father in law threw a kink in our plans

[Bethenny]

If you own 2 homes outright, then you should have no trouble getting an HELOC on one of them.

 

[wvjules]

If you own 2 homes outright, then you should have no trouble getting an HELOC on one of them.

For $100....plus interest. lol

 

[Bethenny]

It seems they could use an emergency fund as well.

 

[Swan4Me]

I own my home and my rental property free and clear. (wanna talk to be about budgetting? I'm 27 and own 2 homes (one worth 450k and the other 150k, .

so did you pay for the $450k in full-or is it one of your "flipped" houses?

 

[SleepyatDVC]

OP, is there a reason why your MIL cannot watch your niece while your FIL drives you to the airport? If your flight is extremely early in the morning, then he should be back home before your BIL leaves for the stadium but if not, can't she handle it alone for a little while?

I'm sure she can but seems like they are not willing to make it work if FIL backed out of the favor already.

OP, I truly understand that you are just venting about the whole thing. I read the ENTIRE thread and it sounds that it truly isn't just about the money but the entire situation. I'm sorry that you feel let down by family after you thought you could count on them since they already promised to do you this favor.

Sounds to me that you have your financial house in order and DO help family in need. It's not that you would throw them out on the street for not reciprocating "favors." It's just that it truly is HURTFUL when they not only take you for granted but seem to be extra unappreciative of you.

Sometimes it is (or should be) better to vent to strangers. If it has already been decided that you and your husband aren't going to let his family live on the street, then venting to him about them can cause unnecessary friction between the 2 of you. It would be different if you truly can't afford to "put them up" and HAD to give them tough love. Of course, you may be enabling them - but that is a whole other thread! LOL.

Sounds to me that the financial burden of providing housing for them isn't breaking you but is just causing you to be even MORE frugal than you naturally are.

My parents and my family always take each other to the airport because the frugal side of us just can not FATHOM spending over $100 or parking or car service when it's just a quick drop off or pick up. HOWEVER, the closest airport is usually 15 minutes away and the farthest one we use is about 45 minutes away.

When we are talking about over 60 minutes away or 2 hours round trip (in your case 4 hours round trip) then the cost savings really isn't enough for us to make the drive. In our case, we would never book a flight at an airport so far away. We would pay more per ticket to fly from a closer airport. (Not everyone has a choice of a closer airport.) But if it did require such a long drive, we would just have to account for the parking.

Our time is money and 4 hours of driving (2 round trips) is worth more than $100. Might be different if it was $300 for parking. 8 hours of driving (2 4hr rd trips) is a lot of driving to save $100 IMHO. However, I also understand that different people put different price value on their time.

OP, I hope you find an affordable alternative to having your FIL drop you off. I hope after a while you can let go of some of the hurt and bitterness in your heart.

Maybe try to look at it from your FIL point of view in this instance that he is not rejecting YOU and your family by backing out on a promise to do a favor for another family member. Maybe he feels that this is a rare opportunity to see his other granddaughter that he never gets to see (you said SIL doesn't let them see her). I think if I were him, I might jump at that chance too and hope that you would understand and be able to find other means if I told you early enough.

I hope you all have a WONDERFUL trip!!

 

[loriandmatt]

Darn tootin I am. I believe family should help one another. DH has anxiety disorder, he can barely make it to airport with all the thoughts of what if this goes wrong , or that... he is a mess. He shakes, gets sick. Theres no way he can drive, let alone get on a plane. If I drive he claims to be car sick. his dad can keep him calm. Thats the reason too he is needed.

ya know....after reading this entire thread (yea, i know. i was waiting for a conf call to start. i had some time to kill) i can see why you are bitter.

you keep saying "if you can't count on family, who can you count on?" .....well it seems you live by that credo, but your in laws do not. and from what you just said (in the above quote) about your husband's disorder, perhaps you in some way have some animosity towards him that he can't or won't confront his family about the way they are using you/him. the drive to/from the airport is the least of it, but truly the straw that broke the camel's back.

i am sympathetic to your plight.

i truly hope you:
A.) find some solution to your airport ordeal
B.) can express to your DH how you can't tolerate being a giver to his family anymore when you never recieve the appreciation or reciprocation that should be present in a family.
and very importantly.....
C.) enjoy your vacation. you sound like you need it.

 

[Octoberbabiesrus]

Maybe annual trips where you have to travel a long distance & fly shouldn't be a priority for a someone who is so anxious. What does your DH do once he's at the airport or at Disney without his dad there? I can't imagine these trips are enjoyable for your DH if his anxiety is that bad.

Once we are on the plane, he's shakey about it all... once we are in Orlando, he does fine. The first day's a bit touchy, then he's fine. Only issue? If we cant fly somewhere, we cant go. He cant do long drives. To the north side of chicago is about his limit.

 

[nunzia]

Darn tootin I am. I believe family should help one another. DH has anxiety disorder, he can barely make it to airport with all the thoughts of what if this goes wrong , or that... he is a mess. He shakes, gets sick. Theres no way he can drive, let alone get on a plane. If I drive he claims to be car sick. his dad can keep him calm. Thats the reason too he is needed.

This is getting a little crazy..If DH can't get on the plane from anxiety then how is he getting on the plane after FIL drives him and FIL driving is the ONLY way he can get around..really turning odd here.....DH has anxiety disorder but can work so you are SAHM? You have no cash but flipped houses and own 2? Your DH family let a trailer go but live in your second house rent free? Two of your kids have serious issues? but you are taking a WDW trip with no money but can only go if FIL drives but first it was the money to park that was the issue? I'm sorry..but this is really sounding wacky..

 

[Octoberbabiesrus]

ya know....after reading this entire thread (yea, i know. I was waiting for a conf call to start. I had some time to kill) i can see why you are bitter.

You keep saying "if you can't count on family, who can you count on?" .....well it seems you live by that credo, but your in laws do not. And from what you just said (in the above quote) about your husband's disorder, perhaps you in some way have some animosity towards him that he can't or won't confront his family about the way they are using you/him. the drive to/from the airport is the least of it, but truly the straw that broke the camel's back.

I am sympathetic to your plight.

I truly hope you:
A.) find some solution to your airport ordeal
b.) can express to your dh how you can't tolerate being a giver to his family anymore when you never recieve the appreciation or reciprocation that should be present in a family.
And very importantly.....
C.) enjoy your vacation. You sound like you need it.

bingo.

 

[jm-mom]

You might look into hotel options near the airport. For the cost of leaving your vehicle in an open parking lot at the airport you can often find a hotel airport that will allow you to leave your car there just for one night's stay. If you are leaving early in the am, check into a budget friendly hotel the night before and enjoy your vacation getting an early start. Next morning get on the hotel shuttle to the airport and not have that one hour drive to contend with just before your flight. When you get home, take the hotel shuttle back to the hotel and retrieve your vehicle.

 

[Octoberbabiesrus]

This is getting a little crazy..If DH can't get on the plane from anxiety then how is he getting on the plane after FIL drives him and FIL driving is the ONLY way he can get around..really turning odd here.....DH has anxiety disorder but can work so you are SAHM? You have no cash but flipped houses and own 2? Your DH family let a trailer go but live in your second house rent free? Two of your kids have serious issues? but you are taking a WDW trip with no money but can only go if FIL drives but first it was the money to park that was the issue? I'm sorry..but this is really sounding wacky..

perhaps you need to read more of my posts to understand.

 

[nunzia]

perhaps you need to read more of my posts to understand.

I've read the whole thread...you sound like you must have a very stressful life. I hate to fly as well so I take the train....much cheaper BTW.

 

[GinnyEmma]

I can't imagine taking a man too tripped out to ride with you to the airport to the busiest place on earth. None of it makes sense. I also dint believe that anyone who thinks it is all about family loyalty gossiping about her husband's family in the net. That isn't family like.

And for someone so on top if her finances to freak over $50 is silly. If you are freaking over the drive your husband has a problem with, I'd drive to the city and park overnight at a hotel. Then maybe he can medicate or whatever he does and still get in a plane the next day.

 

[SaraJayne]

I'm finding it kind of hard to have any sympathy over $100 dollars when you say you have two homes and two cars paid off and you're flying out for a Disney vacation. That's like a color blind man wanting sympathy from the blind.

But I do feel bad that you are in this situation with your FIL - not the car ride thing, but his current dependency on you. That is a tough place to be in and it is natural to feel resentment and bitterness over it.

Just because she says it doesn't mean it's true.

I've been through the town she lives in. You won't find a half a million dollar house.

You claim you're "good" at investing, but can't come up with an extra $100 for parking? Uh huh. Sure.

 

[queenbetsey]

OUCH this is one harsh thread! op, is the problem a ride or that fil chose one son over the other. That stinks. I hope you figure out something. Jump online and check the shuttle services and if you are a AAA member call member services and see if they can lead you to a less expensive solution. I get the feeling you were looking for advise on how to defray the extra cost not to get hammered by folks.
I hope that someone here can get you some good information about the airport transportation. When we went our first time in 07 we returned late and rented a car to drive home in and returned it the next day not so much of a big deal and we did not have to pay near what parking would have cost.
I will see what I can dig up online (hey have you checked groupon?)
I hope folks here will get a bit of pixie dust going for you and come up with solutions (other than getting new inlaws which is just obvious but not do able solution..ok probably not a time to make wise cracks)

 

[carebee21]

Just because she says it doesn't mean it's true.

I've been through the town she lives in. You won't find a half a million dollar house.

You claim you're "good" at investing, but can't come up with an extra $100 for parking? Uh huh. Sure.

I completely agree. There's so much wrong with her story.... She even admits the only way they pay for their vacation is through tax returns. Most financially stable people can adjust their taxes accordingly and budget the money in a savings account, so I suspect they're getting the EIC credit and using that....

And most financially secure people don't go running around bragging about what they have and what their homes and cars cost and are worth....

 

[DAD21]

He used to drive a minivan and misses it. He loves ours. And as for sleep, he's up by 4am every day. He's a EARLY riser. He's given no reason. if I wasnt footing the ENTIRE bill for taxes and ins. on the house, I wouldnt be hurting. I have the money for parking, but there goes my kids getting something in WDW, and who wants to be that parent that says SORRY, no. Not to mention the SIL owes me 300. So a ride to the airport, is NOT that big a deal.

I have no problem being the parent that says no. What we need are more parents that say no. Kids don't need everything. The trip isn't enough?? Or do you let what other people think run your life.

 

[jm-mom]

From the posts made by the op this all sounds like a family matter. She should be venting her frustration to her family and working to solve this family conflict. I can understand her being disappointed they have lost their ride to the airport but she should have spoken her frustration and then let the matter go. Rather she keeps defending her posts or making comments to other's posts that only stir the pot further, she should offline and put her house in order metaphorically speaking. My advice to everyone, stop this thread now and move on. She has to work out her family issues and her ride situation and probably some other family/budgeting issues as well and should do so with those people and not online with a bunch of strangers. Many people have made suggestions as to how to best get to the airport. She has the choice to listen or not but to go 15 plus pages of back and forth posts, many of them unkind on all sides, seems ridiculous.

 

[Swan4Me]

ALSO, we dont dine out cause our son has many allergies that make it hard, we cook from scratch. No soy, no dairy, no beef, no egg, no peanuts and almonds..

So you will still cook for your son at WDW-and he wont do the free dining?
Sounds complicated
So is free dining really worth it? Is it free food for everyone in the hotel room?

Wanted to add-if flight is early-like 6am-large airports say get there 2 hours early-so be there at 4 am-leave her house at 3am-so everyone wake up at 2:15!!!-

yeah I sure would not do that-even for somebody i love-I think your FIL is not being unreasonable

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

This story just keeps getting better and better. I'm just reading for the entertainment factor now!