Hey it's me again......Have a question

[Piglet203]

Hey everyone, as most of you know Mickey76 broke up with me and took the ring back last Sunday. Right now I am trying to stay strong and it seems that the only way to do that is to think angry thoughts. For instance I keep getting mad at the way he broke up with me (no emotion...selfish....etc.) I am also very mad because yesterday I saw him at a school seminar and just like I had expected.....he totally ignored me.. It's as if I fell of the face of the earth. The week before I was his wife to be and now.......I am invisible. My main problem is that I feel he owes me more than this. I didn't get a good enough reason for him "needing time" I find it hard to believe that feelings change over a couple days. And for him to act as though he doesn't care....never cared....hurts me. I mean we were together 1 year and 8months and engaged!!!!
My question is.......even though he said last week "Don't call, write, or anything.." Should I get in touch just to tell him the things that I need back that are at his house...not to mention a little more explanation and then we can move on. It's such a confusing situtaion for me and everyone that knows me and "us" I'm sorry but I needed to vent.......thanks for all that listen and reply
Carey

 

[worm761]

{{HUGS}} carey. this is the first i have heard of you breakup. so sorry.
i know it is hard. if you really need these things from his house then call. i have always found it best to avoid the person just to give myself time to get used to not being with them and to get over it. but it does take time.

 

[snoopy]

My advice would be to let things go for a bit, let him cool down. If you were engaged to this man, I really doubt he has stopped loving you. He is probably just hurt and angry, but when he cools down, he'll be able to see the situation more clearly.

Good luck to you. Nothing worse than a broken heart, hope yours mends quickly.

 

[6_Time_Momma]

Don't have much advice for you, but my best wishes to you. {{HUGS}}

 

[JasonLyons]

leave him alone

 

[CamColt]

So sorry to hear this!!! Pixie dust to you, and him too! Im sure its not as easy on him as it looks to you. He must be hurting too. I know from reading both of your posts how much you cared for each other. You would never post without mentioning the other ones name in your post.
While I do feel you should give him time, I also think he owes you more of an explaination. If for nothing else, you need closure to get over him and move on with your life. Without a valid reason, you will never feel that readiness. I guess Im not much help since I dont really have an answer for you. Hope the pixie dust works at least.
Take care, and we are all here for you!

 

[rbuzzotta]

So sorry to hear about this. Give him time to cool down. Give yourself time to venture out and do new things.

I understand you are hurt and I wish I could help take your hurt away.

Best of luck.

 

[Gail T AGAIN]

jason, I told her the same thing, it is the best medicine she can give herself.

How old is this little boy and I call him a little boy because he is acting that way. Instead of him telling you what bothers him he just walks away, are't guys a hoot, the S**k big time.

 

[helenabear]

Carey, I am so sorry he is treating you this way still I would give him a little more time to cool off. Hopefully he will come around to the point where he will at least be willing to talk to you. My "harsh" thought is that if he doesn't come around to at least talk to you, at least you found out now before it was "too late" I think after giving it some time (and how long I couldn't say... a few weeks, a month, I don't quite know) you could try and contact him and get a full explanation out of him... you deserve that much I think. In the mean time, try writing him letters. You may not give him them in the end, but for me I found it to be a good way to "get it all out" I do hope things look up soon for you though {{hugs}}

 

[mickey65]

{{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}

Do you keep a journal? Sometimes it helps to write what we are feeling....not think about what to write, just let the feelings whtatever they may be flow out.

Some really good advice I got once that really helped me, was to say good-bye with an open heart. Feel your saddness, your longing and your joy. Be greatful for the time that you shared together, for the time that he universe led you together. We are in control of our own emotions and we can dwell in the anger and frustration and question why why why, or we can let go with love in our hearts knowing that we helped each other along our journey. This may not make sense right now, it sure did not when I was going through my divorce, but in time it may.

I wish you the best, I know how painful this must be for you.

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{more hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

 

[d.kurz]

While I waited the few seconds it takes for this board to load, I thought...I wonder how Piglet203 is making out? I had hoped for better for you. I guess you better give him the room he needs, though I'd be extremely angry, too. And so hard that you have to see him once in a while. Good luck to you, Piglet. I'll be watching to see when things get better!

 

[BibbidiBobbidiBOO]

yea, I had been wondering too. I am real surprised this is still going on. I did not think it was anything major. Your posts when planning your wdw trip showed lots of love for one another. Hang in there and give him a little space. Not knowing all the details, it is hard to advise you what to do. I do think writing things down helps. More {Hugs} for you.

 

[Piglet203]

Thank you to everyone that replied!!! It really means a lot to have people respond and give me their thoughts on the issue. At this point I am not looking to fix things with him, if that's how I came off. My main concern right now is to get the things that are mine at his house. I feel that once I get the stuff then if I see him, so what...I won't have to talk to him. I don't know what his thoughts are (obviously since he is avoiding me ) but I do know that his actions are pretty crappy. I mean like I said, whether he is confused or doesn't want me anymore....fine, but give the person that you were with and did love and so on....more than a cold hearted breakup filled with selfishness. If anything the whole thing opened my eyes and told me what he's really about. Liek I said it is a crappy feeling to be treated this way, but out of it I will be a better, stronger person.....I hope! Thanks again for listening and please write me again soon.
Carey

 

[addicted_to_WDW]

I'm sorry you have to go through this, but I'm glad you found out relatively early. Love is wonderful, but the end of it really bites.

Don't contact him. It makes you look needy. The best gift you can give yourself right now is the gift of dignity. He hurt you, but you have to rise above it. You will get through, and it won't always hurt (spoken from someone whose heart was nearly destroyed in her earlier years).

If there are things you truly need from his house, have a friend retrieve them for you. Seeing him even only to pick up a few things will hurt you and empower him.

Good luck

 

[browneyes]

I didn't know you 2 broke up. I'm sorry. I'd definately get in touch with him to tell him you want your stuff back. As for hashing this out with him, he probably won't listen. You can talk until you're blue in the face and he'll ignore everything you say (men ). The best thing to do for YOU is to sit down and write a letter to him to express how you feel about all this, but don't give it to him just yet-if ever. Writing down how you feel will take a burden off of you. Place the letter in a safe place and read it to yourself in 6 months or so to see how things have gotten better (I know it doesn't seem like things will get better right now, but they will). {{hugs}}

 

[BibbidiBobbidiBOO]

I also think you should have a friend retrieve your stuff for you. Since he did the breaking up, he should make the first contact if there is to be any- IMHO. Good luck!

 

[Piglet203]

Well, I just thought I'd let you guys know that I did contact him. I only wanted to call and let him know that I want my things and that I'd like them to be ready for me. I now feel like I can be strong and get closure. I am still hurt and angry with his coldness to me..but I will be ok. I am going tomorrow to get my things and am sure i will feel better after it. Thanks again for listening and helping me.
Carey

 

[BibbidiBobbidiBOO]

Let us know how it goes tomorrow. For some reason, I am still hoping for a fairy tale ending for you guys. Your engagement was too romantic to end this way ! Oh well, ignore me and my visions for you, do what is right for YOU! Good luck tomorrow.

 

[shortbun]

Take a friend with you. Ask them to drive
so if you are upset when you leave-you
can still make the exit you need to make.
Get your stuff and go as quietly as
possible. Write it all down and later
you can get rid of what you've written.
I'm so sorry you are feeling powerless
and hurt. Regain that power somewhere
else, find some successes. Right now all
you have to do is put one foot in front
of another-you can do it!
mimi

 

[Serena]

Goodluck today