Since I started researching other

cruises for Alaska... I found the following on Cruise critic... it's their gathered tips for RC... Have fun reading... no irons and no laundry...

What a waste of a good party...
Yes, you can smuggle alcohol on board.
Yes, hump cabins are great. No, you dont hear noise from the elevators.
Yes, the ship may rock. The ocean is not under RCIs control. Some people get seasick
most dont.
Sometimes you can get a bathrobe if you ask.
The weather in the Caribbean in winter is good (despite forecasts of rain). Thats why we go there.
Choose the early seating if you have children. Stay home if they are under 2.
Yes, most ships have smoking areas. No, it wont bother you unless you sit there.
No, you cannot remove balcony dividers.
No, you cant skip the muster.
Yes,
Royal Caribbean customer service is a nightmare.
Bring duct tape, bungee cords, Ziploc bags, magnets, less clothes, more money.
Buy the drink of the day to save money.
There is a (slim) chance of being upgraded at the pier.
Yes, Chops and Portofinos are worth the extra $20.
Yes, people disappear from cruise ships, some on purpose I suspect.
You cant take a cruise and not have a good time.
OH, you forgot the long, boring, detailed description of soda cards/stickers/cups AND the fact that it's stealing to share.
THERE ARE NO IRONS ON ANY
RCCL SHIP
RCI does not owe you a refund of your cruise fare if a port is missed for reasons beyond their control....
Your baby/toddler/elderly parent cannot go in the pool even with swimmy diapers.
The Solariums are not for children except during certain hours during inclement weather.
RCI does not have a topless/nude sunbathing deck.
You can have "nookie" on your balcony, but sometimes other people can see you.
RCI does not have self-serve laundry or ironing facilities.
You can smuggle an iron onboard in you really want one.
The hair driers do not have much power.
Children under 3, even if potty-trained, are not allowed in Adventure Ocean.
RCI coffee does not taste like Starbuck's (or anything else drinkable!).
RCI does not serve lobster during formal night on 3 or 4 night cruises.
Quest is fun, but it's a secret why.
You can get a price reduction on your cruise if the price drops and isn't a happy hour special.
The ship does not wait for you if you are late boarding unless you are on an RC excursion.
You can get cash from the casino using your Sea Pass.
If you are a woman using your married name, sometimes they ask for your marriage certificate with your birth certificate, sometimes they don't. No one knows why. See above.
Sometimes the itineraries change without notice. Again, no one knows why.
Travel during hurricane season at your own risk. RC cannot control forces of nature (yet).
No candles
Yes, you can hear noise from your neighbors.
no, four adults cannot fit comfortably in an inside cabin
no, elevators do not get you from aft to forward
yes, RCI excursion have first tender priority
yes, carlos n charlies has reopened in Cozumel
cozumel, costa maya and grand cayman ports of call are often cancelled due to rough tendering conditions
tip your servers even if you eat in the Windjammer every day
keep your butt in your poolside lounger or let someone else use it
if you think no one's watching...there's probably a camera
yes, take your mints out of the bed before going to sleep
yes, check your account daily (especially if you have teens or a gambling spouse!)
no, sea lice, bed bugs, jellyfish, botfly, mosquitoes & sand fleas are probably not going to affect you
yes, tip your friendly bartender a little extra
no, the production shows are not Broadway quality
no, the food is not worthy of any Michelin stars, but you're not gonna starve
no, you're not going to find an authentic Picasso for $10 at the art auction
people can be rude...ignore them and focus on your own fun
if you sign up for your M&M, go to it!
no, you cannot fish from or barbeque on your balcony
if you get too drunk or spend too much money it is not the cruise line's fault
last but not least, remember the golden rule.
Only a Wonka-vator (Willie Wonka and The Chocolate Factory) can get you between fore & aft or between port & starboard. I don't think this cruise line has installed them yet on their ships
No jr. suites do not get perks....
No you cannot bring friends or relatives into the concierge lounge if they haven't booked a suite.
The concierge may or may not email or call you prior to the cruise to set up spa appointments etc - and no one knows why some get a call and some don't.
The pina coladas they "serve" in the windjammer on sail-a-way day are not free.
You can request a small table for your family or party....but there is no guarantee.
No the elevators DO NOT go from bow to stern (front and back) of the ship
Yes there is dry cleaning services
Yes there are ATM's BUT a very high sur-charge applies
Think twice about blowing into that Whistle on your Life Preserver
Yes they do connect beds to make a queen size bed
No you will not FALL through the cracks in between the 2 beds
Yes you can fall overboard (voluntarily or if you p...off someone maybe pushed)
Yes if you are Scottish or want to be it's ok to wear Kilts to the dining room (going commando is your choice)
Yes there is a Doctor and a Nurse on board
Yes you can order room service (Full Menu)
Depending where the ship is and who your carrier is, you might be able to use your cell phone.
You can use your laptop in your cabin, but it costs extra.
No you can't "Drive" the ship
Yes the ship has Auto-Pilot
Those funny things that help keep the boat stable, well they are called Stabilizers
Yes there are lots of Photographers on the Ship
Left Side of Ship is called PORT
Right Side of Ship is called STARBOARD
Rear of Ship is called AFT
Front of Ship is called BOW
* Most cruises will have lobster night
yes you can have more than one lobster
the lobster is not Maine lobster
The lobster is not as good as Maine lobster
The lobster is better than a Maine lobster
How does a lobster know that it is a Maine lobster if they are caught in Nova Scotia or Mass or RI or NH?
* Those of you with a balcony.
Even if you paid for your cruise and you will do as you please because it is your vacation..
You can not fly a kite off of the ship. The strings can disrupt the radar and you could end up in Cuba.. You may not be allowed back on.
You can not fish off of your balcony. The hooks do not feel good in your neighbors ear. A big lawsuit will come your way.
Please do not bring a blow up pool for your little one for your balcony. If you empty it overboard, be prepared for a not too friendly visit from your one deck down neighbor. Black eyes on formal night do not look good.
Don't sit on your balcony rail. A little "ship tip" and you will remember these words. They will be the last words you will remember.
* The captain also reserves the right to have rowdy passengers escorted from the ship.
Running in a speedo with a beer bucket on your head and screaming obscenties could qualify as rowdy.
* Again:
Travel insurance is an option
Please do not complain if, after being escorted from the ship in your speedo, you have to stand on the street corner in your first port using your beer bucket to solicit donations to get home. (on the good note, you won't have to take your shoes off at the airport)
* Yes there is a surcharge to eat at Johnny Rockets of $3.95. Does not include beverages. Take out is the same price.
No we don't care if you think that another line has better burgers for free!!!!!
* Not all ships have a Seaview Cafe, and on those that do the hours are limited - no amount of whining will make them open sooner.
...The captain has the right to change itineraries due to inclement weather.
...Be prepared for a riot if this happens.
...It is suggested that one purchase Travel insurance.
...If you don't, be prepared to eat the expenses when the Captain's changed itinerary affects your flights home.
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* You can not take drinks out of the Concierge Lounge. Most Concierges enforce this. Some people are, however, sneaky and pour their drinks from the glass into the cardboard coffee cups and take it out.
* You're fridge will fit 2 12-packs of soda. And the space under your desk will fit 5 more.
*Buy the drink of the day from the bar, and ask for a regular glass. You won'y pay extra for a souvenier glass
*Prebook your excursions on the RCCI website. You pre-pay for them, and can have them paid off before going on the trip. You also guarantee a spot (unless it's cancelled-then you get refund) and will get your tickets on board.
*RCCI excursions guarantee you the ship will be there if you're running late. We were in an airboat stuck in the swamp in Belize, and had no problems gettng back.
*If you like hitting the bar, find a good bartender, and remember him. A few bucks now and then will make the drinks stronger, and get you a free one occasionally. Most bartenders work one bar all day, then another one in the evening. They will remember you if you befirend them.
*Along with above tip, you can also ask for a shot of liquor for your coke cup before the Coke goes in. A perk for a bartender's loyal customer.
*The shower will fit 2 VERY close "friends", but you may hure yourself or the shower. No you aren't the first to try.....
*If you ask to dine with the captain, you will not. He generally dines in the main dining room on formal night and at the 2nd seating. The maitre d' looks for a table of varied ages who are not travelling together, yet are enjoing themselves and have continuous conversation. They also are dressed appropriately (no jeans, no t-shirts) on the evening they have to choose. They make sure that everyone dining with the captain will be seen as having a great time. It is as much for publicity as anything else. Yes, you get a special menu (which you will keep), a special invitation, and the only free photographs you will ever get from RCCI.
*If you ask the captain what the difference between a boat and a ship, he will answer: "You can put a boat in a ship, but you can't put a ship in a boat"
*After your trip, you will have sea legs. No the ground is not moving-it's you compensating from all the time on the ship.