Feeling anxious

[Baklava]

Which I suppose is to be expected, given that I have an anxiety disorder.

The whole WDW process is starting to freak me out a little. We're flying from the West Coast and it's a bit overwhelming.

Our party includes me and my anxiety disorder, my spectrum 5 year old, my husband and my 18 year old.

Being confined for long periods causes panic attacks. I learned at DL that a GAC was a reasonable accommodation, but we haven't been since DAS, so it's a new system plus a first timer in WDW.

The 5 year old is high functioning but can suffer sensory overload. I'm waffling between getting a stroller as wheelchair tag we may not need/use or toughing it out and hoping for the best.

One of the things that triggers my anxiety is being worried that people are watching/judging/think I'm cheating the system. Are people (especially CMs) going to be critical (even silently) of the fact that my kid is just fine most of the day and only at select moments needs the extra help?

I can't even begin to sort our FP+ and DAS and TWO people having DAS. (Do we only do one DAS return time at a time? Do we do one on her band and one on mine? Is that manipulating the system? Do our FP+ for later in the day prevent a regular FP or a DAS return before that?)

Now I need a pill. :sigh:

 

[OurBigTrip]

Which I suppose is to be expected, given that I have an anxiety disorder.

The whole WDW process is starting to freak me out a little. We're flying from the West Coast and it's a bit overwhelming.

Our party includes me and my anxiety disorder, my spectrum 5 year old, my husband and my 18 year old.

Being confined for long periods causes panic attacks. I learned at DL that a GAC was a reasonable accommodation, but we haven't been since DAS, so it's a new system plus a first timer in WDW.

The 5 year old is high functioning but can suffer sensory overload. I'm waffling between getting a stroller as wheelchair tag we may not need/use or toughing it out and hoping for the best.

One of the things that triggers my anxiety is being worried that people are watching/judging/think I'm cheating the system. Are people (especially CMs) going to be critical (even silently) of the fact that my kid is just fine most of the day and only at select moments needs the extra help?

I can't even begin to sort our FP+ and DAS and TWO people having DAS. (Do we only do one DAS return time at a time? Do we do one on her band and one on mine? Is that manipulating the system? Do our FP+ for later in the day prevent a regular FP or a DAS return before that?)

Now I need a pill. :sigh:

OK, first things first...

I can only speak to my sister's experience with the DAS, and she encountered nothing but helpful, cheerful CMs when using her DAS. While I understand that the perceived judgments of others might create anxiety for you, you can't really control what other people think, say or do. All you can do is do what's best for you and your family so that you can enjoy your trip.

Stroller as a wheelchair - this is separate from DAS, but is obtained at the same time. If you think you'll need it, you should get it.

Two DAS - if you all will be staying together all the time, you won't need two. If you think there will be times when you will be separated, as in you're riding something with your older child while your DH rides with your younger child, then get two.

With the DAS now being electronic, it will be on your Magic Band or ticket, not on a separate card. My understanding is that when there is more than one DAS in a group, everyone in the group can be associated with each DAS, BUT each person can only have one wait time at a time. For example, you would have all four of you on your DAS and on your DD's DAS, and you get a return 12:00 PM return time for you and your son on your DAS. You could not get a return time for you or your son on your DD's DAS until you have ridden or cancelled the return time on your DAS.

There is no longer any regular FP at WDW - it's all FP+ now, and they are on your Magic Bands or tickets. A FP+ time will not prevent you from getting a DAS return time, nor will a DAS return time prevent you from getting a FP+ time. You are initially limited to three FP+ times, but you can get more, one at a time, once those three are gone.

Additional FP+ times or changes can be made at kiosks throughout the park. DAS return times can only be obtained at the rides themselves, not at the kiosks.

 

[Baklava]

Thank you.

And you're right, I can't control other people, but part of making the best trip for me (and therefore my family) involves avoiding situations where I feel like I'm being judged.

I think we'll get a DAS for me, a stroller as wheelchair tag for her and hope that we never use them.

 

[lanejudy]

Many people use DAS. It is primarily for invisible disabilities, so most "look" perfectly fine or "normal." If you've been fine at DL with a GAC and didn't feel people were judging, I would think you'll be fine at WDW with DAS.

For the stroller-as-wheelchair tag -- you do not need to use it at all times if your son is coping well, feel free to park the stroller. Either get it and have it "just in case" or wait to request it until you find you need it.

DAS -- if two of you need the DAS both will get one. However, each member of your party can only have 1 DAS return time attached to his/her ticket/magicband at a time. So your family will be split (2+2); no worries about double-dipping. As PP points out, unless your group plans to split up anyway, you could just get the DAS for one of you. That might relieve some of your anxiety as well, only having 1 to worry about.

Enjoy your vacation!

 

[kaytieeldr]

The CMs will not judge you.
The other guests will generally be to involved with their own enjoyment to be concerned about you using the DAS.
Most importantly, the DAS does what the GAc should have done: it provides any alternate place to wait when the lines are long. See the locked WDW DAS thread pinned at the top of this forum.

 

[Aladora]

Thank you.

And you're right, I can't control other people, but part of making the best trip for me (and therefore my family) involves avoiding situations where I feel like I'm being judged.

I think we'll get a DAS for me, a stroller as wheelchair tag for her and hope that we never use them.

I was going to reply earlier but got distracted!

This plan sounds like the best idea for your family. Hope things go as smoothly as you could wish!

 

[WDWJonasGirl]

Hi!! I'm a recently turned 20 year old with autism. Depending on how tall your DD is, I would reccomend getting one DAS for you and one for your DD. Just an FYI, your whole party will need to be together when you get the DAS because now they link it to your magicbands/tickets. Get the stroller as a wheelchair tag just incase otherwise you can park it Have a great trip!!

 

[kandb]

I get anxiety and have learned to mange it. I don't want to sound harsh but you have to rise above caring what other people think. You have to tell yourself, who cares what some strangers in Disney world think. Focus on yourself and your family and "don't even go there", when you start thinking about strangers. Go, have fun and don't sweat the small stuff!

 

[mamabunny]

Which I suppose is to be expected, given that I have an anxiety disorder.

...Our party includes me and my anxiety disorder, my spectrum 5 year old, my husband and my 18 year old...

...One of the things that triggers my anxiety is being worried that people are watching/judging/think I'm cheating the system. Are people (especially CMs) going to be critical (even silently) of the fact that my kid is just fine most of the day and only at select moments needs the extra help?

@Baklava, please know that you are not alone in your anxiety. My husband and his anxiety disorder have traveled with me for almost 30 years now.

My DH shares your anxiety about being watched/judged, and additionally, he has a "super-trigger" about going to unfamiliar places. As a result, I take most of our vacations TWICE - I will literally travel ahead to *personally* see everything (lodging, dining, attractions, airports, etc.) and then - and only then - will he be able to go to a new place. It took several years before he could learn to trust my "trip reports", and felt comfortable enough to begin to travel. Now, he has actually begun to talk about getting an RV for retirement, and boldly going where no DH has gone before!

The irony of the situation is that he works for a major airline... we could (literally) fly to a different destination every weekend if we wanted to. But most weekends find us within 25 miles of home!

When we go into a new restaurant, even in our hometown, my DH can be especially anxious. His feelings of being watched/judged become very prominent. He feels like other people are watching him eat, or that they are judging how he is dressed, or if he picks up the wrong fork, or even that he eats weird. One of the ways we address his comfort needs in those situations is by making sure that his back is to a wall (literally) so that he can see everyone else around him. (That helps reduce his anxiety because he doesn't have to worry about what is going on behind him). The other thing we do is, as a family, we sit around him whenever possible, to form a "shield" between him and the rest of the room. It helps - enough that he can successfully dine out almost anywhere he wants to now.

So I get it. That feeling is very overwhelming, and in an environment like WDW, it can feel almost out of control.

Please take a deep breath, and remember these things while you are at WDW:
- Literally, put your back against a wall (or a fence, or some other divider, even another family member) whenever possible. Now you don't have to worry about what is behind you - only what is before you - your beautiful family, having a wonderful time!
- Watch YouTube videos (and check out Periscope, too!) to see what it looks like both outside and inside of attractions at WDW. There are untold hours of video on the internet of WDW; simply being somewhat familiar with where you are going to be will help your anxiety.
- Keep an eye open for little pockets in the parks where you and your family can take a quick breather away from crowds. Remember that if your anxiety becomes acute, you can always check in at Medical in every park.
- You will never see these people again. Literally, your odds of winning the lottery are better than your odds of running into someone from WDW outside your vacation. The chances of you actually running into ANY of the people you see or meet at WDW again are so small its not even worth bothering yourself about.
- Everyone else around - and I can't stress this enough - EVERYONE ELSE around you is *SO* absorbed in their own vacation, and plans, and concerns about FP+, and will we get to BOG in time for our lunch? and wait, did we leave the baby's bottle at the last QuickServ? and... that they won't notice you. I'm not saying that to be mean; it's just that most guests at WDW are often completely unaware of what is going on around them, outside of their own family/group. Unless it directly impacts them (you run over their foot with a wheelchair) the other guests at WDW won't care.
- You are in control of your anxiety. Now, I know - from living with a person who has a large anxiety disorder for nearly 30 years - that there are times when it feels like your disorder is controlling you. BUT, I also know that you - more than anyone else in the world - knows what your triggers are, and you know what your "relief valves" are. By planning ahead (for example, coming here to openly discuss your issue, and gain information about what to expect) and by visualizing a positive outcome prior to your vacation ("I am going to have a great time, and I am NOT going to worry about anyone but my family!") you will help to control your anxiety.

I hope you have the most Magical trip possible!

 

[cornflkgrl]

I get anxiety and have learned to mange it. I don't want to sound harsh but you have to rise above caring what other people think. You have to tell yourself, who cares what some strangers in Disney world think. Focus on yourself and your family and "don't even go there", when you start thinking about strangers. Go, have fun and don't sweat the small stuff!

As someone with an anxiety disorder who travels with two kids with invisible disabilities, I second this advice. Though I know it is most definitely easier said than done on some days. If you find yourself drifting to that obsessive place of "what if..." or "what must THEY be thinking?!" You have to be assertive and remind yourself that you have a right to go on vacation or go out just as much as anyone else does and you have a right not to have to explain yourself to anyone you don't want and/or need to. Accommodations are there if you need to use them and when it comes down to it, it really isn't anyone else's business about yours or your family member's medical issues. Have a great trip!

 

[Glittercat]

The 5 year old is high functioning but can suffer sensory overload. I'm waffling between getting a stroller as wheelchair tag we may not need/use or toughing it out and hoping for the best.

It sounds like maybe you should get the DAS for at least 1 of you, but I have 0 experience with it so would listen to the advice of the others. The wheelchair tag sounds like a good precaution for your 5 year old, and even if you never need to use it it may ease your mind to have one.

One of the things that triggers my anxiety is being worried that people are watching/judging/think I'm cheating the system.

Oh I hear that! I've PTSD, a body that does not work quite right, and a wheelchair sometimes I feel the same way.

I get anxiety and have learned to mange it. I don't want to sound harsh but you have to rise above caring what other people think. You have to tell yourself, who cares what some strangers in Disney world think. Focus on yourself and your family and "don't even go there", when you start thinking about strangers. Go, have fun and don't sweat the small stuff!

Wonderful advice!

Now, he has actually begun to talk about getting an RV for retirement, and boldly going where no DH has gone before!

Unless it directly impacts them (you run over their foot with a wheelchair) the other guests at WDW won't care.

Agreed! Except for lines, those have been trying sometimes in relation to people being cattier than normal. Usually though everything rolls along smoothly.

All in all try not stress too much, and listen to your heart about what your family does need. At DL a very rude woman implied (and said) that we were one of those groups who payed a handicapped person to get into rides early. I nearly cried as those people she referred to were my brother, his two boys, my two children, my husband and myself. It hurt, but those moments are thankfully rare.

Far more often you'll encounter smiles, friendliness, and truly wonderful interactions with others. Honestly there is not a trip that has gone by that was not full to the brim with the beauty of others! It is possible that one of you will get a scowl, and unkind word, or something similar at some point, but the good will outweigh the bad. P.s.we fly from the West coast too and I'm always a bit nervous until we're actually airborne!

Hope you have a magical vacation!

 

[ojeight]

We had someone that suffered with anxiety disorder on our last trip and the DAS card. No one said anything or really even paid attention as you are going through the fast pass lanes. Now that the DAS is built into the magic bands, people will just think you are using a fast pass.

 

[TheRustyScupper]

One of the things that triggers my anxiety is being worried that people are watching/judging/think I'm cheating the system. Are people (especially CMs) going to be critical (even silently) of the fact that my kid is just fine most of the day and only at select moments needs the extra help?

CM's would never question you aloud whether the granting of a DAS to you or the kid was warranted.