Kids and Christmas lists, ever NOT get the items?

[QVCshopper]

Sounds like you grew up as a Jehova's Witness.

If you look into it more you will find that Christmas is not actually Jesus's birthday and that Christmas was not actually a Christian holiday to begin with. Somewhere over time it has become the day that Christians have chosen to celebrate the birth of Jesus.

Here is an interesting link talking about why that date was chosen: http://www.religioustolerance.org/xmas_sel.htm

Nope, not Jehovah's Witness; just a very strange, almost defunct religious group that has splintered and broken apart over the years due to some extreme beliefs... Anyway, thanks for the info.; I knew all of that, but I was just trying to say that Christmas is about family and memories to me. That is all!

 

[mrsbornkuntry]

Sounds like I do this differently than most. It's pretty common in my family so I thought others did it too. My kids afre not allowed to give me a list. I don't want one. For us the fun of gifts is to think of something others would like. We chat sometimes about what people would like but it's not like they give me a shoppoing list. I don't like the connotation that it's an expectation. THey DO make a list for Grandma because she would be lost without it. And I give a few suggestions to the sister's in law.

I do lists with my kids as I posted earlier, but we have a secret Santa where the kids draw each other's names, but they aren't allowed to tell who they got so that person doesn't tell them what they want for this same reason, I want them to really think about the person they're shopping for. It has worked out really well and the kids have gotten really good at it. I think it's been a good lesson in really paying attention to others. I've noticed that my children have gotten to be pretty good at picking out gifts for their friends as well.

 

[ratlenhum]

My son just turned 9 and this is the first year he's ever made a list. He has autism and I think this is the first year he "gets" Santa and the list thing, if not then it's definitely the first year he can express that he understands.

So needless to say, yes, my son will get everything on his list, and then some, and anything he asks for between now and then. He has 9 years of Christmas lists to make up for!

 

[tink576]

Don't forget the Reindeer food outside when you put the cookies out for Santa!! (Dry Oats mixed with red/green glitter).

I remember the first year my brother and sister put out Reindeer food, one of the kids in their class made it for all of them. Their excitement was priceless and the yard was covered in Reindeer prints...(for one day a year those pesky deer in the yard were actually useful )

 

[Aliceacc]

We have never tied Christmas into being good or bad. That's right, no "Santa's watching" types of comments.

My kids, like most kids, are basically good most of the time. Sure, it gets a little crazy around Christmas time. So parents (and teachers and babysitters and everyone else) need a little more patience.

But I could never understand translating that excitement into a threat that you won't get the stuff you want.

That said, my kids have always understood that their lists were "suggestions" for Santa. Like any gifts, the giver gives you what he or she thinks you'll like. (That's part of the reason I hate bridal and baby registries, but that's a different topic.)

The stuff you WANT, you save up for. The gifts you get, you appreciate.

My daughter was saying the other day that some of the Christmas gifts she's loved the most have been the ones she didn't ask for.

Of the BIG gifts this year, I'm most excited about the Kinect we're giving our son and the Kindle my husband is getting. Both should be total surprises. (The girls asked for, and are getting, an American Girl doll. Though my younger daughter asked for another Bitty baby, and is getting Molly.)

Christmas is NOT about placing orders and having Santa fill them; he's not the UPS guy.

Oh, and all 3 of my kids (and most of my students-- I teach high school) DID write out lists. I'm bringing them to Macys today for their Make a Wish promo. (Macys will donate $1 a letter to the Make a Wish Foundation.) I promised my students that I wouldn't read their lists, but I can only imagine what some of them said

 

[luv2mickey]

My kids were only allowed to ask for one gift from Santa, it forced them to really consider what they wanted. I could not stand to see them become greedy. They were told that Santa would decide what other gifts he would bring. Parents know what kids want they don't have to make a list. My kids are now teenagers and its just hard in this society to teach them to appreciate things, even if you don't give them everything thing, they want for nothing. when kids are little they are so sweet and you don't want to see them disappointed but you will regret it later if you don't teach them now they can't have everything they want.

 

[polkadotsuitcase]

My kids, like most kids, are basically good most of the time. Sure, it gets a little crazy around Christmas time. So parents (and teachers and babysitters and everyone else) need a little more patience.

Thanks for saying this! I think most kids really are great little people, and try hard.

Christmas is NOT about placing orders and having Santa fill them; he's not the UPS guy.

As our kids have gotten older, the presents have gotten pricier, so they receive a small number of gifts. We've also become more seasoned parents, and realized our own kids don't "need" a bazillion gifts! That said, I do have the kids write out a list for my inlaws. They'll pick a couple off the list, but they certainly don't buy it all! Hubby and I already have an idea of what we're getting the kids, so we don't ask for a list.

 

[Alexander]

We always get everything our kids want.

Regarding the iTouch....Personally, I think 8 is too young for one. DS has one and he didn't get it until he was 11. I still cringe at how he takes care of it. They are pretty fragile. One drop and they're pretty much done for. Maybe you could get a Nano or some other iPod and include a note that Santa thinks you need to be X years old before he'll bring the iTouch.

 

[pklein09]

My kids have pretty much only asked Santa for one gift. Yes, one gift. So, how do you NOT get that one gift? Well, I've been luck there, too. One year, it was a Glam and Jam Barbie for DD 14. DS10 has asked Santa for rubber bands - two years in a row!!! Four years later, and he still loves rubber bands. He keeps them in a shoe box! This year, DS10 and DD12have asked for iPads. Really? So, we've gotten each of them "I" pads - small note pads with the initial "I" on top of it, like a monogram. They never said it had to be an Apple brand, fully functional ipad.... Yes, some of you will think that's mean, but we are a household full of puns, so this will go over well, and DS10 will "get it." I also know he will be very specific next time he asks for something.

 

[pklein09]

My son just turned 9 and this is the first year he's ever made a list. He has autism and I think this is the first year he "gets" Santa and the list thing, if not then it's definitely the first year he can express that he understands.

So needless to say, yes, my son will get everything on his list, and then some, and anything he asks for between now and then. He has 9 years of Christmas lists to make up for!

Have a wonderful Christmas!!! DD14 was classified at age 4 as multiply disabled - nothing specific, which was frustrating. When she asked for the "Glam and Jam Barbie," she was 8. I HAD to find that doll - it was the first thing she had ever asked for. My problem - she called it a "Jam and Jam Barbie" and I didn't know the actual name. I finally found it on Dec. 23. Talk about sweating that one.

 

[gillenkl]

I asked my kids to tell me about 5 things they really want and then I get what we can. By no means do I get everything they want.

 

[neatokimmo]

That's awesome - enjoy your holiday

My son just turned 9 and this is the first year he's ever made a list. He has autism and I think this is the first year he "gets" Santa and the list thing, if not then it's definitely the first year he can express that he understands.

So needless to say, yes, my son will get everything on his list, and then some, and anything he asks for between now and then. He has 9 years of Christmas lists to make up for!

 

[onescgirl]

I do not buy everything on our kids list for different reasons: price, against my judgement for our family, & not wanting kids to get everything they see.

It's hard for me not to overbuy & get them everything, but I try not to.
I feel that can cause financial problems for them when they're older if they are used to getting everything they see/want.

Some things on DS (10) & DD (10) list they are not getting:
Laptop for each: We already have a computer they can use. I still do not see the need for a child to have their own. I definitely do NOT want them to have unsupervised internet access. Even if ''my kids would never look up anything bad'', you never know what sites bad images/things just show up on.
TV for room: I had to tell them they would never have a t.v. in their room. I don't believe in it. They do have a playroom with a t.v. in it, so they are not totally disprivileged.
Cell phone: I'm just not ready for that yet. I do want to get a 'extra' phone for our family to give them when they're at ball practice, spending the night away, etc.... But, I'm not ready for them to have their own phone glued to them 24/7. Does that make sense?

The two big gifts they will get are: trampoline & bikes (neither are on list) but I'm sure they'll be excited about it.
They will be getting DVD's & Wii/PS3 games that are on their list & other misc items.

We do emphasize #1 that Jesus is the reason we celebrate Christmas & not just getting gifts.

Does your child have parents that love him, food on the table and clothes to wear? If so, he is well ahead of most of the kids in this world, so I would say you are not bad parents. Perspective has taught me that the fact that there are ANY presents to be opened Christmas morning is way more than most kids can hope for!

My kids' Christmas lists are "Wish Lists", not "Get Lists".

Oh, I need to tell this to my kids today!

Actually I feel the opposite. I think you are a good parent for NOT getting everything on the list.

Kids need to learn that they can't have everything they want.

and Santa has become a cute thing Mom loves.

Love it!

Then there was the year I wanted a little TV for my room on Christmas eve mom put all the gifts under the tree an there was a box that said RCA 12 in" TV (we was not allowed to get down an read name tags or touch the gifts etc they was just to look at.) I looked at that TV box all night just knowing it was my TV I so badly wanted.

NO my brothers boots was in that box what happened to my TV I have no idea it never showed up anywhere in the house.

Oh, that happened to me one year when I was little. Our family recycled boxes to wrap gifts in too. One year I was so excited about the picture of the toy that was on the box thinking that was my gift, but opened it to find clothes!

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

Growing up I stopped making lists because Santa never bought off it anyway! My mother is the WORST gift giver. I would get underwear and socks from "santa" every year. I always wondered why my friends got cool gifts and i got well not so cool.

when we had our first DD my DH was shocked at how little I did for her for Christmas! She was only 6 months so I got her a book and a couple toys. Fast forward a few years and we would discuss gifts. I also was because he is normally very grumpy but insisted the kids have good Christmas' now to me we go BIG but to everyone else we are still budget related. I still scour for deals. I buy and DH always says "do more"! I could not believe the first year he sent me for DS Lites for BOTH kids. since then we kept up. DD is 10 and DS is 8.

However we don't buy everything on the lists. This year for DS we are buying very LITTLE on his list and I feel heartbroken. He is an excellent child, does well in school, excels in sports, does chores and is such a sweet child. His major requests for Santa are an iPod Touch or a PSP in blue.

Now, he has a DSi. We have a wii and DH has a PSP he bought for son but said it was DH's so DS didn't take it to daycare. We also have a PS3. DS has an iPod shuffle and an MP3 player (no screen or touch or video). We are getting them one netbook to share.

DH said "NO" on the iPod touch. His reasoning is DS has all the other electronics and does not need the touch. He said he would think about a nano but no on the touch. He said no way on another PSP. Thing is, I agree. But I feel so bad because DS has his little heart set on a iPod touch. I told him this morning I doubted Santa would bring the iPod or the PSP because he has one. He teared up a bit and said "but mom, I'm a good boy".

So are we bad parents or do you also not buy things on their lists??

He is getting Harry Potter hogwarts lego castle as his big gift, along with the netbook to be shared. He is getting several other smaller things too.

I just want to hear from others that do not buy up the whole wish list.

I have a blue PSP, the Madden version, that my son hadto have 2 Christmas's ago. Since he got his Ipod Touch last year, he never even looks at the PSP. I read this post and thought to myself, shoot I can sell it to Jeepgirl.

Now that DS is older (12) he gets mainly everything on his list, only because he doesn't ask for much. Well he wanted an Ipad but isn't getting one of those. But its mostly gift cards and a cell phone.

DD just wanted American girl stuff.

When DS was about 8, he wanted this Star Wars thing. An AT AT, looks like a big electronic dog. Well it was nowhere to be found. I ended up buying it on ebay for about almost twice as what it would cost in the store. He played with it about 2 times. Never again.

They get most things but there are years they don't get everything.

 

[MickeyMomOfThree]

I admit, I haven't read all the pages, but for us, the letter to Santa is just suggestions for Santa. They never get everything off the list. We have only told tem give Santa lots of ideas so he has an idea of what you might like.

 

[mrsbornkuntry]

We have never tied Christmas into being good or bad. That's right, no "Santa's watching" types of comments.

My kids, like most kids, are basically good most of the time. Sure, it gets a little crazy around Christmas time. So parents (and teachers and babysitters and everyone else) need a little more patience.

But I could never understand translating that excitement into a threat that you won't get the stuff you want.

That said, my kids have always understood that their lists were "suggestions" for Santa. Like any gifts, the giver gives you what he or she thinks you'll like. (That's part of the reason I hate bridal and baby registries, but that's a different topic.)

The stuff you WANT, you save up for. The gifts you get, you appreciate.

My daughter was saying the other day that some of the Christmas gifts she's loved the most have been the ones she didn't ask for.

Of the BIG gifts this year, I'm most excited about the Kinect we're giving our son and the Kindle my husband is getting. Both should be total surprises. (The girls asked for, and are getting, an American Girl doll. Though my younger daughter asked for another Bitty baby, and is getting Molly.)

Christmas is NOT about placing orders and having Santa fill them; he's not the UPS guy.

Oh, and all 3 of my kids (and most of my students-- I teach high school) DID write out lists. I'm bringing them to Macys today for their Make a Wish promo. (Macys will donate $1 a letter to the Make a Wish Foundation.) I promised my students that I wouldn't read their lists, but I can only imagine what some of them said

I'm not sure what the date is, but one one day Macy's is going to donate $2 instead of just $1, they're calling it "Believe". I heard about it on The View yesterday so it might be on their website or Macy's.

 

[Halbleib1]

Nope, not Jehovah's Witness; just a very strange, almost defunct religious group that has splintered and broken apart over the years due to some extreme beliefs... Anyway, thanks for the info.; I knew all of that, but I was just trying to say that Christmas is about family and memories to me. That is all!

I agree that is a big part of what Christmas is about for us as well as the acknowlegment of Jesus.

 

[mamaLori05]

It's hard for me not to overbuy & get them everything, but I try not to.
I feel that can cause financial problems for them when they're older if they are used to getting everything they see/want.

This is sooooo true!! I have 2 friends that got EVERYTHING they ever asked for for xmas as kids, as well as pretty spoiled throughout the year. Fast forward several years to now and guess what, both of those friends are in financial problems. They were so used to getting what they wanted when they wanted it that they just bought everything on credit, racked up the bills, and have/had severe financial problems. One racked up her bills so high that her and her husband couldn't even afford to rent an appt. They had to move in with her parents, who thought they were helping by taking out a second mortgage on their house to pay off their dd's and dsil's bills. Needless to say that lesson wasn't learned and they are now heading in that same direction again, only this time with kids involved.
Second friend similar situation growing up. Her and her husband own a house, and are teetering on having to go into forclosure. Not because either one of them lost a job, but again because they racked up their cc bills so high (and maxed out several of them) they now dont have the money to pay their mortgage. They are desperately needing to purchase another car to replace one of their current cars, but can't get a loan because their credit is so poor. She is now driving her dad's car, leaving her dad without a car (and no, they don't live together. They live in the next town over and her mom and dad are having to carpool to and from work so that their daughter can have his car.) Instead of working at paying off their debt or saving to buy a car so they can give back the one they are "borrowing", they somehow came across a little extra money and went out and bought a $1000 flat screen tv because "they really liked it and wanted it."
The rest of my friends that didn't always get everything they wanted and were expected to help pay for bills they created (insurance or car payment when they got their license/bought a car, pay for their own cell phones, etc...) are all financially stable. I guess for me I'd rather have my kids learn early that they can't have everything they want all the time, then lead them down a path that will most likely lead them into financial troubles later in life.

 

[charming23]

Growing up I never got everything on my list and that was okay with me. I always figured it was a "wish" list anyways. I also never remember asking for large ticket items like electronics, expect one year I did ask for a cd player and my mom was so proud she got the $75 model I liked for $25 on clearance. I knew we were not rich and I would rather have had a few more presents to open than one large/expensive item.

Although they did surprise me a few times over the years. Like when I got a second American Girl doll or a laptop.

 

[Suz D]

When we ask our daughters what they want for Christmas they usually give just one item. We try very hard to get that item and then fill in with other things that we think they'll like. Our oldest DD believed in Santa until she was 10 (I know, it's on the old side, but she's just that kind of kid. As a matter of fact, we went to WDW when she was 9 and ate at Chef Mickey's. After Mickey came to our table she looked very distressed. I pulled her aside to find out what was wrong. She was nearly ready to cry and said, "When I hugged Mickey...I think there was a PERSON inside". Okay, seriously, I figured by that time she knew he wasn't the real MM. The next morning we went to breakfast with Pooh and she pulled ME aside after Pooh came by. "Mom, I hugged Pooh, and I KNOW there wasn't a person in THERE". But I digress...)

The same year as the MM incident, all she wanted was a red transistor radio like Kiki's in Kiki's delivery service. (okay, one more quick funny one. One year all she wanted was a dog collar like Lady's. Yes, we're Disney freaks, but I did go to the pet store and get her a collar which she wore for several months on and off until she got out of that phase...now back to our regularly schedule programming...)

So the red transistor radio...do you have any idea how hard that baby was to find. I found one on ebay and ordered it (something like $10.00) then found another one that was much more authentic in a lot of 5 radios. Bought that lot, e-mailed the seller to tell them to keep the other 4 and just send the red one LOL! Got it in the nick of time right before we left for our first and only Christmas at Disney.

A hypothetical answer to your question. If our girls DID make lists with several things on them, I would not feel compelled to get them everything. I don't think that's what Christmas is about and I have strong opinions about kids getting spoiled with stuff.

Oh, and now that our oldest is a "non-believer" it was fun to share with her how hard it was to get that darned radio.