They don't want to go! Can you believe it?!!

Good Ol Gal

A Longhorn living in Buckeye Country
Joined
Jul 24, 2004
Messages
20,322
Ok excuse me but I just have to vent a little bit here.....

We are going home to SSR in December. We have planned this trip for awhile and in-laws said that they would like to come too.

Great.. we LOVE them and they actually want to bring their RV and stay at the campgrounds. No problem. Well FIL mentioned that BIL has mentioned how he would love to be able to go too. So hubby and I talked about it and decided that ok, we'll invite them eventhough it would take 2 years of points for us all.

We have a family of 6, they have a family of 6 and we haven't seen each other in almost 6 years. (They're in CA, us in OH)

Hubby called BIL and asked him if they would like to join us and make a Grand Gatheirng of it with the whole family. He said "YEAH, that would be great!"

Ok.. so now we already have our 2 bedroom reserved at SSR for beg of Dec. So we expect to add another room for them. Well, they say that they can't go then, that it will have to be later in Dec. Ok... we didn't really want to go later, love the low crowds, but we will in order to all be together.

For the past two weeks I have been trying to get info from them on when they can go, are they commited, etc. Last night I called and got all final details from SIL and told her that we would be getting them their own room in their own name. Told her that I would be calling this morning to cancel our reservation and make new ones for the new trip.

Well, they called this morning and said "Never Mind". AGH!! I had already cancelled our old reservation, and booked the first night of our 2 two bedrooms!!

Well I called back and luckily got our reservation back to when we origianally wanted to go.

I feel both relieved and irritated and hurt about this whole thing. I am a Disney FANnatic! I already had bought matching shirts for the ladies, bid on matching ones for the guys, and got all the kids jackets.

I guess I just don't understand why they wouldn't want to go. They never said a real reason. When MIL asked if they really wanted to go all she got was a "NO". CRAZY people! LOL I don't think I would ever turn down a free stay at a DVC resort! :earboy2:

Well I guess in the end it will work out better.. If they're so wishy washy 11 months out, it probably wouldn't have worked real well there.

Thanks for listening.
 
Yes.. it is too bad that things won't come together. But,.. it is a lot better than having them fall apart later! I think you lucked out on this one. Glad you got your original ressie restored.. have a great time!
 
I agree with Frozenfingers: better that you found out now than later. Plus, in the end, no harm, no foul: you were able to secure your original reservations!

We occasionally offer our family members vacation freebies (not just to WDW, but to other places as well), and they have said, "No thanks." I just remind myself that *our* (DH and mine) idea of fun is not necessarily *their* idea of fun, and think, "Oh well, vive la difference."
 
I coordinated a surprise trip to Bermuda with my siblings and our children for my parents' 50th anniversary last year. We had planned to go over spring break, including one of my brothers who would bring his family all the way from Singapore for the occasion. My other (oldest) brother said that they could not possibly go before June 15, so we all adjusted and said OK and I booked our cottages at the Reefs for a week in July. We were all so excited.

A few months later my brother, who had insisted on those dates, said it was too expensive and they would not be able to make it. The rest of us went and had a fabulous time, but my parents were hurt that one family did not come, and the rest of us were irritated by the way it happened. I'm over it now.
 

Give them the shirts at Xmas presents, LOL. Good thing you found out now. And likely best not to plan on anything else with them other than maybe tell them when/where and invite them to make their own reservations if they want to join you. And don't be surprised if they invite themselves to use your points someday, maybe even without you.
 
That's why we ended up at WDW during Christmas! We had a great time!
This makes me want to rethink going to Hawaii to meet my in-laws over Christmas break. Much more expensive vacation for us, not as desireable to us right now with a DD 4yrs and DS 12yrs. They insist that they are going to be there over Christmas. I feel that we're scrambling for mileage tickets and getting the right accomodations, planning activities for the kids etc....just to see them for Christmas!? We live on the East Coast, so it's going to be a haul! They live on the West Coast, and wouldn't think of flying out to the Carribean (where we would rather go) because of the same issue.

Meanwhile, they want to 'suck up' one of our August weekends to go and see our vacation house at a mountain/lake community! Screws up my plans for a end of August WDW vacation! :charac2:

Thanks for posting this** I'm sorry that your family gathering didn't work out. Wish we had inlaws like you. We never get invited to 'free' stuff:)

We're going to buy lots of points from DVC, and just go to WDW any chance that we get! :flower1: :boat:
 
Sounds very frustrating. I wish you luck in this upcoming trip...at least you're guaranteed to have your immediate family there. I hope for your sake they don't change their mind. It just seems that people who aren't familiar with DVC do not have any understanding of the rules involved.

We invited close friends of ours to come with us this coming December. We successfully had a 2BR with them in May '04 and it worked out very well. They were gung-ho from the very beginning. I just hope we are that lucky again for this upcoming trip. I'd hate to have a 2BR for just me, DH and baby!

GOOD LUCK to you!
:flower:
 
What is wrong with people?!?!?! I can't imagine passing up on a trip to Disney world free or not! Which reminds me....we're a family of four, we could pose as your family members!!! :flower1: Tell them we had to change our appearance because we're in the witness protection program! :rolleyes: Just offering our services. :flower:

Shelby
(waiting on ROFR and feeling HOPELESS!!!)
 
Welcome to DVC!!!

The among the constants you will find when dealing with family:

1. They will never understand how difficult it can be to book a room at the resort you want, for the dates you want. Or, put another way, they will never understand why you want to plan so far in advance.

2. They will never understand impact of cancelling or changing a reservation on short notice.

3. They will never forgive you if you ever have the gall to say "I'm sorry but we just don't have the points to take you this time."

Even when dealing with my normally-rational parents, I've run into problems. Mom and step-Dad were scheduled to share a 2B with us in December '04. Before we even left for that trip, I went to Mom and said "hey, we could squeeze you into our 1B next May if step-Dad wouldn't mind." They had the conversation and decided it would be OK for her to come. In fact, step-Dad even made other plans to do something of interest to him later that month.

So, Mom bought an AP to cover both trips...airline tickets are purchased...and we're booked into a Standard View 1B at BWV.

Fast-forward a couple months and step-Dad now has little memory of the conversation and is acting disappointed that he can't come along. Live and learn, I guess. :flower1:
 
We have learned our lessons about inviting people. Now, we book the room and dates WE WANT, and then tell people "We're going on these dates, we have enough points to get a ressie for you, if you wish to join US."

While I'm sure you would have enjoyed seeing them again, the reality is most folks who don't own a points based timeshare just figure it didn't cost you anything anyway or that it is no problem at all for you to keep changing dates willy nilly. They don't have a clue.
 
Chuck S said:
We have learned our lessons about inviting people. Now, we book the room and dates WE WANT, and then tell people "We're going on these dates, we have enough points to get a ressie for you, if you wish to join US."
LOL, CHuck. I could have written that.

Chuck S said:
While I'm sure you would have enjoyed seeing them again, the reality is most folks who don't own a points based timeshare just figure it didn't cost you anything anyway or that it is no problem at all for you to keep changing dates willy nilly. They don't have a clue.
ITA. OTOH, I think WDW visits are expensive for many families. We are very fortuate to be able to go as often as we do.

Sometimes people don't realize the cost of WDW vacations and when they do, it's just too much. (For example, a fmily of four can easily spend way over $1000 just on park tickets). It's also hard for some people to admit that they cannot afford that kind of vacation.

FWIW, when we invite, I always give an estimate of park admission costs, airfare and car rental. I also estimate food costs. (When we invite, we don't charge anything for the room). I think the estimates help people to know right off if the trip is even doable for them.

Best wishes -
 
CarolMN said:
FWIW, when we invite, I always give an estimate of park admission costs, airfare and car rental. I also estimate food costs. (When we invite, we don't charge anything for the room). I think the estimates help people to know right off if the trip is even doable for them.

Best wishes -

I reasearched everything for them too. I gave them the exact cost for the tickets, and reseached the airlines as much as I could (most don't have fares out yet before 330 days out).

We know how expensive it can be.. our first WDW trip cost us $5000.. OUCH!! That was before DVC and we did fly.

In-laws said that they would pay for their tickets ($1334.00)!! And we were going to be giving them the room for free!! We were going to plan our days around them so that we could pick them up at the airport since we're driving.

They would have only had to pay for their airfare, food and spending money.

Overall I am happy that they aren't coming. We get to go at our desired time again and don't have to worry about pleasing everyone!
 
now I feel cheap for charging another couple (that are friends) $5 a point to go with us on a trip in April lol

Oh well - at least they are EXCITED to go and we are having a blast planning and making PS reservations, etc.
 
Just wait until August when they decide they really do want to go! ;)

(There's a reason that my ILs don't know about our DVC.)
 
Kids do this, too. For many years my mother would take children of our extended family to Disney when they reached the age of 10. Some of them were from poor or broken families who would never have the chance to go otherwise. After treating about a dozen kids to this trip over perhaps 20 years, she drew a lemon. The kid wasn't interested in parks or the pool, just wanted to stay in his room watching television, and saved up all his souvenir money so he could by a radio-controlled car from Radio Shack after he got home.

Oddly enough, after quite a bit of adversity this particular kid grew up to be one of the most responsible of his generation. Go figure. Maybe your in-laws will eventually grow up and become responsible as well!
 
I could not imagine anyone I know turning down a free week. When we go in 06 we have some friends renting points from us for the first of 2 weeks they only planned on going 1 week then as an early christmas gift we gave them a little note and offered up a second week of points for free. They were so extatic they couldn't believe we had done that.
 
I like Chuck S's attitude. We do the same thing. Vacationing with family can be wonderful, but the groundrules are always these: You do your thing and we'll do ours. Meet us at this place at this time. Bye. That's if you can coordinate a date....
 
Good Ol Gal said:
I reasearched everything for them too. I gave them the exact cost for the tickets, and reseached the airlines as much as I could (most don't have fares out yet before 330 days out).

We know how expensive it can be.. our first WDW trip cost us $5000.. OUCH!! That was before DVC and we did fly.

In-laws said that they would pay for their tickets ($1334.00)!! And we were going to be giving them the room for free!! We were going to plan our days around them so that we could pick them up at the airport since we're driving.

They would have only had to pay for their airfare, food and spending money.

Overall I am happy that they aren't coming. We get to go at our desired time again and don't have to worry about pleasing everyone!

We invited a 'friend' and her child to a trip out to California a couple of years ago. Carmel, SF and Lake Tahoe. OMG!!! Was she high maintenance!! I did all of the planning. Stayed at less expensive places because she was on a very limited budget! Which she ended up complaining about anyway. (Found out her budget was a lot more limited than even I could have imagined**but that's another story!) I gave her several oportunities to 'bail out' of the trip even at the last minute. So just last year, when she learned that we were going to WDW during Christmas Vacation, she said that she wanted to go too!? Yeah? I know that I have the need-to-please people-disease too, but I quickly answered her with, "Sorry, it's already been planned a long time ago!". Your in-laws are saving you a lot of grief by bowing out now, this early. You will still be able to plan :flower1: a wonderful vacation with your family that could have turned into an expensive disaster! :cheer2:
 
This thread scares me .....

I am anticipating the same last minute answers from my extended family. :rolleyes:

The DVC is mine alone!! :flower:

I have mentioned to 2 families (Cousin's kids..guess in their 30's with little ones)...BTW..who have NEVER been to Disney....that I am willing to offer them a 2006 Disney vacation, which of course means I have banked points and I'm not going in 2005 .

Both families said..yes. Now I have given them until May 05 to tell me, definitely, what week in 06.

Boy...am I scared :scared: this will wind up getting squashed after I make the ressies!!
 
I am glad things worked out for you. I understand your frustration. Our first trip home w/ be in Dec. I had thought a year or 2 later we could return this time w/ inlaws, my parents and my SIL and BIL and there daughter. I mentioned this to my MIL, a grand villa, showed her pictures and everything and she turned her nose up. Well, too bad, when the time comes to go again it will just be my family. I mean who passes up a free grand villa?
 
















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