Episode 10 – Living Like Kings & Dole Whip Dreams
We met back up with the kinfolk and departed the Magic Kingdom for our off-site motel. If my life depended on naming where it was that we stayed, or even where in Kissimmee it was located, I’m afraid I would become a partaker of glory. I remember that it consisted of three or four single-story buildings, that the front building housed the office and pool area, and that all the rooms had unobstructed parking lot views.
It was a simple, bare-bones, no-frills, we’re-only-here-to-sleep, bargain-budget, turn-on-the-lights-before-you-step-on-the-floor, please-ignore-the-police-chalk-outline luxury resort. But it had a bed and at that point in my life I needed a nap. (And a Xanax wouldn’t have killed me.)
My dad went to check in with the other family patriarchs, and left us all in the van. He of course neglected to leave the keys, so after about 30 seconds of un-air conditioned bliss, we all exited the vehicle to check out the digs.
Checking in took a long time. A REALLY long time. A “Should we go look and see if he drove back to the park without looking to see if there was actually anyone in the van with him?” long time. (Which knowing my dad, was not an entirely unlikely theory.) Finally he emerged with two sets of keys. Actual keys too, not those credit card blinky lights of doom which never open when I use them, but which always work perfectly for my wife. EVERY TIME.
As it turned out there was an issue with the reservation. My grandfather had reserved the lodging and had set it up under a group rate. Because it was a group rate, it had been pre-paid. One of the extended family members was unable to come down and thus we had an extra room that had already been paid for.
The long and short of it was that if they cancelled the extra room, they would lose the group rate, At the end of the day, it turned out that Pete and I were given the extra room. We were living like kings in our one star bachelor pad. Looking back I have to wonder how much of that was chance, and how much was planned.
You see, I had a problem when I was a teenager and its name was stinky foot. From the time I was 13, all through high school, my mom made me leave my shoes on the back porch at night and march straight to the shower before bed. (Our yard was the only one in the neighborhood that never had mosquitoes.) They were bad… beyond bad… foul in the utmost means of expression.
Yet my olfactory arsenal did not end with sullied sneakers, there was the OTHER issue. I was known to frequently shoot a Jimmy, spread the duck butter, fire a fizzler, pinch a pongu, float an air biscuit, lay an egg, cut the cheese, toot the trouser trumpet, burp in my britches, rip a raspberry, fan the southern breeze, in short, I was gassy.
My parents can claim that it was a reservation issue, but after the van ride and the Krystal incident, I’m not entirely convinced this wasn’t a planned separation. I somehow imagine that the thought of my feet marinating in Florida sunshine combined with the musical effects of eating out all week was more than my dear mother could handle.
But that’s just my personal theory.
Fortunately, I grew out of the nasty stinky-foot and as to the other unfortunate predication, well, we won’t go there.
And yes, I know. Tangent. But if you’re still here by Episode 10, you knew what you were signing up for.
After checking in, we spent a couple of hours at the motel before heading out for some food and shopping on the Kissimmee strip. This would become our daily routine. We would spend around 3-4 hours at the parks each morning, leave for lunch, do the motel/swim thing, eat dinner off site, then return to the parks for another 4-5 hours.
This first park day, we returned to the Magic Kingdom and pretty much stuck together for the rest of the evening. After again taking the ferry, I cast a hasty glance about in Town Square for surly bouncer-dude. He wasn’t there which probably meant he was busy interrogating some poor guy who dared wink at Snow White. We made our way over to Adventureland for a tasty treat, namely Dole Whip.
I was way more excited about the Dole Whip than a person should ever be. But I had good reason. Sixteen months before this trip, my grandfather had emergency open heart surgery and required a quadruple bypass. In the late ‘80s this was a MUCH more serious operation than it is now. (And having sat with many a family as they waited on loved ones, I can tell you it is still no cake walk.)
Following surgery, my grandfather was in ICU for 7 days, CCU for 5 days, and a regular hospital room for a couple of weeks. He had to have extensive physical therapy just to be able to walk normally.
When we got the call about the surgery and arrived at the hospital a few hours later, one of the doctors came out to brief the family. He advised us that the best case scenario would be that the surgery would extend my grandfather’s life another 5-7 years.
It was a sobering moment and a day I will never forget. My grandfather took it in stride and decided he was going to do everything he could do to push that number higher. He started on a STRICT diet and began exercising daily.
The Christmas prior to our trip, we all gathered at my grandparents’ house. Because of my grandfather’s new diet, it was a bit of a different feast than we were used to.
At the time, there was a truck stop near their home that sold Vanilla and Chocolate Dole Whip, and every afternoon that we were there, my grandfather took us over for some, as it was pretty much the only dessert he could have. (Being that it is non-dairy.) That Christmas, we were all amazed to see just how well my grandfather was doing, and cherished the time we had together. We began to believe that maybe he would beat the odds and have more time than what the doctors thought.
When I read in Birnbaum’s Guide that they served Dole Whip at the Magic Kingdom, I couldn’t wait to bring my grandfather over for some. Because of his diet, eating on vacation was especially difficult for him. He was excited to find out that it was pineapple, as he had only had vanilla and chocolate to choose from before.
Eating our treats as a family, we were all thankful for this moment. We cherished it as a gift from God and celebrated the time we had been given as a family. That moment comes to mind whenever I think about that side of the park and it is now one of my favorite Magic Kingdom memories.
As it turns out, my grandfather did defeat the odds and he now lives about 25 minutes from my house. His five to seven year prognosis is currently in its twentieth year.
The next time I find myself in the Magic Kingdom, I plan to stop in Adventureland, grab a large Dole Whip, and thank God for the blessings He has poured out on my life.
Coming up in episode 11 - Jungles, Trees, Caves and BEEEEEES!
I can't imagine.
I think it's just a regional thing--Krystal's is really popular in TN and I can honestly say they have never given me heartburn! probably built up a tolerance over the years.
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I'm eager to post that one. I may break down and slip it in early. 
I'm very close to Tampa and we like to vie for that title, thank you very much. 
Wow. Just, wow.
