Evening everyone...
First of all thanks fo rbeing the place I needed to get my feelings out...and explain that I actually...may have done the best thing for Carsyn...without intending to...and maybe I need to trust my instincts as a mom for knowing her better than I do sometimes...
Here is what has happened since the "intervention..."
She came upstairs...sat on my bed...and asked me to listen to her...I said absolutley...and then she thanked me...and I about had a small coronary..
see...since we had our talk...and I was bold and frank with her...she hit the net...and her school...has a menu on line...with...calorie intake...and she found it on her own...and was astonished about what she came upon...
Her normal food meal was either between 830 calories and 960...and that was if she did not ask her friends for extras or buy any extras...and the look of awareness...was the same look I had seeing those pics on the Boardwalk...
She said..."I had no idea...why don't they tell you it is so much...?"
She also had looked up on line info for ebery weight loss program...and some personal trainers...and said..."You were right...they all say you need to be aware of how much you are eating and what."
She then said..."I know you love me and were not letting me lie to myself. I know that you want me to do the best I can at whatever I decide so just like getting me coaches for gymnastics and lessons for dance...you want me to be informed about changing my life so I can do the best I can if that is what I want. I am telling you that I knew I was getting heavy...I knew looking at my friends I was not as small as them...I just did not care and did not want to make the commitment to it until now. Now I am ready...can we go shopping together at the grocery store?"
So my beautiful daughter and I hit the Y...we walked (she ran mostly) for 35 minutes...and my speed was only 2.6 average while hers was 3.3 walking and 4.6 running... and at the end...sweating...she pointed out her calories burned...and was laughing...telling me that hse di not even burn off her breakfast...!
Then we hit the grocery store...and we labelled and we shopped and we complained about foods that were a rip off for the amount of calories they had...and she...got it...the pros and cons of food...and the accountability to it...
We are going to strictly be watching calories...it is easier for her and I both...and we are trying glueten free as much as possible...because her docs for her bladder issues had addressed it and think it could only help her by going on a glueten free diet...
We had a blast...and we made supper together...greek salad and we had bacon...no bread...
Carsyn was at a point with diabetes in our family and obesity rampant that she needed to start taking care of herself...
Nancy and others...you are right that I need to lead by example and like I had said also...she needs to be the one wanting to do this for her because none of us one anothers weight issues...but I looked at this as a teaching moment for her...no different than if she had come to me and siad her plan to lose weight was by not eating and becoming anorexic like I did...or if I found out she was bulemic...I want her to be healthy...on her terms...the right way...so at 37 she knows what to do...and that what it takes to be healthy is not some mystery...doesn't mean she is going to be on the same plan as me or same anything...we are totally different...but there are some basic truths to our health that are the same for us all...more water...good foods...and moving more...
Anyway...it was a heartfull day of tears...but she and I really got through a tough bend in the road...I am so greatful today for all of it...because she is a person who needs to be told she doesn't know it all...has been that way since she was born...stong headed and never wrong...(don't know where she got that from?

)...and her first grade teacher called me to explain that Carsyn was walking a fine line...
She had been doing math...was asking the same question over and over...and when Mrs. W told her she needed to listen to the answers to her question and that Mrs W did not think Carsyn was trying her hardest...
Littlke Carsyn...shut her book..cocked her head at Mrs W and asked...
"Mrs W...can you see in my brain?"
Mrs W said "NO"
Carsyn said, "Then how do you not know I am trying my hardest?"
Then we have 4th grade and Mrs B...who called to let me know that Carsyn...desk a messs and unable to close...had been ordered to stay in during recess to clean it out....Carsyn asked..."what shall I do about all the stuff?"
Mrs. b said, "I do not care ...just make sure you can shut it when we get in."
So they came in...and Mrs B looked in shock at Carsyn...who sat like the Chesire cat...had the row next to the windows...and had stacked her entire mess of a desk...nice and neat along the windowsill...explaining to Mrs B that, "You said you did not care what I did with it."
I laugh at her cause she is so me in so many ways...and this is not an easy fix...and I know we both may struggle with our weight...but it is a start...and I am sooo proud of her...
She was on the phone with friends tonight...directing them to the schools nutrition site...and that is huge...because she now wants to make a difference in others lives...and she made a huge difference in my life today...morethan she will ever know...
Laughing along with you all..and Liz..looove the hair...sexy, svelt and a superstar!