Would you leave a 9-year-old while you go on a ride?

[TJDisneymama]

I'm curious, for all the HELL, NOs........ what age WOULD you feel comfortable doing it? Just curious... I thought I was being overly helicopterish and that I would get mostly all "Yes, of course!", and honestly if she was 10, I wouldn't even be posting this thread b/c I would just assume that 10 is perfectly fine. But now seeing the "absolutely not"s, it's making me wonder what age you WOULD find it acceptable since it clearly sounds like 9 is not even CLOSE to an acceptable age for you????

I should have made this a poll.

 

[gtpoohbear]

Well...I put my 9yo DD on a plane by herself to go visit a friend from camp that I had never met. So, waiting a few minutes outside a ride at WDW would not have been a big deal at the time.

But, we are probably a little more "free range" in our parenting style than most. It really just comes down to what you are comfortable with. It certainly isn't unreasonable or neglectful though.

And it doesn't really seem fair to punish the older child for the decisions of the younger one. Unless of course, they are at "that age" and would actually rather go alone, lol.

I would probably go the chicken exit route, just because it's less time for her to be bored and lonely. If she stays right there, in a well lit area, probably within sight of multiple CMs, and with a cell phone, chances of anything going wrong are so miniscule that, at least for me, it's not even worth a second thought. The drive to the park is far riskier than that scenario.

 

[DWillowBay]

Only if you're willing to accept ANY of the natural consequences of leaving a 9 year old unattended in a large crowd of strangers.

 

[MakiraMarlena]

I'm not sure what the natural consequences are. It sounds like the above poster is anticipating that the child will likely be abducted or molested. The odds of that are extremely low and if the child can follow directions and knows what to do, that can be cut down even more. Some kids can handle it, some can't, it's up to the parent to know which their child is and act accordingly.

As noted by a previous poster, something CAN happen even to a child even when they are seated beside his or her family in a theater type attraction.

 

[JimmyV]

I think this is a bit oversimplified.

There's a whole myriad of feelings that a 9 year old and a 13 y/o could have on this subject, and it is very dependent on the individual child and the family dynamic.

See Post #25. Why is it so hard to comprehend that my post was based on personal observation and wasn't an attempt to project my views onto other people's kids?
Are people completely ignoring the preface:

You have asked what I would be comfortable with, so don't take this as me judging or preaching about others.

 

[Angel Ariel]

See Post #25. Why is it so hard to comprehend that my post was based on personal observation and wasn't an attempt to project my views onto other people's kids?
Are people completely ignoring the preface:

No, I didn't ignore your preface, and I'm not saying you are wrong for you either.

the portion of your post where you talked about a child's feeling was written using general terms. It's not uncommon for posts on these boards to start speaking specifically about themselves, and then move into a generalized statement. Given the wording, this is how your post read to me - that the no you wouldn't feel.comfortable with it yourself as a specific to you comment, and that the why you gave was more generalized, not speaking about your specific kids.

I was only providing another possible version for how kids could feel based on my own experience. Not discounting your post or ignoring you in any way.

 

[lroger01]

I haven't read ALLL the posts, so excuse me if this is a repeat. I would have the kidlet go through the line with you. After waiting in line she might just might decide to go on the ride. It might not be the first line she waits in, but by the third of fourth, she just might. All the chicken exits go into the same area the ride exits into - usually a gift shop. I'd just tell her to wander around the shop until you're done - but not leave it. I'd also be sure she has a cell phone with her.

For kids that are afraid to try something new boring is a good incentive. I had a friend's kid that was afraid of the water. She went to the pool with us nearly every day. I never made her go near the water or anything. She just sat in the shade and watched. By the end of the second week, she had her feet in by the steps, by the end of the summer she was playing in the shallow end. Scared is one thing, refusing to even try is another - make refusing boring.

 

[JimmyV]

I'm curious, for all the HELL, NOs........ what age WOULD you feel comfortable doing it? Just curious...

I find this to be a fairly simple equation, (but admit that others come out on the other side). If I have two kids, and want to engage in a behavior that is assured to result in me accompanying one child while leaving the other child unattended, I am going to accompany the child who is going to be in the unsupervised environment (i.e., "in the crowd") and allow the child in the "captive" environment, (i.e., the attraction) to be the one who is alone. Far fewer bad things can happen to the child in the captive environment than can happen to the child in the "free range" environment. I trust, (and I use this word loosely), the other guests who are riding the ride with my unattended child more than I trust the general public who would be surrounding my unattended child in the crowd. The guests on the ride are far more apt to appreciate that they are being watched and monitored by security cameras on the ride and are less likely to pose a threat. Guests who are milling about in the crowd? Not so much. This applies in each and every circumstance as long as the child who will be left unattended is old enough and mature enough to be unattended. Given Disney's age restriction for riding solo, this doesn't come into play. In other words, I would never accompany a 16 year old who didn't want to ride while letting a 7 year old ride solo. But Disney does not allow this, so the point is moot.

 

[JimmyV]

It's not uncommon for posts on these boards to start speaking specifically about themselves, and then move into a generalized statement.

Well, I wasn't doing that, and I was trying as hard as I could to make that clear.

 

[Angel Ariel]

Well, I wasn't doing that, and I was trying as hard as I could to make that clear.

Referring to "the child" as opposed to "my child" is what made it feel more generalized to me. Like I said I wasn't ignoring you, just offering another perspective on that line of thought. I didn't think that would be a problem. I am sorry that it was.

 

[bumbershoot]

By 9 years old, discussions about strangers should not be a new subject. A simple reminder should be sufficient. Since the majority of rides exit thru a gift shop, have her plant herself near one of the checkout counters where a CM is always stationed if it makes you feel better.

One truly hopes it's not the first conversation about it.

And yep, stand close enough to the CM spot so that she can ask for help if she needs it, and I see zero need to worry (given the OP's description of her 9 year old).

I don't know what Disney's rules about this is, but I know our local theme park allows the person who doesn't want to ride on the ride to wait in line with you and then cross over and wait near the exit but still inside the ride line for the rest of their party.

They don't have that setup at Disney rides.

I think it is important to understand Disney is not as safe as one would think.

As sorry as I am for your daughter's situation (and every time you have posted about it in the past I have felt the same), there is a massive difference between standing in a giftshop with lights ON and cameras everywhere and CMs surrounding you (possibly with a cellphone in your hand)....vs in a dark ride with stationary seating.

I can still remember the time my younger brother was lost for 2 hours because of a miscommunication as to the meeting spot. He was 16 at the time but it was before everyone had a cell phone. MK was closing and we couldn't find him. He was faithfully waiting in what he thought was the designated spot and so was my dad, just not the same spot!

Happened to me on my 8th grade DC trip. A friend and I still would swear that we were standing in the spot that they told us was the meetup spot, on Smithsonian day, but since everyone but us was at a different spot, I suppose we were not correct. But I still think they were all wrong. (and after waiting a certain amount of time we sought out a police officer in a police car, asked him for help, told him our bus number, and he helped us find our bus)

And it doesn't really seem fair to punish the older child for the decisions of the younger one.

As the oldest, I wholeheartedly agree.

 

[Love Tink]

I'm curious, for all the HELL, NOs........ what age WOULD you feel comfortable doing it? Just curious... I thought I was being overly helicopterish and that I would get mostly all "Yes, of course!", and honestly if she was 10, I wouldn't even be posting this thread b/c I would just assume that 10 is perfectly fine. But now seeing the "absolutely not"s, it's making me wonder what age you WOULD find it acceptable since it clearly sounds like 9 is not even CLOSE to an acceptable age for you????

There are people on here who find no age acceptable to leave their child - even high school kids. I'm not kidding.

I have seen multiple threads on here where women voraciously defend their refusal to let their male children use the men's bathroom by themselves. Sometimes these kids are well into puberty.

 

[famy27]

I find this to be a fairly simple equation, (but admit that others come out on the other side). If I have two kids, and want to engage in a behavior that is assured to result in me accompanying one child while leaving the other child unattended, I am going to accompany the child who is going to be in the unsupervised environment (i.e., "in the crowd") and allow the child in the "captive" environment, (i.e., the attraction) to be the one who is alone. Far fewer bad things can happen to the child in the captive environment than can happen to the child in the "free range" environment. I trust, (and I use this word loosely), the other guests who are riding the ride with my unattended child more than I trust the general public who would be surrounding my unattended child in the crowd. The guests on the ride are far more apt to appreciate that they are being watched and monitored by security cameras on the ride and are less likely to pose a threat. Guests who are milling about in the crowd? Not so much. This applies in each and every circumstance as long as the child who will be left unattended is old enough and mature enough to be unattended. Given Disney's age restriction for riding solo, this doesn't come into play. In other words, I would never accompany a 16 year old who didn't want to ride while letting a 7 year old ride solo. But Disney does not allow this, so the point is moot.

Actually, I think Disney does allow this. As long as the child is 7, they can ride alone. They don't call seven the age of reason for nothing

Up until a few years ago, WDW even allowed seven year olds into the park unattended. My DD was crushed that they changed the rule. I doubt that I would have allowed her to take the monorail to MK by herself, but Disney was okay with it. Now, you just have to walk in the gates with someone over 14. Once you pass the tapstiles, anyone seven and older can roam freely.

 

[JimmyV]

Actually, I think Disney does allow this. As long as the child is 7, they can ride alone.

Really?

http://land.allears.net/blogs/kristin-ford/2013/03/_in_less_than_two.html (from 2013).

Guests who are younger than 14 years old will be required to be accompanied by another guest who is at least 14 years old. The new policy goes into effect on March 23, 2013 and it applies to all gated attractions at Disney Parks in the United States.
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Currently, [2013], The Walt Disney Company ticket policy states that only guests younger than 7 years old have to be accompanied by someone 14 or older. This policy clearly is outdated, and a revision makes sense.

Has this been changed?

 

[kangamangus]

Percentage of kids who are abducted/sexually molested by someone they know....99.99999%. Unless I have an unknown enemy out there who is looking to take my kid I wouldn't even worry about these types of things. Worrying about them wearing a seatbelt when out with friends (yes) accidents are the leading cause of death for kiddos, eating healthy to prevent heart disease since 1 in 2 people die from this (yes) keeping them as confident as possible while setting limits to help prevent suicidal feelings (yes) suicide is the 3rd leading cause of death. The real worries in life people don't even think about...instead it's about the unknowns...the things you have no control over. As a previous poster pointed out....the kid who goes alone on the ride could be molested as well by a stranger in the dark. Teach your kids to yell "YOU ARE NOT MY MOM, YOU ARE NOT MY DAD" especially in a public place. My kids are all well versed in this activity. Give them the tools to feel confident they can handle the situation in the slight, minuet chance they may ever need it. But definitely teach them to wear their seatbelt. Because the odds of them being in a car accident are like 1 in 4 in their life.

 

[tarak]

To me it really depends on the child. My older child, no way would I have left them at 9! However, my younger one totally could handle it at 9-Pick a spot and have a Mickey Ice Cream bar. As a Disney parent, I would be happy to sit with a child while their parent and other child went on a ride, but that might be awkward for others. Some rides your 9 year old may be able to just wait at the exit for you. You all go through the line together and then instead of riding, your 9 year old just steps over to the exit and waits the 5 minutes until the ride is over.

I agree with this. You know your kids, so do what makes you comfortable. My oldest, I'd have had no problem having her wait at that age. My middle daughter, no. My son won't be nine until October. I'm not sure that even in six months would he be okay waiting by himself.

There are people on here who find no age acceptable to leave their child - even high school kids. I'm not kidding.

I have seen multiple threads on here where women voraciously defend their refusal to let their male children use the men's bathroom by themselves. Sometimes these kids are well into puberty.

Yes. The bathroom threads are painful and usually spiral out of control within a page or two.

 

[balletomane]

Percentage of kids who are abducted/sexually molested by someone they know....99.99999%. Unless I have an unknown enemy out there who is looking to take my kid I wouldn't even worry about these types of things. Worrying about them wearing a seatbelt when out with friends (yes) accidents are the leading cause of death for kiddos, eating healthy to prevent heart disease since 1 in 2 people die from this (yes) keeping them as confident as possible while setting limits to help prevent suicidal feelings (yes) suicide is the 3rd leading cause of death. The real worries in life people don't even think about...instead it's about the unknowns...the things you have no control over. As a previous poster pointed out....the kid who goes alone on the ride could be molested as well by a stranger in the dark. Teach your kids to yell "YOU ARE NOT MY MOM, YOU ARE NOT MY DAD" especially in a public place. My kids are all well versed in this activity. Give them the tools to feel confident they can handle the situation in the slight, minuet chance they may ever need it. But definitely teach them to wear their seatbelt. Because the odds of them being in a car accident are like 1 in 4 in their life.

Actually, abduction by a stranger to the victim is 24%. http://www.parents.com/kids/safety/stranger-safety/child-abduction-facts/. If the ride is more important, go for it.

 

[mjkacmom]

Really?

http://land.allears.net/blogs/kristin-ford/2013/03/_in_less_than_two.html (from 2013).


Has this been changed?

It's 14 to enter a park alone, 7 to ride alone. Can you imagine if yo had to be 14 to sit on a ride alone?!

 

[jacksonsmom]

I would have left my son at 9 yr old. But he is very independent and knows what to do in a situation. Having a cell phone would help too just in case there is an emergency.

I think as long as she knows the rules and will just sit and wait, she will be OK.

My son at 10 yrs old was walking across the parks to get paper FPs for us. He wanted to do that, and I felt comfortable enough letting him do that, and it gave him some independent. We have been going to the parks since he was 3 yrs old so I felt he had a good sense of where things were. We would just tell him what FP to get, and then come immediately back. He never ran into any issue all the times he did that.

But I am a big believer allowing your child to be independent and do things for themselves, if they are mature enough.
Now he has never gave me any reason to think he would not be OK just waiting or going across the park for some FPs, of course he is 16 yrs old now, so that is a moot point

But when he was younger, if I thought he couldn't handle just waiting then I would not let him.
If you think your daughter can handle it, then I see no issue with it. I know that is probably the minority thinking....

 

[revdon64]

No. But then you asked for what I'd do. What you do is on you.