Child-free, but not by choice?

Hi, all! I just wanted to post as I am starting my first cycle with Clomid tomorrow. After all this time I feel like I am putting all my faith in this drug to work but I am not totally naive. I have a ton of friends (on line and in real life) that tried Clomid for 3 months or longer without success.

I'll be sure to keep you posted!

Missie
 
Thank you! I'd love (in a perfect world) to see positive results this first month but I know better.

:) As I was getting started on this journey, people kept telling me stories of this friend/relative/co-worker who got pregnant on their first cycle with a fertility clinic.

Unfortunately, I have a mathematical mind and these stories just led me to think that to get an average of 6-7 cycles for success many other people had to take a lot longer. Now that I'm one of the "longer" statistics, those stories are just depressing.

That said, I hope you get to be one of the lucky ones. Given that your doc told you your charts show ovulation, clomid is likely to produce multiple follicles which will increase chances too.

A question for others: when does it make sense to give up on IUI and move on to IVF? (Yes, technically, I am currently waiting out the luteal phase for my last IUI and I could get lucky. But, my sense of hope has gone way down.) R Dog Walt has spoken about the diagnostic uses of IVF. Plus, the chances go way up. But, I'm a full-time student and the cost is rather prohibitive.
 

:) As I was getting started on this journey, people kept telling me stories of this friend/relative/co-worker who got pregnant on their first cycle with a fertility clinic.

Unfortunately, I have a mathematical mind and these stories just led me to think that to get an average of 6-7 cycles for success many other people had to take a lot longer. Now that I'm one of the "longer" statistics, those stories are just depressing.

That said, I hope you get to be one of the lucky ones. Given that your doc told you your charts show ovulation, clomid is likely to produce multiple follicles which will increase chances too.

A question for others: when does it make sense to give up on IUI and move on to IVF? (Yes, technically, I am currently waiting out the luteal phase for my last IUI and I could get lucky. But, my sense of hope has gone way down.) R Dog Walt has spoken about the diagnostic uses of IVF. Plus, the chances go way up. But, I'm a full-time student and the cost is rather prohibitive.

Thanks again! I am very anxious to see how my chart pattern is this month. I am wondering if it will be different or not.

How many IUI's have you done? Has your RE given you an estimate of how many IUI's they'd want to try before transferring to IVF?

Good luck this month! I hope that you will get your BFP!

Missie
 
How many IUI's have you done? Has your RE given you an estimate of how many IUI's they'd want to try before transferring to IVF?

I've now done 6 IUIs. 3 without drugs, then a break and an appointment to discuss the next step. 3 with serophene. If I'm not pregnant this time, I have an appointment for next month to discuss the next step.

One of the other doctors suggested that I should consider injectibles (but continue using IUI). But, I have been reading a bunch of stats sheets and the injectibles don't seem to improve odds of success. The doc said that they make it easier to monitor the cycle and provide more control over the ovulation. But, I ovulate naturally. So, the serophene is already making some pretty good follicles. The idea behind superovulation is that creating more follicles increases the chances of success. Yet, the success stats don't seem to support that theory.

So, I'm thinking that if I'm going to take injectibles (I'm terrified of needles, ovidrel once/month has been bad enough), then I'm wondering if I should skip the superovulation level and go straight to IVF.

(Btw, if you have problems with side effects with clomid, ask for serophene next time. Although they are the same drug and supposed to be the same chemical configuration, most people have worse side effects with the generic. Plus, according to my clinic's pharmacist, the brand-name is actually cheaper than the generic. Other pharmacists always seem surprised that I'm insisting on the brand-name, but the price has always been better than for the generic.)
 
Missie- I hope that the Clomid does the trick for you. I think you are wise to be realistic about maybe not getting your BFP this month, but you never know. This could be what works for you!! I hope so. :thumbsup2

hematite153- You're right. I have talked about the diagnostic abilities of IVF. Personally, I always did great with my IUI cycles. I did injectables, and I responded well to the drugs, ovulated, the whole nine yards. However, until we did the IVF, I didn't know that my real problem was egg quality. That said, 99.9% of women don't have the horrific egg quality issues that I have either so moving to IVF which may not give you any more answers may not be the best step for everyone. KWIM?

I read this statistic somewhere that the first 4 IUIs have a certain success rate independent of each other. At my RE's office, it was about 30% with injectables (at least before I brought down the averages!). However, after 4 IUIs I read that the success rate begins to go down. I'm sure if I got out my statistics book, I could give a techical name to this phenomenon.

Moving to IVF is a huge decision and a particularly huge financial one if you don't have insurance. We didn't have insurance, however we were fortunate enough to SOMEHOW have our insurance pay for our IUIs. They were clearly not covered, but I guess the billing person at our RE's office coded them so they were paid for. I NEVER called the insurance company to ask. Had they not been paid for there was NO way we could have done 6 and then still done IVF. We wouldn't have the money.

As for the money, we had to take out a HELOC to pay for the cycle. I could see especially with being a full-time student that spending this kind of money on just ONE chance that, unfortunately, may not work could be difficult.

I think you are wise to look critically at the injectables. Especially without insurance, the meds themselves can be very expensive. We had some coverage on the drugs, but still the copay for Follistim was close to $300 per month. We were also paying $300 per month for donor sperm so the cycle could get expensive even with the "magic" coverage of the cycle. If the rates aren't any better at your clinic with injectables, and you respond well to the Clomid, I don't see any reason to spend the money on injectables while doing IUIs.

BTW- the needles aren't so bad. I'm not a fan of them, but after 6 IUI cycles, 2 IVF cycles, and one FET cycle all using needles, I got over my fear.

Well, I'm not sure I said anything of value here, but I certainly wish you luck with whatever you decide. I'll be curious to hear what your doctor has to say when you talk to him next month. And, maybe this IUI cycle will work out! Wouldn't that be great? :woohoo:
 
/
I read this statistic somewhere that the first 4 IUIs have a certain success rate independent of each other. At my RE's office, it was about 30% with injectables (at least before I brought down the averages!). However, after 4 IUIs I read that the success rate begins to go down. I'm sure if I got out my statistics book, I could give a techical name to this phenomenon.

Intriguing. I suspect it's connected to people most likely getting pregnant within that time-span. My doc and my clinic like to change the treatment plan after 3 cycles because they have found that things generally work within 3 cycles or don't work. Yes, they do sometimes work with continued persistance but with much lower probability.

Edit: Oh! It's called a positive skew, right?

Moving to IVF is a huge decision and a particularly huge financial one if you don't have insurance. ...We were also paying $300 per month for donor sperm...

Yep. Although I'd be thrilled to get donor sperm for only $300/month! (Once we pay for the more expensive "Canadian compliant" donors, pay all of the "middle men" required to get sperm from an American company and all of the documentation fees it gets closer to $900/month!)

Of course, I do get government coverage for all of the ultrasounds, bloodwork, etc. associated with both IUI and IVF. So, IVF ought to only run us about $6000-$8000. But, that's still a LOT of money!

I think you are wise to look critically at the injectables.
BTW- the needles aren't so bad.

I'm also concerned about the impact on my body. With serophene/clomid they say that 51% has been excreted 5 days after you stop taking it but there is still evidence of it in your system 6 weeks later. So, doing back-to-back cycles does lead to drug build-up but it's not too extreme. Taking a month or two off generally works for most. (My DW has continued to have the mood swings and depression that started with the clomid and it's now been a year since she last took it. These kinds of things worry me because she's not the only person I know who reports continued problems with fertility drug side-effects.)

But, the warnings on injectables are much more extreme. My clinic won't let you do back-to-back cycles because they consider it dangerous and they monitor for side-effects during the "off" cycles because of the high incidence of cyst development. Given that my mother had ovarian cancer, taking drugs with such a high incidence of problems seems like something I should limit. Hence, my thinking about IVF. I mean, if I can triple my odds of success per incidence of dangerous drugs it seems like something worth spending money for.

Well, I'm not sure I said anything of value here, but I certainly wish you luck with whatever you decide. I'll be curious to hear what your doctor has to say when you talk to her next month. And, maybe this IUI cycle will work out! Wouldn't that be great? :woohoo:

Thanks for your thoughts. I'm trying to gather as much information as possible-even if it is just the ideas of those who've been there.

I had a serious run of nausea earlier today and was having trouble regulating my body-temperature even though it wasn't that hot out. I was showing symptoms of heat exhaustion and heat stroke after being outside for an hour even though I have spent much longer outdoors in greater heat this year. I'm trying not to get too hopeful about these symptoms, but I can't help it! I have a whole week before I can know....

Btw, how are things with you? Didn't you have an ultrasound scheduled? How did it go?
 
Btw, how are things with you? Didn't you have an ultrasound scheduled? How did it go?

Thanks for asking. Well, I had one incidence of bleeding at 5w5d which FREAKED us out! DP and I were out of town on top of it. My RE wanted me to start taking progesterone in oil shots right away. Try finding those in small town Indiana at 9 p.m.

Turns out the bleeding was okay. When I got back to town, my RE did an ultrasound and everything looked fine with my TWO sacks! We were thrilled. I went on bed rest for a week until the next ultrasound.

So last week, we had another ultrasound and saw both hearts beating away. I got released from the RE's office, and I'm waiting for my OB appointment which is next Friday (August 3rd).

I'm 8w4d days today and still very nervous, but cautiously optimistic. I can't wait until the 2nd trimester- where I'm sure I'll still be nervous. I'm EXHAUSTED (2 hour naps are a daily necessity). Luckily, I haven't had much nausea- only when I don't eat frequently- so that's good news too.

I can't believe your donor sperm costs are so much!!! WOW! That plays into the equation too. The less sperm you can use the better (for multiple reasons- :rotfl2:) And since your mother had ovarian cancer, I agree that the less you are on the drugs the better. I have no family history, but since I've been on so much estrogen in these cycles, I'm definitely going to get a mammogram as soon as I can even though I'm only 31.

I'm hoping your nausea is a good sign...
 
Thanks for asking. Well, I had one incidence of bleeding at 5w5d which FREAKED us out! DP and I were out of town on top of it. My RE wanted me to start taking progesterone in oil shots right away. Try finding those in small town Indiana at 9 p.m.

Turns out the bleeding was okay. When I got back to town, my RE did an ultrasound and everything looked fine with my TWO sacks! We were thrilled. I went on bed rest for a week until the next ultrasound.

Wow, that does sound really scary. I'm glad it turned out okay.

Two sacks is exciting too! (I used to think I didn't want twins...my DW's father is an identical twin so we talked about the possibility and what we'd do...but, now, twins would be absolutely fabulous!)

Good luck! I'll keep thinking about you and keep my fingers crossed that your nervousness lasts for 60 years--I'm told it never goes away.
 
When I got back to town, my RE did an ultrasound and everything looked fine with my TWO sacks! We were thrilled. I went on bed rest for a week until the next ultrasound.

That is SOOOOO exciting!! I am so happy for you and your DP and will keep all FOUR of you in my prayers and positive thoughts. :grouphug:

Missie
 
Thanks for asking. Well, I had one incidence of bleeding at 5w5d which FREAKED us out! DP and I were out of town on top of it. My RE wanted me to start taking progesterone in oil shots right away. Try finding those in small town Indiana at 9 p.m.

Turns out the bleeding was okay. When I got back to town, my RE did an ultrasound and everything looked fine with my TWO sacks! We were thrilled. I went on bed rest for a week until the next ultrasound.

So last week, we had another ultrasound and saw both hearts beating away. I got released from the RE's office, and I'm waiting for my OB appointment which is next Friday (August 3rd).

I'm 8w4d days today and still very nervous, but cautiously optimistic. I can't wait until the 2nd trimester- where I'm sure I'll still be nervous. I'm EXHAUSTED (2 hour naps are a daily necessity). Luckily, I haven't had much nausea- only when I don't eat frequently- so that's good news too.

I can't believe your donor sperm costs are so much!!! WOW! That plays into the equation too. The less sperm you can use the better (for multiple reasons- :rotfl2:) And since your mother had ovarian cancer, I agree that the less you are on the drugs the better. I have no family history, but since I've been on so much estrogen in these cycles, I'm definitely going to get a mammogram as soon as I can even though I'm only 31.

I'm hoping your nausea is a good sign...



OH WOW :cool1: :woohoo: :banana: :cheer2: , I am so excited for you, how lucky. I was wondering if you were ever going to update us. I was really beginning to worry since I hadn't seen anything.

I will get back later and catch up on everybody else, but I have been having a heck of a time lately. I will also share about what has been going on with me, because I really need a shoulder right now.

Suzanne princess:
 
I will get back later and catch up on everybody else, but I have been having a heck of a time lately. I will also share about what has been going on with me, because I really need a shoulder right now.

Suzanne princess:

Hugs Suzanne! I hope everything is ok although if you need a shoulder than it probably isn't. :grouphug:

Missie
 
My eye caught the title of this thread as I was scanning the forums to see if anything looked interesting.
I too suffered for many years with unexplained infertility. I had 4 miscarriages and lots of bills for the meds, procedures, etc.
My fondest wish was that someday, I too would go to Disney with my children! One of my worst moments was when I booked a vacation to Disney after one of the miscarriages and I received something in the mail from Disney that said "You have not really seen Disney until you have seen it through the eyes of a child". I was heartbroken and thought I would die. To me, it was a horrible mistake when I clearly had reservations for 2 adults ONLY. Of course it was their marketing, but it hit me hard.

I had a few years of struggling with the adoption system here, and then finally decided to adopt from China.

This worked for me. I am a Mom now to 2 girls. We will be going to Disney in September.
Good luck to you all - my heart goes out to you.

-Wendy
 
The doctor's office finally called me back today (after I called them Monday and Tuesday to schedule the HSG). Another doctor in the practice will be doing the HSG and he is going to be on vacation when they'd want me to do it so I have to wait until next cycle.

I'm not going to lie....I am a little bit upset about it. I was hoping to get it done during this first cycle of Clomid. There isn't anything I can do about it though so I can just wait until the next cycle starts.

Missie
 
Hugs Suzanne! I hope everything is ok although if you need a shoulder than it probably isn't. :grouphug:

Missie



Hi everybody,

Sorry, I haven't been around much lately. I will have to share everything this weekend that has been going on, but I just wanted to check in and see how everyone is doing and to say I AM GOING BACK TO WDW IN DECEMBER. I can't seem to stay away, but you know, it has been the best thing to keep my mind busy. I am finally back on my regular schedule at work Yipee :cool1:.

Mom bought me a pair of lime green/hot pink Croc flip flops this weekend, and they are soooo comfortable, I went back and bought an all black pair. I can't wait to try them out at the World in 21 days. I wouldn't normally wear flip flops to walk that much, but I have rented a scooter so I will probably only wear tennis shoes the night of the P&PP at MK. We have decided to go to MGM on Thursday, Epcot on Friday during the day and then the P&PP Friday night. I am getting really excited and I can't believe I haven't told DH about the surprise birthday breakfast at O'hana, but I am sticking to my guns . I told my mom and BF at work so I can keep it a secret from him.

Any OKW DVC owners in the group? If so can you tell me a little about the resort and if there are any requests I need to make for mom with arthritis and 2 scooters. I have already requested a tub seat that mom needs. Any help is appreciated.

Have a great afternoon,

Suzanne princess:
 
Hi Everyone,

Wow - I have been on the disney boards for a long time but never saw this topic - it is very near and dear to my heart.....we have been married for 13 years, and cant seem to conceive - went to an RE once, but he was very harsh about my weight, and that was it for me - I dont like doctors at all, and if they are just going to make comments about my weight then the heck with them!! So now Im afraid to go back to a doc!!

I would love to adopt, but cant convince DH that we should do it NOW!!!

I love Disney, and many times we go with our cousins who have kids who love us alot and we love them too, so we get lots of kiddie attention - sometimes though when somebody thinks Im one of the kids moms, I practically break down - ugh!!!

Anyway, I'd love to get to know you all!

Wendy:grouphug:
 
Hi Everyone,

Wow - I have been on the disney boards for a long time but never saw this topic - it is very near and dear to my heart.....we have been married for 13 years, and cant seem to conceive - went to an RE once, but he was very harsh about my weight, and that was it for me - I dont like doctors at all, and if they are just going to make comments about my weight then the heck with them!! So now Im afraid to go back to a doc!!

I would love to adopt, but cant convince DH that we should do it NOW!!!

I love Disney, and many times we go with our cousins who have kids who love us alot and we love them too, so we get lots of kiddie attention - sometimes though when somebody thinks Im one of the kids moms, I practically break down - ugh!!!

Anyway, I'd love to get to know you all!

Wendy:grouphug:



Welcome and hugs to you :hug:. I can completely understand what you are saying. I am exactly where you are. Now, my doctor hasn't said anything about my weight, except that it should have nothing to do with being able to conceive. I see an unbelievable amount of women come in to the hospital where I work that are extremely overweight and pregnant, and I think why not me.

I am iffy on the adoption thing myself. It is just so unbelievable expensive and I personally don't understand why it has to be. I won't share my other feelings about it much because it might offend someone and I am not here to do that. I really need all the support these great women have given me.

Each one of us here has a different story, but yours sounds so incredibly like my own, it is weird. We can really lean on each other here and talk about alot of things other than TTCing, which I have given up on, since it has been 5 years. We would love to have you join us.

Suzanne princess:
 
I want to start off with saying I've been where you all are. BUT dont give up hope thats all I ask. Hubby and I have been married 20 yrs.. we tried for 5 yrs to have children when we first got married. Nothing. Went to through fertility drugs, nothing. Did double fertility drugs and hormones, still nothing. Many drs later and then We went thru 3 specialists and all 3 said to us ... we're sorry we dont know why but you'll never have children. The fertility drugs just arent working. So after many tearful nights, years. We brought ourselves to realize children werent in our future. Spoiled the nieces and nephews as much as we could and treated them like they were our own and cried when we'd get home that it wasnt us. Well the moral of this story is dont ever give up hope and dont always believe what a Dr tells you. We are the proud parents of a 14.5 daughter and a 7 yr old son. The years of fertility drugs and appts never worked but somehow years later I found myself pregnant. I do want to say never give up hope, keep your spirits high.
 
Hi!

Suzanne, I just want to thank you for that warm welcome - its hard to believe that there is somebody out there just like me - thank you thank you for sharing....right now my cousin (who has 6 other kids and is heavy and woman at my work who is also very heavy are both PG!) is PG again, and I couldnt explain the feelings I had when she told me the other day - why cant I just have 1???

Debbie - wow, you have the gift of encouragement! what a story to share! DH and I are coming up on 14 years in October, and my 40th bday is in Dec - I feel like we are running out of time! But I just keep praying - thank you for sharing your story too!!!

What a great place to be - thank you all!
 













Receive up to $1,000 in Onboard Credit and a Gift Basket!
That’s right — when you book your Disney Cruise with Dreams Unlimited Travel, you’ll receive incredible shipboard credits to spend during your vacation!
CLICK HERE







New Posts







DIS Facebook DIS youtube DIS Instagram DIS Pinterest

Back
Top