Cost of raising a child in the US now over $300,000, not including college

[tvguy]

That's not taking into account people who need before-school care since school starts around 8:15 every day and if you need to be in the office by 9 and you don't live near where you work (which will often skyrocket cost of living) you also need to pay for before school care that starts at 7 am.

They went with open enrollment here for schools about 20 years ago. Kid's don't automatically go to their neighborhood school anymore. And to avoid child care issues, a popular option is for parents to place their child in the school closest to where they work, not where they live. Most of the before school childcare here opens at 6 am, but there are a few centers open 24 hours so you can drop your child off earlier if need be.

 

[EilonwyWanderer]

They went with open enrollment here for schools about 20 years ago. Kid's don't automatically go to their neighborhood school anymore. And to avoid child care issues, a popular option is for parents to place their child in the school closest to where they work, not where they live. Most of the before school childcare here opens at 6 am, but there are a few centers open 24 hours so you can drop your child off earlier if need be.

Wow it's like the opposite here--you have to go with your local school system and some of them have lottery systems so that you could end up at ANY school within the district, even if you live right next to a different one. Luckily ours isn't like that and we can go to our closest one.

 

[barkley]

They went with open enrollment here for schools about 20 years ago. Kid's don't automatically go to their neighborhood school anymore. And to avoid child care issues, a popular option is for parents to place their child in the school closest to where they work, not where they live. Most of the before school childcare here opens at 6 am, but there are a few centers open 24 hours so you can drop your child off earlier if need be.

that might be an option if you work within the district you live in but i found that to be the exception vs. the rule when i was living in no cal. the majority of people were like myself and commuting 2 or more counties away to the bay area b/c wages were higher. i had co-workers who were spending hours commuting. open enrollment is permitted within some districts (not all) but not county to county (our office was a resource for obtaining proof of residency for the county it was located in and the individual districts within it) and one of the factors that frequently played into a person's choice to live so far away from their work was the desire to have their kids attend school in more desirable districts.

 

[Cheburashka]

I'm not sure if the article took that kind of thing into account. And the fact is, we didn't consider it a sacrifice - we never gave it a moment's thought, actually. It was a choice about the kind of life we wanted and we just went forward, making due with the ebbs-and-flows of DH's single income. No way to guess what our net worth now might have been if we'd made different choices but I wouldn't really change anything, if I could.

Agreed 100%. That's what I meant when I made a separate comment about values. People prioritize what they value. In your opinion and mine, family is more important than money.

 

[Cheburashka]

They went with open enrollment here for schools about 20 years ago. Kid's don't automatically go to their neighborhood school anymore.

That's the distinct minority in the U.S. I believe you're in California, right? Most of the U.S. doesn't operate like California & NYC. Most public schools have geographically-based admission.

 

[mom2rtk]

You are very fortunate. Where we live private schools (not parochial) run start at $40k/year and go up from there, with virtually no chance at financial aid. A neighbor used to have 3 kids in private. He called it his "porsche a year" plan. Heck, there were preschools when DS was applying in NYC that were $40k, and that was years ago.

My kids go to public school, to be clear.

I think the range around that $300k estimate is huge. Families from the very poor to the very rich figure out how to make it work. So much of it comes down to how much you earn and how you choose to spend your money.

And where you choose to live.

 

[theMoreDisneytheBetter]

And where you choose to live.

Some jobs are (largely) tied to specific locations. If we go down this road we could have chosen different professions as well, but at some point that's water under the bridge.

 

[mom2rtk]

Some jobs are (largely) tied to specific locations. If we go down this road we could have chosen different professions as well, but at some point that's water under the bridge.

Still a choice. Higher paying jobs are often in higher cost of living areas.

 

[goofy4prez]

I haven't even begun to add up or think of all the costs of raising my only child who's now 24. Daycare, sports, music, medical costs, and of course the annual trips to WDW, and finally the incredible tuition of a small private college that she chose to attend. In hindsight, it was all worth it and would do it all over again today. She means the world to her mother and me. We have truly been blessed with great careers that have rewarded us for all the commitment, effort, and hard work. It has been a blessing to see her grow up and have a great start on her own path in life.

 

[sheilafri]

Agreed 100%. That's what I meant when I made a separate comment about values. People prioritize what they value. In your opinion and mine, family is more important than money.

I visited my childless (married late in life) SIL’s multimillion $ second home which was lovely. I asked my husband why we didn’t have something like that. He replied that it was because we had three kids. I’ll keep the kids.

 

[goofy4prez]

Agreed 100%. That's what I meant when I made a separate comment about values. People prioritize what they value. In your opinion and mine, family is more important than money.

Spot on and truth. I would sacrifice all I have and live in a cardboard box under a bridge if it meant giving my child a better life.

 

[TLSnell1981]

....

You are very fortunate. Where we live private schools (not parochial) run start at $40k/year and go up from there, with virtually no chance at financial aid. A neighbor used to have 3 kids in private. He called it his "porsche a year" plan. Heck, there were preschools when DS was applying in NYC that were $40k, and that was years ago.

My kids go to public school, to be clear.

I think the range around that $300k estimate is huge. Families from the very poor to the very rich figure out how to make it work. So much of it comes down to how much you earn and how you choose to spend your money.

Public schools are not a good option for us. Thankfully basic tuition for lower elementary is about $15k per year Summer and after school activities run another $4800. about half your average.

 

[tvguy]

That's the distinct minority in the U.S. I believe you're in California, right? Most of the U.S. doesn't operate like California & NYC. Most public schools have geographically-based admission.

Actually, NBC Nightly News did a story last night on the teacher shortage and more districts across the nation are adding open enrollment as a way to ease that problem.

 

[tvguy]

Wow it's like the opposite here--you have to go with your local school system and some of them have lottery systems so that you could end up at ANY school within the district, even if you live right next to a different one. Luckily ours isn't like that and we can go to our closest one.

Yes, they do have lotteries here too because various schools have special focuses that parents want their kids to be able to take advantage of. They have one "Fundamental" High School, one "IB" High school and a "Culinary" High School.

 

[QueenIsabella]

Yes, they do have lotteries here too because various schools have special focuses that parents want their kids to be able to take advantage of. They have one "Fundamental" High School, one "IB" High school and a "Culinary" High School.

We have that, too, but it's not by lottery--you have to apply to attend a school other than your "home" school. Luckily for us, both our (HS-aged while we lived here) kids wanted our assigned school--it offers IB, and dual-enrollment, which were the two "tracks" my younger two chose.

Going to the early college high schools requires a strict application process, with deadlines starting in October of the 8th grade year. Everything else is done later in the school year. And to get accepted to, say, the IB program at our HS, someone else has to choose to give up a spot in our HS to go elsewhere. They give preference to students who have a parent who works at their chosen HS (and, if that's the case, you don't have to be in a specialty program). If an "outside" kid comes to do IB, and then drops out of IB, they have to transfer back to their "home" high school.

 

[tvguy]

That's the distinct minority in the U.S. I believe you're in California, right? Most of the U.S. doesn't operate like California & NYC. Most public schools have geographically-based admission.

Actually, it must now be much more than a distinct minority. I say that because Little League Baseball used to require players join the league within whose borders they live. Drove us nuts on the Little League Board because we had parents whose children went to school at the school next to our fields, but lived 2 school districts way so we couldn't allow it. About five years ago Little League changed the residency rule to kids can play in the league they live in, or in the league their school is in. I suspect the growing trend of open enrollment may be the reason.

EDIT: Apparently attending schools outside your assigned school are options in all 50 states. https://schoolchoiceweek.com/public-school-transfer/

 

[EilonwyWanderer]

Yes, they do have lotteries here too because various schools have special focuses that parents want their kids to be able to take advantage of. They have one "Fundamental" High School, one "IB" High school and a "Culinary" High School.

The lotteries here aren't voluntary. Say you live in District A and they have 6 grade schools. When your child enters school they hold a lottery and assign you randomly to a school. Could be the one next door, could be the one 20 minutes or more away. Most places just do it by district depending on what road you live on you're assigned that school.

 

[barkley]

Yes, they do have lotteries here too because various schools have special focuses that parents want their kids to be able to take advantage of. They have one "Fundamental" High School, one "IB" High school and a "Culinary" High School.

are those schools within individual districts and limited to only the residents of that districts? within individual counties and limited to only residents of that county? if they are outside a student's district or county does the parent pay any extra levies/bonds that the district/county it resides in may have passed to support those programs (but are not collected in their student's home district/county)? i know that was a HUGE issue when we lived there on prohibiting out of district transfers let alone out of county (HUGE variance on school funding at the local level for those extras).

 

[mjkacmom]

People in their 20's today are no poorer than people in their 20's were 100 years ago. What has changed are people's values.

The cost of college is definitely affecting how poor this generation is, look at the student loan data. College costs have increased by 169% since the 80’s.. My oldest is 26, she says none of her friends plan on buying homes, she’s been with her boyfriend for 6+ years, no talk of marriage. Only a couple if her friends are married, none have children, they’d rather pay rent for a tiny apartment in a vibrant city than pay a mortgage, it’s cheaper and more fun. One bedrooms in my area start at $1400 a month so they are okay having roommates.

 

[barkley]

The cost of college is definitely affecting how poor this generation is, look at the student loan data. College costs have increased by 169% since the 80’s.. My oldest is 26, she says none of her friends plan on buying homes, she’s been with her boyfriend for 6+ years, no talk of marriage. Only a couple if her friends are married, none have children, they’d rather pay rent for a tiny apartment in a vibrant city than pay a mortgage, it’s cheaper and more fun. One bedrooms in my area start at $1400 a month so they are okay having roommates.

what i see with my kid's peers (27/25) is that many of them all too clearly recall the fallout of the last housing market crash and recession. they recall the impact on their parents, friend's parents and their own lives. the 'forever homeowner' dream was not the reality they grew up in. many saw their parents lose their homes or lose their jobs and were left stuck with a home they couldn't give away. some are still seeing the ramifications within their families-they had to move to other areas for work but were left with those homes they couldn't get out from under which resulted in foreclosures tanking their credit for decades to come. with the pandemic and people having to look for jobs they could continue to work with the shutdowns the younger ones are feeling like it's better to have the flexibility to be able to pull up stakes and move to greener (or at least not such decimated) pastures. i can't say as i blame them.