The NASTEE (Nate And Spencer Trip ExtraordinairE) Trip Report--Day 5 (Part 2): They Do Realize It's A WATER Park, Right?
Cast:
Nate ("Aerobics"): 24, 4th trip to WDW, 1st trip in 12 years, 1st time staying on property
Spencer (Anti-aerobic): 29, 8th trip to WDW, hasn't stayed on property since 1992
Dates:
September 16-23, 2000
Lodging:
Wilderness Lodge--September 16-21, 2000
All Star Music--September 22, 2000
{Dear PassPorters, Intercotees, and DIS-ers: I apologize for the (very long) delay in my posting of the NASTEE. I am now settled into my new "deluxe apartment in the sky" (cuz, I'm "Movin' on Up", just like the Jeffersons) and really enjoying the single life (well, most parts of it, anyway). I hope that the remainder of the NASTEE is as entertaining as the first installments--as always, I welcome any comments and/or suggestions. Enjoy!!!}
Now, if my memory serves me correctly (which it does about 3% of the time), I was poised at the peak of Summit Plummet surveying the vast expanse below known as Blizzard Beach. In an almost out-of-body-experience-type fashion, I could feel my legs slowly shuffling to the entrance of the water chute. The rules are simple: Cross your arms and legs and DO NOT (under any circumstances whatsoever) uncross your legs unless you're still wearing your chastity belt. You can't really see down this slide because it really has just way too sharp of a grade, so you're just supposed to kinda lie on your back and look up at the roof of the Plummet launching station.
Eventually, the little flip light turned green, and I was was given the go-ahead. I slowly clenched my buns and scooted my booty close to the point of no return, and then...it happened--Gravity took over and I was "plummeting" downward at what felt like terminal velocity. I couldn't see anything and all you can hear is the rush of water (and the honking of low-flying geese--just kidding
). About 7 seconds later, I came skidding to a halt at the bottom of the chute. Now, being an aerobics instructor, I consider my legs to be fairly strong. No leg strength, however, is powerful enough to resist the force that will inevitably uncross your legs and permanently plant your swimsuit deep into the recesses of your butt crack. Thankfully, there are no spectators to your rear (literally <IMG WIDTH="15" HEIGHT="15" SRC="/infopop/emoticons/icon_razz.gif" alt="razz"> ), and so you do have a moment or two to extricate said swimsuit from said butt crack.
What a rush! After shaking out the water from my ears and the "Jello"-y feeling from my legs, I had just enough time to observe Spencer plummeting down, as well. He also ran into some leg crossing difficulties. So, our verdict: Fun slide! Do it once, do it early. CROSS YOUR LEGS!!! Tie your feet together, if you have to. All in all, this was definitely a highlight of the day.
Although most of the other slides seemed tame in comparison to Summit Plummet, each one had its own character that made it fun. Our next stop was the family raft ride Teamboat Springs. This queue is kew (spoken like Cartman). They have little spritzers and misters (some so misty that it looks like you're in this dense, mountainous fog--way cool!). These misters keep you cool as you stand in the hot sun (and since you're like 500 feet closer to the sun when you're standing at the top of Mt. Gushmore, you really need that misting effect (and your sunscreen)).
Teamboat Springs is like a water-slide version of Kali River Rapids, except that you sit cross-legged on the floor of the raft. I think that, next to the lazy river, this was our favorite attraction. I had read somewhere that this loading system that they have now (a converyor belt transports the rafts to the top) is much better than before, but we never saw the old one.
Don't forget to smile at the end of this one--there's a CM who takes your picture and then gives you a wristband for picture pick-up later in the day (very similar to when you enter the major parks).
We then moved on to the Run-Off Rapids. Beware: These are the only slides that must be accessed from the rear of the mountain. Be prepared to do quite a bit of hiking and stair climbing on this one. The Run-Off Rapids are 3 flume slides, one of which is enclosed. You can ride in one or two person rafts, but I don't think you can ride in tandem on the enclosed one (someone correct me if I'm wrong). These slides are rather typical water park slides, but they're long and they have some pretty unexpected twists, turns, and drops.
Also, when I used to work as a lifeguard at an indoor pool w/an enclosed flume, we were adamant about riding feet first, and we would "boot out" kids who didn't follow the rules. However, on these slides, you can't help but get turned around--in fact, it happens automatically. So, we did the Run-Off Rapids twice (once each in the enclosed and open slides).
We next decided to try the Downhill Double Dipper. This line is deceptively long, and we ended up waiting 25 minutes for an approximately 9 second long drop on an inner tube. The ride was indeed fun, but be careful when you get to the bottom. I thought I'd try to stop myself by dipping my foot into the water as I skimmed across the top. The effect was extremely similar to trying to put down your kickstand while going 40 MPH on your bicycle. I immediately flipped forward onto my face and swallowed about half of the catch pool--boy, was that fun!
Spencer, on the other hand, decided NOT to stop himself and went flying into the big bouncy pad things at the end of the catch pool. I think that would've been a cooler way to end the ride, but oh, well.
By this time, we were positively pooped from running around all over Mt. Gushmore, so we headed off to Cross Country Creek (the lazy river). Do some people just not get the concept of the LAZY river? There's a reason it's not called the "ACTIVE" river. On the whole, most people were behaving appropriately (i.e., just sitting there enjoying the scenery and relaxation), but occasionally, I'd get headbutted in my (yep, you guessed it!) recently flossed behind. I didn't care for that too much!
Cross Country Creek has one very deceptive element to it (and I'm wavering on whether I should expound on it). I think I will, so if you don't want to know what the surprise/deceptive element is, please skip this paragraph and resume reading at the beginning of the next one. At one point, you float "through" Mt. Gushmore via a cave that is leaking quite a bit. There is a large waterfall at the beginning of the cave which is dumping out water that is the same temperature as the water in which you're floating (which is rather warm). As you enter the cave, you get hit by this waterfall (it's almost impossible NOT to), and you're lulled into a false sense of security as you notice 5 or 6 more leaks up ahead. You may even nonchalantly redirect your raft so that you can have another "shower". BIG MISTAKE!!! All of the other leaks in the cave are leaking out freezing cold water (which, I guess should be expected--after all, you ARE at a ski resort, right?). I have never seen people "assume the fetal position" faster in my entire life! So, you've been warned...
After a couple circuits in Cross Country Creek, we decided to take a break and attempted to lay out for a while. However, the love bugs were in full force and quickly dashed our hopes of any kind of relaxation. Most of my time was spent "shooing" them away, but any type of body movement only attracted dozens more, so we finally just gave up and headed back to Mt. Gushmore.
By this time, it was about 1 p.m., and it had started to get cloudy, but it didn't seem like it was going to ruin anything, so we hopped in line for the Chair Lift. This is a really neat little idea. As we stood in line, the rain started to sprinkle a little bit harder, but nobody seemed to mind, since we were all already wet.
Well, all of us except for this one elderly couple about 15 people behind us. They were both easily in their 60s and were standing in line fully clothed. No joke! Button-down short sleeve shirt, pants, and sneakers for him; T-shirt, pants, sneakers, and a purse for her. Our first thought was, "They do realize it's a WATER park, right?", but how could they not? We figured that they were probably here w/some family and that they were just taking the Chair Lift to the top of Mt. Gushmore for scenic purposes.
On our way up the chair lift, Spencer found a Hidden Mickey made out of stones. Look down right before you reach the top of the chair lift, and you'll see it. Once we reached the top, we debated about where to go next and decided that we'd like to try Teamboat Springs again.
Note: By this time, the park seemed absolutely mobbed, and mostly with non-Americans. I am in no way making a judgment statement; just an observation that I guess that a lot of countries (especially most European countries, which were the languages that we heard most often at Blizzard Beach) probably don't get a lot of nice, Floridian-type summer weather, and a visit to a water park is probably a major treat for them. So, I'm glad that they were able to enjoy Blizzard Beach, as it was obvious that most of them did.
So, we got in line for Teamboat Springs. A few minutes later, Spencer told me to turn around (but slowly, so as not to seem too obvious). Guess who was standing behind us (again, about 15 people away)? Yep...the fully clothed couple from the Chair Lift. We spent the next 10 minutes trying to fathom how they could possibly not know into what they were getting themselves. But, they stayed there just the same, queue misters, purse, and all.
Our second trip down Teamboat Springs was just as fun, if not more, than our first one. Now that we knew what was coming, we could "lean into" the turns, curves, and drops better. Again, we got our picture taken and all was well. Spencer suggested that we wait around a few minutes to see if our fully clothed friends would make it down ok. Sure enough, about 3 minutes later, out comes their raft; and the 2 of them were just laughing and smiling and carrying on like a couple of teenagers. Spencer and I gave them a standing ovation for their incredible sense of spontaneity. (We almost offered to purchase their picture for them w/the stipulation that they wouldn't mind our picking up a copy for ourselves, but we decided not to.)
After 2 more relaxing rounds on Cross Country Creek, we paused to check out the time, even though we weren't on any kind of "time schedule" today. Seeing that it was nearing 3:00 p.m., we decided to call it quits and gathered our belongings and headed back to the bus transportation area where we waited about 10 minutes before boarding a Wilderness Lodge-bound bus...
Stay tuned for The NASTEE Trip Report--Day 5 (Part 3): "Mom, Mary's Touching My Pee-Pee!"
Somebody call I-X-I-I!!!
Cast:
Nate ("Aerobics"): 24, 4th trip to WDW, 1st trip in 12 years, 1st time staying on property
Spencer (Anti-aerobic): 29, 8th trip to WDW, hasn't stayed on property since 1992
Dates:
September 16-23, 2000
Lodging:
Wilderness Lodge--September 16-21, 2000
All Star Music--September 22, 2000
{Dear PassPorters, Intercotees, and DIS-ers: I apologize for the (very long) delay in my posting of the NASTEE. I am now settled into my new "deluxe apartment in the sky" (cuz, I'm "Movin' on Up", just like the Jeffersons) and really enjoying the single life (well, most parts of it, anyway). I hope that the remainder of the NASTEE is as entertaining as the first installments--as always, I welcome any comments and/or suggestions. Enjoy!!!}
Now, if my memory serves me correctly (which it does about 3% of the time), I was poised at the peak of Summit Plummet surveying the vast expanse below known as Blizzard Beach. In an almost out-of-body-experience-type fashion, I could feel my legs slowly shuffling to the entrance of the water chute. The rules are simple: Cross your arms and legs and DO NOT (under any circumstances whatsoever) uncross your legs unless you're still wearing your chastity belt. You can't really see down this slide because it really has just way too sharp of a grade, so you're just supposed to kinda lie on your back and look up at the roof of the Plummet launching station.
Eventually, the little flip light turned green, and I was was given the go-ahead. I slowly clenched my buns and scooted my booty close to the point of no return, and then...it happened--Gravity took over and I was "plummeting" downward at what felt like terminal velocity. I couldn't see anything and all you can hear is the rush of water (and the honking of low-flying geese--just kidding
). About 7 seconds later, I came skidding to a halt at the bottom of the chute. Now, being an aerobics instructor, I consider my legs to be fairly strong. No leg strength, however, is powerful enough to resist the force that will inevitably uncross your legs and permanently plant your swimsuit deep into the recesses of your butt crack. Thankfully, there are no spectators to your rear (literally <IMG WIDTH="15" HEIGHT="15" SRC="/infopop/emoticons/icon_razz.gif" alt="razz"> ), and so you do have a moment or two to extricate said swimsuit from said butt crack.What a rush! After shaking out the water from my ears and the "Jello"-y feeling from my legs, I had just enough time to observe Spencer plummeting down, as well. He also ran into some leg crossing difficulties. So, our verdict: Fun slide! Do it once, do it early. CROSS YOUR LEGS!!! Tie your feet together, if you have to. All in all, this was definitely a highlight of the day.
Although most of the other slides seemed tame in comparison to Summit Plummet, each one had its own character that made it fun. Our next stop was the family raft ride Teamboat Springs. This queue is kew (spoken like Cartman). They have little spritzers and misters (some so misty that it looks like you're in this dense, mountainous fog--way cool!). These misters keep you cool as you stand in the hot sun (and since you're like 500 feet closer to the sun when you're standing at the top of Mt. Gushmore, you really need that misting effect (and your sunscreen)).
Teamboat Springs is like a water-slide version of Kali River Rapids, except that you sit cross-legged on the floor of the raft. I think that, next to the lazy river, this was our favorite attraction. I had read somewhere that this loading system that they have now (a converyor belt transports the rafts to the top) is much better than before, but we never saw the old one.
Don't forget to smile at the end of this one--there's a CM who takes your picture and then gives you a wristband for picture pick-up later in the day (very similar to when you enter the major parks).
We then moved on to the Run-Off Rapids. Beware: These are the only slides that must be accessed from the rear of the mountain. Be prepared to do quite a bit of hiking and stair climbing on this one. The Run-Off Rapids are 3 flume slides, one of which is enclosed. You can ride in one or two person rafts, but I don't think you can ride in tandem on the enclosed one (someone correct me if I'm wrong). These slides are rather typical water park slides, but they're long and they have some pretty unexpected twists, turns, and drops.
Also, when I used to work as a lifeguard at an indoor pool w/an enclosed flume, we were adamant about riding feet first, and we would "boot out" kids who didn't follow the rules. However, on these slides, you can't help but get turned around--in fact, it happens automatically. So, we did the Run-Off Rapids twice (once each in the enclosed and open slides).
We next decided to try the Downhill Double Dipper. This line is deceptively long, and we ended up waiting 25 minutes for an approximately 9 second long drop on an inner tube. The ride was indeed fun, but be careful when you get to the bottom. I thought I'd try to stop myself by dipping my foot into the water as I skimmed across the top. The effect was extremely similar to trying to put down your kickstand while going 40 MPH on your bicycle. I immediately flipped forward onto my face and swallowed about half of the catch pool--boy, was that fun!
Spencer, on the other hand, decided NOT to stop himself and went flying into the big bouncy pad things at the end of the catch pool. I think that would've been a cooler way to end the ride, but oh, well.By this time, we were positively pooped from running around all over Mt. Gushmore, so we headed off to Cross Country Creek (the lazy river). Do some people just not get the concept of the LAZY river? There's a reason it's not called the "ACTIVE" river.
On the whole, most people were behaving appropriately (i.e., just sitting there enjoying the scenery and relaxation), but occasionally, I'd get headbutted in my (yep, you guessed it!) recently flossed behind. I didn't care for that too much! Cross Country Creek has one very deceptive element to it (and I'm wavering on whether I should expound on it). I think I will, so if you don't want to know what the surprise/deceptive element is, please skip this paragraph and resume reading at the beginning of the next one. At one point, you float "through" Mt. Gushmore via a cave that is leaking quite a bit. There is a large waterfall at the beginning of the cave which is dumping out water that is the same temperature as the water in which you're floating (which is rather warm). As you enter the cave, you get hit by this waterfall (it's almost impossible NOT to), and you're lulled into a false sense of security as you notice 5 or 6 more leaks up ahead. You may even nonchalantly redirect your raft so that you can have another "shower". BIG MISTAKE!!! All of the other leaks in the cave are leaking out freezing cold water (which, I guess should be expected--after all, you ARE at a ski resort, right?). I have never seen people "assume the fetal position" faster in my entire life! So, you've been warned...
After a couple circuits in Cross Country Creek, we decided to take a break and attempted to lay out for a while. However, the love bugs were in full force and quickly dashed our hopes of any kind of relaxation. Most of my time was spent "shooing" them away, but any type of body movement only attracted dozens more, so we finally just gave up and headed back to Mt. Gushmore.
By this time, it was about 1 p.m., and it had started to get cloudy, but it didn't seem like it was going to ruin anything, so we hopped in line for the Chair Lift. This is a really neat little idea. As we stood in line, the rain started to sprinkle a little bit harder, but nobody seemed to mind, since we were all already wet.
Well, all of us except for this one elderly couple about 15 people behind us. They were both easily in their 60s and were standing in line fully clothed. No joke! Button-down short sleeve shirt, pants, and sneakers for him; T-shirt, pants, sneakers, and a purse for her. Our first thought was, "They do realize it's a WATER park, right?", but how could they not? We figured that they were probably here w/some family and that they were just taking the Chair Lift to the top of Mt. Gushmore for scenic purposes.
On our way up the chair lift, Spencer found a Hidden Mickey made out of stones. Look down right before you reach the top of the chair lift, and you'll see it. Once we reached the top, we debated about where to go next and decided that we'd like to try Teamboat Springs again.
Note: By this time, the park seemed absolutely mobbed, and mostly with non-Americans. I am in no way making a judgment statement; just an observation that I guess that a lot of countries (especially most European countries, which were the languages that we heard most often at Blizzard Beach) probably don't get a lot of nice, Floridian-type summer weather, and a visit to a water park is probably a major treat for them. So, I'm glad that they were able to enjoy Blizzard Beach, as it was obvious that most of them did.
So, we got in line for Teamboat Springs. A few minutes later, Spencer told me to turn around (but slowly, so as not to seem too obvious). Guess who was standing behind us (again, about 15 people away)? Yep...the fully clothed couple from the Chair Lift. We spent the next 10 minutes trying to fathom how they could possibly not know into what they were getting themselves. But, they stayed there just the same, queue misters, purse, and all.
Our second trip down Teamboat Springs was just as fun, if not more, than our first one. Now that we knew what was coming, we could "lean into" the turns, curves, and drops better. Again, we got our picture taken and all was well. Spencer suggested that we wait around a few minutes to see if our fully clothed friends would make it down ok. Sure enough, about 3 minutes later, out comes their raft; and the 2 of them were just laughing and smiling and carrying on like a couple of teenagers. Spencer and I gave them a standing ovation for their incredible sense of spontaneity. (We almost offered to purchase their picture for them w/the stipulation that they wouldn't mind our picking up a copy for ourselves, but we decided not to.)
After 2 more relaxing rounds on Cross Country Creek, we paused to check out the time, even though we weren't on any kind of "time schedule" today. Seeing that it was nearing 3:00 p.m., we decided to call it quits and gathered our belongings and headed back to the bus transportation area where we waited about 10 minutes before boarding a Wilderness Lodge-bound bus...
Stay tuned for The NASTEE Trip Report--Day 5 (Part 3): "Mom, Mary's Touching My Pee-Pee!"
Somebody call I-X-I-I!!!
