My In-laws are worse than your In-laws!

[GirTheGecko]

So many awful stories here. Amazing how wretched some of the in-laws behaved towards everyone.

I'm so thankful my future in-laws are a good, fun bunch.

 

[okeydokey]

1.) DH for some reason invites DMIL to our DDs events, but she always makes excuses not to come or she says horrible things in front of DD. He asked if she wanted to come see DD in an American Girl fashion show, tickets were $30 and MIL said "that's ridiculous, I would rather us give DD $30 than sit at some stupid show" I will never invite her to anything. She didn't come to see DD in any swim meets and when she heard she won, she said "oh if I knew she was going to win I would have gone"
2) on the boardwalk at the beach the kids ask us if we can go in the candy store. She tells them she would buy them candy so we start walking and she goes into the dollar store and says they can only have candy from there.
3) the woman gambles so much they are going to name a casino after her.
4) my parents invited them to their big anniversary party. MIL was going around finding empty seats and drinking the glass of champagne that was at the empty places.
5) my kids hide their Halloween candy or Christmas stockings when the inlaws come over because they take their candy and make pigs of themselves.
6) I kid you not, if you eat Thanksgiving there, she cooks food and just puts the pot on the table!
7) everything she says starts with "Well, I....." her way or her thoughts are always right.
8) my DS fell outside and got all scraped up bleeding and she starts laughing "haha you fell"
9) this one really gets to me...we have major drama with my sil on my said of the family. So mil only met her a few times but we no longer speak to my brother or his wife. What my sil did is truly horrible. Whenever they come up in conversation my mil has to say "oh I think "sil" is such a nice person, she is so nice. I really like her!" my DH has told her numerous times never to comment on her and she doesn't listen!

I'm sorry, but this made me laugh.

 

[Robindianne]

1.)
4) my parents invited them to their big anniversary party. MIL was going around finding empty seats and drinking the glass of champagne that was at the empty places.

OMG My narcisistic mother did this at her sister's funeral! She tells us all (her 5 kids age 40 to 53) that we are all (and our spouses) alcoholics, but at my favorite aunt's funeral reception she kept asking my son (then 23) to get her so and so's drink sitting there. She is too crazy for words but I thought she was the only one that did that drink thing.

 

[AndreaDM]

I've got to see an excerpt of that 1965 s*x book!

 

[Erin1700]

OMG My narcisistic mother did this at her sister's funeral! She tells us all (her 5 kids age 40 to 53) that we are all (and our spouses) alcoholics, but at my favorite aunt's funeral reception she kept asking my son (then 23) to get her so and so's drink sitting there. She is too crazy for words but I thought she was the only one that did that drink thing.

Here is another drink thing...I don't drink unless it is a glass of wine at Christmas or something. I am really tiny so I don't hold alcohol well. So sometimes we go places that offer complimentary half glass of wine. I politely declined and asked for an iced tea. MIL flipped out yelling that I should have gotten it and given it to her. So the waitress comes back and MIL says she should fill my glass and she would drink it. The waitress said "No" and I did not say a word. MIL was so mad. Now she tries to coach me before we go to places like that and tells me "Get the free alcohol and later you can order your own drink" Um...NO!

Oh and we once got a bottle of wine and it was in our fridge. MIL saw it and asked to taste it. Within 20 minutes the bottle was gone! When my DH noticed she said "oh it just goes down so easy!"

 

[Erin1700]

I'm sorry, but this made me laugh.

I have a panic attack just wondering what she must have done at our wedding. I stayed away from her.

 

[mrodgers]

Not inlaws, they are awesome.

These stories make my mother telling my pregnant wife, "you look pregnant, your face is getting fat...." seem like something normal to say to a pregnant woman.

 

[SLK1]

Haven't read the whole thread but wanted to share....for our first wedding anniversary, my MIL bought us tickets to see Phantom of the Opera. She bought THREE tickets! And they weren't together, so DH felt guilty leaving her to watch alone so I sat with her and HE sat alone!!!!

I must also say, MIL passed away on Christmas Day 2007 and I miss her tremendously every day. She wasn't one of those who thought her son could do no wrong...quite the opposite!! She always took my side and we were always able to have fun together.

 

[hereyago]

You are a better person then me. I hope you are blessed with all the Karma that you have earned.

Nope, no way better, My DF asked me on his death bed with us both knowing he would die that day, and we both didn't think she would live this long(in no way trying to be mean) but sometimes you think 1 spouse would go before the other one type thing. I am quite sure he is somewhere around me going OOPS!

In fact, I am always telling people not to do what I have done, being a "caregiver" isn't easy but when the person you are caring for is ummm. difficult, it can be like being in pergatory at times. And I hate when people go: oh, you should do it because it shows your kids a good example by turning the other cheek sometimes taking the high road is way over rated.

 

[HelenePA]

We had a major falling out with my inlaws, mostly mil, when my ds6 was 1yr old... when my dad was still alive he use to tell me "let it go". So I thought inviting them to my dad's "going away dinner" (no funeral he donated his body to science) was the best way to "let it go" they swore up and down they'd be there. they couldn't wait to see the kids blah blah blah, by then it had been almost 2 years since they saw them and I was 22wks preg with ds#2. (they didn't know I was preg again until I was about 18wks and only found out by accident... after she told me she was glad I had a MC we found no reason to let them in on having another grandchild) It was pretty much an all day event at a local hall food, drink, bounce house, it was a GREAT time. So by 3pm the kids were tired. Dh took them home for awhile to relax he came back at 5pm with them telling me his parents emailed him to let us know they wouldn't be there after all... my fil's sister (who lives in the same town) stopped by and they were going to spend the day with her instead... Since then contact has been little to none.. They were great grandparents to my first dd.. then my sil had a lil boy... since then our kids have been on the back burner.. my mil use to tell me "you'll understand when your kids have kids". Meaning I"ll love my girls kids but not my sons I guess.. I told her in a email she was a great example on how not to be a grandparent and I'll love all my grandchildren equally... I will have a party when she dies.. yes I just said that... his dad has been beaten down so much he can't have a say in anything... I like him.. she is the devil, she'll live forever.ETA they still have never met the "baby" who'll be 3 Oct 2nd... and if I have the final say in it they never will

 

[Breezy_Carol]

Sometimes my ILs irritate me...but...WOW. This is amazing and sad all at the same time! I will never understand what posesses people to be so incredibly cruel to others.

That being said, this is also the MOST entertaining thread I've seen so far! I hope you are all getting a little therapy by sharing your stories!! You deserve it!

I really am shocked at these stories, and so sad for everyone too. I have a wonderful MIL and I adored my DFIL who passed away 7 years ago. I've read every post and my heart really goes out to all of you who have suffered at the hands of your in-laws. And I'm especially sorry that any child has had to endure such favoritism, neglect and downright abuse from someone who should have been nothing but loving and kind to them. To those of you who are still dealing with this problem, I wish you well. I truly hope sharing has been a healing experience.

Well said. DMIL has given us a few wacky gifts but, over all, I couldn't ask for a better MIL

 

[HannaBelle]

MiL's loving their daughters children more than their son's children seems to be a reoccurring theme on this thread. I know it is an issue between myself and my MIL. WTH is that all about?

My MIL did not come to the hospital when either of my kids were born, but she was at the birth of all of the others. Distance was no issue...it is just bizarre. That was just the beginning of a lifetime of small slights, nothing like what others have posted, but my kids have still noticed.

 

[Andtototoo]

I could write a book on my ILs, particularly my MIL who was the instigator of all evil in my life, but I'm not going to. Suffice to say that my MIL truly was a sociopath in sneakers and when she died, my reaction was I actually don't waste my time hating them, however -- they are dead to me. Just made life much easier when she was actually dead.

I have NO idea why my dh turned out like a decent human being because he sure wasn't modeled that behavior at home.

 

[Sal]

The woman who "should" have been my mother in law died after giving birth to her fifth child. Her oldest two were in Jr High at the time of her death. She was a wonderful woman and lived for her children. Her sisters (DH's aunts) tell us often how she would have loved our daughters and grandchildren. As you might imagine, her death was devastating for the family.

A few months later, a newly graduated girl became a live in nanny. My future FIL was totally overwhelmed with five kids and the live in nany seemed to be a pefect solution. I bet you can see where this is going!

He married the nanny a little over one year later. StepMIL made it her mission to erase all memories of the children's mother. (too painful) To make a LONG story short, she made life miserable for the older children. DH and BIL#1 were left with relatives when the family moved (they were in High School and didn't want to move). SIL#1 was allowed to get married at age 15. Little by little, StepMIL managed to tear the family apart.

DH and I have been together since high school. We used to visit FIL, but they never came to see him. We went to visit once, only to be told that they no longer lived there!

Years passed as we married and had beautiful daughters and grandchildren. We would pay an occasional visit, but were never invited for holidays with the rest of the family. My DD#1 was diagnosed with incasive breast cancer at age 25 and still no contact from FIL. We figure it is his loss that he has no relationship with his grandchildren.

FIL was diagnosed with cancer and was successfully treated for a few years.
In July, his condition became grave. DH went to his home to offer any help he could give and visited in the hospital. FIL died on July 27. On July 28, we learn of his death......

ON FACEBOOK!!!

He was cremated following a family vieiwng that we were not invited to attend (or knew about). There were no other services. To this day, StepMIL has never contacted us to tell us of his passing. She lives 20 minutes from us.

I have two awesome SIL's and I sure hope they never have any of these stories to tell about me!!

Sal

 

[ABtwinmommy]

I have read through the whole thread and its been great therapy for me. It is unbelievable how horrible and how nuts some people can be. I thought I had it bad but even my ILs can't live up to some of the evil doing I have read...

I could go on and on about my MIL's odd and cruel behavior but I'll just post a few highlights.

The day after DH proposed to me she pulled him aside and asked him if he was sure he really wanted to do this, because she didn't feel that I spent enough time with HER or talked to HER enough. Now, I was pregnant with our twins at the time, mind you, and I was on partial bedrest...and I was seeing and speaking with MIL DAILY.

When my parents were in town (they live 6 hrs away) and meeting ILs for the first time ILs asked if my parents would like to go to breakfast the following morning. So we all met at ILs in the morning, DH (DBF at the time) and I rode with my parents as they were unfamiliar with the area, ILs were following in their vehicle. About a mile down the road they turned off and called my DH saying they are not coming. To this day we do not know what DMIL s temper tantrum was about that time. They proceeded to be rude and avoid my parents for the remainder of the visit, for truly no reason.

Most recently they failed to aknowledge our kids' (their only grandkids, as DH is an only child) 2nd birthday. They live only 20 mins away (ya know, in Crazy Town). Granted this was just a couple of weeks after a big blowout fight with MIL, after she chased me out of her house screaming at me and assaulting me with a soup can, in front of the other people she had at her house, all because I very politely asked to see the label of the can of soup she was planning to feed my children. This is none of the kids fault though, you'd think she would still want to do SOMETHING for their bday, seeing as how she has "waited her whole life for these grandkids."

We are currently not on speaking terms. Luckily DH is nothing like his mother and realizes what a nutcase she is. Oh and the best part btw, she completely denies that she has ever done any of these things.

 

[GettingFuzzy]

It's strangely comforting to know there is a whole boatload of crazy MIL's out there.

I wish I had known my DH was the "golden son" beforehand. Could have saved myself a whole heap of stress. I was dead in the water before I made it through the door... Mostly I'm just indifferent to the woman now. Less stress for me and just annoys her to no end she can't get a rise out of me.

The highlights-

*The first time I met her, she went into my suitcase while we were out and washed and folded my clothes. Then told everyone I made her do it. Like commanded her. I was just embarassed she was all up in my underpants.

*I noticed some socks had been disappearing on me. Okay, I lose socks all the time. Big whoop. On a visit later, I found a pile of my socks. Just one of each (different designs). Why? Just, seriously, why?

*She started stealing my hair bands. Okay. All dark brown or black. So I got some bright colored ones and started replacing them one at a time. Oh the looks I got. I mean, what was she going to say? Stop replacing the hair bands I stole for different ones? Of course not.

*We stayed with them a couple LONG months when my DH was medically retired from the Army, and I came home to find all my black clothes soaking in hot water in the washer.

*This one is fairly creepy and just causes us to keep our distance. She copies me. On everything. My nails grow naturally square, so she files her square now. If I buy something, she buys it within a week. I have reddish hair, so she dyed hers. Only she used really old dye and it came out BRIGHT orange. Best. Day. Ever. DH thinks it's creepy, so do I, so we just avoid her when we can.

*And the one that broke us- She not only steals jewelry (I usually find it), she stole my engagement ring. And had it for 2 months, watched me mope around and even let DH replace it, then one day he was over there, and saw it, just sitting there. I don't know what she said, I'm sure it was just BS, but ever since then, I just ignore her unless forced into contact.

Honestly, if my FIL wasn't so sick and we weren't concerned with his care, we would leave and be happy to never talk to her again. But she's an alcoholic and a mean one at that, so we don't trust her to take proper care of FIL. Once he goes though, so do we.

 

[HelenePA]

MiL's loving their daughters children more than their son's children seems to be a reoccurring theme on this thread. I know it is an issue between myself and my MIL. WTH is that all about?

My MIL did not come to the hospital when either of my kids were born, but she was at the birth of all of the others. Distance was no issue...it is just bizarre. That was just the beginning of a lifetime of small slights, nothing like what others have posted, but my kids have still noticed.

I honestly think she hates my dh because she was 17 and in HS when she had him he had colic for the first 6 months of his life to boot .. I dont know if it was a shotgun wedding but I do know she was preg in her wedding pics... I love my sons I tell them all the time I will still love them when they are grown and I will love their kids as well... of course my ds6 looks at me like I have 2 heads when I say this but its true! my MIL was at my house to drop something off the day I was bringing my ds#2 HOME from the hospital my brother told her she was welcome to come in to wait (which I could have killed him for saying but I wasn't here) she never came in to see the others she handed him a paper thru the door and he said she sped out of here like a bat in hell... nice huh? she wanted to get as far away from us as possible I guess

 

[Erin1700]

I forgot this one...we never told anyone what we were going to name our son until he was born. Just DH, DDthen 6 yrs old and I knew and it was nice to share this "secret" with my DD. When inlaws came to the hospital when he was born, we told him we named him Andrew but would call him Andy. Can you believe MIL stood there and said "No I want him called Drew." She kept saying it over and over. Here I was half out of it from the csection, hormonal and exhausted and she had to keep it up. I was almost in tears. And my little DD kept saying "That is not his name! He is Andy!"
From across the room MIL just smirked at me and I swear I almost cursed her out.

Oh and she has this dog that is outside most of the time in a big cage and when she comes over here she will pick up one of my kids toys and say she is taking it for the dog. She does it to make them cry.

Her birthday is coming up next week. That means I have to see her. Ugh!

 

[metalis4ever]

My actual Mother-In Law passed away from medical complications at the age of 43 in October 2007. As you can imagine my DW was devastated and was hit very hard by it. Well her Mother always had Christmas Eve dinner for her and her Brothers and her Father even though they were Divorced still came to Xmas Eve dinner to celebrate as a family. As you can imagine my DW's Step-Mother was never a fan of that. So we were over my Step Mother-In Law's and Father In-Law's for Thanksgiving Dinner and my Wife said that she wanted to carry on the tradition and my Step MIL cut in and said "I figured since your Mother is dead it was my turn". My wife sat stunned as I said "are you serious?" My Step MIL then said "You know my Mother is dead too, she needs to get over it and MY husband is spending Christmas Eve with me". I got my DW up and we left as my FIL sat there and did and said nothing.

I haven't respected my FIL since and I have no use for my Step Mother In-Law.

 

[Disneymadhouse]

Well, mine is not a horror atory about in laws like some I have read, but anyway here goes!

DH has one half brother and one half sister. The sister was our bridesmaid when we got married. Nearly 2 years ago, the brother comes round to tell us that he has something important to tell us. The sister has decided (age 16) that she has gender dismorphia and has decided that she wants to be male, and want to now be known by a male name. OK, so we are supportive and go along with this. I did wonder how I would answer DD when she asked "who is that bridesmaid... she looks a bit like uncle....", but thought it'll work out. The "sister" has now been known as male for around 18months.
Then last Sept DH's mum and stepdad split up (he is the dad of the "sister"). I never really liked him, but what irked me was that MIL had insisted that her DH should be called Grandad when we had DD. We refused and after a few discussions he was to be called Pappy. Then at a family party she had a go at DH saying it seems that we didn't want Pappy in DD's life, so we made more effort to see them.(They only live 4 miles away and MIL has never attempted to come and see DD unless formally invited)
Anyway, after the break up MIL started mentioning her "friend" Andrea quite a bit, and I said to DH, I think she is having a relationship with A. Eventually in Feb this year MIL admitted to DH that yes she is now a lesbian and its a very serious relationship with A, (MIL has been married 3 times, has 3 kids by 3 different fathers and is a catholic).
Now I don't consider myself a prude, but I just feel that I will have sooo much to explain to DD. The "sister" will eventually have a sex change and will have relations with men as she/ he doesn't like the female body at all. And Nanny(MIL) will be in a relationship with a woman.
Some of my friends don't believe that this could all be in one family!!

Just thought I'd share. Yes I'm a bit freaked out by it all. My parents have been happily married for over 40 years!!!

Claire