Teachers involved with private conversations

[glitterkittyy]

well, how about this twist?

What about employees/bosses? I am a teacher, and was absolutely BLASTED by my principal (and lost a subsequent job opportunity, I believe) after she overheard a private conversation that I was having. She missed more than half of the beginning of the conversation, so that what she heard was SO out of context that she took it to mean something TOTALLY different that what was intended. NOT TO MENTION.....she was eavesdropping!!!!

I tried in vain to explain the misunderstanding, but she would have none of it. She screamed at me, berated me, and humiliated me.

Do bosses have the right?

If you said it at work, they do. Though she isn't a model boss because one should always hear the other person out and never scream, berate or humiliate. But caution must be used when you are conversing with others in the workplace. JMHO

 

[happygirl]

well, how about this twist?

What about employees/bosses? I am a teacher, and was absolutely BLASTED by my principal (and lost a subsequent job opportunity, I believe) after she overheard a private conversation that I was having. She missed more than half of the beginning of the conversation, so that what she heard was SO out of context that she took it to mean something TOTALLY different that what was intended. NOT TO MENTION.....she was eavesdropping!!!!

I tried in vain to explain the misunderstanding, but she would have none of it. She screamed at me, berated me, and humiliated me.

Do bosses have the right?

I think your boss was way out of line,

 

[michellev]

I think detention should be a big deal, If it's not then what the point of it. When I was in school detention was a horrible thing.

The point of detention (in my experience) is to punish students for minor infractions - persistent lateness, truants, minor behavioural issues. Students have to give up some of their own time (mostly detentions occur at lunch) as a consequence. Students don't like spending their lunch hour in detention, so this may deter them from repeating the offence.

More serious infractions require more serious punishment -that is when a suspension will occur.

 

[happygirl]

The point of detention (in my experience) is to punish students for minor infractions - persistent lateness, truants, minor behavioural issues. Students have to give up some of their own time (mostly detentions occur at lunch) as a consequence. Students don't like spending their lunch hour in detention, so this may deter them from repeating the offence.

More serious infractions require more serious punishment -that is when a suspension will occur.

I can understand that.

 

[BeachGirlFLA]

The point of detention (in my experience) is to punish students for minor infractions - persistent lateness, truants, minor behavioural issues. Students have to give up some of their own time (mostly detentions occur at lunch) as a consequence. Students don't like spending their lunch hour in detention, so this may deter them from repeating the offence.

More serious infractions require more serious punishment -that is when a suspension will occur.

The persistent lateness was what always got me.....there was only one time I got a detention because of anything else (and it was something that happened off school property, not during school hours, and not in uniform so I really don't think the school had any right to punish me for it, but whatever...it was 15 years ago now.) It made me so mad when I got detentions for being late in the morning because it was ALWAYS my mom's fault. I was always ready on time and she tends to run late.
As far as the OP's question, I do think that punishment was a bit severe if it was something that was not said during class time and was overheard at recess or something.

 

[MaryAnnDVC]

well I just asked EVERY single person i know about this and they all agree that detention is too harsh!!!

EVERY single person?!?! WOW!

Wow, that was fast! How many people do you know? lol

ETA: it's not like this anything physical or abusive or threatening - this was a kid that let a little steam off and just should have been warned....where is common since going????/

So if it's not physical or abusive or threatening...but just letting off a little steam (how about "That teacher's a ****ing *******"?), it's OK?

It's not a big deal. He did something wrong and got a small punishment for it. Not suspension, or expulsion, or a beating or kicked off a team....just detention.

Exactly.

hmmmm, I think that detention was appropriate for that. Saying it withen earshot about a teacher could have meant they wanted teacher to hear it?? and the teacher wouldn't really know either way so I think it was a correct decission. Commiing home and saying it was "private" is a good way to get his mom going. But I don't see there being ANY privacy at a school. The comment was heard and he was punished as he should.

That's exactly what I was thinking.

The point of detention (in my experience) is to punish students for minor infractions - persistent lateness, truants, minor behavioural issues. Students have to give up some of their own time (mostly detentions occur at lunch) as a consequence. Students don't like spending their lunch hour in detention, so this may deter them from repeating the offence.

More serious infractions require more serious punishment -that is when a suspension will occur.

 

[MM27]

I always tell my students that they have the right to their opinion, but they don't always have the right to share it. I explain that we all have thoughts in our heads that we'd love to say out loud but it's not always appropriate to say them, even teachers

Had he been quieter, the teacher never would have heard him.

For those that think detention was uncalled for, would you be okay then with the son overhearing two teachers talking where one of the teachers called him a jerk? Jerk is no big deal right?

 

[shirleyb]

I'm not getting those of you that think detention is so harsh. It's staying after school one day for what, an hour or so? At least that's what it was when I was in high school back when the dinosaurs were alive.

I was a straight A student and I got detention once for talking in study hall. My mom thought it was funny and so did I!

 

[My sister's princess]

just wondering why your son thought the teacher was a jerk? I got caught doing this when I was in elementary school pretty sure I lost recess and the teacher scared the heck out of me when she caught me.

I don't think it is too harsh a punishment. I honestly think that people are responsible for the things that they say and do. The purpose of school is to teach children (in some cases young adults). This would be a life lesson.


So my question to people who think this was too extreme of a punishment; what would you have done, and do you think that it would have made the same impression (not about the teacher, but about the action) on the student

 

[mrsklamc]

It wasn't that private a conversation or the teacher wouldn't have heard him.

I'd chalk it up to a lesson learned. Who knows, may have saved your DS from having to learn this in his professional life someday, where the same mistake could be a lot more costly.

I always find it sorta ironic- I remember in elementary school lots and lots of lessons about 'Being yourself' that I never got, because it never occurred to me to be less than 100% real. What I needed were more lessons like this- shut UP every once in awhile.

 

[BLTtinkerbell]

If you don't have anything nice to say....say it quietly.

Tag fairy, where are you?

 

[mrodgers]

Now, if the kid had said I;m going to shot Mr, Jackson because he's a jerk, then the teacher should have said something then

Not only that, but the kid's English teacher should be fired as well

 

[TwinsinCA]

For those that think detention was uncalled for, would you be okay then with the son overhearing two teachers talking where one of the teachers called him a jerk? Jerk is no big deal right?

That is not the same thing. In your scenario a specific child is being singled out. The OP's son didn't say "Mr. Anderson is a jerk".

But I stand by my opinion that the word "jerk" is no big deal. As long as the teachers were not using the word to a child's face nor speaking about a specific child, I don't think it is that offensive. Some kids are jerks and so are some teachers. Sometimes the word fits.

Now if this conversation is being screamed across a hall where anyone can't help but overhear, then I might have an issue. But a conversation between two adults or two teenagers is just that...between them. If someone else wants to listen in they have no right to get their panties in a bunch because they don't like what was said. There are no threats being made, it is just a vent between two people. Period.

 

[Skywalker]

Calling a teacher a jerk? If he wanted it to be a "private conversation" he should have said it off school property.

I don't think detention is too harsh at all! Sheesh it's not like he's being expelled or something, it's a detention.

Is he bothered by it or just you?

 

[ilovefh]

I think a detention is fair punishment. If it was said loud enough for the teacher to hear it was not a private conversation. If I was having a conversation about a student and called them a jerk and it was overheard you can bet there would be a phone call to administration! In fact, there was a thread that included something along these lines not too long ago and people were FURIOUS that a teacher would imply that a kid was a jerk!

IMHO your son was hopefully taught a good life lesson. Be careful what you say, when you say it and where you say it.


In our school students get a 15 minute detention for saying "shut up" so you can bet that he would have gotten detention in our school!

 

[ilovefh]

That is not the same thing. In your scenario a specific child is being singled out. The OP's son didn't say "Mr. Anderson is a jerk".

But I stand by my opinion that the word "jerk" is no big deal. As long as the teachers were not using the word to a child's face nor speaking about a specific child, I don't think it is that offensive. Some kids are jerks and so are some teachers. Sometimes the word fits.

Now if this conversation is being screamed across a hall where anyone can't help but overhear, then I might have an issue. But a conversation between two adults or two teenagers is just that...between them. If someone else wants to listen in they have no right to get their panties in a bunch because they don't like what was said. There are no threats being made, it is just a vent between two people. Period.

So you're saying if your child overheard two of his/her teacher's saying "kids are jerks" you would tell your child not to "get their panties in a bunch because they don't like what was said. There are no threats being made, it is just a vent between two people?"

 

[Gabes_mommy]

For those of you who said detention was serious at your schools, what made it so? I am not being critical, just curious.

At my school it was sitting in a classroom either at lunch or after school with no talking, but homework was allowed. I always just did my homework during detention.

 

[Minnie_me]

If you said it at work, they do. Though she isn't a model boss because one should always hear the other person out and never scream, berate or humiliate. But caution must be used when you are conversing with others in the workplace. JMHO

You misunderstood. What I said was totally harmless! But the principal heard just bits and pieces WAY out of context, and took them to mean something detrimental. I honestly said nothing wrong! If she wasn't eavesdropping, she never would have misheard what was said.

 

[TwinsinCA]

So you're saying if your child overheard two of his/her teacher's saying "kids are jerks" you would tell your child not to "get their panties in a bunch because they don't like what was said. There are no threats being made, it is just a vent between two people?"

Yes. It was not a conversation meant for her ears.

I volunteer enough in school to know some kids *are* jerks. I am not going to get all bent out of shape because a teacher was venting to a colleague.

 

[ilovefh]

Yes. It was not a conversation meant for her ears.

I volunteer enough in school to know some kids *are* jerks. I am not going to get all bent out of shape because a teacher was venting to a colleague.

But would you agree that perhaps, just maybe, the teachers should have had a conversation like this out of earshot of the kids. In the teacher's room maybe?