TTC thread take 2

[HsvTeacher]

I'm just going to say it......I'll be glad when tomorrow is over. Not to begrudge any mom, but I just feel down.

My mom wants me to go with her to her church tomorrow.....they all know down there about our situation. They have this deal where they celebrate the oldest mom, youngest mom, and the one with the most kids. I'm just afraid it would be like rubbing it in my face. And the advice? No thank you. I don't want to hear, "It's not your time," or the ever popular, "Just relax." Espiecially since these people tend to be the ones who can get pregnant on a whim.

Maybe I'm silly about it, but that's how I feel. I may just go to work online tomorrow.

Gabbie

You're not being silly at all! I'm right there with you. DH and I have been TTC for eleven years, and I made the decision a few years ago not to go to church on Mother's Day. It just became too depressing, and I really don't want to hear all the insensitive comments that people feel the need to say to me.

We're celebrating tonight with my mom, because my parents are leaving tomorrow to stay with my younger DS and (not so dear)BIL until their baby arrives. She is due a week from today, so this Mother's Day is just a little bit more than I can handle. I'm looking forward to a low-key, quiet day tomorrow!

 

[Kennywife]

 

[tinytreasures]

Hugs to all my friends here.
I totally get you Gabbie. Mothers day is my least favorite day of the yr.

 

[D&DDisney]

Big hugs to everyone tomorrow.
Even though I've been a mom for 10 years this holiday still hurts. These damn scars run deep.

 

[DaisyLynn]

Hi

I've never posted on this thread. I am fairly quiet on these boards - me and DH have been privately TTC, with the help of my Dr.

This day is the hardest day of the year for me. I am scared to log onto Facebook, because I know that my feelings will be hurt. It is hard enough going there everyday and seeing baby pictures, talk of "mommy stuff", sonograms, etc. Today will be a bombard of momness! (I just made up a word ) At least I still have my sense of humor, even if my body makes me feel like less of a woman much of the time.

All that keeps running through my mind is one question I want to ask a mom..."what is it like to have a day all to yourself, where your role as 'mother' is celebrated?" What is THAT like? Is it like another birthday? Do you get flowers and gifts and cards and a special cake? For being a mom? What a blessing! You get to have all of the happiness, joy and unconditional love (and I'm sure some pain and suffering, but you wouldn't trade it for anything) that comes with being a mother, and then you get cake for it? Sign me up! If it were only that easy.

 

[HsvTeacher]

I posted yesterday about feeling overwhelmed this year. Well, my younger sister just had her baby at 8:46 this morning. So, she got an awesome Mother's Day gift! I got a visit from AF.

I've cried and cried this morning. I feel so horrible and guilty that I feel this way, but I can't help but feeling sorry for myself.

 

[Kennywife]

I decided to stay home and chillax. It's just another day for me.

We had a bbq for my mom yesterday. I pigged out and enjoyed the day. I'm staying off fb today too. Already told hubby not to chat with me on it since I won't be on it. Can't wait for this day to be over!

Gabbie

 

[joanne312]

Today sucks. Especially because I remember last year, the only thing that got me through Mothers Day was continuously telling myself that that was my LAST Mothers Day not being a Mom. So today is just even more of a reminder of how long we have been on this nightmarish journey.

I go back tomorrow for *hopefully* my final u/s prior to trigger shot. My body responded very slowly to the meds this cycle. On CD11 my lead follicle was only a 10. Luckily by CD13 I had some growth (had a 14, 13, 11, 10) so tomorrow CD15 I hope to have something close to maturity. And of course it doesn't help that all those follicles are on the left side, and I still have that blockage in my left tube RE says not to worry about it and that many people get pregnant with similar blockages, but I just don't have a good feeling about it.

 

[tink_n_pooh]

I have been feeling very sad lately as well. I guess Mother's Day was bothering me more than I should let it. It doesn't help when your MIL gives her daughter's MD gifts and me a different gift with a "you are not a mother" comment I'm sure she meant well with the gift but it doesn't help my mental health at all

 

[cherbear]

Gosh, sounds like everyone had a really rough "Childless Awareness day" yesterday!!

You're not being silly at all! I'm right there with you. DH and I have been TTC for eleven years, and I made the decision a few years ago not to go to church on Mother's Day. It just became too depressing, and I really don't want to hear all the insensitive comments that people feel the need to say to me.

We're celebrating tonight with my mom, because my parents are leaving tomorrow to stay with my younger DS and (not so dear)BIL until their baby arrives. She is due a week from today, so this Mother's Day is just a little bit more than I can handle. I'm looking forward to a low-key, quiet day tomorrow!

yeah totally not silly.

Man...11 years? There are just no words for that pain.

Hi

I've never posted on this thread. I am fairly quiet on these boards - me and DH have been privately TTC, with the help of my Dr.

This day is the hardest day of the year for me. I am scared to log onto Facebook, because I know that my feelings will be hurt. It is hard enough going there everyday and seeing baby pictures, talk of "mommy stuff", sonograms, etc. Today will be a bombard of momness! (I just made up a word ) At least I still have my sense of humor, even if my body makes me feel like less of a woman much of the time.

All that keeps running through my mind is one question I want to ask a mom..."what is it like to have a day all to yourself, where your role as 'mother' is celebrated?" What is THAT like? Is it like another birthday? Do you get flowers and gifts and cards and a special cake? For being a mom? What a blessing! You get to have all of the happiness, joy and unconditional love (and I'm sure some pain and suffering, but you wouldn't trade it for anything) that comes with being a mother, and then you get cake for it? Sign me up! If it were only that easy.

I am with you on FB. I thankfully missed most of the mother's day postings yesterday, as I did not log on til much later in the day.

I think everyone deserves a big one of these.

I would love nothing less than to be a mother...I don't even need a special day. As I'm sure we all feel here.

I posted yesterday about feeling overwhelmed this year. Well, my younger sister just had her baby at 8:46 this morning. So, she got an awesome Mother's Day gift! I got a visit from AF.

I've cried and cried this morning. I feel so horrible and guilty that I feel this way, but I can't help but feeling sorry for myself.

Oh sweetie, don't feel guilty for crying. You need to let that all out. 11 years ttc, your younger sister has her baby on mother's day, and you get none other but freaking AF??! I'm so sorry...God seems so cruel sometimes.

Today sucks. Especially because I remember last year, the only thing that got me through Mothers Day was continuously telling myself that that was my LAST Mothers Day not being a Mom. So today is just even more of a reminder of how long we have been on this nightmarish journey.

I go back tomorrow for *hopefully* my final u/s prior to trigger shot. My body responded very slowly to the meds this cycle. On CD11 my lead follicle was only a 10. Luckily by CD13 I had some growth (had a 14, 13, 11, 10) so tomorrow CD15 I hope to have something close to maturity. And of course it doesn't help that all those follicles are on the left side, and I still have that blockage in my left tube RE says not to worry about it and that many people get pregnant with similar blockages, but I just don't have a good feeling about it.

I keep saying it's going to be my last also.

I have been feeling very sad lately as well. I guess Mother's Day was bothering me more than I should let it. It doesn't help when your MIL gives her daughter's MD gifts and me a different gift with a "you are not a mother" comment I'm sure she meant well with the gift but it doesn't help my mental health at all

THAT stings. Ugh.

 

[dancin_princess]

I didn't know if I should post here or not. I'm not TTC yet but I do desire to be a mother. I feel like no one understands me. I have an ongoing fear that when it is time, I won't be able to. Yesterday was rough for me because just about all my friends are mothers. It makes me want to cry.

 

[joanne312]

I'm so frustrated right now. I love my RE's office. I really do. They came highly recommended by many people, and I know that my RE is very well known in my area. However, I feel like sometimes they are intentionally vague, which lead me to the point of insanity. I am an over-analyzer and a planner. So I have this blockage in my left tube which they are currently diagnosing as a hydrosalpinx. They haven't really given any information besides not to worry about it, and if we aren't successful this cycle then we will investigate it more. All my growing follicles (besides two 13s) are on the same side as this blockage. So I called the office and asked if they really think it's wise of us to do an IUI this month. The blockage is the biggest concern this month and IUI isn't going to help that. DH's SA is normal. The nurse called me back (a nurse I've never talked to before) and said that the RE wouldn't recommend it if he didn't think there was a chance of success. OK obviously there is a *chance* of success but is it worth spending an additional $800 on that *chance*!?!?! And I really want to know what the plan is going to be for this blockage if we aren't successful this month. All of my googling shows that hydrosalpinx needs to be taken care of prior to IVF (which we were hoping to move on to if this cycle didn't work out) and people also sometimes need to have tubes removed! I'm just a worrier and reading that I might have to have a tube removed freaks me out. I know it's just Dr. Google but still. This cycle has been such a roller coaster we were considering taking the summer off from TTC for a mental break. However, if I need to have surgery or something I want to get that done ASAP so we are OK to TTC again when we are ready.
OK I think I need to be done ranting! Thanks for listening, as always!

 

[HsvTeacher]

Oh sweetie, don't feel guilty for crying. You need to let that all out. 11 years ttc, your younger sister has her baby on mother's day, and you get none other but freaking AF??! I'm so sorry...God seems so cruel sometimes.

Thanks for making me feel less guilty about being upset. The last few days have been an emotional roller coaster!

 

[Falltime]

Hey Girls

Hope everyone is doing well. Cher how are you doing after the transfer? fingers crossed and prayers are being said for you!

I am in the 2WW will go in next Tues for the beta. I ended up having 2 mature follicles instead of 3 so I was glad about that. 3 was freaking me out. I am off to NYC this weekend. Excited about that as I have never been. DH is there already for work so I meeting him there then we are flying home together. Going to see the Mary Poppins Broadway show and catch a Yankees game while seeing the other major sites and museums and getting my first taste of NY pizza. Will see if I like it better than Chicago pizza but I doubt it LOL

 

[tink_n_pooh]

Hey Girls

Hope everyone is doing well. Cher how are you doing after the transfer? fingers crossed and prayers are being said for you!

I am in the 2WW will go in next Tues for the beta. I ended up having 2 mature follicles instead of 3 so I was glad about that. 3 was freaking me out. I am off to NYC this weekend. Excited about that as I have never been. DH is there already for work so I meeting him there then we are flying home together. Going to see the Mary Poppins Broadway show and catch a Yankees game while seeing the other major sites and museums and getting my first taste of NY pizza. Will see if I like it better than Chicago pizza but I doubt it LOL

Enjoy your first taste of real pizza, it's delicious!

Good luck!

 

[jenm2878]

Hi ladies. I've been keeping up reading here but I haven't posted since my miscarriage.

We have a plan, so I feel a little better about things. I think we're going to try for two months on our own, try for a month or two with clomid, and then try 2-3 IUI's with clomid. If none of that works, my RE says she'll discuss IVF with us. My DH and I decided we would give it a year from when we're allowed to start trying again. If I'm not pregnant then, we're going to adopt.

I hope all is well with you ladies. Here's to hoping we can all move over to the Moms to be thread soon!

 

[cherbear]

I'm so frustrated right now. I love my RE's office. I really do. They came highly recommended by many people, and I know that my RE is very well known in my area. However, I feel like sometimes they are intentionally vague, which lead me to the point of insanity. I am an over-analyzer and a planner. So I have this blockage in my left tube which they are currently diagnosing as a hydrosalpinx. They haven't really given any information besides not to worry about it, and if we aren't successful this cycle then we will investigate it more. All my growing follicles (besides two 13s) are on the same side as this blockage. So I called the office and asked if they really think it's wise of us to do an IUI this month. The blockage is the biggest concern this month and IUI isn't going to help that. DH's SA is normal. The nurse called me back (a nurse I've never talked to before) and said that the RE wouldn't recommend it if he didn't think there was a chance of success. OK obviously there is a *chance* of success but is it worth spending an additional $800 on that *chance*!?!?! And I really want to know what the plan is going to be for this blockage if we aren't successful this month. All of my googling shows that hydrosalpinx needs to be taken care of prior to IVF (which we were hoping to move on to if this cycle didn't work out) and people also sometimes need to have tubes removed! I'm just a worrier and reading that I might have to have a tube removed freaks me out. I know it's just Dr. Google but still. This cycle has been such a roller coaster we were considering taking the summer off from TTC for a mental break. However, if I need to have surgery or something I want to get that done ASAP so we are OK to TTC again when we are ready.
OK I think I need to be done ranting! Thanks for listening, as always!

I would definitely be frustrated. If there's anything I've learned, is that you really need to be your own advocate through this process.

If you feel like you shouldn't do the IUI because of all the facts you know (of your tube etc)...then don't let the doctor push you into it. I KNOW how hard it is, because if you don't do it then it's another month lost. Believe me, I know that pain all too well.

I totally hear you on wanting to do the surgery ASAP if that's what you need. Then you could break over summer and be geared up again for the fall.

Thanks for making me feel less guilty about being upset. The last few days have been an emotional roller coaster!

no problem, you deserve to cry all you want to...cry all you want to...(we would cry too if it happened to us!) Sing it!

Hey Girls

Hope everyone is doing well. Cher how are you doing after the transfer? fingers crossed and prayers are being said for you!

I am actually doing quite well. I took the entire week off of work last week. My boss actually suggested it to me, and I took her up on that offer. She is just wonderful!

It was very nice to be able to relax at home, and just watch some funny tv shows, have lunch with DH when he wasn't working, etc.

Then we went to Texas to visit his parents, surprised his mom for Mother's day. I took my first hpt when we got home on Sunday--it being mother's day and all--and it was negative of course. Too early!

Today I am 8dp3dt and my dollar tree hpt was negative. I realize that's not the best test...and that said, it could be way too early.

I've been having the typical little twinges and stuff since transfer. Darn PIO (progesterone shots, ugh). I've been cramping off and on since Thursday (and I know that can go either way). Yesterday I felt something different though. It was a pretty strong pain. I am praying my heart out that it was our sweet little one burrowing in for the long haul. I've had a few smaller crampies in the same spot, off and on since then.

I'm trying not to get my hopes up. DH has been pretty grounded. He has just been waiting for some spotting

They say that 80% of IVF pregnancies start with spotting! So bring it on...LOL

I am in the 2WW will go in next Tues for the beta. I ended up having 2 mature follicles instead of 3 so I was glad about that. 3 was freaking me out. I am off to NYC this weekend. Excited about that as I have never been. DH is there already for work so I meeting him there then we are flying home together. Going to see the Mary Poppins Broadway show and catch a Yankees game while seeing the other major sites and museums and getting my first taste of NY pizza. Will see if I like it better than Chicago pizza but I doubt it LOL

I'm glad you had 2 since it makes you feel better

mmmmm that sounds delicious!! I haven't been lucky enough to make it to New York or Chicago...but I'll probably hit NY before ever going to Chicago. My DH really wants to see NY (as do I....but the idea of NYC intimidates the living heck outta me)

I hope you enjoy the Mary Poppins...and the pizza. Definitely want to know your opinion upon your return! LOL

 

[Kennywife]

Well, guess who is going to need surgery?

Me.

My left fallopian tube is swelled up and the only way to unswell (is that even a word?! lol) it is to slice it or remove it.

They will do a laparscopy/hysteroscopy to fix it and reshape my uterus. (It's septid. Dent in it.)

They will also shave my fibroids.

The good thing: my ibs willl be gone!!!!! The tube is pressing on my colon. Plus, fertility should be restored and af will be normal....for the first time ever. lol.

If I don't get it done...I run the risk of an ectopic pregnancy/mc.

I tell you, I neeeeeddddd a Disney vacay after all this!!!!

Gabbie

 

[joanne312]

Well, guess who is going to need surgery?

Me.

My left fallopian tube is swelled up and the only way to unswell (is that even a word?! lol) it is to slice it or remove it.

They will do a laparscopy/hysteroscopy to fix it and reshape my uterus. (It's septid. Dent in it.)

They will also shave my fibroids.

The good thing: my ibs willl be gone!!!!! The tube is pressing on my colon. Plus, fertility should be restored and af will be normal....for the first time ever. lol.

If I don't get it done...I run the risk of an ectopic pregnancy/mc.

I tell you, I neeeeeddddd a Disney vacay after all this!!!!

Gabbie

Even though I am NOT happy that you need surgery, I'm glad that it will hopefully fix many problems. Do they have a diagnosis for the fallopian tube? I'm also having left tube problems The working diagnosis they have for it is something that doesn't just show up one day, which mine did. At least it appears on u/s to be getting better. If I'm not preg this cycle they are going to have to investigate more and I'm thinking I'll have to have a laproscopy.



After my last rant my follies decided to cooperate DH and I decided that we would only do IUI this month if we have good follicles on the right side, since my left has this tube thing going on. When I went in today I had a 19, 17, 16, 15, 14 all on my right side! So I'm all set to trigger and then have my IUI on Friday. Hopefully Friday the 13th will be a lucky day for us!

 

[AJ12345]

Hi everyone! I haven't posted in awhile. I had my first RE appt last night and went in for bloodwork this morning. 6am!!

Anyway, I need to have a HSG test done before I can start Clomid. Has anyone done this? How is the pain? I had an endometrial biopsy done and was told it would just be some cramping but it was the worst pain I think I've ever felt.

Also, yesterday was day 2 of my cycle and my doctor only counted 4-5 follicles. I am only 26 years old so this kind of freaked me out. He told me I should start Clomid with IUI next cycle once the HSG test comes back ok. 4-5 follicles is low correct???

I'm so new to this and it was just so overwhelming yesterday. I felt like everything was thrown at me all at once. The nurse was discussing IVF by the end of the appt. I hadn't even decided on the IUI!!!