [this is one I made up but never actually did. I worked at Walmart while on winter vacation for Christmas money, seasonal job, and kept the name badge and blue vest. I always thought it would be fun to go to my local Walmart in the vest, or put it on in the bathroom. Then when people ask you where something is, scream at them and tell them to mind their own business, etc. Of course they will complain to the manager who has never heard of you, by which time you will be gone. This would actually work if you had the get-up, since Walmart is so big that no one actually knows everyone else. No one would recognize you, but they wouldn't think twice since there are so many employees. I never got the courage to do it, plus it would be mean. But it's fun to think about!]

~Mia~

 

[lajones81]

It's winter break time! Woot!

 

[Captain Brain]

WOOT!

No school for two weeks!Party!

 

[lajones81]

WOOT!

No school for two weeks!Party!

Woot! Now here is the ultimate question...who do you think is more excited: the teachers or the kids?

 

[Captain Brain]

Woot! Now here is the ultimate question...who do you think is more excited: the teachers or the kids?

I think i am.Yesterday I went up to people I had never met,and yelled"Merry Christmas!!"

 

[marypops!]

the other ultimate question who's more worried about this your mum or your dad?