Ccd?

[Lisa loves Pooh]

I don't think she said she didn't want to attend mass. She said that they expect her children to attend at a specific time, and she prefers that they attend with her at a preferred time, specifically Saturday evening.

But in defense of the OP, as others have pointed out, she does go to Mass. It is just Saturday evenings instead of the mandatory Sunday morning.

I must have missed that part. A specific mass is ridiculous. Mass times are offered in abundance for a reason. And with some exceptions are virtually identical in liturgy, homily, and song.

I would suspect that their way of making sure everyone goes is to have them going at the same time.

Our church monitors attendance of the parochial school with the giving envelopes--you do not have to put money in, but that is how they know you go. I was put off by that, but I homeschool so it isn't a concern.

It would seem that folks within a religion want to do the least amount possible in order to keep their religious label and it is beyond my comprehension.

I would elaborate, but we may be entering taboo territory.

If OP attends mass---requiring a specific mass b/c there are bad apples who don't go and need that level of monitoring is rather unfortunate of her parish.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Kids don't have to attend church every week to have a full understanding of their faith. You many think otherwise, but this is my belief.

My strict Catholic upbringing is one of the reasons I rebel now as an adult. I want my kids to have an understanding of their faith which DS does, DD is just starting. Teaching faith can be done in numerous ways besides attending Sunday mass every week.

I don't think it is strict at all. Our faith is more than just Bible study. It is living it and celebrating on a weekly basis what Christ did for us.

I homeschool my children and use a homeschool religious ed and they go to Sunday school to spend time with other children.

I spend maybe--10--20 minutes a day TOPS with my children on the subject (no more than 90 minutes a week). We are not strict--by any stretch. But the religious ed component is what explains what the mass is about.

It is all meaningless out of practice.

Teaching faith can be done multiple ways, but the lax approach to avoiding church 50 weeks out of the year and sending your child to religious ed part-time (very few show up every week--I had one kid last year who didn't come to half of the classes)--is not a good approach.

There is a happy medium between daily rosary, mass, confession while going to CCD and the polar opposite which is sending your child to CCD to check off that parental baptism promise while doing nothing else to nurture your child's spiritual growth.

What that is--I don't know, but the argument that you don't need to go to mass misses a huge aspect of our faith.

And I am not tooting my own horn--but I do not do anything spectacular with my children as I am not a cradle catholic and am still in my own spiritual development. But it is pretty sad that with what little she knows--and without me prompting her ahead of time, she knew most of the answers to discussion questions throughout the year while all I drew from the rest of my class was blank stares.

I had 3rd graders who didn't know basic elements of the mass including some who were a bit lost on the Eucharist and its meaning despited having just completed their first communion. Evidently taking communion in 2nd grade and on Christmas and Easter isn't enough to cement the meaning into their memory.

Parents are free to catechise to their children as they wish. I just don't understand why they waste their child's time in a class that bores them to tears b/c they have no use for it in their real life application.

I hope that doesn't sound "strict" and "rule following"--but one has to ask themselves, why they are bothering to do something if they don't truly live what they are studying?

ETA: I didn't see your money comment. When we moved to our community, we got that vibe your son experienced from the first church we attended. So we didn't bother going again and instead chose a different parish. The first one--quite truthfully--felt nothing like a mass and more like a televangelist telethon. Very surreal.

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

I don't think it is strict at all. Our faith is more than just Bible study. It is living it and celebrating on a weekly basis what Christ did for us.

I homeschool my children and use a homeschool religious ed and they go to Sunday school to spend time with other children.

I spend maybe--10--20 minutes a day TOPS with my children on the subject (no more than 90 minutes a week). We are not strict--by any stretch. But the religious ed component is what explains what the mass is about.

It is all meaningless out of practice.

Teaching faith can be done multiple ways, but the lax approach to avoiding church 50 weeks out of the year and sending your child to religious ed part-time (very few show up every week--I had one kid last year who didn't come to half of the classes)--is not a good approach.

There is a happy medium between daily rosary, mass, confession while going to CCD and the polar opposite which is sending your child to CCD to check off that parental baptism promise while doing nothing else to nurture your child's spiritual growth.

What that is--I don't know, but the argument that you don't need to go to mass misses a huge aspect of our faith.

And I am not tooting my own horn--but I do not do anything spectacular with my children as I am not a cradle catholic and am still in my own spiritual development. But it is pretty sad that with what little she knows--and without me prompting her ahead of time, she knew most of the answers to discussion questions throughout the year while all I drew from the rest of my class was blank stares.

I had 3rd graders who didn't know basic elements of the mass including some who were a bit lost on the Eucharist and its meaning despited having just completed their first communion. Evidently taking communion in 2nd grade and on Christmas and Easter isn't enough to cement the meaning into their memory.

Parents are free to catechise to their children as they wish. I just don't understand why they waste their child's time in a class that bores them to tears b/c they have no use for it in their real life application.

I hope that doesn't sound "strict" and "rule following"--but one has to ask themselves, why they are bothering to do something if they don't truly live what they are studying?

ETA: I didn't see your money comment. When we moved to our community, we got that vibe your son experienced from the first church we attended. So we didn't bother going again and instead chose a different parish. The first one--quite truthfully--felt nothing like a mass and more like a televangelist telethon. Very surreal.

I understand what you're saying about only going to church twice a year and totally agree with you. We don't attend church every week but we do go usualy about once every other week.

We usually attend the early mass on Christmas Eve at the church we used to attend. Its a 4pm mass and fits into our Christmas schedule to put it plainly. Its almost like being in a circus. You have to get there at least 45 minutes before mass starts to get a seat, then with people talking, babies crying and we won't even mentioned how we're squeezed in like sardines, its almost a joke. We tried other masses and they are a little better but not much.

DH said last year, since we go to church during the rest of the year, we should be able to skip Christmas and Easter. Two years ago we left half way through mass. I couldn't even hear the priest.

 

[clh2]

We are Catholic and my kids attend CCD. 75 minutes once a week. Oldest is at 7:45 AM Sunday and my middle is at 10AM.

Today I was informed by the head of ccd that there will now be MANDATORY masses every third Sunday.

Now while in theory I don't have an issue with this- (we actually prefer Saturday evening mass) but I do have an issue with them TELLING me I HAVE to go then. I am not a child. And I don't like being told what to do.

But it's their parish. And I suppose the ccd program can do whatever they feel like.

Am I over-reacting? No biggie and just suck it up and go when they tell me to. Or do I convert?

No - I do not think you are over-reacting. We specifically like one of the services our church offers, our church has 4 services on a typicaly weekend, all with the same message, but each service is different. We like the one with the "contemporary songs", not the ones with the traditional pipe-organ sound.

Is there any reason "this particular mass" is mandatory? I would specifically inquire if the 5:00 mass (i.e. on the 3rd weekend of the month) would fulfill that requirement.

 

[java]

The situation of parents sending their children to CCD and having them receive the sacraments without having a real intention or understanding of supporting the sacramental responsibilities they are placing on their child.

If you read what I wrote I said we go to mass on SATURDAY night- the 5PM mass.
They are now telling me every third Sunday I have to attend the 9AM mass. That's what is bothering me. It isn't our Priest doing this it's the CCD head. It's this HAVE TO attitude and I will tell you what to do I think that turns so many people off. Me included.

 

[PollyannaMom]

We are Catholic and my kids attend CCD. 75 minutes once a week. Oldest is at 7:45 AM Sunday and my middle is at 10AM.

Today I was informed by the head of ccd that there will now be MANDATORY masses every third Sunday.

Now while in theory I don't have an issue with this- (we actually prefer Saturday evening mass) but I do have an issue with them TELLING me I HAVE to go then. I am not a child. And I don't like being told what to do.

But it's their parish. And I suppose the ccd program can do whatever they feel like.

Am I over-reacting? No biggie and just suck it up and go when they tell me to. Or do I convert?

I wouldn't convert over it, but I might ask if you can simply verify your child's attendance another way. - Explain that you already DO go to Mass, but that in order for your whole family to go together, you go to the vigil Mass. At least here, they LOVE for families to attend together, and the Saturday readings are the same anyway, right? So it might not be a problem. (I expect they're really trying to real in people who NEVER go, so that their kids will get a sense of the order of the Mass, etc. for class, and the habit of attending.) I assistant teach 2nd grade here, and though we encourage our students to "bring" their parents, I don't fuss over which time slot.

 

[BeachGirlFLA]

I would guess that your pastor is going to get quite a few complaints about this from members of your parish. If it's the same priest (and I know a lot of parishes don't have more than one priest...the ones I grew up in are lucky and have two still), then the homily is most likely the same at both masses. Arbitrary rules are the main reason I grew away from the Catholic Church.

 

[Teacher510]

Just like you can't be a little pregnant you can't be sort of Catholic. Mass attendance is not an option for Catholics. That's not my opinion, it's a fact of the religion. Many Catholics today are only culturally Catholic and that is why many parishes feel the need to require Mass attendance as a requirement for CCD enrollment.
I agree that the OP should be able to attend the anticipated Mass on Saturday unless there are child or family-centered activities at the required Mass. The parish we belonged to when I was in early elementary school required students, both CCD and those in the parish school, to attend a children's mass in the church basement chapel and sit with their class. Of course that was way- back- when in the 60's!

 

[Disney Doll]

If you read what I wrote I said we go to mass on SATURDAY night- the 5PM mass.
They are now telling me every third Sunday I have to attend the 9AM mass. That's what is bothering me. It isn't our Priest doing this it's the CCD head. It's this HAVE TO attitude and I will tell you what to do I think that turns so many people off. Me included.

Well, the first thing I'd do is ask why?

Once you know why, your decision can be made based on that...

If you think her reason for requiring this is valid, then I guess you guys make the sacrifice and go to the different Mass every 3 weeks.

If you don't think it's valid, then I guess you find a different CCD program that is more to your liking.

 

[TiggerStac]

For my DS, we have to sign on his registration form that we understand that CCD and mass go hand and hand and that we will take him to mass weekly. But if they said you had to go to a particular mass everyweek, I think that would bother me. They offer 3 masses on the weekends and we can go to which works best for our schedule. There are 2 family masses that we need to attend, as it is a sacrament year and those are on Sundays. Other years there is one family mass per grade.

Thankfully our church offers a home school program and they let you home school your child. They understand children are involved in other things. If this didn't happen, either...my son wouldn't be participating in football or he wouldn't be going to CCD. I have his textbook already and his teacher will let me know what chapter to school him thru prior to starting with his class in November. We only meet every other week, so he will miss 3 classes total.

 

[DisneyMomx7]

If you read what I wrote I said we go to mass on SATURDAY night- the 5PM mass.
They are now telling me every third Sunday I have to attend the 9AM mass. That's what is bothering me. It isn't our Priest doing this it's the CCD head. It's this HAVE TO attitude and I will tell you what to do I think that turns so many people off. Me included.

The funny thing is my kids do go to Catholic school and no one is telling us which Mass we have to attend. Usually we go to the 11:00 Sunday Mass because they have a kids Mass, but one the weekends we have something else to do (like today we had oldest dd's belated baby shower) we went to Saturday early evening Mass. I wouldn't like it if someone was telling me which Mass I HAD to go to.

 

[okeydokey]

If you do go to mass anyway then I can't see why it would matter which service you went to, unless they are tailoring that specific mass to the kids in CCD classes and they want them to experience it as a group.

I do know people who skip church then sneak in at the end to drop their kids at CCD (ours is Sunday am after mass) and that I can't understand. My DH and I teach the baptism program and we have had people try to sign up while telling us they don't want to join the church and attend mass, just get their child baptized. My priest refuses them. He said if you baptize them and they have no intention of attending services you won't see them again until it's time for 1st communion, then confirmation. I mean, why bother really?

 

[JoanGirardi]

I really liked the sports analogy used by one of the previous posters---If they told you your kid's game was at a certain time you wouldn't try to get it changed, you'd attend at the time of the game. This is their announced attendance time for the CCD mass---Not every week, but once every three weeks. I'd think you could plan for it. That's my opinion, anyway, FWIW.

 

[mickaholic4077]

To the OP-I feel sad that you don't consider the parish YOUR parish. It is,you know.

 

[java]

To the OP-I feel sad that you don't consider the parish YOUR parish. It is,you know.

You are kind of correct. I was very involved in our old parish - when we lived in NY. I was in a folk group(played guitar) ran a youth group, sent my kids to the Catholic school(actually I only had one child then) But that one felt like home.

This one- not so much. I have tried to get involved. I went to our Priest offering to start a folk group- giving guitar lessons for free to those kids that might want to learn. He told me to speak with Miss. A. She runs the music. Well Miss A. wanted no part of it. We don't need that here is a direct quote from her. She runs a very old fashioned choir singing- her singing most of the mass. She doesn't go to the Saturday night mass. That was the one I was trying to organize something for.

But nope. I wasn't needed there.

And I will admit that bothered me. The older woman that runs the ccd program complains about teens not staying involved. I tried to offer some suggestions.

But it seems they would rather just complain about it. And no one will be willing to take on change.

So you are right in that it I don't feel like this is my parish. I don't get the warm fuzzy feeling. Unfortunately, where we live, is rural. They want you to attend the church that you are logistically closest to. Which is this church. I was told that it had to be our parish.

I am not going at this with the right heart. I know it. I just have to get over my attitude and keep plugging away at trying to change it.

Instead of forcing people to mass- try to find a way to make people want to come.

 

[georgina]

We usually attend the early mass on Christmas Eve at the church we used to attend. Its a 4pm mass and fits into our Christmas schedule to put it plainly. Its almost like being in a circus. You have to get there at least 45 minutes before mass starts to get a seat, then with people talking, babies crying and we won't even mentioned how we're squeezed in like sardines, its almost a joke. We tried other masses and they are a little better but not much.

DH said last year, since we go to church during the rest of the year, we should be able to skip Christmas and Easter. Two years ago we left half way through mass. I couldn't even hear the priest.

I understand what you mean about Christmas and Easter. Now that my kids are older, we go to the 10 PM Mass on Christmas Eve; it never gets too full. I can't imagine skipping on those days, although I will admit to missing other times!

My youngest is up for confirmation this year, and they want the confirmation kids to all go to the Sunday evening youth Mass and attend the youth group gathering afterward. This messes up my Sunday dinner and does not make me too happy, but we will endure for 4 months. Like someone earlier mentioned, we would do it if it was a sports event.

 

[JR6ooo4]

its all fundraising.

mikeeee

 

[georgina]

Well, in our case my contribution is charged to my credit card every month whether I am there or not, so it's not fund raising with me!

 

[BeachGirlFLA]

Java, they actually told you what parish you HAVE to be a member of? That's ridiculous, IMO.

 

[java]

Java, they actually told you what parish you HAVE to be a member of? That's ridiculous, IMO.

If we wanted to we could change to a local parish just not be members. In other words just go to mass there. Really I think it's a result of trying to keep our tiny church going. Our priest is a lovely man but I can't understand about 50% of what he says. And he's it. It's a one Priest Church. 3 masses on the weekends.

What a change from my NY parish- we had 4 masses on Saturday night alone. Then on Sunday- gosh there was the 7 the 9, 10, 10:15, 11, 11:45. Noon. 4 pm. 5 pm.(they had 2 locations so there could be 2 going on at the same time.)