Moving away from kids...

[Gumbo4x4]

Grow a pair and dedicate yourself to becoming a real husband and father. If you fail, you fail. At least you and your wife will have closure.

 

[Granny square]

No finance or acccounting jobs in Chicago?

Hahahahahaha!

 

[aaarcher86]

I actually disagree. I don't think the OP will regret anything. It doesn't sound like his kids are a priority in any capacity, so no regret.

 

[Granny square]

I actually disagree. I don't think the OP will regret anything. It doesn't sound like his kids are a priority in any capacity, so no regret.

Eh, my dad learned later in life that he made huge mistakes and spent years in overdrive to make relationships. He lives with the sorrow of what he threw away.

 

[sunshinehighway]

You're about to make the biggest mistake of your life. Divorce is hard. There's always a period of transition. When my ex and I split up the kids and I slept on the floor at my parents house for 6 months while I got us on our feet. You think the easy solution is to leave. Maybe it is but it's the decision you will regret for the rest of your life.

I actually wonder if guys like this do ever regret it. I mean he's set himself up as so self sacrificing. None of this is his fault (in his mind). I have to wonder if he would ever realize the damage that will be done to the kids is his fault. My guess is he will get a victim mentality and blame the ex for turning the kids against him and their problems from his leaving on her parenting skills.

 

[goofyintoronto]

Apparently not?

No finance or acccounting jobs in Chicago?

OP, you know what you want to do. You pretty much made up your mind. Not one person on this thread agreed with you (a couple have, but in case you didnt catch it, they were being sarcastic).

Sounds like you need some time off to think things thru, rationally if possible.

If you do end up moving to texas, dont cry and start kicking yourself if your relationship with your kids turn sour.

 

[sunnyday123]

And maybe I need to mention the other part of the equation...

My friend that I can live with in Dallas is a college girlfriend that I have remained friends with for 20 years... The last 2-3 years she has been a great help as I worked thru my problems, went down to visit her and there was a huge spark still there..

And here, ladies and gentelmen, is the REAL reason he wants to leave his kids.

And the last 2-3 years shes been "helping" you with your problems?? While you're still married. What a pal, helping you cheat and all. You've obviously made up your mind as to what you're going to do, and people here are giving you actual, heartfelt advice. Which you're going to chose to ignore.

Mommy is suffocating you? Wah, wah, wah. Grow up and get a job, or three. Whatever it takes, you do it for your kids, they didn't have anything to do with this, yet they're going to take the short end of the stick. Think about them and how this will affect them, instead of focusing on yourself. Stop being selfish.

 

[etoiles]

I had a roommate in college that was completely devastated when her father left her family for a new woman and the new woman's child in another state. She was extremely hurt by this and was very angry to learn that her father would be spending Christmas with kids other than her and her brother. her younger brother also refused to visit his father in that state since he was so hurt.

However, it sounds like your mind is made up and you have already decided to spend the holidays with your new family. Please know your children will be in tears over this.

Flying into Dallas late Dec 6, staying down for about 4 weeks.. Thinking about renting a car for just one day at the airport so my friend doesn't have to be out late, we would return it the next day.. So when I show them my return flight confirmation and it shows Jan 6, will they allow me to use a debit card??

Into Love... Want to make this a total surprise, won't know I am in town until I knock on the door.. About $30 to rent a car and return it (from north of Denton)... Could take the train and then a cab... Or a shuttle service...

It sounds like this has been going on a while and your children will remember this.

Just bought a ticket for a quick trip I am doing to Dallas, paid for the ticket with my wife's debit card by accident...

 

[Wishing on a star]

Is this even for real....
I won't even go past the post where the OP admits that he is male... Is living with his mommie, and while bailing on his wife and kids, USES his wife (with his kids as his big 'excuse') to also escape from and deal with his mommie. I can't just won't bother to read another word of this thread past those two posts.

So, he can't deal with anything...
He has to have both his wife and his wifey-mommie supporting him both financially and emotionally, in every way.

This has got to be one of the most lame and disgusting things that I have seen here on the DIS in a long, long, long, time. If not ever...

If this is a bunch of troll crap, I would actually be glad to know that.

If any of this is for real, at all, OP... yep, move away, run, run, run. In all total and complete honesty, if I were your wife, or your mother, at this point, I would be packing your bags and and changing my locks.

 

[goofyintoronto]

I had a roommate in college that was completely devastated when her father left her family for a new woman and the new woman's child in another state. She was extremely hurt by this and was very angry to learn that her father would be spending Christmas with kids other than her and her brother. her younger brother also refused to visit his father in that state since he was so hurt.

However, it sounds like your mind is made up and you have already decided to spend the holidays with your new family. Please know your children will be in tears over this.





It sounds like this has been going on a while and your children will remember this.

Wow, good work detective!

OP, good luck with the new woman. She really knows how to pick 'em!

 

[mnrose]

OMG. It keeps getting better. The new girlfriend doesn't even know he's COMING?!?! Gurreat. This is going to work out so well. So, so well.

I see no problems at all.


This has to be a put on. Please come back and say "jokes all on you". It is a joke, right? Right?

 

[RitaE]

Somehow I'm thinking that "I moved out of the house with only my clothes so she can support our children" probably looks a lot more like "She kicked my butt to the curb after finding out I've been having an affair."

And "My Mother made it clear she doesn't want me here."

probably looks much more like "My Mother found out about my behavior and is disgusted."

ditto for the friends. You are seriously surprised that nobody has volunteered to take you in?

 

[mrsklamc]

Oh and OP you said none of your friends have offered to let you live with them- that's because most men would find that humiliating. They aren't going to offer that unless you ask. YOU need to be taking the initiative to find another place to live (in Chicago, not Texas) instead of waiting around for one to be offered up to you.

 

[mom2AidanAndEli]

You know what? I've completely changed my mind on this one! Yes, move now. Go. Get out. Leave. Jump on the next flight. It will truly be best for all concerned. Hopefully, the ex-wife has met a MAN who can be a father to her children.

If you stay, I'm sure you'll make it clear to your children everything that you've given up for them. I mean a steady girl and her kids, free living--that's a lot to give up and sacrifice. Poor you.

They'll be hurt---really bad---for a while. But they'll move on while "daddy" is busy with his new life, new kids, new freeloading. They'll probably stay angry at you, but you won't be around to see it anyway, so what does that matter? At least with you out of the picture, they'll have a shot at seeing healthy role models.

See? Now we're starting to get the split opinions that are typical for a DIS board!

 

[mnrose]

Somehow I'm thinking that "I moved out of the house with only my clothes so she can support our children" probably looks a lot more like "She kicked my butt to the curb after finding out I've been having an affair."

And "My Mother made it clear she doesn't want me here."

probably looks much more like "My Mother found out about my behavior and is disgusted."

ditto for the friends. You are seriously surprised that nobody has volunteered to take you in?

Ding Ding Ding. We have a winner!

 

[mrsklamc]

Wait if she doesn't know he's coming how is she footing the bill for this?

 

[dsneprincess]

I had a roommate in college that was completely devastated when her father left her family for a new woman and the new woman's child in another state. She was extremely hurt by this and was very angry to learn that her father would be spending Christmas with kids other than her and her brother. her younger brother also refused to visit his father in that state since he was so hurt.

However, it sounds like your mind is made up and you have already decided to spend the holidays with your new family. Please know your children will be in tears over this.

It sounds like this has been going on a while and your children will remember this.

I think you missed the post about 50+ southwest flights this year also on another board. Something was *sparking* (no pun intended) a memory for me and you found it. I think we all see what is reality here, including the soon to be ex. OP wants us to think something else entirely because it is, or at least should be, all about him!

 

[Lynne M]

edited: Never mind, I just saw the links to OP's other posts.

 

[dsneprincess]

Wait if she doesn't know he's coming how is she footing the bill for this?

I don't know; story keeps changing. First he was paying in November, then he used his wife's debit card by mistake and new honey was paying December. Now new honey doesn't know he's coming....... Really, really praying for a troll!!

 

[NFLDERS]

Wow. Just wow. Do you really think this makes what you are considering more acceptable, rather than less? You are considering leaving your children so you can be with a woman?!? You really think they are going to forgive you for that?!?

Changes everything! Wow!!