Does anyone else feel like this... For Women Only

[lovewdwdvc]

Well, the size 3 clothes are gone and I am looking at 50 in a few years. That said, we were blessed with a baby when I was 40 and he is going to have a mom who does all of the things with him that the thin 20+ year old moms do with their children. I swim, go down the slides, coach soccer, bike ride and anything that I think is good for my kids. The vacation is all about them.

 

[DVC Sadie]

Well I am 51 years old and I am having too much fun swimming, reading or snacking at the pool to really pay attention to other peoples shapes,bobysize or swimsuits. Go have fun and don't sweat the small, medium or large stuff. Life is way too short. I love cliches.

 

[Gerweniel]

I don't think I was ever a size 3. My sons and I go to the water parks and pools on each trip and I make sure I have a bathing suit that covers me up where I want to be covered up and allows me to be active and not worry about wardrobe malfunctions. My feeling is that it is YOUR vacation and do not stress about your appearance. The only time I can EVER remember anyone in a pool setting was a VERY plus size man who squeezed his business into the smallest speedo ever. Unfortunately, that image is branded in my brain forever.
Please don't feel self conscious, enjoy yourself - you deserve it!

 

[Hannathy]

I do wear the same size as in highschool but I wear a t-shirt into the pool everywhere. Why because I am extremely pale and have a lot of moles. I need to worry about skin cancer because 40 years ago we didn't and I have had several really bad burns. Wear what you are comfortable with, if a t-shirt helps wear it, people will see you are having fun and are happy and will notice that.

Of course if you wear a thong that is 3 sizes too small all bets are off! Have fun and remeber you paid your admission they didn't.

 

[Brooknwdw]

Hi!

Just remember, if it wasn't weight it'd be something else! I am not big, but have bad stretch marks across my stomach, plus that "pooch" you can't lose after a c-section. I can't wear a bikini now because of it...or at least I'm too self conscience to!

I have a friend who is TINY, always had been...looks great in a bikini even after two kids. HER deal is veircose veins...her legs are covered with them & she won't wear shorts!

I guess what I am trying to say is we all have THINGS about ourselves that aren't perfect, but as its been stated, No one is really looking! HAVE FUN!!

Also, I totally agree about the bathing suit you choose...this reminded me of my mom. She has always gotten a really stylish, good quality suit with the matching cover up/"accessories" & though a size 16, she always looks great!

 

[ericafny]

To the OP-->I have come to realize that people are so preoccupied with themselves they are not even looking at you. While I am not overweight there are things that I do not like about my body and am self conscious about things as well. With that being said you are on vacation and are entitled to do whatever you want. Please enjoy yourself and have a wonderful vacation!!!

 

[Feralpeg]

I used to feel the same way you do. Not only am I not nearly as small as I was (I'm now 54), I also have some issues that make me look rather odd thanks to having had breast cancer when I was 31. No matter how hard I try, I can't find a bathing suit that will cover this very nasty scar that runs clear around to my back. On top of that, I am rather lopsided from my surgery. For many years, I wouldn't get in the pool at WDW with my DD. Looking back, I wish I hadn't let my body image fears keep me from enjoying that special time with DD.

As others have said, try not to worry about it. Nice people won't care what you look like. Those who would judge are not the type of people you should be concerned with anyway.

 

[LeahA]

There is not too many women that feel good in their swimsuits! I have friends who are a size 6 or 8 and they feel just as self conscious as me who is a size 12/14 depending on what brand I buy.

I would go swimming an enjoy myself. Ignore other people if the are so rude to stare at you. I have to admit if I saw someone extrememly large, man or woman or child, I would look, take a glance, and go back to my own business. Nobody should make you feel uncomfortable that you can't enjoy your vacation.

Stay strong!

 

[kaysmommie]

I've been visiting Disney now for 18 years. Have always loved the pools and to swim. Well, I'm 44 now and not in my 26 year old body. I was a size 3 back then and it will suffice to say I'm not that any longer. I also have an illness that makes my body retain fluid. Face, hands, feet, armpits, etc. I

The problem is I still love the pools but I am too ashamed of my appearance to enjoy it anymore. Besides weight gain the fluid makes my top half look lopsided (don't really know how to articulate this), and I feel like people are looking at me.

DH ends up so angry at me for this. He says that it's my illness and he's absolutely right, but people don't know I have a medical disorder when they see me. I know DH loves me and a lot of it is he dosen't like to see me hurt, but I can't help how I feel.

Has anyone else ever had this problem and any advice on how to just deal with it. Last year we went to the quiet pool but it's not the same, I may be 44 but I do love the water slide.

I feel the same way after having two children, actually DS was 10 lbs. and totally ruined me. I was also small size 2 before kids (27 when I had DD). I have a disguisting stretch out belly and I really don't like wearing bathing suits anymore. I bloat really bad too, but I don't know why? I have and underactive thyroid which adds 15-20lbs to my 5' 2" body. I will never get used to myself like this. DH says nothing basically, but I know he doesn't exactly like how I look, which makes me feel like crap because I had his 2 children. He probably would be looking at the 25 yr. olds when I"m not looking. When we go to Disney I'm going down the waterslide anyway! I will probably never see those people again so I don't care what they think (trying hard to tell myself that). I just want to have a good time like everyone else but would be easier if I didn't feel disgusting. I think some people have a harder time with this than others. I really feel for you because it's out of your control when you have a medical condition. If you don't mind me asking, what causes you to retain fluid? You should try to enjoy yourself as that's what Disney is all about! Others don't notice our flaws as much as we do. I wish I knew what to say to make you feel better but alot of us have this issue so you are not alone. I say go to the main pool and try to have fun with your DH. I'm glad your DH is understanding because that really is important. Nobody is perfect and we all we change and get older too. To the men that have posted here you are awesome, wish my DH felt that way , he thinks I should look like I live in Laguna Beach. Even if I want to focus on my little kids and have fun he will stare at my belly pouch and make me want to cry! If people stare or judge you by how you look in a swimsuit they are jerks anyway and not worth knowing. Just enjoy your next vacation!!!

 

[O2BNWDW]

Op I have to chime in. I too have avoided the pool because I was so self conscience of my appearance in a bathing suit. (cellulite) UGH! But after a few years of being BCV DVC members I was so sick of not taking advantage of the coolest pool on property. I finally went once in 2004 but have not been back since.

No longer! I found (actually husband found) a bathing suit that was a godsend to me, it is very feminine covers my problem area. I will no longer bar myself from the pool.

Find a suit that camoflauges your problem areas and you will never think twice about going in the pool again. QVC just had a special on "It figures" (I think that was the brand name) bathing suits and I was amazed at the different styles and patterns that addresses EVERY problem you can think of! They have a website you can shop on also. Yes they were a little pricey but for me I would pay that price to have ease of mind. Also, try TJ Maxx that is where I got my suit. I hope this helps.

BTW I agree with the other posters, others don't care what you look like, we are to blame for putting such pressure on ourselves.

 

[ExPirateShopGirl]

As Dr Suess once told us...

Those that mind don't matter.... and the ones who matter, don't mind.

It's funny how we, as parents, make sure our kids learn these lessons... but we seem to forget them ourselves.

Enjoy yourself!

 

[Kahana-ri]

I am thirty something with one child. During pregnancy I gained weight and horrible stretch marks. I would never be in a bikini ever again in public. Not like I had a bikini body to begin with, but it least it was a somewhat option. I always freak out when bathing suit weather comes around. Every time we are about to go on vacation, I get on this diet kick-got to get thinner! DH gets frustrated becuase he doesn't understand why I only stress about my weight when we go on vacation? I just get motivated. All of my swim suits are tankini tops and board shorts. I can't do bikini bottoms becuase my thighs even have stretch marks. I cover up and try to enjoy myself. I believe I am my worst enemy and critic.
Enjoy yourself and be in the moment. You never should give up such a wonderful thing as enjoying the pool while on vacation.

 

[mommykds]

Let me admit that I am an over 40 male. I know it said "Women Only" but ladies, c'mon. You are on vacation. WHO CARES, you will never see these people again anyway. Real men are not looking anyway, they are much too busy looking at their own wifes or, more likely chasing after their three kids. Those extra "baby pounds" are, and let me say this loudly, A BADGE OF HONOR. Finally, take a look back. Most of the men you think are looking at you are nothing to write home about anyway. (me included) My advice to you is wear what you feel comfortable in on vacation. Anyone who takes exception to what you are wearing can take a flying leap in the Living Seas for all I care. Have fun.

Very well said! Thanks for the male perspective!

To the OP...Enjoy yourself!!!

 

[Wonders10]

Well I'm not a mom and I'm 25 but my body is nowhere near where it should be. And it really never has been. I usually stress myself out before a vacation trying to lose as much weight as possible so I can fit in cute tanks and look decent in my bathing suit but I usually never lose what I intend. Then once I'm there, I realize that I'm not judging the other people I see that aren't in the best shape so they probably aren't judging me. Also, have you seen the amount of people that are overweight/out of shape at disney? I find we are in the majority there. I say to enjoy yourself because nobody is probably paying any attention to you anyway. Now I just have to follow my own advice.

*Shannon

 

[Luvamouse]

Oh, wait, it wasn't me. I guess I'm not the only one worried about going in the pool. I think all the people who have posted here have hit the important things.

I think that everytime I see a woman who has had a mastectomy, a person missing a limb or unable to swim/enter the pool alone, a woman or child with a bald head (not by choice), a way too large to look "good" in a suit lady(maybe in the mirror ), someone with obvious scars...I am proud of them for being there and not caring what others think. Maybe I should start to look at myself the way I look at others. I was planning to do laundry and other "mom" things while tall, thin DH and my skinny girls swim. Maybe not anymore...

A special thanks to the guys who felt the need to chime in.

I'd rather see a heavy person in a suit that fits than a thinner person in a too small suit any day.

Heidi

 

[pezpam]

About 10 years ago, I got bone cancer. The I had a baby by C-section. Then I got bone cancer again. Because of the cancer's impact on my leg, I will never be able to exercise heavily again and will always be overweight. I will spend most of my day, every day, in pain. BUT, a very wise friend of mine, who lives in more pain and with more physical problems than I do said something to me that just stuck.

We were at a convention with a bunch of friends. We were talking about all of the pain and how to make it day-to-day. She said "Well, I can be in pain sitting at home in my rocking chair or I can be in pain in Paris seeing the Eiffel Tower."

As much as we worry about this stuff, it really is that simple. Whether it's pain or being overweight or scars or anything else, we've got that stuff anyway. We can sit out of the fun and deny ourselves experiences, or we can jump in and enjoy life and the pool and WDW. Every time I get self-conscious, I remember her words and jump in. I have yet to regret it.......

 

[ptrbryant]

DH says nothing basically, but I know he doesn't exactly like how I look, which makes me feel like crap because I had his 2 children. He probably would be looking at the 25 yr. olds when I"m not looking.

Are you sure this may not be your perception and he doesn't have a problem with your appearance? I ask because I sincerely hope that's the case. I'm a size 14/16 (!), far from the size 6/8 I was when I first met DH. It honestly doesn't bother him...you know, maybe it would if he saw me scarfing down bags of potato chips or ordering Big Macs, etc. But, he sees that I eat "normally", try to go for a rigorous walk most days and it's obviously a metabolic issue to some degree (I take Synthroid for an underactive thyroid, too). He's got a receding hairline and will often joke that if I don't mind his thinning hair, he certainly doesn't mind my bigger waistline! He's always very encouraging and keeps telling me not to buy clothes that "hide" my figure, etc.
If I had a DH who was critical of me--just because of weight--I would be so upset, it's hard to imagine.

Karla B.

 

[Avalanche]

I have never been a size 4 and struggled for years to be a 14.

I use to worry what others think but my thought now is I will never see these people again, so who cares.

Also, I think it is more disgusting to look at the people who think they still wear the size they wore 10 years ago when they should be wearing 2 size larger.

 

[msteddom]

I feel like that too when I am trying on my bathing suit in my bedroom, but when I out to the pool or one of the waterparks, I am having too much fun to care! Plus I have NEVER been the largest, ot the least attactive person there. Please go enjoy yourself!


Melissa

 

[sm4987]

Yup, I feel like this too. Two years ago, I dropped 60 pounds. I've still maintained that and am a size 2. However with 2 kids and no matter how much I work out, I still am very ashamed. Makes my DH totally ticked off with me, not to mention hearing the kids say but mom............... I'm working on getting over it, but it is hard!!!! However, I am learning that life is to short and we pay up the hilt to go to disney and enjoy it, so for me, I'm learning to just go and do it!