Ccd?

[java]

We are Catholic and my kids attend CCD. 75 minutes once a week. Oldest is at 7:45 AM Sunday and my middle is at 10AM.

Today I was informed by the head of ccd that there will now be MANDATORY masses every third Sunday.

Now while in theory I don't have an issue with this- (we actually prefer Saturday evening mass) but I do have an issue with them TELLING me I HAVE to go then. I am not a child. And I don't like being told what to do.

But it's their parish. And I suppose the ccd program can do whatever they feel like.

Am I over-reacting? No biggie and just suck it up and go when they tell me to. Or do I convert?

 

[mjkacmom]

Our church doesn't do this, but my gf's church has mandatory weekly Mass during sacrament years - they priest signs a paper at Mass. I guess they can do what they want, and I know they get frustrated when kids come to ccd, and then don't attend Mass (especially when they leave and get into vehicles instead of walking across the street for our 10:30 family Mass). If you attend Saturday night Mass, I'd just let the priest know.

 

[stm61]

they've tried that several places we've lived. They always end up dropping it when the parents either switch churches or pull the kid out of ccd. Once it hits their pocketbook they usually drop it very quickly. If you go on Sat. nights maybe you can just have the priest sign a bulletin or something then. One church was so out of control with it they made kids bring in a bulletin from another church if they were out of town on Sun. I don't think you're over-reacting at all. We no longer attend a Catholic church because I got tired of all the "you have to do this because we say you do" attitudes. It usually was not the priest that starts it, it's usually the person we called the CCD Nazi lol.

 

[Mickey'snewestfan]

I'm not Catholic, so maybe this wouldn't apply, but I think there's something to be said for being able to discuss the specific service with the kids. That is, to talk about the bible readings or the sermon or something. I know at my mom's church (big enough to have multiple services) different priests preach at different ones, so if you wanted to be able to discuss the sermon you'd need to have all the kids at the same service. Maybe they have a legitimate reason such as that?

I have to say, though, that 7:45 on Sunday morning would be enough to get me to convert, I wouldn't be sticking around to find out whether or not mass is required.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

Our CCD mandates weekly atttendance at Mass for parents and children (whether it's a sacrament year or not).

The priest is militant about it, and it's turned a lot of people off.

 

[Mickey's Minion]

We are Catholic and my kids attend CCD. 75 minutes once a week. Oldest is at 7:45 AM Sunday and my middle is at 10AM.

Today I was informed by the head of ccd that there will now be MANDATORY masses every third Sunday.

Now while in theory I don't have an issue with this- (we actually prefer Saturday evening mass) but I do have an issue with them TELLING me I HAVE to go then. I am not a child. And I don't like being told what to do.

But it's their parish. And I suppose the ccd program can do whatever they feel like.

Am I over-reacting? No biggie and just suck it up and go when they tell me to. Or do I convert?

I guess I don't see it as any different than any other organization that has mandatory attendance policies.

I would love it if some of my kids' sports were only a 75 minute a week commitment. But there are weekend tournaments and mandatory practices during the week. 75 minutes wouldn't even cover a single practice.

On one travel team, there are frequent mandatory parent meetings to discuss away tournament plans, mush the same as your Mass commitment - every three weeks. If the parent doesn't attend, the kid doesn't play and nobody questions it. In fact, most parents are excited and enthusiastic about having to attend the meetings. They wear the team colors, t-shirts, and some are over-the-top giddy with excitement.

Most parents wouldn't blink an eye at a mandatory attendance policy for a kid's sport, so I don't see any difference in a mandatory mass policy for a church. Why would church be so different than sports? If a parent is excited about supporting attendance policies for their kid's sports teams, I can't understand why they wouldn't be supportive of attendance policies of their other activities. Although, I can't see parishioners blowing air horns and waving pom poms during mass.

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

If mass was mandatory, we would be going somewhere else.

My kids both attend CCD at 9am on Sundays. Sometimes we attend church sometimes not.

The other church we attended had a CCD rule, if you missed more than 5 classes, you couldn't go on to the next grade.

We moved and this church isn't strict in the least bit, which I love.

 

[okeydokey]

Why would you send your kids to CCD if you didn't want to attend mass?

 

[kacaju]

I guess I don't see it as any different than any other organization that has mandatory attendance policies.

I would love it if some of my kids' sports were only a 75 minute a week commitment. But there are weekend tournaments and mandatory practices during the week. 75 minutes wouldn't even cover a single practice.

On one travel team, there are frequent mandatory parent meetings to discuss away tournament plans, about the same as your parish commitment - every three weeks. If the parent doesn't attend, the kid doesn't play and nobody questions it. In fact, most parents are excited and enthusiastic about having to attend the meetings. They wear the team colors, t-shirts, and some are over-the-top giddy with excitement.

Most parents wouldn't blink an eye at a mandatory attendance policy for a kid's sport, so I don't see any difference in a mandatory mass policy for a church. Why is sports so different than church?

I agree

 

[jfoofj]

I grew up Catholic, went to Catholic schools, and stopped going to church as soon as I could make that decision on my own. I was married the first time in the church, and had to jumpt through hoops to do that (I really didn't care if I was married in the church or not, but there was a lot of family pressure... I was 23 and didn't know how to stand up to my family.)

I don't currently attend any church, and my 8 year old doesn't either. He knows about God, Heaven, etc and that we should always treat others as we want to be treated, BUT I have been so turned off by the Catholic Church that if I were to start going back to any church it wouldn't be a Catholic one. My son has actually voiced interest in going to church, and I am at a loss as to what to do.

The priest who married my ex husband and I was SO difficult to deal with and ran his CCD program the same way. He refused to baptise my exH's new baby because exH and I didn't have our marriage annuled, and exH married his new wife by a JP. This was the church exH grew up in. He was so mad, he never went back to church. You would think that the Catholic church would be trying to get new members, not turning them away. A few years later this priest was disgraced in a scandal (not having to do w/ children, he was caught in a compromising situation w/ another man) so it seemed so hypocritical to me that he forced others to follow rules so diligently when he couldn't do it himself.

All in all, OP, you need to do what is best for your family. Maybe look into a nearby parish that doesn't have as strict a policy for attending Sunday mass.

 

[minniebeth]

Why would you send your kids to CCD if you didn't want to attend mass?

I agree with this in theory.

 

[Mickey'snewestfan]

Why would you send your kids to CCD if you didn't want to attend mass?

I don't think she said she didn't want to attend mass. She said that they expect her children to attend at a specific time, and she prefers that they attend with her at a preferred time, specifically Saturday evening.

 

[PammyK]

Why would you send your kids to CCD if you didn't want to attend mass?

I feel so sorry for children whose parents place them in this awkward situation.

Originally Posted by Mickey's Minion
I guess I don't see it as any different than any other organization that has mandatory attendance policies.

I would love it if some of my kids' sports were only a 75 minute a week commitment. But there are weekend tournaments and mandatory practices during the week. 75 minutes wouldn't even cover a single practice.

On one travel team, there are frequent mandatory parent meetings to discuss away tournament plans, about the same as your parish commitment - every three weeks. If the parent doesn't attend, the kid doesn't play and nobody questions it. In fact, most parents are excited and enthusiastic about having to attend the meetings. They wear the team colors, t-shirts, and some are over-the-top giddy with excitement.

Most parents wouldn't blink an eye at a mandatory attendance policy for a kid's sport, so I don't see any difference in a mandatory mass policy for a church. Why is sports so different than church?

Placing sports above Mass is such a sad attitude but an all too common one.

As far as the OP though, it seems like their family is actually attending weekly Sunday Mass (or in their case the Saturday evening vigil Mass) but will now be required to attend a different Mass one a month. I can kind of see why the religious ed program would want to do this, however, I think it would serve the parish community better to give the kids an attendance card at the beginning of the program year and have one of the CCD teachers at each Mass with a stamp that the kids need to get on the card every week. This way you know the kids are attending Mass but you aren't forcing the family to change their normal schedules to attend a specific Mass. The kids could also bring the attendance card if they go on vacation and get the priest from the out of town parish to sign it.

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

Why would you send your kids to CCD if you didn't want to attend mass?

Don't know if this is directed to me or not. I was raised Catholic, DH was not. I am raising my kids Catholic, because I believe they should have some sort of religion in their lives. I myself have some issues with the Catholic church, so like I said sometimes we attend mass sometimes not.

I attended church every week when I was young as well as attended a Catholic school. I want my kids to receive all their sacraments and to do so, they must attend CCD,

I did not like th priest at our last church. This church seems alot more kid friendly and parishioner friendly then our last one. So we are attending mass more often than we used to.

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

I feel so sorry for children whose parents place them in this awkward situation.


.

What situation?

 

[PammyK]

What situation?

The situation of parents sending their children to CCD and having them receive the sacraments without having a real intention or understanding of supporting the sacramental responsibilities they are placing on their child.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Honestly--I wish more required it.

A parent who doesn't go to mass or sends their child to Sunday school instead of mass while they go is doing a great disservice to their child's faith. There are parents who do this.

I tought 3rd grade last year and you can really tell who does and doesn't go to mass by the odd looks you get when discussing specific aspects of the mass.

Sending your child to an arbitrary class once per week is not raising your child in any faith. It's providing them a babysitter for an hour.

I tought for just the one year b/c I was so disillusioned by the parents who were more interested in checking off their "obligation" to send the child to religious ed than they were in actually educating their child.

It certainly is their choice, but I find it nonsensical and it the child isn't really learning squat if they don't see the mass regularly.

It's like teaching math mathematics without a child ever doing the math problems. It won't stick.

Folks may have their reasons, but in my experience, I have yet hear a valid reason for consistently not going to mass of any kind while sending your kid to Sunday school.

 

[rie'smom]

My daughter attended Catholic school from K-8. Now she's in public school. In order to be confirmed she would have to attend classes for 3 years. Confirmation is making a committment to remain a Catholic. Many parents and kids treat it as just another ceremony. My daughter is not attending the CCD class. When she's older and decides if she wants to remain Catholic, she can do it through the RICA classes. To me, it's too big a deal to be treated lightly.

 

[Mickey's Minion]

Honestly--I wish more required it.

A parent who doesn't go to mass or sends their child to Sunday school instead of mass while they go is doing a great disservice to their child's faith. There are parents who do this.

I tought 3rd grade last year and you can really tell who does and doesn't go to mass by the odd looks you get when discussing specific aspects of the mass.

Sending your child to an arbitrary class once per week is not raising your child in any faith. It's providing them a babysitter for an hour.

I tought for just the one year b/c I was so disillusioned by the parents who were more interested in checking off their "obligation" to send the child to religious ed than they were in actually educating their child.

It certainly is their choice, but I find it nonsensical and it the child isn't really learning squat if they don't see the mass regularly.

It's like teaching math mathematics without a child ever doing the math problems. It won't stick.

Folks may have their reasons, but in my experience, I have yet hear a valid reason for consistently not going to mass of any kind while sending your kid to Sunday school.

That's true.

But in defense of the OP, as others have pointed out, she does go to Mass. It is just Saturday evenings instead of the mandatory Sunday morning.

However, since they are only asking for one Sunday every three weeks, I don't see this as an unreasonable request.

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

The situation of parents sending their children to CCD and having them receive the sacraments without having a real intention or understanding of supporting the sacramental responsibilities they are placing on their child.

Kids don't have to attend church every week to have a full understanding of their faith. You many think otherwise, but this is my belief.

My strict Catholic upbringing is one of the reasons I rebel now as an adult. I want my kids to have an understanding of their faith which DS does, DD is just starting. Teaching faith can be done in numerous ways besides attending Sunday mass every week.

I'm not saying my kids never go to church, they do. DS used to go to Catholic school and it was required he attend mass every Friday and Sunday. But he also told me, mom why do we go to church every week just to hear people come and ask for money. In our other church it was missionaries, or the parish share, or other organizations taking up sermon time to ask for money. It turns you off after a while.

This church we attend now, seems to be different but I guess we'll see.