Would you tell your 6th grader the truth about Santa?

[babytrees]

So did I. Tooth Fairy too.

I wanted to ask my mom about the other *S* word - but I was embarrased to ask. And she goes "What is it about? Santa?"

Horrified I replied "What about Santa?!?!"

So i found about *S*, Santa, Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy all in one night. It was pretty traumatic. The night my childhood died.

But - on that note. I tried to tell my... I think he was 9, or 8 at the time about Santa. I was afraid of him getting teased, too. He started to cry and called me a liar! So, then I felt so bad, I said "Im just kidding!"

By the next Christmas, he knew on his own. *phew!*

And in your case, I bet you ANY money, she knows, and doesnt want to ruin the fun for you. Ive had TWO girlfriends kids, when the Mom's finally approached them about it say "We know! We didnt want to say anything - didnt want to ruin Christmas for YOU"

I did this with my oldest got all of those done with in one trauma inducing talk.

I thought for sure I'd have to have that talk this fall with my youngest (10) DD. But she still believes and I am going to let her!! At least until closer to the time that they go through s ed in class. I also don't want her going into middle school that naive, no reason to give the other kids a reason to tease her.

 

[Feralpeg]

DD (11 years old) still believes.....

My 45 year old sister who is single and childless yet knows everything about child rearing says this is ridiculous.

DH is also worried that she will get made fun of at middle school.....


What do you think? She has always been a bit of a dreamer and had her head in the clouds. Seems sad to have to tell her the reality.....

Thanks for your help.

DD was 12 before she stopped believing. She would question it in a way, but I'd always say "What do you think?" She'd tell me why she believed and I'd tell her it sounded logical. When she finally came straight out and asked me, it broke my heart. She told me to tell her the truth and I did. I could just see the sadness in her eyes. She wanted him to be real, but the kids at school talked it about it to the point that she couldn't ignore it.

OP, if your child is an only child, it is much easier for them to believe longer. I see nothing wrong with this. Let them have the magic. When it is time, she will let you know.

 

[Feralpeg]

Sorry.. double post.

 

[va32h]

One theme I keep seeing in this thread is "losing the magic" because you know about Santa.

I don't think that has to be so.

I haven't believed in Santa for a long, long, time, but I still love Christmas and still find it to be an exciting magical time. As another poster said, just like Disney...we know it's a show, but we can suspend our disbelief long enough to enjoy it.

If the magic of Christmas depends on believing in Santa, I just think that's sad. It does bode well for any adults, that's for sure.

 

[OkieDisney]

Hey! We didn't welcome my sister to the DIS!
DisWannabee! Howdy!!!!

Several have asked, no DD is not an only, we have another DD that is 9 almost 10 (they are 18 months apart

 

[DisneyfeverTN]

When my youngest DS was 9, he started asking Santa questions. When he was 10, he flat out asked me if there was a Santa. He said that his entire class had a discussion about it when the teacher left the room. When he asked me if I believed in Santa, I told him that it didn't matter what I believed. I told him it didn't matter what anyone else believed. He needs to decide for himself what to believe in and not let other people tell him how to believe. He thought about it and told me that he believed there was no Santa. That was that. He wasn't traumatized in the least.

 

[DISUNC]

DD (11 years old) still believes.....

My 45 year old sister who is single and childless yet knows everything about child rearing says this is ridiculous.

DH is also worried that she will get made fun of at middle school.....


What do you think? She has always been a bit of a dreamer and had her head in the clouds. Seems sad to have to tell her the reality.....

Thanks for your help.

This falls under the "If the child Don't Ask...Then Dont Tell" policy! It would be nice if MORE 11 years olds still believed!

 

[Cool-Beans]

When I was in the 4th grade, there was one girl left who still believed in Santa. She was made fun of so badly she cried.

I can't imagine any kid in 6th grade still believing, though. I bet the daughter is faking...is she one of those kids who gets all her gifts from Santa? One of my son's friends pretended to believe even up to 5th grade...he thought his parents would quit giving him gifts if he let on that he knew!

 

[Horseshoes]

I would tell her.

Better it comes from you than being told by classmates that are probably laughing about it.

Also, when my kids asked, they were maybe 3rd or 4th grade, at first I told them yes there was a Santa, but they kept insisting to know the truth. So when I told them no, they were "disappointed". We had special traditions too, like leaving the cookies and milk, and leaving reindeer food outside.

 

[casey49781]

My dd is 9, 4th grade, she came home and asked this year because some of the kids in her class said there was no santa, i told her that everyone has a right to there own opinion, or belief, and there is no way i am going to take that from her ,,,,she is only 9, they would rather find out on there own,,rather than someone tell them when there not sure......most kids stop at 10 yrs old,,,,,

 

[disneyfanforever]

I told my 9 year old this summer before he started school. He was starting a new school and I didn't want him to be embarrassed or teased at school. He seemed okay with it. I think he kind of suspected something was up. He is still definitely in the Christmas spirit, and I think he feels priviledged to be "in the know" when his little brother is not. He knows never tell his brother or anyone else. He said he was glad he heard it from me than from one of his friends.

 

[Mermaid02]

I haven't read all the replies but I told my ds who is almost 10. Most kids that age don't believe and frankly I didn't want him ridiculed in school... he really knew anyway, he said he just needed to hear me say it.

 

[shortbun]

11 and in middle school, I'd think they've had the discussion about Santa in a classroom somewhere. Many children's books discuss it. In any case, sad as it seems, I think you need to protect her from the mean kids in school and give her some insight. I drive a school bus. Kids can be truly brutal.

 

[MushyMushy]

When my oldest quit believing in Santa, it was no big deal. He took it well, especially because he's not very imaginative and is uncomfortable with fairy tale type of things.

DD, on the other hand, was a bit tougher. She's extremely flighty and creative and I thought it would be rough on her. When she finally came right out and asked me (around 10 years old), she was mad at me for lying to her all those years! I've heard adults who had that attitude, but I was so shocked to hear it from her. The whole year afterwards, she'd have these revelations like, "Oh THAT wasn't from Santa, it was from you????" and it would either be a good thing or a bad thing. Then the light would go off, "Oh, you knew I wanted that because YOU read my letters to Santa." It was funny.

Aside from that, she made the transition well. She just started writing lovely letters to me instead of Santa.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

I don't recall for my brother--but my mom considered by a certain time. It isn't socially normal and she didn't want him being made fun of should it be brought up. Not sure if he ever came to the conclusion first though.

But I would strongly consider educating her on the spirit of Christmas.

And maybe she's just playing along with her "belief".

 

[Barb D]

My kids have never believed in Santa (at least since they knew the difference between real and pretend at 4ish) and Christmas is still magical for them. We do PRETEND Santa, and tell them that it's fun to pretend. DD7 knows that her big brother is the tooth fairy, and when he teased her the other day that the tooth fairy wasn't going to bring her any money she yelled, "You're destroying the spirit of the tooth fairy!"

 

[ElevationNotice]

Santa's real.

 

[_19disnA]

.....and the OP's son would be 28 yrs old now..........LOL .............think he has figured it out.

 

[ElevationNotice]

.....and the OP's son would be 28 yrs old now..........LOL .............think he has figured it out.

No...Santa is real! =D

 

[GAN]

No...Santa is real! =D

Right …let me guess, you asked him to revive a 17-year old thread!