What can you tell me about Boy Scouts/Tiger Cubs

[Beth76]

My son is in first grade and wants to join the Tiger Cubs at his school. I've always sort of been against the Boy Scouts because of the whole anti-gay thing. Do they still take that stance or have they relaxed a bit? What are some positive things about the boy scout organization? Should I let go of my feelings and let my son have a positive experience?

 

[LadyJeanPirateQueen]

I'm actually looking forward to when my son can join BS/Tiger Cubs or whatever it's called. BS get to do the coolest things.

I remember being in GS and being envious of my brother who was a BS. While we were busy learning how to co-ordinate outfits and arrange furniture (which has been REAL important as an adult let me tell ya ), he was building little wooden race cars and learning to tie knots. He learned how to put up a real tent while we slept in pre-erected tents on wooden platforms with twin sized cots. I was SO mad that only boys can be boy scouts, let me tell ya.

Ladyjean

 

[happy_redhead]

Hi Beth,

I'm the proud mom of 2 Cub Scouts.

For us, Scouting has been a very positive influence on my sons. Each week they attend den meetings and do crafts (boy oriented, of course!), play a game and sometimes make snacks. Every month has a different theme and all the activities usually center around that theme. We try to incorporate one of the important character traits that they need to learn into a game or activity. As a 3rd year Tiger Cub leader, It has been fun to watch how the boys grow throughout the year and become more independant and self confident.

The program builds upon itself. Each year gets progressively more challenging.

Try it for the first year, then re-evaluate your decision. We've never regretted starting Scouts. As for the gay thing....it's never even been mentioned.

 

[Acklander]

Beth-

We're in the same boat here, DS7 brought home a notice for boy/cub scouts and really wants to do it. (I suspect because his best friend does it) We've always shyed away from it because of the anti-gay thing. <sigh> I think they still have the ban on gay leaders. I guess we'll give it a try, but I'm not really comfortable with it.

 

[Beth76]

As for the gay thing....it's never even been mentioned.

Well, yeah, I would expect as much. I don't expect that they discuss homosexuality with the boys. I guess I'm more concerned with myself being a hypocrite by participating in an organization that discriminates against gays.

Thank you for your other comments. It does sound like something my son would enjoy.

 

[Dancin Desert]

As an Assistant Cub Master for a local Cub Scout pack (with one son just becoming a WEBLOS and the other a Tiger Cub), I have a few comments.

Tiger Cubs ... in all reality ... is a "play-date" on steroids. A parent/guardian (they call it "Akela" in Cub Scouts) is with the Tiger Cub at each Den Meeting. Tiger Cubs learn the VERY basics about actual Scouting during this time. They learn some discipline (the "buddy system", being respectful of adults and others, saluting the flag, saying The Pledge of Allegiance) but VERY little is done without parent/guardian involvement. They will probably go on at least one field trip as a den (again, with their "Akela").

As for the "gay thing"? At that age, it just isn't really a topic that is (or needs to be) discussed, other than for child safety purposes. I frankly have never heard it (the "gay thing") discussed during any den meetings. Concerning "gay leaders", I don't really have a comment, as this "topic" is - currently - not an issue in our Cub Scout Pack.

OP, I hope you give your son the chance. The following year (when he would be a "Wolf") is when the scout is allowed to do (at least in my opinion) some fun things and grow.

Best wishes.

Dave

 

[momof2inPA]

They get to go to day camp with the other scouts, shoot bb guns and arrows, carve wood, and play games. It's a good organization. All of the leaders in the two groups we have belonged to have been parents. I don't know why not having gay leaders is a big deal, I guess. It hasn't effected our dens/packs.

 

[Beth76]

Well, yeah, I would expect as much. I don't expect that they discuss homosexuality with the boys. I guess I'm more concerned with myself being a hypocrite by participating in an organization that discriminates against gays.

Again, I'm quoting myself about my concerns. I don't want them to discuss gays. I do not need my son to have a gay leader. My concern is, as a whole, the boy scout organization has discriminated against gays. I would imagine that's it's not even an issue in my community either. But it's still an issue with the organization.

And again, I appreciate the info what the kids do as it does sound like something my son would like.

 

[Mrs.Toad]

That's a tough decision. I'm not sure what I would do if I had a son, because I would also feel hypocritical to join a discriminatory organization.

I have a friend who leads her 9yo son's troop. She had the same concerns, but decided that at this age, it would be beneficial to her son. As he gets older and learns about the discrimination issue, she will let him decide whether he wants to stay with it or not.

Good luck with your decision.

 

[hoosll]

Boy Scouts was THE most important decision that we made for our son for the following reasons:

1. They teach good values!
2. Taught him to efriend and cooperate with other boys that he did not PICK to associate with - the group was picked for him, he had to find ways to make it work FOR him
3. We got to know the boys he was associating with and their parents through meetings and activities
4. He learned different kinds of leadership roles
5. He learned to camp and other skills not taught in school and that his father and I could not have taught him
6. He got to go to Philmont and hike and camp for a week and survived.

I have no regrets. As he got older, he did resist going and was embarassed to be seen in his uniform - he became an odd fish in a big fishbowl in high school - he came within 1 badge of eagle, it was his choice not to go for eagle.

Disappointment: the parents who feel it is a competition, or that their son MUST get eagle to get into the BEST college.

 

[Pooh's Pixie]

Hi Beth,


Try it for the first year, then re-evaluate your decision. We've never regretted starting Scouts. As for the gay thing....it's never even been mentioned.

I second this. I am a mon of 2 cub scouts, and I was a Tiger den leader last year, moving up to Wolf this year. It has been a great experience for us (me too!) The boys get so much out of it. I have had people ask me about the gay thing too. While I don't support the BSA stance on this, it has never had anything to do with our experience; never mentioned, never referred to in any way. I liken it to the Catholic church (or any church!): I am Catholic, but I don't agree with every single policy the church puts out. I am a Democrat, but I don't agree with everything (esp these days!) they put out. Does that make sense?

Also, our particular pack is one of the most diverse groups of people I know: racially, religiously, economically. I think it is very good for the kids.

Good luck!

 

[NCDisneyMom]

My ds was a Tiger Cub last year, going into the Wolf Den this year, for which I will be the Den Leader. I thought about the "anti-gay" issue before we signed up, but I decided that the Scouts teach more good things which outweigh it. If/when the time comes (when he is much older) that the gay issue in Scouts comes up, he will already know my stance on it, and he can make his own decision on it.

You see, I've got gay friends, all of which my son knows. No, at 7 years old, he doesn't understand that they are gay. We haven't brought it up, but when it comes up, we will discuss it openly with him. One of my very best friends in the whole world is a gay man. He and his partner were both Cub Scouts when they were younger, and they agree that it is a wonderful organization for boys. Of course they don't like the "anti-gay" stance, but they do think that the good far outweighs the bad. I hope that, if the issue comes up in the future, my son will see that my gay friends are no different than anybody else. Cub Scouts has been great for my son so far, and we have both had a great time with it. We can't wait to get started again this year!!!

 

[Stimpy]

Tiger Cubs ... in all reality ... is a "play-date" on steroids.
Dave

That is the funniest and truest statement I have ever seen about the Tigers

DH and I have been cub scout leaders going into our 3rd year. We started with the Tigers and moved up with them. This year we are doing the Bears with 15 boys. We usually have 2 den meetings a month, one outing a month and 1 Pack Night each month (all the levels in the Pack get together)

I understand where you are coming from on the "gay thing" because I also felt very uncomfortable about it. But the benefits so far at this age are very helpful to the boys. They learn alot of life skills, have gone to many places they probably wouldn't have, they've really become a team. We have 8 boys that we've had since 1st grade, all very different kids that probably wouldn't have been friends without scouts. I have seen the stronger popular boys defend the "weaker" ones that are picked on in other settings.

So far, nothing has ever come up relating to homosexuality in our Pack, so it's kind of a non-issue locally. But again, I realize what you are saying about it being an entire organization discriminating.

Quite honestly, I was more concerned about the emphasis they place on religion. They always have requirements to move on regarding teaching about God and beliefs, not really focusing on one religion over another but it still makes me uncomfortable discussing it with the kids. I don't feel it's my place to discuss and "teach" their religion to them, it's their parent's jobs....which is how I handle it. I tell the parents, they need to do those requirements at home with their son.

 

[Mrs.Toad]

Also, our particular pack is one of the most diverse groups of people I know: racially, religiously, economically.

This reminds me of something and I'm curious as to whether it's changed or not...

I remember the Boy Scouts being in the news a few years ago as having an issue with a boy who didn't believe in God not wanting to say God in the oath. I believe they said he couldn't be a Boy Scout if he wouldn't say the oath specifically as written. I don't remember how it was resolved.

In Girl Scouts, although God is included in the promise, leaders are told that girls may skip over that part or make substitutions based on their personal belief system.

How is Boy Scouts handling that now? I would guess that it varies by leader, some may not have an issue with it, and allow the boys to substitute other words without making a big deal of it. But if a leader wanted to make it an issue with a child, would BSA still support that?

 

[mm_ja]

Like several of the previous posters, the anti-gay stance has not (to my knowledge)e ever been an issue so I cant address that with any personal experience. I can relate my and my sons experience over the past year. He joined as a wolf scout last year and we had a blast together. As far as actual activities, the possibilities are endless. We have built the wooden race cars and rockets. We have gone camping and learned how to set up the tent, cook outdoors, gone hiking, fishing, shot bb guns, and the bow and arrow. Our pack was also involved in a community food drive at Thanksgiving and collecting Christmas trees for disposal. I watched my son grow in several ways, his sense of accomplishment and self confidence when he would receive his rank and electives badges were something he really needed. I think there is a good balance of activities that your son could earn recognition for between outdoor/sports activities and more indoor/education type activities. My DS has earned beltloops (an achievement award) for things such as weather, astronomy, science, chess, and art as well as Soccer, swimming, flag football, and bicycling. Additionally, all the good quality time I have been able to spend with him has been my best reward. Give it a try I think you will be pleasantly surprised.

 

[NHdisneylover]

My DD8 is not allowed to join boy scouts because of the of their stance on homosexulaity. I also am uncomfortable with how much emphasis they have on religion, but that would not be a deal breaker for us.

When he was 6 and brought home the note frmo school about packs starting up, we were completely upfront about our reasons for not letting him do this, and he was FINE with it (did not want to be in anything that the friend I used as an example could not be part of just because said friend loved another Daddy). I felt teaching him the lesson that one lives by one's convictions was much more important than anything socuting would teach him (not that boy scouts don't do a lot of great things, but we CAN get that elsewhere).

I did offer (and have offered every year since) to start a Campfire Kids or Baden-Powell troop if he wants to do scouting (especially as he has been tagging along with my dauighter's GS troop since he was 3). He does not want to, there are other things he wants to do with his spare time.

Oh, and by the way, to a previous poster on Girl Scouts: Not all GS troops do "girly" things. My daughter's troop (yep, I am the leader) is made up of very adventurous girls. They camp in tents, snow shoe, kayak, tie knots, take sailing lessons, use pocket knives, do science experiments, etc. At camporee they do end up in platform tents (all the large camps available in the area are set up this way--for boys or girls) but they do archery, ropes course, climb, canoe, etc. It is all in finding the right troop for the girl

 

[Pigeon]

As they are still anti-gay and anti-freedom from religion, there is no way I'd let my kids participate. It would be hypocritical of me, as those are important issues to our family.

There are several other organizations that provide similar types of experiences without those issues.

Our kids participate in Y-Adventure Guides. It's a blast. It's co-educational, and one parent of either gender gets involved. In our case, it's mostly the dads. It's much lower key than BSA, and involves much less BS. The kids go on camping trips several times a year and have projects to work on and monthly circle meetings.

 

[Colson39]

Eagle Scout here. I might be a bit biased, but the Boy Scouts is one of the greatest experiences of my life. Depends on what troop you get with, I was lucky to get with a good one. We went to Canada, to Philmont in New Mexico (the mecca of Scouting), the Keys, Disney group camping, summer camps in central Florida, Order of the Arrow trials, it was great.

I learned and loved every minute of it. Some of my best memories are from the boy scouts, and I look back on it as the highlight of my youth. I wouldn't give it up for anything.

I highly recommend the Boy Scouts to anyone who is interested. I know they got a lot of publicity because of the anti-gay thing, but to be honest, I never even once in my entire 4-5 years in the Boy Scouts ever once heard anything about gay or anti-gay. Don't believe all the hype, most of that was just news coverage and not reality.

 

[ckay87]

I've been active with Cub/Boy Scouts for 8 years, the past 4 as a Cub Scout Leader.

Remember that it's all about the leader - the leadership defines your son's experience. A lot of posters here refer to how "they" operate....remember that the "they" is YOU. The leadership of your pack or troop comes from the parents. Be a leader or become a chairperson of some sort and you can help shape your son's scouting experience. The BSA provides resources, but it largely hands-off.

 

[ckay87]

As they are still anti-gay and anti-freedom from religion, there is no way I'd let my kids participate.

How is that?