The happyhaunts' Rooms Without a View! Chapter 'o soup ~ Pg.40!

[Busymom85]

I'm enjoying it so far. Hope you finish this one.

 

[WDWLinda]

I thought all you legendary trip report authors always finished your reports. I never finish READING them, due to a short attention span and poor navigational skills through tons of replies. So I'll sign on as a groupie for this one just to see that not every trip report gets finished, but that's still OK. Plus it'll waste a good 6 months or so I'm sure.

Thanks!

Linda

 

[AshClan]

I had heard tell of suspicions that you were, indeed, in the World recently! Two weeks must've been heavenly! So happy to see yet another unfinished trippie to add to the oh-so-entertaining list. Most of all, I'm happy to share in another Happyhaunt adventure with our Queen Bee (NOB) of the TR board.

I don't have time to quote (tho I'm not packing like our homeless Frick), but wanted you to know that the "zipless flight" was FOFF. In terms of Beth's "get to the airport on time" stress, I used to be the same way. This weekend, we flew on 4 different planes (for some fun Viking visits!!), and pretty much made it to the gate just in time for the "general boarding" calls. It was a little stressful, but I loved not having to wait around!! So tell Beth to leave her arm alone rotfl and live life (a little) dangerously next time!

I am looking forward to the rest, Mel. I truly hope that my eyesight stays strong into my 90's so I can read all the way to the end of this sure-to-be-great report!!

 

[coles1mom]

It's true..it's true

The queen of unfinished trip(e) reports is back.

I'm in.

Judi

 

[ClaraBug]

Hmmmm....

Do they get through the border or not?!

I just can't take the anticipation!

 

[1000thhappyhaunt]

Ok.

I'm glad I've got a few familiar readers here. And some new ones, too. But... let's get this straight: I'm NOT GONNA FINISH THIS ONE!!!!


Psyche!


It's my intention to finish it. But... let's not get all crazy and ahead of ourselves. This soon off the hop.


In fact, my arm is already starting to itch and throb. Thinking about it.

NOMellyman.


I think I may need to borrow his cream, or BALM, or even some medicated pads.

On the other hand... I could just ignore all little physical annoyances and little warning signs. Of problems.

As usual. Until they blow up into a major infection of some kind and I have to be hospitalized.

And then, just like the big 'ol scar on my butt, I'll live to regret my foolishness!


Yep. That's my style.


But... I figure I can afford to risk it. Got two arms. Anyway. And approximately 1 and 3/4 buttcheeks.


Moving on:


Still Day 1 ~ Arrival Day.

I was digging madly in my Disney Kit. Mellyman was digging madly into the meat of his arm.

And Calvin was kicking the back of Beth's seat in the van.

Beth was yelling at Calvin to stop.

And Tommy was singing "Beans beans the musical fruit..." for the twentieth time today.

All this... one car away from the border security guard. U.S. side.


"EVERYONE!!!!! SHUT IT!!!!!"!!!!!


That was Mellyman.


"You said 'SHUT UP', Dad! That's rude. Timeout time!"


That was Calvin.


"I said 'SHUT IT'! That's different."


That was Mellyman.


"That's not what I heard. I heard 'Shut up'."


That was Calvin.


"CALVIN... I CLEARLY said 'Shut IT!' NOT SHUT UP!"!!!!


That was Mellyman.


"SHUT UP!!!! SHUT UP!!!! EVERYONE! RIGHT NOW!!!"!!!!


That was Me(l).


And so the family vacation blissfully begins.


But... they all shut up. Anyhow.


And I found the passports. And some jellybeans from last May. Over a year before. And also my temper. Mixed with a little rage.


I waved the passports at Mellyman.


He sighed with relief.


And we waited. And waited and waited.


For the car in front of us to drive away.


Of course we were in the wrong line. And the car in front of us was filled with either terrorists or really cute girls.


Mellyman gave his standing order: "No one say anything. Take your sunglasses off Mel. Mel... don't say anything. Not one thing. Not a thing. Not one little thing. Hear me?! Let me do the talking. Mel?! Hear me?"

Yep.


Same thing. Every border crossing.


Finally the car ahead of us moved. And Mellyman started to inch our van forwards.

At about one inch per minute.


I looked at him, "CHOP CHOP!!! We only have TWO WEEKS, honey!"!


"Starting NOW!!!! NOT ONE WORD!!!"!!!


That was Mellyman.


Finally, before I lived an entire full and rewarding life in the 15 metres between the stop sign and the actual border guard... we arrived at the booth.


He looked in. Asked where we were going.

"DISNEYWORLD!!!!"!!!!!!!


That was Me(l).


Mellyman shot me a withering look and tore at the flesh on his arm.


The fellow asked for our Passports and Mellyman handed them over.


The guy looked at them. And then us. And then them again.


Asked us to open the sliding door of the van. And looked inside at the kids.

"Are these children yours?!" He asked.


Mellyman said "yes". I mumbled "unfortunately".


I got the itchy arm's right elbow in the left chestal region. Pretty hard.


Then the guy looked at me and said, "Are these children YOURS too?".


I nodded.


"Pardon?" He asked.


I nodded again.


Mellyman turned and looked at me like he would KILL ME. Right there and then.

"Yes." I said.


(I thought I wasn't supposed to speak. Heh heh.)


We finished the interview and got away with directions to the airport, just to be sure we wouldn't get lost, and a "Have a nice day"!!!!


Mellyman drove off.


I asked him how his arm was doin'.


He didn't answer. He just said that the reason the guard asked if they were ALSO my children was b/c I had neglected to change my name when we got married. And THESE are the type of little problems you can run into. When you don't take your husbands name like you SHOULD. And, he mentioned, if you DON'T take your husbands name you should at least listen to him when he tells you to not say a word. And other stuff. Of this nature.

I told him I like my name better.


And I offered to scratch his arm for him while he drove.


We avoided getting lost.


Usually the happyhaunts get lost. At some point on vacation. We even have a saying, "If we're on time, we're in town. An hour late, that's just great. If we're longer, then we're loster!"!!!! But, this time... no prob. We found the airport. It was miraculously in the same place as last May and last October. And pulled into the Longterm Parking Lot. We found a spot and started unloading our suitcases and carryons and gear and waited for the Airport Shuttle to pick us up.

Beth and Mellyman kept glancing at their watches. Looking at each other and nodding. Apparently we were right on schedule.

The Airport Shuttle pulled up and we started to climb up the stairs. The driver took one look at all our crap and said, "Hang on. I gotta open the back doors to fit all of that in."

BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ! BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!


BUZZZZZZZZZZ. BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.


The emergency exit door buzzed the whole time Mellyman was loading the suitcases. BUZZ.

BUZZ.

It's the MOST ANNOYING THING EVER. Both forwards. And, especially, backwards.


Tommy was sitting on his seat with his hands pressed over his ears. His Go Diego Go Rescue Pack in his lap. And Calvin beside him. Trying to pry Tommy's hands off his ears.


We got to the main terminal and Mellyman tipped the driver. And we unloaded our crap.


BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ! BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!! BUZZZZZZZZZZZZ!


And with everyone carrying and wheeling stuff we got into line for our baggage tickets and our boarding passes. We sent most everything into the hold. Including Tommy's booster seat. And 8 bags.

Then we headed for the security checkpoint. With Mellyman gnawing on his right stump. Of an arm.


Our passports were checked again. And we were directed through to the x-ray machines and the medal detector.

That's RIGHT, BABYBEEE!

The medal detector detected my OLYMPIC GOLD WATERSLIDE MEDAL!!!! Pairs event. Synchronized pairs.

Or did it?

Actually it was a METAL DETECTOR and I went through just fine. Shoes and shirt off.

I like to be thorough.

And, just for the record, I was wearing a tank, too.


And a Goofy Hat.


And glasses with a fake nose and mustache. Except the mustache was real.


Ok. OK.


But... at this point I wish I had REALLY called this trippie "Could We BE Any Homelier!" 'Cause I think I'm makin' a point here. Of some sort.


Then, again, I have a lot of fake eyelash and dramatic makeup tips for the Pirate Eye in all of us. That I'd like to impart. Somewhere in this TR.


Or do I?


We all made it through the security checkpoint. That's what I was getting to. Eventually. And hustled our bustles... just like Mellyman... down to our Gate. For departure.


First, tho, I had to make a quick run to the bathroom.


And vomit wildly. From pent up pre-flight stress and anxiety. B/c it was NEARLY GO-TIME!!!!


And a plane is my own personal "Vomit Comet".


NOApollo13.


Then... it was right off to grab snacks for the plane.


How ironic?!


Is that?!


What happened, tho, was this: Beth and I were in the LONGEST line. Loaded down with Pringles, peanuts, pretzels, pork rinds and the latest PEOPLE magazine. Because I told Beth that everything we bought had to start with the SAME LETTER.

I'm not joking about this.


I like to issue little "challenges" to my family. When we are out and about. It makes even boring errands a little bit more exciting. I think. And it's the type of thing they'll remember fondly when they're grown and have their own families.

And NOT repeat the tradition.


Leaving me with just my aged yet still-BEAUTIFUL Bride... to complete our little fun-filled and challenging scavenger hunts for Ziplock bags, zucchini, Zoodles, zebu chops and ZZUB.


Cheers, Mel.





P.S. Stay tuned for our dilemna. We're STILL in line. And... our group starts loading on the plane. What happens? You'll see. Maybe.

 

[mercydisney]

I love your TR!! Even if you don't finish it, I still will have enjoyed what I read (input smilee playing violin).

You are great writer.

 

[AlyssinWonderland]

I've never read one of your unfinished trip reports before....now I'm going to have to! Great start!

 

[pongoperdigirl]

MELLY POO!!!!!!!

Glad to see ya girlfriend.

2 weeks eh?
That's a mighty long time.
(Where is everyone?)

Can't wait to not finish this report too.

 

[Libade]

Wait. She finished one? When did that happen?

That's exactly what I was thinking. There is one that is finished? Where is it exactly????

I need to take notes on the trip reports that I am currently reading - I can't catch up!

Anyway....Mel - bring it on. I love to read about you and your family, but not in a stalker bad way.

 

[ZZUB]

Why don't you avoid the problem you usually have and just post the ending now. That way, you know you will have finished it. You do know how this thing ends, don't you?

Does it end? Or is it like Saved By The Bell and will we be forced to look at it for all eternity?!

I can't believe we let you in here. What purpose does the Department of Homeland Security serve anyway?!

 

[pongoperdigirl]

Mel.

Your cat got out.

Again.

Please come get him.

 

[jamal]

You went to Disney World again and are going to pretend to write another trip report about it?

Well, you've inspired me. It's shameful to have all these reports dangling around in cyberspace so I'm gonna finish up my tripie drivel.

While you were, I assume, on your return trip, I was doing something DIFFFERENT and FUN and FANTASTIC that will make you PUKE with ENVY this weekend.

Wanna know what it was?


I had THREE DAYS and NIGHTS of dinners and cocktails and fun in my very own kitchen WITH the Ashclan, Kpk family, Frickles, and Tink38s.

Bwahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!

 

[pongoperdigirl]

Jami!

Don't forget you got to talk to some great people too!

 

[kindakrazy2]

I'm so in on this one!

 

[Shelby5514]

2 weeks??? Did Biergarten have enough weiner salad to feed your clan for 2 whole weeks?

Glad to see ya back, but you COULD have let us know you were going.


Some friend you are.

 

[Backstage_Gal]

Me(l), great as always. Hereditary itchy stress disorder arm (HISDA), poor Beth! (as opposed to HISTA, which is another thing altogether).

Lots of old familiar names here. Hey guys!

 

[burly]

Ah Mel!!! Funny stuff sister. What was i thinking...15 bags. I had no idea you would pack so light. But i did get close on the bathing suits. By the way i use five..teen all the time. Hope you don't mind.

 

[Frickles]

BUZZZZZZZZZZ. BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.

The emergency exit door buzzed the whole time Mellyman was loading the suitcases. BUZZ.

BUZZ.

It's the MOST ANNOYING THING EVER. Both forwards. And, especially, backwards.

Good one Mel!!!!

Hi Zzub!

Mel!!! Did you watch Posh Spice's reality show this week? She itches when she gets stressed out too! I'll be dang.

Yes, it is true, I was at Jami's house this past weekend, and she did a fierce impression of what she thinks you are like whenever you get a funny thought to post. We all just love you!

Thanks for the giggles!

 

[Lifelong_Dreamer]

Your posts never fail to make me laugh. Can't wait to hear what you do about the boarding of your plane. The issues with border crossing are very familiar to my family.

I love crossing the border and being treated like I am terrorist or smuggling goods. My mom and I had gone shopping in Syracuse for half a day and when we were crossing back into Canada we were sent over to Customs to pay duty. Well I guess the officer in there thought that a 40 year old woman and her daughter who had gone shopping for half a day were highly suspicious so he said that our car needed to be searched What fun that was. The guy who ended up searching our car had no idea why we had been flagged for a search and did a half hearted job of it. He only opened a few bags to look into. What a pain it was though. It ate up 45 minutes of my day.

Another border crossing story from my childhood. My mom is American and was down in Ohio visiting my grandparents. My dad was driving down to join her. I was may be 2 or 3 at the time. I was in the backseat with toys spread out all over the place and the guard asked my dad if I was his kid and he said I was. I guess the guard didn't believe him though so he asked my dad to unlock the back door and the guard then came down to my level to ask me if the man in the car was my daddy. Good thing for my dad I was not upset with him that day because I can only imagine what would have happened if I had said no.